The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

SpiderManFan2002

One day I was bored out of my mind, I'd done my homework and revision for that day, my best friend was on holiday, my other friends were busy, so I went looking for something to watch and found this documentary. It's called: "The Great British School Swap" where racially segregated children visit and study at each other's schools, learning about each other as they do so. There were 12 British white students and 12 British ethnic students. Before meeting each other the two groups made absurd assumptions about each other, which were purely based on negative stereotypes, and some I don't even know how they came up with.

So, that documentary gave me the idea to conduct a little experiment on G@G. I'm a British Pakistani Muslim girl, and I wanted to know what people would think of me if I just told people those four things about myself.

To be specific, this question: British Pakistani Muslim Girl. What do you think?

I got nice responses, funny responses and responses which were just ugly.

Let's dive straight in!

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

That's a fair point. Here's how I can be both British and Pakistani: I'm born in England, so were parents. However, my grandparents came to England in the 60s and 70s, from Pakistan. So I am born in England which makes me British, but my grandparents were born in Pakistan, meaning I'm of Pakistani descent. I love being British, but I don't want to forget my heritage, therefore, I consider myself to be British Pakistani.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Haha, my parents listened to Queen when they were younger- I've heard their songs and yes, they're songs are pretty good not going to lie. Fun fact- Freddie Mercury was of Indian descent.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Haha, I am unless I'm roasting my friends- or when you insult Spider-Man. ;P

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

I've had a good conversation with this person. He told me he believed that Muslim girls are not allowed to talk to white people because their fathers and brothers tell them they can't.

That isn't always the case. I am a Muslim girl, and a lot of my friends are Muslim girls. We live in a diverse area- full of people of various ethnicities including white people, and a lot of our friends are white. My best friend is a white girl, I went to her house 3 times last week and I plan to go again on Sunday.

He then went on to say how Muslims in his country segregate themselves from the wider community because they don't want to know white people.

That's not always the case.

Sometimes, Muslims get attacked. For their religion, or skin colour or both. A pregnant Muslim lady was kicked in the stomach, her baby died. She was attacked for being Muslim.

Even in my city, there are certain areas I avoid because there is a possibility of me being attacked in those areas, for my skin colour, or my religion or both. I'm about 5'1, I weigh about 43-45kg, I walk with a limp, I can't defend myself, so it's best for me to avoid those areas.

And Muslims who can defend themselves would most likely avoid those areas too. Because the minute a Muslim fights back, he or she may be seen as a trouble causer, and get labelled all sorts so it's best to just stay out of trouble in the first place.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

I'm not going to lie, I was expecting an opinion like this.

I do believe in both conservative and liberal values.

And this person believes I am "oppressed" because of my religion- they claim to have lived in a Muslim country.

Well:

I'm not forced to wear the hijab- I show my hair as I like.

I can wear what I like.

Yes, my family and I have disagreements- and sometimes they say things or I say things but in the end we realise our wrongdoing discuss things, and usually, our peace offering is a cup of tea.

I'm free to study.

"Let there be no compulsion in religion" a quote from the Qur'an. So anybody who forces in the name of Islam is going against Islam. Full stop.

This person also sent me a video on claiming how the hijab is not empowering and in fact oppressing.

Well if the woman chooses to wear the hijab because she feels it empowers her, it is not oppressing. Because it's her choice. Full stop.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Such a sweet thing to say. I love that you respect my religion and my nationality. I also have Indian friends who are great. :)

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Yes, this person has made good guesses.

I like being British.

I fit in well with British culture.

I like my Pakistani heritage, I think it's important to know who I am.

People assume I'm Indian all the time.

British culture has had an effect on me. You are a product of your environment after all.

Actually no- I speak a little bit of Punjabi.

Evening meals during Ramadan are the best

I do hold a lot of views my parents and grandparents hold- but not all.

I have had a decent education.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

I don't know what this person means.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Firstly, I believe in Jesus. Jesus is a prophet in Islam, we call him Isa, and he is the son of Maryam (Mary) we don't believe in the Trinity, but we believe that Isa (Jesus) is the Messiah.

Secondly, I can't cook to save my life. My mother is the one who can cook a mean biryani. Last week I and my best friend got hungry at her house, we struggled to cook packet noodles. Yeah, I know we're terrible, but I'll learn after exams I guess.

Thirdly, you are bang on but I'm not going to say which one.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Thank you. It's always nice to hear a good and respectful opinion. As for my accent, it's standard where I'm from and I'm glad you believe my beliefs should be respected.

