Why is it more acceptable for women to be gay/bi but not for men?

Question

I've just always wondered why it's like this. For example, if a woman says she's bisexual/gay she's much more likely to get a positive reaction but if a man says he's bisexual/gay he's most likely going to get a negative reaction.

SomeGuy37 · Accepted Answer

Personally, I don't care, and you can do what you want, with who you want, but don't flaunt it, and make a scene about it.
I think the big issue for most with male gay/bi, is the still lingering taboo of anal sex. When someone says a guy is gay, what do most people naturally think as their first thought: anal sex.
I don't have issues with that, and if you like it, gay or straight, and your partner is into it, do what you love!!
It's just that there are a lot of people, raised with something like OLD-Fashioned, 'Puritanical' kinds of beliefs, and they judge, and condemn, anyone not like them.
I have gay, lesbian, trans, whatever, kind of friends, and they are just my friends! I don't think about what they do, privately, because I don't care! It isn't my business!! They are my friends, because we like the same kinds of things, like movies, or food, or computer/nerdy things!!
Why does anyone care what someone does, at home, behind closed doors, to relax, or get off?
Maybe Trump likes dressing up in a lacy nightie, and letting his wife spank him for being a 'Naughty Boy' saying all that SHT he says!! Maybe Hilary straps on a toy and takes Bill? WHO CARES?
Social commentary, parody, and protected by the First Amendment, but probably soon to be deleted by the admins!! :)

Cosytoasty · Accepted Answer

Acceptable by whom? Men think lesbians are hot but women think gay couples are adorable.

Men however, control the world and influence perceptions, in the old days through the church and in modern times the media. Hence the seemingly one-sidedness of it.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I think in a way you are right about this. I think men and women have a stigma surrounding them and for men it may be that they are expected to be emotionless or just very very strong and not sensitive at all, show no feelings. Which ties to being "the alpha" and being the strong guy, fearless. And although it is stupid, some may tie being gay as a man to being more femenine. I think that's just a portion though, there is definitely more to it. I think it is definitely more sexualized, girl on girl vs guy on guy so people are more comfortable around the girl on girl idea. It's not as "odd" in their minds. And as a bi woman myself, I still have a lot a lot a lotttt of worries about how people could possibly take in the fact that I am bi, I probably won't come out any time soon. Maybe 10 years! Because people are going to see you differently. Start reffering to you as "the bi one" "oh she likes girls right?" it's gonna feel like that's all people see, and you can't come out of that once you say it. But yeah sorry I sidetracked.

Imbisexual19 · Accepted Answer

My mother reacted awful. She basically said it's gross and I should keep my mouth shut. I had only told 2 people other than my husband before that. I'm not telling anybody else I know now because of her nasty reaction. Most of my family will react this way unfortunately. Most girls that come out get this treatment from family and friends. Guys we aren't related to seem to think it's hot lol guys react poorly to guys who like guys because they're jerks. They think it's fun to pick on someone who's not like them. I am not saying it's true for all men, just a lot. I hate the bad stigma being anything other than straight has.

Sara413 · Accepted Answer

Because women's bodies have always been overly sexualized in our culture, so it's easier for people to accept that a woman might be sexually attracted to female bodies. Straight men seem to have this idea in their heads that male bodies are not sexy so it seems weird to them for anyone, let alone another man, to be sexually attracted to one. They seem to think straight women re not really sexually attracted but it's just a biological imperative or something.

bente2 · Accepted Answer

Because men are expected to be amnly and not show any type of feelings to the world wheras if a woman is 'butch' no one really cares. If a woman is bi men cheer it on.

Honestly most of these things and how people feel about them are controlled by men and their image.

BlueCoyote · Answer

It mostly has to do with men, actually. Just look at people like the GaG user Iron_Man who go around telling everyone how much they hate "faggots" and how "fucking disgusting" gay people supposedly are.
Overall, women are far more relaxed and open-minded about these things and about social progress in general. Many men, sadly, are a bunch of intolerant macho jackasses.

