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The practice of assuming your husband’s name was birthed in a deeply patriarchal society, and centuries later, the tradition still stands. Believe it or not, the practice of a woman taking her husband’s last name is a vestige of a law that dates back to the 11th century.
Under English common law, coverture asserted that once married, a woman’s identity was “covered” by her husband. From the moment of her marriage, a woman was known as a “feme covert” or covered woman; she and her husband essentially became one. With her identity essentially erased under the law of coverture, women could not own property or enter into contracts on their own. Husbands had complete control over their wives, legally and financially. More alarmingly, the law limited a woman’s recourse in rape and domestic violence cases, and they had no legal rights over their children.
Since women are no longer considered property of their husbands, many women are opting not to change their last names. The process is rather complicated and can cause a lot of confusion, so it's simpler not to have to deal with that process.
back in the day a woman taking her husband name meant she was his propriety. (but it's an old stuff that came from the middle age of something) before the woman was the property of her father and after she become the propriety of her husband (so she change her name).
Nowadays it doesn't have the same meaning but the first meaning was this one so I guess it's for this reasons they don't want to take it.
In Mexico we use the last name of both our parents. You can see that someone is called Pedro Martinez Garza. The first one Martinez is the fathers last name and the second one Garza is the mothers last name. Often a married woman would use her last name followed by the last name of her husband, so she always keeps her last name. But I do have to mention that before the husbands last name, they use the word 'de' which means 'of'. So in the USA it would look something like Rachel Smith of Adams. But it is not a legal thing that you need to change IDs or anything else.
Is that why Esteban from suite life of zack and Cody’s name was so long?
Because that would imply that feminists actually get married to men. Lesbians, transmen, and manginas don't count.
But you are right that their last name is just their father's. They should do what the radical black SJW's do and just change their last name to a letter. But instead of "X," they can be double X.
Personally, I think marriage is antiquated. I almost got married myself, and honestly, I doubt it would've lasted more than three years had she not passed away. I loved her, but I'm not sure how much she truly loved me.
Opinion
35Opinion
It's really the only things feminists have ever done to help men, albeit unintentionally. If a woman won't enthusiastically take her husband's name when they get married, that is the clearest signal a man can be given that he is marrying the wrong woman. Any man with a brain and a shred of self respect will dump her then and there.
Thank you, feminism.
@ugbucket I don't completely agree with that. Marriage can be great with the right woman. I know some very happily married couples and marriage works great for them. But I know more men who have been screwed in marriage/divorce. The fact is marriage is a trap for a lot of men today. Half of marriages end in divorce, women file the vast majority of them and men are usually treated very unfairly in divorce court and child custody settlements. But for the few men lucky enough to find and marry a good woman today, marriage can be great.
I don't know what any of that has to do whether a good man and a good woman should get married.
Odd thing. One feminist girl I know in particular. She's on her second marriage. First marriage she took his name even tho she was ardently against it before marriage. Gets a divorce.
Marries another guy. Doesn't take his name. Cheats on her husband. Still married to the guy. Her first marriage she didn't cheat, but the man she cheated on also happens to be the man she wouldn't take his name.
In my opinion it's a respect thing. She just doesn't honor her man.
I don’t think it’s just about feminists, my country - Georgia is Eastern Orthodox Christian dominated and many people are quite traditional, however, not a single woman takes a husband’s last name and husbands are happy with it.
I was raised this way and I don’t see a problem in it to keep my own last name, to be honest I’d feel sad if I was demanded to change it, because that’s not normal in the country where I am from.
Funny thing is, my boyfriend actually offered me to take my last name once we married, I persuaded him it’s better if he keeps his last name, because I love his last name and I wouldn’t want him to change anything in himself because of me.
This is basic stuff that even preschoolers understand: If I put my name on something it is mine My House, My Car, My Lunch, My Wife mine mine mine
Well, that doesn’t work this way in my country.
It’s sexy though for a man to want me to be his “mine”, I find that possessiveness sexy but women in my country have been living this way for centuries, I wouldn’t like to change it for anyone.
People of my kind are just 3 million in the world, only real Caucasians left in that area of the world where I live. Even if I marry someone from other country (my boyfriend is a foreigner) I would like my children to consider themselves to be from my country as well, and carry my last-name along with my husband’s.
That being said I have a very melodious last name.
And my husband will be mine as well ;) We will belong to each other.
Im not asking where you are from😑
@LaFemmeFatale_1 well at least you understand that a lot of women see the whole being mine thing as being a slave
You’re not asking, but without knowing that you won’t understand why I think the way I think. :)
Maybe because they are happy with keeping their maiden name. I mean would you take your wife’s name? That’s a question that seems kind of one sided. And for the record, I CHOSE to take my husband’s name.
She should take mine it’s about respect
Yeah, why don’t you respect her and take her name?
Okay and if someone disrespects her in public she can defend herself then LET THE MAN BE THE MAN IDIOT!