There need to be more people with your mindset, regarding beliefs and respect, in the world.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Definitely British. Spent my whole life in England, never been outside of England, so what I am if I'm not British?

Your little analogy about a dog born in a stable, I can debunk it right here. You're correct a dog born in a stable is not a horse.

But a dog and a horse are both different species.

Whether a human is born in England or a human is born in Pakistan- they are still human.

If two horses from one stable are transported to another, and they have a child in the new stable then that baby horse is from that stable.

My best friend is British Hungarian- her grandfather is Hungarian her parents are born in England. She's been to Hungary and many other countries. Is she British? Yes.

Boring- that's a matter of opinion.

Secluded- I go out to meet my friends when we can be bothered, I got to school and socialise as well as study- I don't see how I'm kept a secret from anyone haha.

narrow-minded philosophically - Actually I and many people around me, for example, my teachers consider me to be open minded.

nearly non-existent personality - Again a matter of opinion, but my friends and people who know me would say otherwise.

will likely end up being married off to some other Pakistani and will get stuck at home, unless she wants to taste knuckle sandwich- My parents haven't discussed marriage with me properly, they are more concerned about me getting to university and how we're going to pay for it.

Potential threat to security - Okay, okay... I'm 5'1, 43-45kg, I have diplegia I walk with a limp, I can't fight physically to save my life, yet I'm a threat to security? Sure.

Very likely to give birth to future terrorists and criminals - I'd raise my children to be good law abiding citizens, who will follow their dreams.

You assumed all this because you knew four things about me? Nationality. Ethnicity. Religion. Gender. Prejudice much?

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Product of incest - No my parents aren't cousins. Nor were my grandparents. And cousin marriage is nothing to do with religion and is not apart of my culture.

Urdu- Actually Punjabi.

Sharia courts - Never been to a court.

Make-up - Don't wear or own any.

Burkas - Never worn one.

Social media - Don't most of us regardless of nationality, ethnicity, religion or gender?

Typical - Not sure what you mean by that.

Slough? More Pakistanis than white people?

https://www.slough.gov.uk/downloads/Demographics.pdf

Are you sure about that?

Benefits - Many people get them in England. Regardless of their ethnicity or religion.

Scams - Never scammed

Cheat - Only in monopoly.

Drug rackets - Never done drugs. Only taken paracetamol and calpol.

Immunity from prosecution - Nope sorry, never been prosecuted.

Bazaars - I go to the bazaar sometimes. I see no problem with it, it gets a little crowded that's the only thing I hate.

Vapes - Never vaped. Fun fact, I've seen kids at school vape of various ethnicities.

Matalan - I go to Matalan. Problem?

Child sex rings - That's just sick and wrong, I wonder what type of person can think that.

Down syndrome - Nobody in my family has that.

Autism - One of my cousins who is a mixed-race child has Autism.

other forms of mental retardation - People of all ethnicities have mental disabilities. It happens for all kinds of reasons.

(All that inbreeding takes its toll) - What inbreeding?

genetic conditions - I have diplegia passed down from my father. Nothing to do with inbreeding, my parents aren't related.

Let me know if I've missed anything - Yeah you missed a lot. You were so inaccurate. You can really assume all this about a person, just by knowing four things about them? Says a lot about you as a person.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Actually, no. My parents and I haven't really spoken about marriage much. Right now, I'm sixteen years old their biggest concern is how they're going to pay for me to go to university and study, where I'm going to study, and if I'll move out or not.

To them, my education is much more important than marriage at the moment.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

You disagree? You know what? That's okay. Not everybody is going to agree with my beliefs, and that is fine. People are people. As long as you respect them that is okay. You respect me I respect you. If someone disrespects me I avoid them and I wouldn't stoop down to their level. You wouldn't hate me as a person? That says a lot about you. Shows your maturity. Thanks for the honest, respectful opinion.

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Inshallah to you too brother. :)

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

There are a lot of rich things which are apart of our culture which people tend to ignore.

Food. Biryani.

Clothes. The salwar kameez with all the different embroidery designs

The shopping. All the market places.

The music. My favourite Pakistani song has always been 'dil dil Pakistan'

Celebrations like Eid and Ramadan.

The huge weddings where it's basically a feast.

All the different languages. Punjabi. Urdu. Pashto. Hindi.

Pakistani tea.

And who can forget the cricket?

Then we've got the British culture.

Fish and chips.

Tea.

All the soaps to mock.

Phil Mitchell (because like it or not he's a national treasure)

The clothes.

The fact that you can walk down the street and just see takeaways from all different cultures.

The music.

