Do you think we blame the opposite gender too much for our own faults?

Question

Do you think that men blame women too much for their own faults, and vice versa?

nightdrot · Accepted Answer

Voted Yes, but it is not a function of gender per se. It is rather because the culture has become - annoyingly so, quite frankly - whinny, self-satisfied and self-pitying. Drenched in an ethic that suggests any unhappiness in one'e life must be someone else's fauly. The opposite gender, then, merely becoming one of many groups that one can blame for one's own troubles.

It is revealed in some rather interesting ways. The current pandemic illustrating, funny enough, being an example.

The media and policymakers have declared the pandemic the equivalent of war, and that health care providers are heroes. This would be as if, after Pearl Harbor, President Roosevelt had declared the nation at war and then told everyone to go and sit in their living rooms.

The men and women who were working the farms and the factories and the soda shops were then involuntarily drafted by their country, slapped into uniforms and sent to get shot at n tropical islands and French beaches. All of this they did effectively and in spite of whatever plans they may have originally had for their own lives. This was heroism.

By contrast, the health care workers and emergency services personnel chose their professions. They knew the risks and accepted them. They deserve praise for their skills and thanks for their efforts, but to call them heroes is to stretch the meaning of the word past the point where it has any recognizable meaning. They are doing their duty - a duty they chose.

The rest of the nation, while facing undoubted hardships, has been asked to do little more than sit at home. Oh, the horrors!

So what is the connection of all this to the question at hand. It is the presumption of one's own moral worth. We are all heroes and all noble and when we have a fault it therefore stands to reason that it was not our fault, because we are all heroes and good.

Therefore it is the fault of someone or something else. In the realm of personal happiness, the opposite gender as often as not gets the blame. For women, men have oppressed them and are selfish. For men, women are indifferent to their feelings and are clinging to old grievances.

These are wild overgeneralizations. They do not get to an individual's particular strengths and weaknesses and circumstances, but rather made sweeping analysis and then place oneself at the center of that analysis. It does not seek to self-explore one's own character, but to assess blame for one's unhappiness.

This because the assumption of the culture is that people are basically good, that they are entitled to perfect happiness and that progress is foreordained. So therefore we are all heroes and when we as individuals are unhappy, it cannot be because we are responsible for our own choices and because life is imperfect, but because we are victims.

Blame the politicians, the elites, the rich, or the opposite sex. It is all the same ethic - if ethic it can be called. The one thing that cannot be blamed for our own misery is ourselves. The opposite sex then being one in a long line of groups and individuals to bear the blame for our errors and sins.

YHL6965 · Accepted Answer

Yes and all of that is fueled by the medias and politics because dividing people, putting them against one another makes it easier to control them. What helped me to avoid this trap is to realize that I have met a lot of kind and wonderful women in my life and it's unfair to put them in the same basket as all the toxic ones. I believe that there are way more wonderful women like the ones I met than toxic women. I believe that the toxic women are just a vocal minority and that there is a silent majority of wonderful women.

Aislin9 · Accepted Answer

I'm sure many of the guys on here are going to hate my opinion. :D

So today I had the perfect example of this. This guy writes me and asks me if I can help him out with a 'love' problem. I agree. He proceeds to tell me that he is horny. I tell him that it's not my problem, I'm not going to discuss his horniness, go ask some straight guy. He write no, he doesn't 'crave' straight guys and starts to tell me I'm a rude feminist. So in other words, I'm a feminist because I turned down his attempt at getting off.

Am I in the wrong here because I didn't want to talk about his horniness? Am I in the wrong that I didn't act as a free text prostitute? So I am this evil creature that denied him getting off? Seriously this selfishness is what's wrong with the world.

Is there any other way to interpret this situation? Am I supposed to take the blame for his behavior?

