NEVER PAY for a woman on a DATE. Do you agree?

[Anonymous]

In some places like Atlanta, the reverse wage gap is as high as 20%. In the western world, women in their 20s outearn men, and even in their 30s in some places. This gap is steadily increasing.

Men should not be expected to pay on dates or get the shorter end of the stick in ANY WAY in a society which is for gender-equality.

Or are men the new slaves?

Agreed, women are equals.

Disagree, women are special creatures

I don't date.

Updates

+1 y

"Males pay for dates specifically to show economic power... impressing them with your ability to afford things."

You're basically saying men SHOULD be richer than women... and that men SHOULD have to pay for dates... that men SHOULD have enough money to support women.

This completely goes against GENDER EQUALITY

Updates

+1 y

WOW look at all the women saying they deserve spl treatment and look at the army of brainwashed men saying we should discriminate against ourselves based on sex. LOL! WTF?

[WhiteSteve]

I mean, technically there's no rules about it, but I'm old school. A gentleman always pays, I don't care who makes what, and honestly, it's not really a question i'd lead off with, or really ask at any point. "Hey, I was wondering if you'd let me take you out sometime. One thing though: I need to see your W-2 forms from last year to compare to mine. Y'know... to figure out who's paying."

I'm a pretty old school guy in the sense of the the male-female dating dynamic, regardless of how society might change. You treat a lady like a lady, I open doors, pull out chairs at restaurants, I was even taught to escort women on a sidewalk with myself on the outside towards the street, to take any puddle splashes that might occur. I don't do it in a geeky, try-hard way and come off like a loser, you just do it and don't make a big deal about it. Also depends on the situation, I'm not going to pull out a barstool for her at the club, haha, but in certain situations you should act in a gentlemanly manner, just don't be a stiff about it or do it with some expectation of a response from her, you just simply do it. But anyway, paying for the date is part of the dating dynamic. I've had girls offer to pay their own way before, and I certainly appreciate the courtesy and consideration, but I politely decline and tell them it's on me. It's just how I roll. Once we're dating for a while, ok, maybe if she offers to spring for us once in a while too, that's fine with me, but in the early going, I'll be paying for the dates. If we were just young kids with not a lot of money, that's a fair conversation to have at some point, but I'll probably be doing the initial asking out, so I'd rightfully pay for the date.

I don't understand this counter-feminist mentality. The roles and statuses of women in society are ever-advancing, and that's great, we should all be on an even playing field, and I can even understand if there's an overcompensation for a time. If women are making 20% more than men (which I question), isn't that all fair for historically making 20-40% LESS since, well... forever? Obviously women will be vigilant for their rights, as would any group that has been getting the short end of the stick for so long.

[sjoes006]

Yeah I mean most women will pay for every other date or so. If I were a guy I would say nothing but if she NEVER paid for a date quietly get rid of her.

[WhiteSteve]

@sjoes006 Right! If I get the impression that this girl is just letting me buy her free meals and drinks, and generally sucks, then there won't be future dates to pay for anyway. But it's a safe assumption that most girls are on the level and actually are interested to get to know you. So many guys are on extra gold digger alert, and it's like "bro, who are you, Lebron James? You're nowhere near important enough to be gold-dug.", haha. I think most women these days are prepared to pay their own way. All I need is a simple "thank you" at the end of the night and I'm good, and you should be giving that to anyone whether you're a man or a woman, that's just common courtesy.

[AleDeEurope]

If it's the first date, pays the one who asks, after that, it's 50-50, I'm not a charity, I'm not rich either, and she's not an angel who deserves special treatment, so unless I've been dating her for a while and trust her, I won't pay for her. I will only pay for the date if it's like a coffee or something, cause it's no biggie.
Waaaaay too many women who go on dates just for free meals, I'm not gonna be a fool.

[Asker]

Even on "no biggie" expenses it should be 50-50. And of course, women will never ask on a date, so men WILL pay the first time. But I agree with you

[AleDeEurope]

True, she still should pay her half even if it's just a coffee, but it's not too much of a hassle and will give a good impression. I know I'll give a good impression if I pay for a full dinner, but I'd be a fool if I spent a lot of money and then she says "this isn't gonna work". This is what many women don't understand.
Thanks for the MHO, by the way.

[Asker]

No probs! Women are not concerned about making good impressions on us, so they don't spoil us... but expect the reverse. Its disgusting discrimination based on sex.

The entire western civilization claims to support equality, but actually oppresses men

[BeeNee]

If you don't want to pay for dates, then don't ask a woman to go out. Simply put, if you ask someone, anyone, male or female out on a date, you are supposed to pay regardless of your gender or their's. Who asks most women out... men. It's really not that complicated. If you do not want to pay, feel free to make that clear to your would be potential dates. Give them the old pre-date call and let her know they are in no way special, should be given no special treatment whatsoever in this gender equality world you are convinced we live in, and that you expect her to pay for both of you. In fact, don't forget to mention how enslaved you feel being a man and the heavy financial burdens life has placed on your gender. Go ahead, I'll wait.

[SilenRose]

Ahaha! <3

[sluggognatface]

The next generation of women are so spoiled having such an abundance of whiny broke men.

[dudeman]

i guess thats why guys just invite women to their house now.

[lexythelou22]

If he proposed the date, then yes he should pay. If she proposes the date then she should pay. A guy can't just walk up to a girl and be like "I'm going to INVITE you on a date and you get to pay it all, deal?" And the same the other way around. It has nothing to do with wages in my opinion, it's common courtesy. I also don't think you should split it, because what's the point of going on a date if you have to pay for something that wasn't your idea? If she asks you first then by all means tell her if you go she needs to pay, but if YOU ask HER out then pull this wage information up then no, just don't go on the date in the first place if you can't pay for the thing you willingly invite her to do with you.