HandsomeRaj · Answer

Awesome question that has a much more deep rooted answer than what people tend to believe in generally.

The answers you beget are those that are based on eons of being made to believe it.

Why it was made acceptable in the almost after caveman era stems from the fact that nature's only motive is expansion through procreation.

1. 2 women having sex even the idea of it turns on a man - nature's way of ensuring procreation (not that there aren't women that get turned on by 2 men doing it but the numbers are far less than the other way round)
2. The man is physically powerful than a woman thus can force himself on her thus get her pregnant
2.1. Those days there was not even a remote idea of abortion leave alone contraception
2.2. Which is why what is considered 'savage' by the modern world - polyamory / community living, used to ensure survival of any offspring
2.3. Thus a lot of ancient civilisations did not even have concept of marriage but believed in one for all all for one
3. Once the 'civilised world' started coming to be, they started slut shaming bi & gay in the name of God & religion. This over eons became a subconscious norm with most

Anonymous · Answer

I wouldn't say it's "more acceptable." All the time bi women are told they are "just seeking attention" or "just going through a phase." Or guys will say bi women are not girlfriend material because they are "more likely to cheat." The only reason there are a lot of straight guys that claim to be okay with bi women but not bi men are because these straight guys sexualize bi women. But that's not actually respecting bi women.

Bi acceptance is definitely an issue, and it's sad that bi men and bi women are not respected. It's sad that many sexualities are not accepted.

Rawrzz · Answer

Probably because it's a lot dirtier to be male and gay. Significantly more risky. It's just a fact. And, wasting semen is probably subconsciously shouting, "you are harming human population growth", (of course, this doesn't make any sense, because that stuff is near infinite) whereas, there is no reproductive waste when it comes to bi chicks.

Our instincts don't know there are 7 billion of us. They still think it's 20,000 years ago. Incidentally, the same reason women get slut shamed. Because it's seen as being irresponsible with their finite eggs. But again, it doesn't make sense, because semen is pretty much infinite... mmmmm

Then, maybe it's just based off religion. In the bible, homosexuality is an "abomination"... for males. Doesn't say shit about females. I would compare it to a society like Japan, without Christianity, which is steeped in a history of culturally accepted homosexuality. Yeah. I'd say it's related to religion.

Ferretman21 · Answer

Men are more sexual, most men are straight or in the closet. If a woman says she's bi-sexual, most men will think 'SWEET THAT'S HOT TWO WOMEN?' If a guy says he is bi-sexual men think that is nasty, feminine, unclean, and lots of other things I'm sure.

Women are less sexual in general and don't really care, so it's natural they won't think the same on the subject as men, but I have seen some women think it's just as nasty. Some women think it's hot, and think similar to a man's way of thinking towards a bi-sexual woman.

In general I think women are just more understanding about it.

falafelany1 · Answer

It's difficult. I have a male friend going through this right now. He has always been attracted to women but in the past few years he has noticed he might also be attracted to men. This is a difficult time for him and he is confused and frustrated trying to figure himself out. All I can do is support him.

Anonymous · Answer

The question here is more about bi men (I think). Gay men and women seem to be accepted equally, though I could be wrong. I think the struggle for bi men stems from straight men are used to seeing women with other women in porn. Therefore, straight men are not weirded out by it. In fact, many of them find it hot and are fine with there SO being bisexual. Most girls, on the other hand, aren't into M/M porn at all. Whether or not it's true, women may see men who have attraction to another men as less masculine, and therefore less attractive. Most women want a guy who is straight, not bisexual. Then bisexual men are in this vortex where some women don't want to date them because they're bi and some gay men don't want to date them because they're bi. I don't know how true it is (probably because I'm not part of the LGBT community), but I've heard that there are gay men who don't want their partner to be swinging for both teams.

objectivetruth · Answer

On that note though, I could never get why some men find lesbianism "hot", especially on porn. Girl-on-girl action isn't really a turn on as much as watching men fuck women. When watching normal hetero porn, I imagine myself as being the lucky guy fucking the hot pale strawberry blonde in lingerie before me, whereas if it was another girl fucking the same girl, it would be a complete turn off for me as I cannot relate to her the same way I would relate to the lucky guy. That's why the majority of men prefer watching straight porn.