CubsterShura · Accepted Answer

Oh hell fucking yes. Some of them can make sense especially if it has anything to do with childhood trauma, but when women complain about how most men aren't attracted to fat women or men complain about women not giving them sex because they have been so nice to them... Oh c'mon

Petra150 · Answer

I think we women blame men for we us self isn't happy for our look. Especially do us tall girl blame men for it, and by gating them shorter, so we blame shorter guys for we seems taller, very illogical but still , we think a guy who isn't tall, make us become taller, that's perhaps the biggest taboo

Mystic_Nova · Answer

Definently. a lot of people have become a society of finger pointers and people who rely on instant gratification.

Nobody is willing to have a conversation and compromise. It's their way or nothing at all. Also, people dont like to think of others point of view.

Edd87259 · Answer

Yes yes yes and yes I can't go 10 seconds on this app without seeing why men this why men that it dose happen the other way around but lately I feel there are a lot of women victimising all men based on the actions of some I'm not sure why this has heated up so much in the last couple days maybe people are going stir crazy at home or something and need to stir up shit to feel better.

Obtuse · Answer

I think too many people don't hold themselves accountable enough if things aren't going the way they want. I don't see this issue restricted to the opposite sexes towards each other. It seems to be more widespread than that, like obesity being blamed on the fast-food industry, gender wage gaps on the patriarchy, incels blaming women's preferences, bully-victims blaming bullies, etc. etc. etc.

hellacray · Answer

Well a lot of people don't like to own up to their own mistakes. And women love to play victim even when they're wrong. I mean feminism is basically blaming men for everything and I'd say it's a borderline hate group.

If I make a mistake I think it's better to own up to it and then move on. There's no need to tell a whole story explaining how it's not your fault.

Ghost_retro · Answer

Ahh people play the blame game and get to involved and they forgot oh fuck I am in relationship.. tell them or make them take accountability.. on which ever spectrum need. and freaking spend that time building something... ahh.. sounds boring but the thing it's just happened happened.. just go on replace that

MountAverage · Answer

Absolutely. Humans generally tend to put the blamme away from themselves, it's a defense mechanism. We're all guilty of it to some degree, but it's important to make yourself aware of it and try to work against it.
And can we please all appreciate the irony of the guys here saying "women do, men don't"? Haha seriously, how old are these people? 12? How can grown individuals be so entirely blind to their own bullshit? Incredible.

DiscomfortZone · Answer

I don't see men blaming women for shit. I actually see 21 desperate, pathetic losers all over a pink post five minutes after it's published. I see attention whores who look like they gave a blowjob to a chainsaw, but dressed like prostitutes, so all the desperate losers hit on them even when they live on a different continent. If thers's any false blaming between the genders - it ain't the "men" here who do it. That much is obvious, evem to the fake ass cowards who voted here.

Iwillfindyou21 · Answer

Yes. I hate it when men have a bad time, they always have to say "it's because women make a harder time for us". Or when a guy gets rejected too often, most of such guys blame it on the girls who rejected them but they don't want to think about their own behaviors.

virendra382 · Answer

"Accepting your mistakes" i think nowdays becoming rare. And if someone does this, other people starts saying that he/she can't take his/her stand. I think if it require courage to speak then it needs more courage to listen too. And if its a fault of the opposite gender and he/she is anot accepting that then dont force them to accept that. Let it go. Unsolved things get solved with time when situation cools. Not every fight requirs agression, some can be solved with patience😁 and love❣️

crazy8000 · Answer

Both yes and no.
Certain kind of people tends to blame others anyway no matter gender. it just makes it easier for them to do it when certain ideology groups that's based on it.

Misogyn and victim groups like femenism usually does instead of taking responsibility for their own shit.
Just like some parts of MGTOW in the past.

Adam1978 · Answer

But it's not just cross gender, some people blame other people because it's easier then actually do something about the issue. I try my best to avoid that but I don't take responsibility for others actions so sometimes it can seem like I do.

risha196 · Answer

It's human nature to blame others for your own faults to save yourself... But we should consider other's feelings as well and should not try to do the same

bebedomingo · Answer

Some people blame one because of what the other has for example a woman might work in a medical job and the man could be working at a school so there income are not the same so when it comes to bills and stocking things for the house one might feel that the other one does not help as much as the other one does

Pegases · Answer

lol women blame everything on men. That's just the way it it is. Most of us don't really care and as a result don't take it personally.