[nicole_SOA]

Okay i agree women are equal, men aren't less, hell I'd refuse to be paid for. I can do it myself. But what youare talking about is a SMALL part of the big picture. Women make less. We still are the "lesser person" for a lot of things, although with men there are some things that have been pushed too far. Men paying for everything as one thing. I think total equality isn't ever possible. But I do think, or hope its starting to even out, its just a little push and shove in some places as for how men are being treated and such. But I agree women can pay for themselves. it's pathetic if they expect men to pay for everything.

[Asker]

Did you not read that women in their 20s and even 30s earn more in the West? In some places the reverse wage gap is so much as 20%

And this is only INCREASING. Men are getting left behind, we should NOT be paying for women

[Asker]

It is COMPLETELY POSSIBLE for a woman to pay her own on a date. Are you a feminazi?

[nicole_SOA]

I read it love, I don't agree with your facts in pay. Maybe in some businesses. But I don't work a woman's job, no woman who stands of significance to me works a womans job and we get paid significantly less. Although i disagree with that portion, I do agree. Women can pay for themselves. It upsets me that I get payed less but I can buy my own meal and my own shit. I think it's absurd that some women expect everything to be payed for by the man. I refuse for a man to pay for anything of mine. I'm a grown woman I can do it myself.

[Asker]

No I'm talking about in general and this trend has been around since 2008. Get your FACTS straight

[Asker]

Its absurd to expect ANYTHING BUT 50-50

[nicole_SOA]

Oh my god. I'm agreeing with on everything but pay. If someone would show me multiple pieces of evidence I'd gladly agree with you. But from my point of view from what I see and all I've ever seen my whole life is women get payed less.

[nicole_SOA]

Okay, tell me what you think I am, I am going by my experience.

[nicole_SOA]

Oh lord help you poor soul. I agree with you to a certain extent god forbid I don't agree with you and submit to your opinion. Yes in SOME areas and sections of the usa and other parts of the world women make more but from all I've ever seen is that men are treated superior. Do I agree with that no, i suport 50/50. But it is not equal everywhere. Coming from a daughter of a single mother who raised her children, one of which autistic chid on her own, over worked her whole life and had a high ranking only to be payed less than 50% of men in her position are payed? It kinda effects how I see it. Expecially now that I face the same problem with my pay.

[Asker]

there is no "to a certain extent" it is only YES or NO

Men should be treated as EQUALS

[nicole_SOA]

And you are not but neither are we. And we never have been.

[Mekkalyn]

I'll believe it when you support your dumb stats with actual evidence.
Where are you pulling these numbers from?

[nicole_SOA]

@Mekkalyn thats what I'm saying. all you got to do is show me. Prove it to me with multiple sources and provide sound evidence and I would gladly take back what I said and agrer with him.

[nicole_SOA]

Agree*

[ihatethiswebsite]

Women only make less because they choose career fields that pay less than others. That's essentially the only reason.

[kaylaS91]

There shouldn't be a rule that either gender 'has' to pay. Maybe the guy should pay on the first date just to uphold tradition. After that though, going dutch is something I'm totally cool with, and what I do with my boyfriend. We both pay for ourself 99% of the time. Sometimes one of us will treat the other or on our birthday's, we'll treat the birthday person to a meal.

Other than that, the gender equality extends to who pays. We both have similar expenses and income so I see no reason why I have to be financially dependent on him for food when I'm just as capable!

[Asker]

50-50 pay for yourself

[kaylaS91]

yeah in a nutshell. If we go out for no reason like this past weekend, we pay for ourselves. He'll only pay for me on special occasions, as I pay for him on his birthday or something like that.

[pr3ttybr0wn]

I'm not just a woman, I'm a lady. I can't force a guy to pay for my date, but I know there wouldn't be a second one if he didn't. I'm not into the whole gender neutral type of guy who makes these kinds of arguments, we just aren't compatible. I prefer traditional masculine types who just already know to pay for the date.

[pr3ttybr0wn]

that's not what that means, but okay

[Mekkalyn]

Everyone has their own opinion, don't call her a feminazi because you don't agree with hers.

It is traditional for a guy to pay.
Those women should use their money on their guy, too, but in different ways. It's not okay for women to hoard their money while their date constantly is giving, giving, giving.

I think it's romantic for the guy to pay, personally. But, like I said, I'd help in other ways.

[ThisDudeHere]

I agree. The only instance where I would pay is if I went out of my way to invite her. I mean, it could be that I invited her at at time when she had no money to spare but I had and I really wanted to go out with her. That's the only case when I'd pay - if I invited. But if we have been talking/chatting for a while and the thought of a date comes up, it should be 50/50. Always.
The only instances after that where one pays for the other is long down the road when you two have been together for quite some time and neither would object to paying for the other if the situation arised. My mom and dad are like that - each time our family goes to a restaurant my parents do not even talk about who HAS to pay or who SHOULD pay. They simply ask each other who has more money at the moment and the person who does, pays. Last time it was my dad. The time before that it was my mom because dad had paied for the car so he had less.

[Asker]

Yeah pretty much women never approach and force us to ask them out, thus we have to pay on the first one in most cases.

But other than that. It should be completely equal. However, as you can probably tell from the responses, equality for men is still a dream as women and their trained army continue oppression.

[ThisDudeHere]

You do have a point there.