Oh, grow up. Clearly you aren’t mature enough to even consider marriage yet.
You’re the one who is obviously immature with no wife skills
@creampiekarl420 really. That’s funny, since my husband seems to be pretty happy with my wifey skills. But you are 22, and probably don’t even have a chance with a girl. You might as well join a monastery.
@KatherineJ believe what you believe but at the end of the day action speaks louder than words so you obviously agree with me
@creampiekarl420 I made my decision based on what I believe, and what I wanted. That does not mean that every other woman should feel like they have to. Besides, there are a lot of men out there who do not deserve the honor.
There's only the struggle against the patriarchy. Their purpose for marrying is to get close to the enemy so they can do the most damage. Harming boys is a plus.
Taking his name is small potatoes. She wants to take him to the cleaners in the inevitable upcoming divorce. That's why an increasing number of men look overseas in the Orient and Latin America. They are far less likely to be infected with Feminist Derangement Syndrome.
Cuz she is a feminist and she has to be against everything related to manish topics even if it is not logical she has to race or organize competitions between two genders lol But this leads to two different gender hate each other if they do these kind of things.
Lol I have just laughed at the update :) Then we have to expect woman to propose us , right , since we are equal? We could derive much more questions or complications about these issues and still cannot make any progress and the argue will not even stop.
It's not a feminist thing, here is actually the law, and has been since the military fascist regime from WW2.
It's a thing useful to protect certain assets from the spouses' families, so only the children can inherit.
They don't take it because they are already planning to sabotage the relationship or they know they will ruin the relationship so there's no point in taking his name
Woo! Nothing like a nice tall glass of harsh truth in the morning 😆
Either way they are screwed.
They take their husband's last name, or they keep the last name given to them by their father (another male).
I guess the hyphen was the attempt at feminists taking stock of maintaining their original name pre husband.
Also different levels of feminists like any movement
Nothing says "smash the patriarchy" quite like refusing to part with your father's name, which is pretty ironic considering how many of the most vitriolic feminists seem to have grown up with daddy issues.
What in the world is a feminist?
Who decides?
My ex is a feminist.
We are divorced. She is remarried. . .
guess who's last name she uses?
Mine.
Ahhhh... I love the irony you captured here, its funny.
No seriously changing your name around is a huge pain for women. I mean you got to change everything from drivers licenses to bank accounts. So for me as long as we are agreed that if we have any sons that they get my last name and daughters can have hers, I am find with her keeping her own last name. But I will not do hyphened last names or make our kids have both or two last names. I just don't believe in that.
I don't know, but if my wife ever tried pulling this the wedding would be off. Why? this is a great sign of how cooperative and flexible she's going to be for the rest of your life. Run James, run!
That’s how I feel it shows a lack of resolve
Why do anti feminists always force or tell women what to do?
if a woman wants to work, she has the right to work.
if a woman wants to keep her last name, she has the choice to keep her last name.
quit acting like men can boss women around and go fuck off
We literally can women owe everything to us
You say "anti-feminist" like it's a bad thing.
They could’ve birth or raise without men
Absolutely not 🙄
C420, an ANTI-feminist is someone who is against feminism. I think you may have gotten a bit confused about it, judging by your response.
Is anyone actually "forcing" you to do anything? Anything at all? Western women are THE most priviledged people to ever walk the face of the Earth during the entire history of mankind, and yet they still constantly whinge about how unfair everything is!
It's incredible. You people have absolutely NO idea how utterly out of touch with reality you are, how spolit you are, how unhinged you are.
@3Andronicus
do you know how women in countries where feminism does not exist in other countries, are treated? women are treated like shit in countries where feminism does not exist.
so now you're implying that since women are so privileged in USA, then the least women can do is to let men force them to become stay home wives or let men force all women to take their last names?
there will never ever be a reason to justify forcing someone to do something they don't want to do. And its sickening that you think that men should have power over women.
@3Andronicus
[You people have absolutely NO idea how utterly out of touch with reality you are, how spolit you are, how unhinged you are.]
I am spoiled for touting MY RIGHT to not take my husband's last name or touting MY RIGHT to not become a housewife, if I don't want to?
What makes you think I don't have the right to make decisions for my own life?
I'm not spoiled. I think you're just a misogynists who insists that men should have power over women.
Whatever. I can't be bothered with this discussion, because it's just as pointless as the other one we had.
Good by crazy lady :*
@Agagagagaga hey they know what I’m all about 😂😂😂 ain’t no shame in my game
Oh? You roasted me in the past? Sorry, I didn’t notice.
Ooh. Ouch. You called me a misogynist. How ever will I get to sleep tonight? 😂
Suck shit through a tube. 🖕
Start a gender war? Wow, aren't you melodramatic (if you don't know what that word means, look it up).
@3Andronicus
I am NOT privileged or entitled for exerting MY RIGHT to not take my husband's last name. I am NOT entitled or privileged for exerting my basic human right to a choice to work. These are basic human rights. There will never be a reason to justify anyone forcing me to do something I don't want to.