Kaneki05 · Answer

Blame them for what? Heck i don't even get what i would blaming them for so no?

Jaximus-Lion · Answer

Nope! Everybody blames every one, no matter the gender

SlothySlob · Answer

Of course. It's far easier to blame someone else for your own faults than admit that it was all your fault.

Lynx122 · Answer

Yes lol all you have to do is look at this site a bit ;)

worldscolide · Answer

I never blame a whole gender for anything.. I blame individuals, or my self, but never a whole gender.. Voted yes by the way..

Jackblue · Answer

Men at least on this site are more guilty of that then women, but both genders are guilty of doing a lot of blaming the other for their own faults.

hi_it_is_me123 · Answer

Yes. Gag is an example for it how many guys constantly blame women for everything

Fromdusktilldawn · Answer

There is a french phrase "Il faut chercher la femme." Which means exactly: for every problem you have to look for a woman to blame

Daniel3035 · Answer

women yes men no. It's literally a circle of blame the guy and the guy has to take it no matter how wrong she really is.

Tonita91996 · Answer

Blame the guy for taking advantages of us when he just wanted sex but the guy never told us or worked for a relationship.

Shamalien · Answer

It's not nearly as common for a dude to complain about his girlfriend as it is for a girl to complain about her boyfriend...

Historylover18 · Answer

After seeing many rants about how men ain't shit and how women are terrible, I can easily say yes to this.

AllThatSweetJazz · Answer

Eh, depends there’s a truth out there and it needn’t be every balanced.

DudeDiligence · Answer

Yes, both sexes do this, but western feminists are obviously particularly prolific at it.

OddBeMe · Answer

Like race, we take stereotypes too seriously. Have to remember each person is diff

chriscdi · Answer

sometimes but sometimes the opposite gender is at fault lol

jakeofalltrades · Answer

I think that is a major flaw of humanity, we blame everyone else for our troubles not just the opposite gender

kauto_tonko · Answer

I think I blame myself for everything. I mean I even blame myself for shit I didn't do.

Aiko_E_Lara · Answer

When feminists complain about blaming feminism when they blame men themselves.

Eduardonaranja · Answer

I don't I have no time for that I just let most things fly by I am worry free.

7771999 · Answer

I definitely don't. I know my problems don't come from women

Pranav27 · Answer

Well in a relationship maybe but if you are single u don't blame the musfortune that happens to you u just accept it

lolcraft · Answer

It's easier to see the faults of others than our own.

Emperorxxxemilio · Answer

I’m the only one who’s responsible for my perceived faults or weaknesses.

purplepenguin1 · Answer

How can my faults be their fault? That’s on me

serious · Answer

Tough to answer. Good question though.

drummerdude25 · Answer

Any self-aware person would say yes.

Rangers · Answer

Girls, absolutely, but men don't blame them enough

SuccessfulHornDog · Answer

Yes, but its all because women started it :)

martinxdenver · Answer

We still blaming each other on here as well😂

TonyTheGuid0 · Answer

I think a lot of men do that

Random_Guy_Online · Answer

A lot of the time when I'm frustrated

Stan_Control_ · Answer

Duh. It's inevitable.

whynut111 · Answer

It's an easy copout for both sides

growbig85 · Answer

Because people are selfish

Supermanhu456 · Answer

We generally blam others fir our own fault

archiz · Answer

On this site only

CaseyBlack · Answer

I have no faults

BruceJender · Answer

Yes.

monkeynutts · Answer

Maybe.

captain_voidwalker · Answer

Women yes, men no

Do you think we blame the opposite gender too much for our own faults?

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Why not we call out our own gender for faults?

Do you think we blame the opposite gender too much for our own faults?

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Why not we call out our own gender for faults?

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