Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

FinnishBeautyGirl

Since when did we start to be too skinny or fat to be happy?

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

Since when did people start to go to surgeries just because they thought they weren't attractive enough? You don't have an answer, do you?

We are all fragile human beings. Why did we let the society to evolve to be like this?

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

My own experience about this is that apparently I'm too "fat" (5'5 64kg) to be attractive. What the fuck? According to society I should be looking like this:

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

Well, okay. Let's just get over THE FACT, that I'll never look like that. And it's just alright.

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG
Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

Why do curvy girls shame skinny ones? And the other way around? Why? Will it make you feel better about yourself? Probably not.

To me....

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

I also hate how people are body-shaming men.

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

Just stop doing this, people. Why do we have to make people cry? Why are we wasting time on making others feel bad? We only have one life to live. Better make it worth-it!

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG
Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG

Just be yourself, dear people - everybody else is already taken. 💙

#bodyshaming #BATTLEROYALE #TeamRJ

~Isela🐱💙

Why Do We Even Listen to Society? Body Shaming is WRONG
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Fathoms77
    Body-shaming is indeed wrong. It just adds to the rampant self-esteem and self-image problem that is turning into an epidemic.

    I do, however, reserve the right to call someone out who refuses to take responsibility for his or her own life, and flush their health down the toilet. Because it's not THEY who pay the price but all the rest of us... in a world of socialized medicine, the healthy pay for the unhealthy. Take away somebody's pristine health insurance and watch how fast they start caring for themselves. When everyone has to pay for everyone else, than everyone's health is everyone's business.

    It's a system doomed to fail but hey, it's what we've chosen.
    Is this still revelant?
    • What about people who have health issues that don't smoke, drink heavily, and have bad diets?

      Those people you mentioned exists but should people go bankrupt because they can't afford health insurance, medicine and treatments?

      For example, I almost had to drop out of college when I broke my wrist. A good chunk of my college savings went to pay off medical bills instead.

    • Fathoms77

      @bloodmountain1990 It isn't difficult to determine what is self-inflicted and what isn't, despite our desperate desire to create a gray area for everything. Insurance was always meant to cover the accidental, the things we can't possibly control; it was never meant to give us all license to live like slobs and continually steal from everyone else in order to keep doing so.

    • Yes, and I am not excusing that but just because there's people abusing the system and living like slobs doesn't mean it should be ruined for the people who truly need health care and have a freak accident or get sick from something not self induced.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Girl

  • Anonymous
    No matter what we do, no matter where we go, we will always find judgmental behavior and thought. However, instead of constantly trying to defend ourselves all the time, we should listen to the criticisms with a grain of salt. The criticisms may seem hurtful, but if we take them with a grain of salt, we can convert the hurt into help. Maybe we can lose some weight. Maybe we can fix our hair. Maybe we can dress in a different outfit, in style, on budget. But ultimately, it's important to value yourself regardless of what you look like or what you have. And if people reject you for being you, then they have a diversity problem.
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

1350
  • RationalMale
    Is it wrong to shame people for drinking too much, since consuming alcohol will damage your health or possibly mess up your life?

    Is it wrong to shame people for smoking, since that can give you a hundred different health problems?

    Then why is it wrong to shame obese people, for the fact that obesity can give you a hundred different health problems?
    • Emmdk

      At the beginning she writes that we should encourage people instead of shaming them. So instead of shaming a fat person for being fat, we should really just try to help them into realizing it would be better to lose some weight

    • Shorty1991

      I have no sympathy for those people, but yes it is wrong to shame them since its their lives and has nothing to do with you. You think that shaming them is going to make them listen to you. No. Body shamers are people who choose to pick on others to make themselves feel better. Or they just have nothing going on in their boring lives when all they can do is pick on people

    • You're missing the entire point...
      Shaming is wrong. Regardless of what - if they're doing it only to themselves. Would you shame a suicidal person for being suicidal?
      Think a little...

    • Show All
  • Hidden_P
    Fully with you.

    But I do believe full body acceptance is wrong. We need that line that says "love you need a diet" but the rules correctly are so fine and it's ridiculous. I agree with you.
  • 


  • MaLifeBeLikeOooAaah
    Humans are sheep and insecure pussies that's why they follow the crowd.