[BuchitaBuchys]

I think whoever asks, pays. Of course the other person should offer. I'd say go Dutch because men are crying about this wayyyyy too much. Like calm down. We went to get ice cream, not a 5star restaurant with valet parking.
And we are making our own money. I don't mind paying for my own or paying his share even.

[Asker]

Most dates are way more than ice-creams... Men are not crying about waaaayyy too much, more like men are wayyy too oppressed and discriminated against based on their gender

[BuchitaBuchys]

That's a bit of a stretch. But I do think men face disadvantages yes.

[Asker]

It's not a stretch when men are paying 95% of dates

[BuchitaBuchys]

Who is forcing these men?

[Asker]

1. Men have been indoctrinated by their mothers/feminist society to worship women
2. Women actively seek men with money, and won't sleep with someone if he's not giving her status, money or a body

[BuchitaBuchys]

1. Teaching to respect a lady is not the same as worshipping her.
2. Stop going for these women. If it bothers you that much. You're not obligated to cave.

[Mekkalyn]

Omg, Asker, you act like women are so freaking evil.

Most women do not actively seek men with a lot of money, and will sleep with them even if they aren't giving her stats, money, or a body.

And women do not asked to be worshiped, they demand respect.

Stop judging from a tiny pool and look at the bigger picture.

[BellePepper]

@Mekkalyn *whispers* he's trolling

[Melirain]

Personally, I prefer to go dutch, and the idea of having a guy pay for everything makes me a little uncomfortable. I do think it's a nice gesture when the guy occasionally offers to pay for small things, like if we grab ice cream after the meal. But, I want our relationship to even out in the end and be fairly equal, so if he pays for some things, then I'll want to buy, make, or bring him something in return, or occasionally pick up the check myself.

[Asker]

equality ftw!

[Outofthegrey]

I'm reading some of these responses, and I have to say, a lot of these women here think they're "worth it" for no quantifiable reason. If you EVER state that you are worth it, you need to excuse yourself from the conversation and work on proving that. Man, what happened to humility?

[Beautifiedgirl123]

I believe in paying for yourself but sometimes I think it makes the other person feel special or appreciated if the person asking them is paying. It's just an appreciating act. It doesn't matter whether that person is a guy or a girl. Other then that I do reckon you should pay for yourself

[Asker]

Women expect to be made to feel special 99% of the time

[Asker]

Which is outright discrimination based on sex against men and expecting special treatment based on sex

[Beautifiedgirl123]

I'll be more than happy to make my guy feel special and pay for him. I said it is based on who asked who, it has nothing to do with gender. If I suggested we go out to a restaurant then I'd pay because I asked. No gender involved. And no women don't expect to be made to feel special 99% of the time. I don't expect it at all. My guy will feel as special as I feel. I don't deserve special treatment because of my gender and neither does he. I don't see anything wrong in doing something special every once in a while for someone you love though and that also has nothing to do with gender

[Mekkalyn]

You act like there's something wrong with feeling special 100% of the time.
both people in the relationship should feel that way or something is wrong.

[Beautifiedgirl123]

@Mekkalyn wait who are you talking about? I'm so lost

[Mekkalyn]

Asker who said "women expect to be made to feel special 99% of the time"

In a relationship, you BOTH should feel special 99% of the time.

[Beautifiedgirl123]

@Mekkalyn oh ok, gotcha!

[Asker]

50-50

[Mekkalyn]

100-100
Both should feel special 100% of the time.
You can't argue with that, Asker.

[Asker]

I'm talking about payment. All that emotional bullshit can happen later...

50-50 split the bill. Support EQUALITY

[Beautifiedgirl123]

@Mekkalyn don't bother, I don't think he'll ever get it

[Asker]

Don't expect special treatment in this day and age of EQUALITY.

[Beautifiedgirl123]

Asked clearly you didn't read anything I wrote so I'm just not gonna bother

[Asker]

"I think it makes the other person feel special or appreciated if the person asking them is paying."

You can only ask to be made special 50% of the time. Stop oppressing men!!

[Beautifiedgirl123]

I didn't say all the time. I said I think it's best to pay for yourself but on a special occasion it would be nice if the person asking is paying because it makes us feel appreciated. I then went on to say that if I asked, I would damn pay. Therefore not oppressing men. Read don't just take one snippet of my comment and then twist it to your liking

[Mekkalyn]

Honestly, this guy is really ignorant and only sees what he wants to see and doesn't look at logical points.
He can't see outside of his own jaded perspective to see that not everything is cut and dry.

[Beautifiedgirl123]

@Mekkalyn exactly! He's gone around doing the same thing to pretty much all the comments made by women. No bother trying to get some sense into him

[Mekkalyn]

I can see some of his points being valid, but this thread is full of exaggerations and things been blown way, way, way, out of proportion.

This whole thread is about how because guys pay for dates that's it's OPPRESSION. Really? Do they even know what that word means? Slaves were oppressed. Women (before they had any rights at all) were oppressed (but we are not anymore, by any means). But men are oppressed because they pay for dates? Like really?

And then spin all women comments (even when they are agreeing at some points, about 50-50) into some "I hate women and everyone is against me and wants to oppress me, oh woes me". I just can't take someone like that seriously lmao

[Beautifiedgirl123]

@Mekkalyn well said!

[Asker]

You shouldn't expect to be paid for and made to feel special just because you're a woman.