I could go on forever, but you get the picture. The point is I'm glad I've got both cultures, and appreciate them both.

I wouldn't say my eyebrows are perfect, and they're flat, not arched, I wear Pakistani dress on special occasions, I don't know what MD means, haha. Behind closed doors, I just sleep and write and study most of the times and go out every now and then to see my friends, I get pimples every now and then because I'm a teenager and those things happen.

Thank you :)

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

True that. :)

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

I love potatoes. ;P

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Fish and chips - love those.

Religion - Yes. That is what Islam is and I follow it.

Indian - Many people assume I am.

Female sex - That I am too.

Saving the best opinion I got for last...

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.

Okay, you caught me red-handed. I'm drinking tea right now, and it is a cup of good tea, guilty as charged! :P

What makes your opinion the best is the final sentence. This person is absolutely right. There isn't enough information to form an opinion on me. You can't just do that from somebody's nationality, ethnicity, religion or gender.

I was looking for an answer like this.

It was a trick question.

Well done sir. :)

And I'm finally done. Finished. Thank you for reading. This took me ages to write, but I'm glad I was able to go through each opinion and respond in a way where everyone can see. I hid the usernames because I didn't know who would be comfortable with me mentioning them on my post. Feel free to call yourself out if you see your opinion here. :)

The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Accidental_Genius
    Well... I wrote something about something similar... U can go and read it.. I think U will find Ur answer there and make sure to read comments as well :) I think that may help U in some ways ;)
    Is this still revelant?
  • Cage4
    Yay you're telling people that human beings are not all alike when they should be knowing that already.
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girls

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What Girls & Guys Said

220
  • No_Archons
    It's not just muslims that segregate themselves... any time too much of one culture immigrates to another, this happens. The problem is the numbers. Too many of one culture coming to another creates big problems with assimilation, and to add to it, muslims do not assimilate well. They assimilate others into their culture, they do not get assimilated.
  • ZeussLightningBolt
    I only read the first few, 'cuz you posted so much. I will just say, you can't blame them for being racist and attacking Muslims, when Pakistani gangs rape British girls and run people over.
    But I've read of Niqab girls attacking pregnant Muslim girls for wearing revealing clothing, so I feel there's a lot of "an eye for an eye" going on.
    And I didn't necessarily believe the Muslim would be perceived as the aggressor. The British government is always quick to side with the Muslims. A father once went to rescue his daughter from a Pakistani rape gang, and police arrested THE FATHER. Another rape victim was arrested for drunk and disorderly. And I read a story about a Pakistani man who killed someone, chopped him up and then served his body parts in Kebabs at his restaurant. So you shouldn't be surprised that a lot of British people have negative perceptions of Pakistanis.

    As for the, "Muslims setting up their own communities", I agree with both sides of the argument. Maybe not so much with Muslims, because a lot of then don't to assimilate, but with other immigrant groups, I know locals don't accept them and treat them like immigrants instead of like citizens. But Muslims bring traditions that have no place in Western society. I think Muslims shouldn't migrate to MUSLIM countries, unless they're really secular.
    Even on GAG, there was one British Muslim girl defending terrorists and saying American deserved to have 9/11.
    I personally wish there were more Pakistanis like YOU, but the majority I've come across are the complete opposite. There needs to be reform within the Pakistani community if you want people to stop being racist against you.
    There are a lot of Pakistani communities you can't go either. I saw a video where a Niqabi girl told a white British girl that she needs to cover up in her OWN country.
    Imagine what would happened if Christians started immigrating to Muslim countries and telling the locals how they have to dress and act. That would not fly over well.
    So you see why many Western people are resentful of Muslims.
    Also, if they feel they aren't welcome, why do they continue migrating to these countries? I wouldn't want to live in a country where I felt I was unwelcome.
    If you wanna live in a Western country, dress like a Western woman. If not, go live in a Muslim country instead of bringing your customs to Christian countries.
    • ". I will just say, you can't blame them for being racist and attacking Muslims when Pakistani gangs rape British girls and run people over" - In that case, would you blame a black person if they attacked a white person because the KKK happen to be white?

      "The British government is always quick to side with the Muslims" Is it though? Are we not going to talk about when David Cameron sent letters to the mosques asking them to sort out terrorist incidents? The mosques have nothing to do with that people just go there to pray.

      My father was a hardworking businessman, and he got a nice car, the police pulled him over and said to him "well, we think we know what your part-time job is." Meaning, they assumed he was a drug dealer. I wonder what would cause them to assume that.