    But encouraging the ignorant fat people won't work... They should know they're costing the government money, wasting time and damaging themselves mentally and physically. You can encourage them however with responses like "I'm beatiful being big" annoys me... fact, you're not.

    Nice my take :)
  • 3Didnt7say
    Why do we listen to the society? You're forgetting that we ARE the society if you want change then go out there and be the change you want there to be. Don't ask other people to do what you're not doing and even if they don't you can't really force them to like what you like ever. I'm trying to be negative here but its the naked truth no sugar coating, HUAMNITY can never fixed the reason being that your version of a better world and my version of better are completely different to each other and or the next person. So the closest we're ever gon' get to a perfect world is by really being what we want the change to look like and hope for the best. Because from i can see society NEVER stick up for skinny people or even try to build up the skinny people's confidence its always feel sorry for FAT people and boost their confidence by bringing down skinny people because somehow people have it screwed in their head that's you can't complain about being skinny unless you anorexic skinny or really FAT or on the chubby side anything inbtween that get overlooked😏🙄.
  • Winter_Storm_Guy
    I like this very well done thanks for sharing your awesome
    i agree it's wrong to shame people based on their body image
    or their body size we are all normal it's society that has the problem

    :) ;) :D :-)
  • Hopefuldreamer8
    Mine isn't really about my body even though I do work out and eat healthy. It's about my face. I don't have an attractive face, so I work hard at trying to have a nice body to compensate for that, but it doesn't work. The face is more important than the body, and if it wasn't for the fact that I want to be healthy, I probably would have let myself go a long time ago. I actually have when I was in High School. When I was a teen, I let myself go because I was bullied about my face so much. When I hit my 20's, I started to cry because I realized I let my health and body go. So I worked hard on getting a nice body again.

    I just turned 30 today, and I used to hope that once I hit a certain age, people would stop caring so much, but unfortunately that hasn't happened for me yet. So instead, I plan to try hard in my 30's not to care so much about what people think and just enjoy life. It's something I should have started in my 20's instead of wasting them worrying about what people thought. I know it's going to take some time, and it won't happen overnight. However, I don't want to spend my 30's avoiding going out in crowds just because someone might make a snide remark about my face. I don't want to wait until I am old and grey to wait for acceptance. It's something I have to work on even on the internet. I never talk about it around people I know. It's something I keep to myself, and I act happy around everyone. Now I am going to try and turn that to real happiness. So I need to do my best to do what people have been telling me for years to do. Think positive thoughts.

    I might even write a MyTake on it.
  • Ratiocinative
    Does being fat make you a bad person? No, it doesn't, but being fat does make you unhealthy, less attractive, and less happy.

    At 5'5" 143lbs I'd have to guess that you're a little chubby, unless you lift weights often and are stronger than most other women your height. Does that make you unattractive? No, but I guarantee if you lost 10-20 lbs you would see a huge difference in your social and romantic life.

    Ask any man or woman who has gone from obese or even just overweight, to extremely fit with abs, and they will tell you the difference is night and day, especially when you lose the last 10-20 lbs and your jaw and abs really start to show. You will go from little to no attention from the opposite sex, to them coming up to you all the time.

    You're only 15, so I assume you're in high school. Kids tease all the time in high school for anything they can think of. In the real world, adults rarely care what you look like as long as you aren't trying to tell people what to think. If a fat woman goes around telling people that she's beautiful and that anyone who doesn't think she is just can't handle a real woman, then yes, people will probably mock her mercilessly.

    If, on the other hand, a fat woman acts like a normal person, and just has normal friendly conversation with people, and doesn't go around telling men they need to say she's beautiful or else they're part of the oppressive patriarchal society, then people aren't going to care what you weigh.