50-50

[Beautifiedgirl123]

Ok stop, I never said about being made special cause we're women. Did you miss the spot where I said I'd pay to make the guy feel special. Get it in your head or stop commenting but don't do both it looks ridiculous and makes you sound stupid. I said and for the last time, If I asked the guy, I'd pay. I've repeated this like 3-4 times and yet you seem to miss it and say something which I haven't even mentioned before

[Asker]

I'm not even reading 10% of what you're saying

[Asker]

Your original post was enough, and there are no excuses for it

[Beautifiedgirl123]

Exactly so please shut up

[Mekkalyn]

I really, really, have no words about his clueless-ness and how frustrating it is to hear.

But hey, at least he admitted to only reading 10% of what you are saying.
Shows that he really cares about a conversation.

No, all he cares about is spouting his garbage rants lol

[Asker]

Hey! That's offensive!!

Both of you :P

[Asker]

Of course, I expect you to call equality "garbage"

[Beautifiedgirl123]

And I expect you to read my responses but we don't always get what we want

[Asker]

Wow that was just pathetic. Labelling a call for equality "garbage" is just sick.

Women are one of the main reasons why men don't have rights.

[Beautifiedgirl123]

Go ahead and prove where I once called equality "garbage"

Stop pulling shit out of your ass

[Asker]

The other female

[Beautifiedgirl123]

She wasn't refering to men being oppressed as garbage. She was referring to you choosing to read what you want and and ignoring other parts as garbage

[Asker]

LOL learn to read.

She was referring to my calls for equality as "garbage" "rants"... Both highly derogatory terms. But I expect nothing less from the oppressors... Carry on then, I'm merely pleading with you to stop using men as slaves

[Beautifiedgirl123]

Isn't that rude that you said you're pleading with me to stop using men as slaves.

Because how do you know I do that. That's disrespectful

[Asker]

"I think it makes the other person feel special or appreciated if the person asking them is paying."

You can only ask to be made special 50% of the time. Otherwise its oppression. And lets be honest, you DON'T make guys feel special even a quarter of the time and you probably don't pay on dates as well. You're just talking shit

[Beautifiedgirl123]

How do you know?

No like seriously if you're gonna talk bull about me then tell me. You seem so sure of yourself and with what... absolutely nothing.

You've got no facts and no Info to prove what type of person I am so please for fuck sake take your head out of your ass and do something productive.

[Asker]

C'mon lets be honest honey bun

[Beautifiedgirl123]

Yea let's...

So why are you really asking this question?

You cannot honestly be pissed about something like this. You make it sound like people are dying.

[Leraleira]

Of course the man shouldn't pay if he doesn't want to. It's his decision if he wants to pay or not... Just like it's my decision to not go out with him again if he doesn't pay. If he doesn't then he's not the type of guy I'm looking for. I want a romantic gentleman, a real man, not a whiny, cheap little boy who thinks everything is so unfair.

[RationalLioness]

Your question is biased. Whoever asks should pay. Simple as that. Many women are approaching men, but a lot of guys will never get a date unless if they approach first. If they don't want to keep paying for random women, GET TO KNOW THE WOMAN A LITTLE FIRST TO SEE IF YOU'RE COMPATIBLE. Then ask. Pretty simple.

I want to see evidence of the reverse wage gap because I call BS.

[dudeman]

there is a lot of evidence out there. the wage gap was done thirty years ago now women make more money because they get nice government jobs that overpay them.

[RationalLioness]

The only evidence that is out there is the fact that women in certain occupations are paid less than their male counterparts.

There is NO evidence for women being paid more than men in the same job (not in America).

[Hidden_P]

Let me be clear.
I always offer to pay. Even if it will land me in more debt.

But. I try to make it clear that I really can't afford it before we go. Not me trying to be greedy but being an apprentice is a bit shit (Y).

My boyfriend handled it perfectly. Dinner at home and South Park on TV.

But, I would ALWAYS try to pay my way, but if someone knew how much I was struggling and insisted on the date, I would expect they paid. The exact same way if it was the other way around.

[Hidden_P]

Me and my boyfriend have been together for so long we pay for each others things all the time, we don't even keep track. It's simply a "oh you have the money today?". But before you kick off that omg I'm abusing him, I'ved moved him into my house so he can save for his own house.

I think less point scoring should be involved and just go with what someone can afford. If someone offers to pay for both for a night out, go for it. Don't offer if you can't afford both because you don't know what the other is going through. Likewise, I think a woman should always try and offer.

[samhradh_leannan]

I think it's nice when the guy pays for a date, BUT I pay for them just as often. I want things to even out in the end, but I prefer to trade off paying rather than going dutch. I find it more romantic that way. We each get to be treated some of the time.

[JessikaSky]

I think maybe who ever asks who on the date should pay, isn't that the idea? You ask someone to dinner so generally that means you foot the bill, if you can't afford to then don't ask for a date, go somewhere cheaper or ask if it's okay to split the bill. It's not rocket since really.

[OrdinaryGentleman]

I chose "Disagree, women are special creatures" but to all the girls who chose this... go screw yourself with a cactus. I am a guy and I am happy to take care of my girl but when women begin to expect things just because they are a woman it is a turn off. I don't take care of a girl because i feel obligated to but because I want to, if she does the same thing than that is precious and I would be happy with that relationship. That is what love should be.

[Anonymous]

Never say never, like if you want to take her out on her birthday (I would pay for my boyfriend's meal on his birthday). But usually yes, I prefer to pay for myself, and he can pay for himself. I used to live in Atlanta (outside of it, in Marietta), some guys made more money than me but I never asked them to pay, and didn't accept gifts from them.

[Asker]

Dates not birthdays

[Opinion Owner]

Oh. Well for me, going out to a nice restaurant on either's bday is a date to me.

