Search Results: still have feelings for him

Hey Dear sisters, I could really use some advice. So, I’m in a loving relationship with this girl, and we’ve been together for 2-3 months now after being friends for over a year. She’s been emotionally supportive, and I’ve really grown to care about her. We flirt, tease, and imagine scenarios, but here’s where I feel stuck…

I’m not super experienced in relationships, and I’m not sure how to take things to the next stage—like, we’re still at the hand-holding and cuddling stage, and I’m not sure how to transition from that to something deeper. I want it to feel natural and not forced, but I just don’t know what’s the right way to go about it.

Another thing is, I’ve been feeling a bit insecure. She’s still in touch with her exes and occasionally drinks and smokes with them. I don’t drink or smoke, so I don’t go to those hangouts, and I trust her, but I can’t help but feel insecure about how she sees me compared to them. I know she says she loves me a lot, but I wonder if my lack of experience or not being part of that lifestyle makes me seem less exciting to her.

Do you have any advice on how to handle these insecurities and move our relationship forward, both emotionally and physically? I really care about her, and I don’t want my feelings of insecurity to mess things up. Would love your perspective on this. 🙏

Some people argue against marriage for a variety of personal, social, and financial reasons. Here are a few commonly cited reasons why some men choose not to get married:

1. **Legal and Financial Risks**: Divorce can be financially devastating due to alimony, child support, and division of assets. Some men feel that the legal structure of marriage disproportionately affects them in cases of separation.

2. **Loss of Personal Freedom**: Marriage can require compromises on independence, personal time, and decision-making, which some men might be unwilling to sacrifice.

3. **Changing Social Norms**: With the rise of cohabitation, long-term relationships without marriage, and acceptance of various family structures, some men feel less social pressure to marry.

4. **Fear of Divorce**: Given that divorce rates can be significant in some countries, some men avoid marriage to prevent emotional pain, financial loss, and the stress of a potentially complicated breakup.

5. **Negative Experiences**: Some men may have seen unhappy marriages in their families or among friends, which influences them to avoid marriage altogether.

6. **Prioritization of Career or Personal Goals**: Some men may choose to focus on their careers, personal growth, or hobbies, feeling that marriage could interfere with their aspirations.

7. **Perception of Modern Marriage Dynamics**: Some men believe that the traditional benefits of marriage no longer apply due to evolving gender roles and societal changes, making it less attractive.

These perspectives don't apply universally, and many men still see great value in marriage depending on personal, cultural, and relational factors.