    Sure, there are some people out there who are jerks and make fun of fat people for no reason, but one thing everyone needs to learn in life is that unless you've done something to offend someone, people treat you based upon how they feel about themselves, not how they feel about you. If some random stranger comes up and insults you for no reason, I can guarantee its because they are unhappy with themselves. If someone is happy and enjoying their life then the though of insulting some random stranger for no reason won't even cross their mind.
  • dipta
    It's funny how the fault lies always with somebody else.
    I'm not saying that there isn't body shaming and that it doesn't pay a cruel part in the diet's world, but there are many people who belittle themselves spontaneously, i. e. they envy the body of other people without anyone even having said anything to them. Gotta blame the mirrors then.
  • Red_Arrow
    Outstanding myTake. It would be nice if a lot of people get on board with it!
  • nog6422
    Since when did we start to be too skinny or fat to be happy?

    Well we've only really started getting fat in the last century or so. Before that only people like kings were fat and they were pretty happy.

    Since when did people start to go to surgeries just because they thought they weren't attractive enough?

    For thousands of years according to Wikipedia.

    You don't have an answer, do you?

    Actually I do.

    Why did we let the society to evolve to be like this?

    Why wouldn't we?

    My own experience about this is that apparently I'm too "fat" (5'5 64kg) to be attractive. What the fuck?

    That's actually about a 23.6 BMI which is completely normal. Not fat by any standards.

    Why do curvy girls shame skinny ones?

    Not all do. Some do because they want to feel better about themselves.

    And the other way around? Why?

    Again, not all do. But some do to feel better about themselves.

    Will it make you feel better about yourself?

    Apparently so.

    Why do we have to make people cry? Why are we wasting time on making others feel bad?

    What do you mean "we"? I don't do that.
  • Chromekids
    At the same time their has to be a clear distinction on body shaming an otherwise healthy person and calling a morbidly obese person out. Obesity in the US has become a plague costing billions in medical bills. It effect productivity, confidence, and health. Body shaming is one thing but saying it's okay for kids to self inflict diabetes and heart disease is another.
  • ouchthathurt
    Beauty Standards are only used to get a rough estimate on how attractive someone of the same sex would be. Determining the attractiveness of someone of the opposite sex is instinctual and doesn't follow some kind of standards set by society.
  • jjmarvin
    Except dick size. It's so acceptable to make fun of we used it during our presidential election ad nauseum. So basically every girl in this country laughed their asses off for months and didn't give a shit about body shaming then. Yup, I'm the only one it's ok to make fun of. Whatever, girls are evil and hateful and hurting the guys they see as garbage makes them happy.
  • lost_alice
    I feel bad about myself but it isn't because people make me feel this away or because I don't look like models I just feel weird... great take
  • Satanic666Deathslut
    Nice take on this! Your questions are always amazing and I truly agree with you. It is society and mainstream media shoving down their standards upon us. Society as a whole, is screwed up. Nobody deserves to be shamed, people should be encouraged. :)
  • AhGojira
    Everything you said is bullshit. Stop putting all the weight on your body/looks. If you're self esteem is tied to the amount of positive sexual attention you gain while attention whoring, then you deserve to fall on your face. Develop yourself as a well rounded human.
  • Nothanks700
    I think it's messed up when people make snide comments about me being skinny. Why is that acceptable? Would you make comments to someone about them being fat? Ofcousrre not, that's incredibly insensitive and rude. Just don't comment on people's body shape; take care of your own how you want- that's it.
  • ParamountArmada
    most "body shaming" comes from other girls being jealous of other girls and girls tend to only listen to other girls because they are all gay and bi-sexual now.
    no girl cares about guys opinions.
  • Kuraj
    "Well, okay. Let's just get over THE FACT, that I'll never look like that. And it's just alright."

    No it's not alright, and that is the damn point.
    Positive encouragement isn't gonna do shit, because people like you just refuse to acknowledge there is a problem.
    Criticism at least gets the damn point across.

    How do you suggest we "motivate and encourage" you to do anything when you simply don't want to do anything?
  • foil7
    Your description pretty much sums it all up. Shaming people's body makes them feel as if they are nothing. Then again, in my case, it made me motivated to work harder to cut down on my fat. The thing is, nobody has a "perfect" body. In those graphs up there where you compared the perfect female body in the eyes of both genders, it contained the essence of about five different people. Nobody's perfect, looks-wise so people shouldn't be making fun of others.
  • Library
    Yes it's so wrong and hurtful. I experienced this in high school when people body shamed me for being too tall...
  • AleDeEurope
    Being in the science field has to be so difficult nowadays. You can prove people that being fat is detrimental, that it not only affects your looks, but it also affects your brain, that you're more likely to be less happy if you're fat, that you're more likely to get a heart stroke if you're fat...
    You can prove all these and you'll get called a fat shamer, an asshole... like if it's your fault that nature works this way.