[Asker]

no that's a birthday celebration not a DATE

[Opinion Owner]

I consider it a date, but to each their own. That's not the point of your question. My response still stands that I like to split the bill and pay for myself on all dates except birthdays.

[Asker]

Those aren't dates, they are celebrations. Similarly festivals aren't dates

[Opinion Owner]

That is how you see them, thank you for explaining that further.

[Asker]

Women make truth seem like lies, and lies seem like truth.

[Opinion Owner]

Some probably do.

[Anonymous]

I agree. Choose something simple and split for the first few dates like coffee, a beer, a cheap dinner so you two can focus on getting to know each other. Then, take turns or whatever else works (like not going out as much, having the person wanting to do a special activity pay, having one get groceries and the other drinks, etc) once you're an established couple.

[Asker]

All this is debatable, but we must have EQUALITY

[Opinion Owner]

Works for me. It takes away the pressure of the paying person to impress and the nonpaying person feeling obligated, too.

[Anonymous]

I'm a little offended when you say all women. That makes it completely bias. I'm a women and when i date men I pay for dates. Especially when invite them out. but for some reason they try to pay for everything after i said i would pay for them. This a progressive world, what's up with this wanna prove man slave theory. If u don't wanna pay for dates buy a hooker. or stick to porn and ur hands

[Opinion Owner]

That's weird cause i am almost certain in the 50-80s men would waltz women around and make us look like trophies to let society know they could afford to live comfort life, have a "nice ass" to bang, and they husband would pay for their things so the wives would brag about their stuff... you know assert their dominance over everything, even in medieval times too, before america and before women's rights, before we were allowed to work. Men have always been told by their fathers that a man isn't a man unless he can provide for his family. I never grew up with a mom. and funny thig is my dad has always told m let the man pay it's his job, and told my brother it's his job. So stop blaming women, for having expectations that have been pushed down on society even before you were even a sperm cell swimming in your dad nut sack

[Asker]

Nonsense. This whole "being a man" thing has only come up since women's liberation. And now its a bigger thing than ever, since women are the most free. The men in their 50s and above are part of the generation that was brainwashed to support equality and practice female supremacy.

Women are the ones constantly asserting dominance and men are relegated submissive status in western civilization. Men are BY LAW and social standards, second class citizens

[Opinion Owner]

also my answer was pay equal pay dip shit so stop picking on me and go comment on some other person who answered women are special.

[Asker]

Yes men should have equal pay as well, but that's going off topic.

If I called you a bitch it would be removed, but you can call me dipshit anytime, anyplace, anywhere... This is oppression

[Opinion Owner]

not even when you look at animals and how they interact it's always male vs male, they fight for food and even do the protecting during sex, and try to impress they're female counter part with a mating call and dance etc./ when it's female vs female we are fighting for the man who can provide more. IT not just society, its also evolution. I agree men shouldn't have to pay. it should be straight up 50/50 and they do probably try to pay to into my pants but im not gonna fuck them just cause they can throw down money. probably someone close minded and easy. your just you and ur dogma trying to get people to agree to such radical things. if u don't wanna pay for shit be up front about it with a chick and get to know each other's views or else ur gonna spend hours on the internet yelling at people. which would probably means ruining sex for urself. You are radical, you dont even try to come to agreement and put people down when they do agree with you.

[Opinion Owner]

yes, i called u a dip shit, because you called me a bitch. why wouldn't i? it's not oppressive, no one is shunning u. It's equality an eye for an eye. you ask for opinions form both sex yet u disagree and call me names? that is pretty uncivil because i know i made it pretty apparent that pay should be 50-50 and agreed with u. yet you call me manipulative when i give u a straight answer. Your fighting is bias and u say im wrong because they are trying to sleep with me. Even though i bluntly tell people i won't sleep with even if they pay for me. ur like those religious people who ask about someone believes and tries to tell them they're wrong for being atheist or being polytheistic. that is oppression like a totalitarian dictator forcing ur believes not trying to even come to an agreement.

[Asker]

False accusation is false... as fuck

[Opinion Owner]

LOLZ dude this is stupid ur obviously just doing this out of pure boredom or whever, u keep picking fights with everyone even if they do say 50-50 pay. talking to u may have actually killed some brain cells i'm done

[Asker]

I just hope you don't falsely accuse a man of something more serious...

[BreatheMe19]

I think everyone can do what they want, k?

Personally I think splitting the bill is the best way to do things.

[Asker]

So women can oppress men?

[BreatheMe19]

Right, that's exactly what I said.

[Asker]

Yeah women need to stop expecting to be paid for and go 50-50

[BreatheMe19]

K bye bye, avere una buona notte, il sole.

[Asker]

Stop oppressing men!! This goes against EQUALITY

[Entereality]

If the relationship is from genuine love, it doesn't matter as much who pays. Just an opinion of course.

[Asker]

Most dates don't lead to relationships, most relationships fail badly, half of all marriages end in divorce & the vast majority of marriages are unhappy.

true love is BS for the movies. Men should be EQUAL

[Entereality]

I feel that this post is justified and I've been sore about unfairness too. By observing myself and my past mistakes (and being an introvert), I find that problems go a bit deeper than just my bank account. I've gotten into relationships for not the best of reasons. I was letting my insecurity guide me and I thought it was better than being alone.

This doesn't mean I will or won't find a true love in the future, but the needs are less and less, the more I love myself.

[Entereality]

On a different note, my last 2 girlfriends were more generous than myself...

[Poppykate]

Let's be done with this argument and go 50/50. I think that if it is coffee, it is a nice/ kind gesture on behalf of whoever ask for the date, to pay. It costs a total of $10 tops, and it shows to the other person that you enjoyed their company.