      ". And I read a story about a Pakistani man who killed someone, chopped him up and then served his body parts in Kebabs at his restaurant" Firstly, where are you reading these stories and how do you know they're true? Secondly, I read a story, where a Sikh man was stabbed because somebody believed he was Muslim even though he was clearly wearing a turban. How ignorant.

      " So you shouldn't be surprised that a lot of British people have negative perceptions of Pakistanis." Are you not going to talk about the Pakistani man, who managed to put these grooming gangs behind bars?

    • And how do Muslims not assimilate in society?

      "Even on GAG, there was one British Muslim girl defending terrorists and saying American deserved to have 9/11" You said it yourself. One British Muslim girl. Had that been a British Christian girl, or a British atheist girl, would've her religion stood out to you?

      "There needs to be reform within the Pakistani community if you want people to stop being racist against you" Does there though? Or are you looking at one small minority of people within a community who happen to do bad things?

      Imagine if I did that with the white American community. I see racist ignorant white Americans on the internet all the time. I saw a video of two white American kids calling a Sikh boy a terrorist, on a school bus. Now those are just kids, they don't know what they're saying but where did they learn that from? Maybe their parents?

      Which country are you from and what is your ethnicity?

  • 


  • ElectricSupply
    I only got one wrong! Cool!

    I would challenge the idea that there isn’t enough information to have a preconceived notion. I made an educated guess based on Muslims, British, Pakistani, and British Muslim Pakistani people that I know. And I only got one dead wrong. (Urdu.) I could have been way off, of course, but it was unlikely.

    Preconceived notions aren’t necessarily bad. Classification is at the heart of how humans learn; it’s unavoidable. What’s bad is the inability or unwillingness to adjust your worldview when a preconceived notion is shown to be wrong.

    It was a fun exercise, and I hope it did broaden a few of your respondent’s worldview. :)
    • Yes but remember I'm one of many British Pakistani Muslim Girls. I have friends who have different lives to me. Some can cook. Some dress differently to me. Some have different interests to me.

      We're people, we're all different in one way or another. :)

      But thank you anyway :)

    • Of course! :)

  • lightbulb27
    Interesting. We all develop pre conceived notions of people... our minds make a picture and fill in the blanks with what we've seen, which means we aren't always right... assumptions.

    To me what is important is that some of the things you list you have because of your freedom to do so. There are people in the world who don't want you to have those freedoms and those rights will have to be protected and sometimes fought for. Always been the case.
  • weirdoweirdo
    What I get triggered from is that you aren't British if you come from England, you're English then. You're British if you say you're from the UK and England just happens to be a part of the UK. Please dont mix it up lol.
    • I'm British because England is in the UK.
      British is my nationality.
      English is an ethnicity, my ethnicity isn't English- it's Pakistani.

      :)

    • The English people are a nation (Thus it could also be a nationality) AND an ethnic group native to England who speak the English language.

  • Guanfei
    Only blame your own community for the reputation you have. Not just pakistanis, but muslims as a whole, who are known to be very reluctant to integrate, and to use the race card (even tho islam isn't a race) to get away with a lot of stuff.
    Problem here is that you take your own example and point of view and make it a generality. But just because you're like that, or didn't went through some situation mentioned here (such as sharia courts, or any kind of crime) doesn't mean many others from your community didn't either.
    And with those children rape cases covered by authorities, that doesn't make it better. It's know that muslims (from different communities, here it's mostly maghrebis immigrants) are generally at the top of the crime charts, around 70% of the criminals here.
    And of course, they often show hate towards the country that welcomed them, and the people living there.

    You can't blame people for having that opinion about muslims when they caused it themselves. And it's only recent. Here, old immigrants are very integrated, while it's mostly the following generation that started to bring that racist bullshit.
    You said it, you were born and raised in england, yet you keep a culture that is, in fact, not yours. At this point, you're not a pakistani, you should consider yourself completely British. You should consider British culture and history as yours. I can understand that your grandparents would keep that culture, since they were born in it, but it's not your case.
    • Why shouldn't I want to keep what my grandparents gave me? I find it so valuable, should my Hungarian friend throw away her culture too?

      "Racist bullshit" My grandparents used to take getting shouted and sworn at for their skin colour, but their children didn't and nor would I.

      ". It's know that muslims (from different communities, here it's mostly maghrebis immigrants) are generally at the top of the crime charts, around 70% of the criminals here." - Have you ever asked the question why? Muslims are human after all, and nobody commits a crime without reason. Had an atheist, or Christian person committed the crime would you look at their religion or would you see just a criminal?