    You're right, we should stop listening to society. We should stop listening to all those "it's ok to be fat" comments, and we should start listening to doctors and specialists. If they say being fat is bad, then stop trying to make it ok.
    • Emmdk

      No we should encourage people to lose weight instead of shaming them into losing weight. there's a difference

    • @Emmdk How is "you're going to die" not encouraging enough?

  • Alex88F
    body shaming is both natural and wrong
    i mean, if you have to be ultra skinny or ultra fat to be accepted is just insane to me
    and its natural cos i can have my opinion regarding it - which is - if you're too skinny you're unhealthy same if you're too fat and you hide behind the "curvy" tag. bones are bones, fat is fat, get over it.
  • GoodGuyGregGGG
    Body shaming isn't wrong. Stop wanting apporval of peoe.

    Body shaming ia only wrong with kids because they dont know any better.

    As far aadult u can control the image. And voice and people around u.

    Change your self or not
    Block people
    And only hang out with people who dont care

    Dont get mad if the guy doesnr want u becuase u dont match his image in his head.

    Guys. Dont be mad at girls if u dont match the image i her head
  • PG1997
    Well SHAMING and insulting someone for anything is usually wrong, but telling people it's ok to be fat and obese is wrong as well. Why is it okay to be fat? If you're fat, guys won't like you as much as thin girls. It's not said to make you feel bad.. it's reality. If I take care of myself, why would I date someone who doesn't when I can do better?

    How would most obese girls be happy if guys are picking other girls over them? The truth can be unpopular but it's the damn truth.
    • PG1997

      To be clear- I think society (mostly girls) overdoes. I've seen amazing looking girls think they're fat and go "wtf?" But telling someone being obese is ok is like telling a girl not shaving her arms is ok... well then don't be mad when no one wants to f*ck you.

  • Darkone1
    NO, everyone have "freedom of speech". I am not saying you should slut shame everyone but I think its OK to do it with obese people cuz they are risking their life.
    • Emmdk

      Again, she's not saying we shouldn't encourage them to lose weight, she's just saying we shouldn't shame them for their physical state

    • Darkone1

      @Emmdk Guess what,
      they never listen until its brought up in this way.

  • kitty71
    Because the human beign always prefer to listen to what other people think about you in order to be accepsted therfore people have self esteem issues.
  • EmpatheticLady
    I do agree with the second image about being supportive. :)
  • posted
    Lets all just shit rainbows while we're at it. People are becoming such pussies.
  • John_Doesnt
    We listen to society because it's human nature to want to fit in. I know it's bad to do that, but fighting 50,000 years of human evolution is pretty damn hard.
  • adrianalima0
    I think people should STFU and let people live their lives the way they want, to look they way they want without having to stick their stupid noses into it.
  • Amuro
    If someone it doing something unhealthy tell them. If they are anorexic tell them they are killing themselves. If they are way too fat and all they do is eat and don't exercise tell them. They are killing themselves it's no better than someone chain smocking cigarettes, drinking every day, or snorting Cocaine every day. Doing these things are unhealthy and they will kill you.

    Most people in America are fat it's true it's not a men's or women's issue it's a people issue. Getting at a healthy weight is not an issue of dieting it's about changing your lifestyle and changing the way you eat.

    Could you answer my question.

    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2112691-was-i-wrong-to-ask-for-the-money-back
  • RandomBritishGuy94
    Shaming is the wrong way to go but the whole "plus size" movement doesn't help people getting healthy.

    In the UK being large is actually hurting Society because of the NHS. If you pay your own medical bills fine but you should respect those who otherwise look after you.

    As long as you're healthy looks shouldn't matter but the fact is they do. It's nature to be attracted to a set type of person. Being large normally means you're unhealthy and well you can find people interested in you that number is small.
  • EchoOfLife
    here's my thoughts, I think shaming someones body is insensitive and wrong. Who are you to judge someone else. I think if you are comfortable in your skin, then do you. HOWEVER, I think you can strive and work to be the best you, you can be. Maybe if you are 300 pounds you may be comfortable in your body, but do you feel thats the best you can be? there's a difference between body shaming and being healthy.