Luci92 · Answer

The idea of two women being together is romanticized and almost promoted among popular culture.
The amount of times I have heard a guy say girl on girl is hot is insane. I've even heard 'it's not cheating on me if you hook up with another girl' like wtf?
I've also seen a lot of girls, who have clearly stated they're straight, hook up with another chick just to please the guys around them. Happens a lot at high school tbh.

Jeniferh21 · Answer

I personally find two guys kissing extremely sexy, but whenever I tell that to a guy, they're like " that's gross"

StolenUsername · Answer

It's because most of the stigma about homosexuality comes from straight men (not saying it doesn't come from women either), and it's well known that some men find two women sleeping together sexy. But they feel repulsed by the same thing happening between two men. Probably because they're men and would not like to do it themselves. It makes them feel uncomfortable. Just says a lot about them as individuals really.
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Anonymous · Answer

Woman are seen as the lower tier thats why.

Men are strong and a slightly higher tier. So if u see a another man acting like a female or engage in female activitys then it doesn't make sense.

Gener is not a social construct look at the animal life. wouldn't it look weird. If a male lion startes doing what female lion does.

I can't understand why would u want to be that way. Im a man. And i wouldn't do it so why wpuld anothwr man do it.

Woman and men aren't equal i can't do what she does and she can't do what i do. So a woman being with a woman might make more sense but a male to. A male does not.

No shade or hate just tons of typos and grammars errors

xkellier94x · Answer

I have to disagree here. Men in Ireland have a more positive acceptance than women coming out as gay/bi whatever. I remember being in school and there were girls who were openly gay and they got shit for it but any guy who came out was never verbally attacked or physically for that matter.

TokyoGhoulLover · Answer

I don't know,

it's a patriarchal society so you find it hot?

Girls are already close with each other so what's another step? Dudes just aren't the touchy feelly kind of friends.

... Someone found a bible loophole? Who knows it could be anything really.

uknaked · Answer

Often it is because gay or bi guys are expected to have anal sex, which a lot of people find to be unacceptable, despite the fact that many mixed couples end up having anal sex.
The fact is that, to some degree, everybody is bi, but bi guys who are mainly hetero will deny their gay side.
Lots of married guys are bi, when not with their wives, don't want anal sex, but are happy with giving or receiving a blow job!

cheapshotbob · Answer

i think its become socially acceptable with how some people think woman jsut are more attractive together than guys.

i mean if you look up the best sellers in the porn world it will most likely be girl on girl or girl on girl on guy, guy on guy is not so popular because they are not as seductive as a woman and never will be.

thats just me because i prefer women.

FriendlyDrugDealer · Answer

Well in my opinion, it's usually a male driven world and the idea of open homosexuality is still something the world is adjusting to. So if a girl admits she's bi, Guys go WOAH!! but if guy admits he's bi to his girlfriend, its a strong chance she's going to be a little uncomfortable and possibly turned off but not always. Either way, in another couple of years it may be the same reaction for both bi guys and girls.

cross98 · Answer

nah, jeevan. women are more softer on gay guys and welcome them. look at tyler oakley, he has so many female followers who uplifted him. his mom accepted him, while his dad didn't... my cousin is bi and she got shit for it by some peers and her own mom.