      "And of course, they often show hate towards the country that welcomed them, and the people living there." Well, my grandparents were good hardworking individuals in their youth and the amount of racial abuse they got when they came here was disgusting.

  • Someguynamedbob
    As a Muslim who grew up in the uk your used to the more progressive Muslim traits than most muslims around the world, in a lot of Muslim countries women are not allowed outside without a male escorting them Along with many other oppressive traits, that’s why a lot of people assume your being oppressed even though you personally are not
  • John_Doesnt
    I've only had bad experiences with Muslims and my friends have all had bad experiences with Muslims too.
    • 1.8 billion Muslims in the world. Did you and your friends meet all 1.8 billion? Well, you haven't met me so that's a firm no.

      You have only met a fraction of the Muslim community. And like any other community, the Muslim community has good and bad people. A lot of us are good people.

      :)

    • Yes, we met all 1.8 billion and they're all assholes.

    • Of course you have

    • Show All
  • Iamagoodguy
    That guy who talked about autism being ’mental retardation’ is mentally retarded most of the extremely smart people had autism or wasn't diagnosed but still showed signs of it or something like that I believe Albert Einstein had dyslexia I also have autism but my family ain't inbred and there Christian British mostly English slightly Irish I think that guy is just stupid I also don't get why people hate on people from Pakistani that 1 isn't even where the terrorist are coming from and b they have a lovely culture go I saw a video I don't know if true but a guy went there and he needed a house and asked someone they let him stay and gave food would-be happen in Britain saw another where a guy hasn't even spent a penny because the would take it because they didn't want the money because they where there guest in there country so of what I've seen while the country may not be as safe as the uk because of war the people seem nice
    • Good opinion about mental illnesses. :)

      People are people wherever you go, there will be good people, there will be bad people, you just can't judge someone based on their nationality, ethnicity, religion or gender. Just look at how they play out humanity :)

  • Nadim171
    Britian is a Christian catholic nation, convert to christianity if you want to live there. If you don't you shouldn't be considered British
    • Ewwwww

      Britain is not Catholic

    • Nadim171

      Yes, however it was... it's so sad to see British catholicsm and monarchy falling.

    • Nadim171

      If they still had king George I doubt this would happen...
      I don't know what is wrong with the queen, probably she is too aware of what's happening because of her age. I beleive king Richard the lionheart would be ashamed if he knew that his granddaughter would let all these Muslim heathens in

    • Show All
  • TURK-CONQUEROR
    Good take but I'm sure you agree that Britain is more accepting and accepting of you as a Pakistani woman than say Pakistani and that a lot more white women and girls are attacked by Pakistani men than the other way around.
    • Actually- it's statistically proven that there are actually more white sex offenders than ethnic ones. I'll get up the stats a little later.

  • ZicoLad96
    Ignorance is what the trouble is..
    I would think and tell you that I am a 49 yr old father of 3 from Lpool im white and was Indoctrinated into the Catholic religion...
    I still have more in Common with you people in Palastine Iraq Syria any colour any religion then i do with the elite ruling Classes
  • MD is Medical Doctor, I think. In other words intelligent, hard working and successful. (Like an girlfriend I had once, who was a British Pakistani Muslim Woman.)

    Nice Take.
  • nerms123
    Wow. You wrote a masters thesis on GAG. I think you have a bright future. 💯💯💯
  • Ultimate_Gohan
    Are u a hybrid? The Reality of Being a British Pakistani Muslim Girl.
  • Hawky_
    Well I have to say... I'm shocked by what you've written...
    You actually admit to cheating at Monopoly?
    Everybody cheats at Monopoly - that's the whole reason for being banker.
    • I played it one time with my friends, I was going to play honestly I swear but they decided to steal my money so I thought: "Say goodbye to your properties losers" xD

    • Hawky_

      Lmao

    • Hawky_

      I'm ALWAYS banker...

  • Waffles731
    A nationalistic British guy complains about an ethnic group's incest, all while ignoring the fact that the Queen is married to her cousin.
    • Did she really? I didn't know that.

      To be honest, I don't take much interest in the royal family, the only thing I find them useful for is tourism.

    • Yeah the queen is married to someone who is simultaneously both her third and second cousin

  • Tanyasuperior
    I think... when in Rome... if you are in a foreign country you try to fit in
  • ENTP_EMO
    sexy counter-argumentive mytake
  • motownplayer2000
    Your beautiful! I would love to talk to someone like you!
    • Thank you! And I'm always up for a conversation. If you have a question or something feel free to ask☺

  • tartaarsaus
    This was an interesting read.
  • SUMAIREBRAHIM
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