    So, in short, NEVER EVER SHAME SOMEONE, and if you are comfortable so be it. HOWEVER, don't give up there, always strive to be the best you, you can be!
  • redeyemindtricks
    I'm fully with ya... as long as you're allowing for the difference between body-shaming (= bad) and genuine concern for someone's health (= not bad at all).

    Like, if it's obvious enough that someone is engaging in self-destructive habits (massive weight gain over a short period... or the opposite, as from anorexia/bulimia nervosa), then a good friend/partner WILL call that out.
    With tact, of course -- and empathy. And NOT shame. But, friends/partners look out for each other.

    Beyond that... YES! Well said, girlfriend. (:
  • fuqthegovt
    Sure I have an answer: since the day humans came down from the trees and probably before when the dinosaurs went extinct and mammals took over. Wanting to mate with what is attractive (generally that doesn't include fat, deformities, or anything that gives off a vibe of bad genes) while wanting to avoid what is unattractive is the basis of evolution with every animal, including humans. It's nature's version of selective breeding. That's probably why fat- or ugly-shaming is so much fun and amusing (Nicole Arbor demonstrates this well, even if she does piss off a lot of fat people or people that are insecure with themselves for other good/obvious reasons), on some level everyone is hardwired to do so and it's instinctive.
  • TheFlak38
    It always depends on the person's status how someone defines body shaming. When I tell a horrible fat cunt she should stop eating because she's too heavy and being overweight is NOT healthy, call it body shaming or not, Im realistic and warn her about what she's going to suffer.
    When I have horrible fat people living on benefits that WE are paying with OUR taxes, I will show no respect to these biological ruins.
    www.telegraph.co.uk/.../...but-refuse-to-diet.html
  • bloodmountain1990
    Appearance/body shaming is wrong but on the flip side of that, no one should be shamed for not finding someone attractive.

    For example, I've had times where a girl used misleading pictures and info and said she was average but when I met them, they were obese. Aren't they shaming themselves because they're hiding what they look like?

    I personally hate being in those situations because I'm not gonna insult them for how they look but I'm also not gonna lead them on and tell them they're attractive when I don't think they are. Appearance may not be everything but it matters somewhat.
  • ChocoLada
    Being fat is not shameful, but it's definitely not healthy for anyone.
  • sp33d
    There are so many things that are "wrong". I, for one, neither have the time nor the patience to worry about semantics.
  • Jordank922
    Oh shut up we are attracted to who we are. It's not something we control. If we vocalize our attraction and you get offended then get over it.
    • It's controlled a little bit. Everybody wants to date girls with ass since Kim K and Nicki Minaj. First only back people did.

  • NightOwl8801
    I agree with this.
    It's absolutely wrong , no matter what you look like or your body type you're beautiful no matter what
  • YourName123
    totally driven by women, for women, to women.

    men just want at fit woman and dont care much about all these details
  • JensonStatement
    Shaming is wrong in every form but people should also know what is healthy and that's what most people now forgot. They all want to be that perfect or only listen to them selfs.
    According to men; men listen up to society and society in beauty is mostly ruled by women.
    A few men in the fashion indusrty do but mostly women.
    Example: Most people said brades were ulgy. Now Kylie has them, every girl wants to. Kim K started the fat ass show with Nick Minaj and now everybody wants to twerk and have fat ass while first it was ugly.
    So for once and for all; shaming is ugly but be careful with your weight because over 100kg is not healthy at al and under 40kg also.
  • rogerthat123
    lol, i read it as "cara develinge's fece" and "megan fox's fece" with that small print :-D
  • CreativeUserame
    I think being fat IS unhealthy, but I think obese people should be warned of the health risks of obesidy
  • ThatBritishLad
    If I listened to society I'd just be a different kind of cunt.
  • shawnski
    My opinion is some of the comments on this about other people are APPALLING!
  • smorgasbord
    does it matter? people need to suck it up, it's how it is.
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