Housewives aren't employees. They're just doing chores because they're the available adult. If the woman was working 45 hours a week and the man was taking care of the house and kids during the day, what do you expect the woman to do? She pays his bills, buys his food and keeps the roof over his head and you think she should give him a cold-blooded salary like some kind of employee?
You know what destroys family's and marriages? I'll go out on a limb and say forcing the provider to be their partner's LITERAL and legal boss is probably really high up on the list. If that's your idea of marriage than I feel sorry for you. There's a reason married couples share finances - because they're no longer two separate people that just happen to live under the same roof. They're husband and wife, and they share every joy and suffering that befalls them
Staying home may be nice, but having no income is hell. I’d need my own money no matter what. The good news is women can make more money at home from their laptop than most blue collar men are making working outside.
No I️ don’t think he should be her employer. I️ think it’s good for a woman to be independent financially so if anything happens, it’s not going to affect her.
@Anon85 It's interesting. My wife is a stay-at-home mom, homemaker. She never seems to have a problem with it. Neither did my mom or hers or our grandparents. It's only recently that it's become an issue with being a homemaker. I think that's adding to the single parent families. If a guy has to pay his "wife" to do what a wife is supposed to do then it's just better to be single and send the money to another address.
It just seem ridiculously cold and destructive to poison your marriage with some kind of employer/employee relationship.
As for why it's become an issue, I'd chalk that up to progressive ideology that looks to make women a victim in every conceivable human arrangement. Instead of not having to work a regular job it's not GETTING to work a regular job. It's the same situation but now people look for any possible angle to make the woman into a victim. It's endlessly patronizing.
Being a stay at home wife/mom is fine but how many families are struggling with one income? I’m 33 and I️ don’t even know any couples who are affording that without a significant amount of help from baby boomer parents and grandparents.
Really? I can see that in a big city in a coastal state but most places if you have a full time job of $10 an hour you have more than enough to support a wife
I️ live along coastal S. Carolina and for a couple you can’t find decent a home for under $1,200 a month around here. That’s for a one or two bedroom. If you have 3 bdr it’s near 15 hundred. I️ know a lot of couples my age with kids who are living off of parents, welfare, or someone’s inheritance who passed away to be honest.
What exactly is the problem if, instead of paying the bills and buying the food, you give them money for the extra work they’re doing that you would have to pay a maid to do or do yourself otherwise? I’ll tell you. You won’t feel as if you have control anymore. If your partner wants to buy something, they’ll always need to as you for it. If you’re a horrible partner, they won’t be able to do much about it because they have to depend on you for money... despite the fact that you’re not actually doing more work than they are. So, basically, you’re both taking the load off of each other, except you’re getting paid to do it and the partner isn’t... How is that fair? If you want your partner to stay at home, this should be the arrangement in my correct opinion.
It's not about wanting your partner to stay at home, it's about letting your partner stay at home. I'm 18 and I'll probably be living with my parents for another year, doing just as much housework as my mother does. I know what it's like to take care of the house. It's a luxury. Why does every good thing you hear automatically translate into being forced?
If it was the other way around, would you be saying that? That a working woman providing for her husband has no motivation but freaking "control"? My father works his ass off every day so that his wife will never have to, and she can take care of my siblings and I so that we actually have a parent who can be there for us when we need help. With condescending statements like that you may as well be slapping him in the face.
So stop assuming everyone's intentions as if you know them. Maybe that's the only messed up reason you'd ever do it but speak for yourself.
I'm NJ other forcing it on anyone, I'm talking about how OP seems to think that it's forced. That the provider cares about nothing but control. It's absolutely misguided
Actually I don’t think it’s forced, hence, “ESPECIALLY if the partner wants them to stay at home.” Well, you should be doing all of the housework. Also, you’re not taking care of children or breastfeeding, and you’re likely not cooking for them. Also, no, it’s not always about control... I’m trying to make the point that it could very easily, and a lot of times does, turn into control or telling the partner, “You wouldn’t have this if it weren’t for me,” which is ridiculous, since the partner is also doing things for them.
It’s funny that you’re so against giving your partner money... and it’s not even as if you’re just doing it out of the kindness of your heart without getting anything in return.
Maybe in a sorts of cheques or tokens that can be exchanged for a myriad of stuff but not in money. Perhaps also see that they can have healthcare and a retirement.
0
0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
All jobs are paid by what they are deemed worth so if someone is willing to pay then yes.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
33Opinion
Uhhhh it’s their kids? They have a responsibility to take care of them. Besides, who would even pay them?
Yes, by their partner... especially if the partner wants them to stay at home. They can then pay their bills or whatever separately.
Staying at home is a luxury, not a punishment
Depends on what you’re doing at home, actually.
Housewives aren't employees. They're just doing chores because they're the available adult. If the woman was working 45 hours a week and the man was taking care of the house and kids during the day, what do you expect the woman to do? She pays his bills, buys his food and keeps the roof over his head and you think she should give him a cold-blooded salary like some kind of employee?