[Anonymous]

Ah, you again. :)

And I don't think you should never pay, you could offer to split the bill, or if you just wanted to be kind to her, you could pay. If my boyfriend didn't have the money, I would totally pay for his meal. he and I went on a date once, and he insisted that he would pay for me. I felt bad so I offered to split the bill with him evenly, and that is what we did. I didn't want to make him pay for me, and I felt bad. I love him too much. ❤️

[Opinion Owner]

Wow I didn't even say anything oppressive lol I said I would pay for his meal tf

[Jmarx]

I'll usually make the first date something free or inexpensive like going to an art museum or walk through the park. If that's not to their liking because it's not expensive then there will definitely not be a second daten

[lePoivre]

I think that if you want to pay for your date, you should pay for your date. But if you don't want to or can't afford to, it shouldn't be a big deal.

[Asker]

It shouldn't even exist. Why should men pay for women, and women not pay for men?

[nicole_SOA]

Sometimes we do. So gets your facts straight (;
Because hunny I'm one of the girls that has and will.

[nicole_SOA]

I completely agree with you @lePoivre

[apple24]

@nicole_SOA @asker stop playing the victim!!!

[apple24]

he block me!! Just wow!

[apple24]

this is why i don't allow anon in my question you troll!

[apple24]

I am not opressing you! How can you compare me to what you think is true!! I am a human@asker

[lePoivre]

Asker, dude, my response was regardless of gender.

[tenchu11]

Not about showing equality it's about trying to show her how much you care about her.

[Asker]

So she's not expected to show how much she cares for you? That isn't gender equality... its female supremacy

[tenchu11]

Maybe by agreeing to see you she shows she cares. Dressing up and looking nice

[Asker]

So we do the EXACT SAME THING and so it evens out... Plus women always dress up...

Are you seriously hearing yourself right now? You're saying that it should be EQUAL

[tenchu11]

Woman can be equals just the pride of showing her I care. Nothing about equality

[Asker]

So women shouldn't show how much they care? Men don't deserve to be paid for or at least be equal?

Dude you're being a feminazi, by discriminating based on sex

[523206720]

Of course you should pay for her. She is the future mother of your children. I would never date a guy who refuses to pay for me. That is just trashy.

[Asker]

Maternity leave for 1 year.

... but our ENTIRE LIVES except that 1 year? WOW... WE ARE EQUALS aside from maternity!! Women get educated and work. They earn well. Men are becoming the POORER sex... why on earth should we pay in a gender equal society? It's EQUALITY.

You're just an oppressive woman

[larry69]

Exactly. Great answer and I always pay.

[SilenRose]

@Asker is the type of guy to knock a women up and leave her alone to take care of the baby and complain whenever she asks him for money to take care of THEIR child.

[katrinabowring]

It really all depends on who asked who. If I went up to a guy and asked him on a date then I would 100% expect to pay the check myself. But after that its whoever gets the check first or who made the plans [for example I asked out on the first (I pay) he made plans for dinner the next week (he pays) I decide to go to the movies after (i pay)]

[Anonymous]

"NEVER PAY for a woman on a DATE. Do you agree?"

No, I do not agree. The same way I may want to pay for him on a date.
Rules are boring, extremism is just stupid.
There are no suitable options on your biased poll.

[Asker]

Stop expecting men to pay on dates for you just because they are men. That's discrimination based on sex...

If you want to pay for him FINE but you should be paying for him an equal number of times. The same number he pays for you

[Opinion Owner]

He doesn't want me to because he knows his salary is much higher than mine and we wouldn't be going out this many times if I had to pay for it all.
Still I was paying my own share when we were still not official.

When did I say i expect men to pay for me? I'm way too independent which, by the way, as a woman is not a good thing. But I rarely dated random people anyway.

[Asker]

Oh so you use HIS MONEY and are ok with CONTINUOUSLY treating him like cash machine.. you can't afford your own food & drink? That's pathetic.

[Opinion Owner]

I think you just sounded more pathetic than I could ever be even if I tried.

So what if he pays for some meals? It's not like he's taking me to fancy restaurants, buying me brand stuff or diamonds. I cook dinner for him and do a lot of other things money can't buy.
It's called liking each other, which you obviously haven't experienced yet.

[serious]

I think MEN and WOMEN both can pay for the date, if they want too, or if either one of them wants to pay.

[Asker]

Yes but the expectation that men need to pay, simply because they're men needs to stop. It should be 50-50. Often girls force men to pay indirectly, by insinuating that they'll refuse to sleep with men if they don't shell out cash

[serious]

Yes, you're right. That's perfect, well said.

[9mfeo]

I really hate when men pay for me on dates. It makes me feel like they think I now owe them something, and I don't like that feeling.

[SilenRose]

Then don't let them if you feel like that. Pick up their cash or card and throw it back at them and throw down yours.

[Eternallylucky]

If you are broke, don't force yourself to go on a date. If you are stingy, you might as well just at watch Netflix at home with your pet.

[Kira88]

I always pay for myself, otherwise it's assumed I'd want to sleep with them because they paid for a meal. I'm not a prostitute.

[apple24]

Disagree, women are special creatures! I am special! Why don't you like my gender?

[apple24]

hahah lol I like equality I am just pulling your leg!

[apple24]

haha what? calm down apple bitter bottoms!

[DamnCurtis]

I'll pay for you every time.

[apple24]

@DamnCurtis am I your favorite gager? hahah!

[DamnCurtis]

You wish.