BiscuitesSwag · Answer

Women aren't seen as "less womanly" if she has homosexual tendencies, unlike guys. Also, many guys find lesbian girls making out hot, so they are kind of sexualized, which makes them more accepted in society.

rjroy3 · Answer

Gay is considered feminine traditionally. Guys being feminine is traditionally rejected, unless he's an artist of some kind like a singer or lead guitarist. Something that offsets that he's more of a sensitive guy.
Even a lot of women have problems with bisexual men, because they just feel like he's gay and hasn't committed yet or isn't ready to.

fuqthegovt · Answer

Because historically they haven't flaunted it in public as much. Most don't care until there's parades with practically public orgies. Other than that seeing 2 attractive girls kiss is a turn on for most (of both sexes regardless of orientation). Not even close to as true seeing 2 men do it. Men and women are NOT equal in the real world, regardless of how much the PC crowd bitches and bellyaches and calls it social injustice.

HappierThanYou · Answer

Everything in life is more acceptable for women, than men. Men go to a strip club, they're misogynist perverts. Women see male strippers, it's just a bit of fun. Man has sex with a 15 year old, he's an evil pedo. Woman does the same, she's doing him a favour. Men are evil, women are perfect. That's how equality works. Imagine the feminazi uproar if it was men who had abortions. There wouldn't be any of this "right to choose" bollocks, we'd just all be murdering bastards.

Intraluminal · Answer

The social tendency to allow women to be more masculine, but not to allow men to be more feminine has existed for a long time. Another example is men./boys are often bullied for having feminine names e. gg. Stacy, or Carrol, or Leslie, whereas girls are generally not bullied for having male names.

Ripper_E · Answer

I'm assuming that reaction would come from straight men. Men like lesbians, but obviously have no interest in seeing to men together. It's not more acceptable one way or the other. That's just straight men who are homophobic and have no desire to see gay men or bi men.

feminismisnarcissism · Answer

feminism + christianity. both to blame
one says women are superior-so they can do whatever they want

the other says men are superior.. so who cares if the animals (lesser gender, women are livestock in bible) get it on... so it only sees gay men as a real crime

animus1988 · Answer

because its not normal for a man to submit himself to other men. you can't be an alpha male and be taking it up the ass submitting yourself to another male. that contradicts the very nature of being a man.'

women are submissive by nature so pleasuring another female (a submissive act) is not that weird its expected almost

somebodysaycheese · Answer

Men like bi women women (they sexualize it) dont like bi men. homosexuality is something we biologically see as a weak trait so women dont engage with men who have had same swz relationships because thwy seem "flawed" , its like seeing a obese person your not attracted to the trait. Gay mens sexuality gets way more respect than gay women. First even gay men don't beleive women are actually gay, and people just beleive gay women haven't gotten a goos d#ck down before.

iCroissant · Answer

Personally, I think it's because the thought of two men having sex is considered a more gross thought than two women having sex. Perhaps it also has to do with our need to reproduce and by being pledged to another man they are unwilling to reproduce with women.

Pretty awful, but I think that's how homophobes think.

zagor · Answer

Funny you should ask that as when I went to Tanzania one of the tidbits I read about it was that homosexuality is illegal and punishable by prison. For men, the max is 15 years in prison, for women, 7. Apparently it is dirtier when penises are involved...

FemaleAssassin · Answer

Because men like lesbian/bi women, but they don't usually like gay men. It's ALL about men liking this and men liking that lol.

Anonymous · Answer

So I think it's because mostly men have a problem with people being gay. And we're more accepting of gay women because we like eating pussy so we can see why someone would want to do it. But I can't figure out why anyone would want to suck dick so I can't relate to them

ObviouslyOriginalMe · Answer

Because people associate gay with femininity and guys have some sorta beef with being "girly". Girls have always ranged from tomboy to girlie girl so a masculine girl isn't anything that new.

shessoheavy · Answer

I think that it rooted in gender inequality, which negatively affects all genders. A guy being "feminine" is more taboo than a girl being "masculine". Tomboy is really not an insult, is there a no nice word for the opposite.

evelator_253 · Answer

i don't know about you, but in my area it's more common for guys to be gay or bi and less common for girls to be bi or lesbian.
so i'm more okay with guys being gay or bi just because i see it so many times.