You know what destroys family's and marriages? I'll go out on a limb and say forcing the provider to be their partner's LITERAL and legal boss is probably really high up on the list. If that's your idea of marriage than I feel sorry for you. There's a reason married couples share finances - because they're no longer two separate people that just happen to live under the same roof. They're husband and wife, and they share every joy and suffering that befalls them
I guess we should start paying our children for setting the table for supper, too
Staying home may be nice, but having no income is hell. I’d need my own money no matter what. The good news is women can make more money at home from their laptop than most blue collar men are making working outside.
@MzAsh. Then by all means, do so. But if you were demanding that your husband be your employer you may as well be handing him a divorce paper.
It's a horrible thing to do to someone
No I️ don’t think he should be her employer. I️ think it’s good for a woman to be independent financially so if anything happens, it’s not going to affect her.
I didn't mean to say you would, I was just saying what it would be like in the picture OP was painting
@Anon85 It's interesting. My wife is a stay-at-home mom, homemaker. She never seems to have a problem with it. Neither did my mom or hers or our grandparents. It's only recently that it's become an issue with being a homemaker. I think that's adding to the single parent families. If a guy has to pay his "wife" to do what a wife is supposed to do then it's just better to be single and send the money to another address.
It just seem ridiculously cold and destructive to poison your marriage with some kind of employer/employee relationship.
As for why it's become an issue, I'd chalk that up to progressive ideology that looks to make women a victim in every conceivable human arrangement. Instead of not having to work a regular job it's not GETTING to work a regular job. It's the same situation but now people look for any possible angle to make the woman into a victim. It's endlessly patronizing.
Being a stay at home wife/mom is fine but how many families are struggling with one income? I’m 33 and I️ don’t even know any couples who are affording that without a significant amount of help from baby boomer parents and grandparents.
Really? I can see that in a big city in a coastal state but most places if you have a full time job of $10 an hour you have more than enough to support a wife
You're not paying two rents or bills, after all, just food and clothing really. Two people aren't twice as expensive as one person
I️ live along coastal S. Carolina and for a couple you can’t find decent a home for under $1,200 a month around here. That’s for a one or two bedroom. If you have 3 bdr it’s near 15 hundred. I️ know a lot of couples my age with kids who are living off of parents, welfare, or someone’s inheritance who passed away to be honest.
What exactly is the problem if, instead of paying the bills and buying the food, you give them money for the extra work they’re doing that you would have to pay a maid to do or do yourself otherwise? I’ll tell you. You won’t feel as if you have control anymore. If your partner wants to buy something, they’ll always need to as you for it. If you’re a horrible partner, they won’t be able to do much about it because they have to depend on you for money... despite the fact that you’re not actually doing more work than they are. So, basically, you’re both taking the load off of each other, except you’re getting paid to do it and the partner isn’t... How is that fair? If you want your partner to stay at home, this should be the arrangement in my correct opinion.
Oh I️ forgot to mention drug dealing. There are a lot of people dealing in the side fir extra cash.
It's not about wanting your partner to stay at home, it's about letting your partner stay at home. I'm 18 and I'll probably be living with my parents for another year, doing just as much housework as my mother does. I know what it's like to take care of the house. It's a luxury. Why does every good thing you hear automatically translate into being forced?
If it was the other way around, would you be saying that? That a working woman providing for her husband has no motivation but freaking "control"? My father works his ass off every day so that his wife will never have to, and she can take care of my siblings and I so that we actually have a parent who can be there for us when we need help. With condescending statements like that you may as well be slapping him in the face.
So stop assuming everyone's intentions as if you know them. Maybe that's the only messed up reason you'd ever do it but speak for yourself.
@Anon85 Well, not everyone wants to stay at home or sees it as a luxury. Maybe you do but other people might find it boring.
I'm NJ other forcing it on anyone, I'm talking about how OP seems to think that it's forced. That the provider cares about nothing but control. It's absolutely misguided
*not
Actually I don’t think it’s forced, hence, “ESPECIALLY if the partner wants them to stay at home.” Well, you should be doing all of the housework. Also, you’re not taking care of children or breastfeeding, and you’re likely not cooking for them. Also, no, it’s not always about control... I’m trying to make the point that it could very easily, and a lot of times does, turn into control or telling the partner, “You wouldn’t have this if it weren’t for me,” which is ridiculous, since the partner is also doing things for them.
It’s funny that you’re so against giving your partner money... and it’s not even as if you’re just doing it out of the kindness of your heart without getting anything in return.
Bye now.
I just feel bad for your future spouse, is all. Have a good one, miss
@Anon85 Her relationships won't last long.
@MzAsh You ask about one income struggles. My family is a one income family. We know all about it.
They get free food and accommodation, and whatever else they fancy. Why do they need money?
Full femjnist question... Worst lart is - it's not even defined correctly...
They already get recompense nicely. It's called getting a penis and bills being paid.
Maybe in a sorts of cheques or tokens that can be exchanged for a myriad of stuff but not in money. Perhaps also see that they can have healthcare and a retirement.
All jobs are paid by what they are deemed worth so if someone is willing to pay then yes.
By who exactly?
Husbands.
No. That’s dumb.
They should. But their work and sacrifice are priceless we can't compare it with money
You use his money what more do you want?
they access the family finances, that's enough
That's not how economy works...
Should men get paid for house maintanace work?
People do houseswork AND work all the time, so no.
Yes but not with money
Yes an allowance
By who?
No they shouldn't
No they shouldn't
Nope