[Asker]

Oppressed men are now going to be ridiculed and called bitter...

in a society that claims to support EQUALITY? This is the problem with feminsm

[Asker]

DamnCurtis stop being a slave and supporting oppression

[apple24]

So mean!!! @DamnCurtis I didn't now I was a nazit? @asker hahah just because women want to be equal to men you get mad! I suggest you calm the fuck down! I will pay your damn dinner! I will support you!! I will buy you a car!

[Asker]

You are the oppressor..

[Asker]

be gone!

[Maxemeister]

No I do not agree. Fights over who pays the check r so much fun!

[Asker]

lol yeah true dat!!

[I_Own_You]

lol Atlanta. I have theories. Black girls go to school and black guys don't give a fuck? hahaha

Seriously, girls who get paid a lot are usually not ones you want to bang anyway. Who cares.

[Asker]

So when men ask for equality and point out how unequal things are... people are supposed to laugh? And say WHO CARES?

This is why men aren't equal in the first place. Don't lie, if you've ever dated, you'd be getting the shorter end of the stick overall. So either you're a WILLING SLAVE or you've never dated. Either way you sound like an ENEMY OF EQUALITY

[I_Own_You]

hahahahaha

[Asker]

Yeah keep being a slave...

[I_Own_You]

ur going to hell.

[I_Own_You]

I only ever support my own supremacy. I don't give a fuck what gender you are.

[Kari22]

If this "equality" thing continues, I'll have to move to Russia.

[Anonymous]

Women won't secretly say this but if you aren't paying for most of the shit they'll drop your ass after a couple of date then they'll say it just didn't work out due to lack of "chemistry'".

[rjroy3]

Unless she's your girlfriend you should not be paying for her.

[Asker]

So you should become your girlfriend's slave or should it be 50-50 with her as well like it would be in an EQUAL relationship?

[rjroy3]

Think about it

[Asker]

Obviously the second for me, but I'm not so sure about you... if your girlfriend is your equal she would be treated like an EQUAL

[rjroy3]

Well when you open with a loaded question I feel the need to tell you to think about it.

The options are not only A. Girlfriends slave or B. Split everything 50/50.

Yes, I see her as an equal but I also don't nitpick and get on he case for not paying exactly $25 on a $50 check. I'm fine covering it. She most often jumps in to try and pay for all of it, but when I cover it she'll jump in to cover the tip.

Date a girl of substance and this topic won't be an issue. That's also why I said, unless she's your girlfriend don't pay for her.

[rjroy3]

There's also times she pays for everything

[Asker]

What percentage of times does she pay more than you? >50-55% right?

That means you're still giving into oppression, albeit slightly

[rjroy3]

Don't keep track of it. I couldn't even tell you if I did cover the check most times. It feels like we're taking turns unless one of us has more money than the other at the time. Last day we went out I had $50 cash and the rest on card. She had $500 cash so she covered most of the food we had that day.

But again, you're nitpicking. I don't

[Asker]

Of course you don't because you know I'm right

[Asker]

She wouldn't be with you, if you weren't getting the shorter end of the stick

[rjroy3]

Sure

[TheWorldEndsWithYou]

I agree, but when it comes down to it. My mother told me I had to pay when I went on dates, I guess I just got used to it... 😅

[TheWorldEndsWithYou]

No it's just how much my dad loves my mom. I think you're just looking too much into it

[Asker]

So your mom doesn't love your dad equally? LOL

And BESIDES THAT we're a whole different generation, where women are doing better.

[TheWorldEndsWithYou]

You took what I said out of context 🙄 I don't pay all the time, I don't mind paying at times.

[Asker]

So women should be paying for you an equal or similar number of times... Unless you're a feminist who pedastalizes women. And your mom is totally excused for not "loving'' your dad as much

[jacquesvol]

Guy pays on the first date, girl on the second, guy on the third.

[Anonymous]

Whomever invites pays, I will stick to that. If he invites me on a date, he will pay. If I invite him or a group of five I will pay. It's not about gender roles, it's about common courtesy.

[Nick_D]

I would never let a lady pay on a date with me, I just could not bring myself to allow her to pay for anything. It never happened before and I doubt it will ever happen.

[Kira88]

It's okay to pay because it shows we're strong and capable. It's possible to be that and feminine at the same time. You're cute though so I'm sure a girl will ask you on a date and pay for herself one day.

[Nick_D]

@Kira88 well, I don't date a woman because she is strong and capable but because I like her or fancy her and paying on a date is the least thing I can do.

[ihatethiswebsite]

I don't care what others do but I personally wouldn't pay for the date. I would rather have each of us pay for what we got.

[Asker]

This is equality. Congrats for not being a slave or supporting male-slavery

[Entity]

Males pay for dates specifically to show economic power. This is probably something poorer males face. Historically it has nothing to do with earnings of who you are trying to woo but instead impressing them with your ability to afford things.

[Asker]

You're basically saying men SHOULD be richer than women... and that men SHOULD have to pay for dates... that men SHOULD have enough money to support women.

looks like you didn't read the description. WAKE UP

[Entity]

Actually I just know a little history. -shrug-

[Asker]

LOL so if we're going to do everything as per history...

Let's stop sending girls to school and close all job opportunities for females. Lets give women no rights. And lets take dowry, condone wife beating and allow men to lock women up in the house. Lets all cover women's heads and ban them from public spaces OK?

WTF are you smoking dude?

[Asker]

All women have been forcefully married off, they are to be given by their fathers to a suitable guy and have no say in the matter.

Dating & impressing women is a feminist thing... what you're saying goes against GENDER EQUALITY... don't men deserve equality? Should we officially be recognized as second class citizens?