ParamountArmada · Answer

its because girls are the physically and sexually attractive gender, and guys are not. so everything a guy does is always considered to be unattractive. especially when its sexual. even by both genders. its just how it is.

Ratiocinative · Answer

Because for a man to become feminine he has to become weaker. For a woman to be masculine she has to become stronger. Strength is a respectable trait, weakness is not.

BubbleQueen · Answer

It's not really more acceptable for women than men, there will always be people who frown upon it

Anonymous · Answer

Usually from guys who are insecure about their own sexuality.  But I've never noticed an "acceptance" difference.  Look at the amount of women who want that gay best male friend.

yellowgirl00d · Answer

Dude if you wanna know the truth it's not good but it's because guys find two chicks making out hot but chicks don't find two guys making out hot.

angelwingscake5 · Answer

Because 90 percent of guys like seeing women together or in a sexual way and also a lot of guys want to have 2 girls at the same time😀😊😎👍👍👍

Jan1ssary_ · Answer

Because man is the leader, controller, ruler and powerful. You can't expect these abilities from a guy who is feminine yes?

fauchelevent · Answer

Not really acceptable, more sexualised. Reaction to my being sexual isn't really a 'positive' one, it's more like 'great, do you have a lot of threesomes?' or people think you're a slut :P

Waffles731 · Answer

I think its because men like to imagine women having sex.

coachTanthony · Answer

If two people are attracted to each other then GAME ON. Life is too short to worry about what others think. Just in my opinion.

Anonymous · Answer

I dont believe this I see many guys that are gay... what I have seen that they too are accepted... But of course you will always have those people that are against it.

Prof_Don · Answer

Because so many (striaght) males, put so much value of the identity of himself and fellow males, on getting affirmation and sex from women.  Its rather pathetic in my opinion.

Anpu23 · Answer

there is one theory that makes sense to me. primates in the wild use soddomy to show dominance, and it maybe a instinctual reaction to primitive behavior.

KauraBeth · Answer

From what I've heard it's because it's considered "hot" to see more girls kissing each other than guys wich I find to be completely repulsive

kingofknights · Answer

because a male is expected to be really manly and show no emotion.  Saying you're gay destroys that manly hood and notion on how you should act, and you know what happens when that occurs.

Anonymous · Answer

The world is weird. If a man has multiple sex partners he's cool, if a woman does; she's easy and slutty.

Relentless_Hippie · Answer

Neither is acceptable.

Death_of_rats · Answer

I swing both ways and couldnt give 2 fucks what anyone thinks lol. I get the best of both worlds. its win win for me.

babeeeone · Answer

I feel like it's because it's expected for men to be seen as masculine and manly, so when they're rubbin up on some other man people don't see them as that

93stepsawayfromhome · Answer

Many men find lesbians hot. Correction, the "lesbians" they see in porn.

Mesonfielde · Answer

Because masculinity is more enforced than femininity

DodgersGM · Answer

Generalizing here: it's because dudes like girl-on-girl but don't like guy-on-guy.

Saoirse_Nua · Answer

It is probably getting better now maybe in 30/40 years he could be so what you are gay, my brother actually wants to be an accountant.

jman46241 · Answer

Women are by far considered more attractive and a sign of beauty. I agree with the consideration.

Yoloxt23 · Answer

Why is it? Because all women are nothing but misandristic cunts and men are self-loathing fucktards!

Muhammad1999 · Answer

Neither should be accepted , if you want to have a healthy society.

Why is it more acceptable for women to be gay/bi but not for men?

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Is it more socially acceptable for women to be lesbian rather than men being gay?

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Is it more socially acceptable for women to be lesbian rather than men being gay?

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