[Entity]

If what you say is true dating and making women is actually the opposite of feminism.

Using women for economic gain is not equality. It's pure subordination. "Marrying them off" is usage of property.

But times have changed. This hasn't been the case for at least a century in the modern world.

The basis of marriage, love and all that, has been commercialized though. You wouldn't pay for a date but how hesitant are you to buy a diamond ring for your sweety?

Surely you'll demand one in kind?

Why isn't anyone proposing to you anyway?

Why even date unless you are allied at all?

Half- morals. That's why. A generation of convenience.

[Asker]

WRONG I'm saying we should pay for ourselves, and make it 50-50 so that its EQUAL. What you're saying is sexist and is like the opposite of the patriarchy.

Men are not slaves. Don't be an enemy of EQUALITY because that is where our society wants to go... and has been trying, but only for women, causing them to become superior and creating PEOPLE LIKE YOU

[Asker]

No wonder marriage is on the decline, because it isn't about LOVE and all that bullshit. It is a slave trade.

The "modern world" claims to be about equality and "modern society" supports equality, so that's what it should be. Not a matriarchy!!

[Asker]

And women's sexual liberation only came in the 1960s so your data of the "past century" is ABSOLUTELY WRONG

[Entity]

I dont know where you learned the word matriarchy but you're misusing it. Modern marriage is still patriarchial. Modern divorce however is matriarchial.

Women are sadly only the winners when things dissolve. Women were able to vote 40 years prior in the U. S. to 1960. Extremely common knowledge.

Even earlier in other places in the world. By hundreds of years at times.

[Entity]

The sexual revolution was in 1980 by the way in the U. S. 20 years after your declared date. So... I'm not sure what happened too you but...

[Asker]

Well technically there have been no matriarchies, so its not even a thing. BUT we could be the first with people like you!!

Women extract tons of things using dating, marriage & relationships WTF are you smoking? There is a massive amount of data on how women spend money on themselves... and actually they spend 90% MORE MONEY THAN THEY EARN.

The patriarchy is dead. Women are allowed to leave the house and talk back. Many women nag their husbands to death. Stop spreading LIES. Modern marriage is matriarchal too, the man is supposed to get down on his knees and propose... buy the ring... provide for the bitch while she sits at home being an EQUAL lol. What a fucking joke

[Entity]

The world has had matriarchial societies...

Man this is no fun. Just save some scratch and use a coupon.

[Asker]

You support widespread abuse of men as cash machines... and say a call for equality is NO FUN? Wake up, you're a trained slave.

Most anthropologists hold that there are no known societies that are unambiguously matriarchal

[Entity]

Of the two of us there is only one enslaved by zealotry. My not supporting you doesn't mean anything of the sort. I only fear your fanaticism is not an isolated case; sensational and increasingly unstable puerile are becoming more powerful due to a bored global theater.

This is truly concerning.

[Kira88]

You, you are awesome. Pat yourself on the back for being direct and informative in your opinion. I agree completely with what you're saying.

[Anonymous]

That's good advice for guys who want to have the chronic problem of a lack of a second date, or only dates with feminists.

[Words_and_Wisdom]

Never on the first date at least. If I'm comfortable enough with her I might pay for the 2nd or 3rd date.

[Hezigrimm]

Wait if we are equals why would we never pay. That implies that we are the superior ones.

[ClumsyAngel]

I feel bad if someone pays for me, I'd insist on paying myself

[Anonymous]

I voted A, but I meant to vote C.

Women are just not worth it. Look at all the responses here. It's much better to be single, than with a free and equal woman.

Women won't get a fucking dime from me!!

[Anonymous]

I could not pick from your childishly pretentious poll but I pay on the dates I go on. I do like your pretend wage gap data though.

[lasmujeressonguapas]

fck atlanta. as southereneres are backward, they don't have equality morals anyhow.

[DodgersGM]

Your poll options are interesting. LOL

[Asker]

look at all the brainwashed feminazi men LOL

[sjoes006]

Wow asker you seem to be the one with feelings of entitlement. You seem to think you are entitled to a woman's company but from the sound of it no amount of money would make me suffer your company. 😕

[SilenRose]

Another broke man complaining.

[larry69]

Always pay for a women. Women should never pay.

[Asker]

Another brainwashed male feminazi... This is against EQUALITY of the sexes, and the kind of thinking that has relegated men to mere second class citizens

[larry69]

No. In yhe 70s and 80s men were taught always pay

[Asker]

Because that time women had just been liberated and were not fully equal...

And actually it is because of this 1970s gynocentric mindset that women have gained social supremacy. Did you forget that dating is a feminist arrangement?

[larry69]

I was just stating my opinion. Women pay a lot to be beautiful.

[Asker]

Which they admit is mostly for female-competition, not for men.

Your kind of thinking belongs in the 1970s and 80s, it has no place in modern society... not just because of equality, but because of all the social changes that have taken place and men are now oppressed, 2nd class citizens of western civilization

[larry69]

Exactlt because men abused women. Yes its a womans workd and life is not fair

[Asker]

Exactly what? I never said anything in line with what you did. LOL... anyway...

It's a woman's world? Life is not fair? Dude you're being sexist against your own gender. Do you realize how brainwashed you are?

Men should not be discriminated against based on sex, because that goes against EQUALITY. You are an ENEMY OF EQUALITY

[Jessicocoa]

Yeah, I think it's best to just go dutch.

[Asker]

dutch?

[Jessicocoa]

It means that everyone pays for themselves.

[Asker]

Yeah equality ftw!!

[Azara]

Yes, I Agree.