Its so fucked up that women having a choice to take on my husband's last name is called "entitled or privileged".
how about I force you to take on your wife's last name and strip all men of their ability to work careers or go to school? how would you feel about that?
@grega239
[Why get married if your not gonna take his name as part of a family?
If the man can spenf thousands for a ring, the least you can do is take his name.]
why shouldn't men be forced to take on their wive's names? why do they insist that a woman take on his name?
A woman has to spend thousands on a man's ring too. She also has to birth his children, raise his children , do all of his laundry, cooking, housework while working a full time job.
Why take a mans name?
Because the man is responsible for the whole familys survival.
His job is to "gather resources" for the family. he's responsible for their safety.
Thats why.
And you can't be a family with 2 different family names. A family is meant to be United under a name.
And about the wife doing the laundry and cleaning, thats called team work. Ill break my back at work and you break your back at home.
Id prefer my wife to be at home because its safe. But thats just me.
@grega239
[Because the man is responsible for the whole familys survival.]
Vast majority of families cannot survive on 1 income anymore. Welcome to 2022, its no longer your misogynist era of the 1950s where women must take your last name.
[His job is to "gather resources" for the family. he's responsible for their safety.
Thats why.]
do you realize that vaast majority of mothers actually have jobs and work? there are more women in graduate school in men. I don't think any woman would pull out loans to attend graduate school if she didn't plan on getting a job after graduating.
[And you can't be a family with 2 different family names. A family is meant to be United under a name.]
well there are plenty of married women who did not take on their husbands last names and they are still happily married. so whats your response to that?
[And about the wife doing the laundry and cleaning, thats called team work. Ill break my back at work and you break your back at home.]
The only problem is that when the man is breaking his neck at work, he still struggles to send his kids to college and doesn't have enough money for his wife to get her nails done.
[Id prefer my wife to be at home because its safe. But thats just me.]
there's little to no chance a boy like you who had never been supported himself, and has absolutely no financial wisdom or experience to support a wife and kids. how do you support a wife and kids , if you have never even paid your own bills?
You're right. Its 2022. Marriage is an outdated ritual from a misogynist era.
That also means she can pay for her own nails and all that.
Boy? Im 1 year younger than you.
I supported my ex when she was unemployed even though it wasn't the 1950s... must have been my misogynistic tendencies.
Any man that marries a feminist is a sico and isn't a man anymore
Fun fact about liberal feminist women they’re actually more attracted to conservative men
Most of the hardcore feminists are not marrrying, or at least they are not marrying men.
That’s sad like that woman who killed her sons because she didn’t want them to grow up to be rapist
Everybody deserves their own identity, women have been oppressed longer than anybody can remember hell they couldn't even vote till 1920. Let them have this actually it's more progressive for a guy to take his wife's last name and who really cares anyway if you're marrying her because you love her.. what the f*** does popular opinion have to do with anything?
The real question should be why feminists marry or marry a male and not only and exclusively women.
Because they’re to proud to admit that traditional men are more attractive
One good reason is that it's a pain in the ass. Another is that she may already be well known.
I think it depends on the cultural background of the couple, I know a family and the wife was already a doctor when she married, and rather than have to pay tons of money to redo all of her certificates with the new last name, she chose just to keep her last name, which is fine, but it’s stupid if you’re doing it just to make a point
Because they see it as a form of submission I suppose.
They don’t want to.
Then they shouldn’t want to be married
No they can’t that’s why we have rules, laws and morals no one can do whatever they want
Why would you get married and not take his name you’re literally planting a land mine in your own marriage 😂
No it won’t
You’re already shooting yourself in the foot if you’re putting your business before the relationship
That’s not a good reason and any business that’s paying taxes isn’t one that has much to offer
1 and I also have a masters in business administration and cash management
I’d be happy to offer financial advice but I don’t come cheap
@creampiekarl420 Why is having the husband's last night even important? She can keep her last name as long as she's a good wife I don't if takes my last name or not. I've seen a married married couple that are together for 40 years still together and the husband doesn't care she doesn't have her last name. It just seems so derisory. Why do care so much about a last name rather than a successful marriage?
@Wonderwhat because she should want to this really shouldn’t be a discussion why would I wife take her husbands name is a silly question so much so that it is damn near rhetorical you ask why because he is her husband it’s that simple
I see your point and it's a good one, but its just many marriages nowadays end in divorce a lot of times for petty reasons. I've seen successful marriages where the woman is more practical, the man is more naturing, and it works out. Times are changing and yes tradition is great and all, but some traditions are better left in the past. It's worth damaging your chances at successful marriage. I respect traditionalism, but I think it's okay if the man is more naturing and caring and the wife is more practical. It's just depends how the relationship between the man and woman goes.
@Wonderwhat marriages last because of cooperation marriages fail today because people marry till they’re bored with it not death til us part you have no clue what happens behind closed doors in anyones marriage but I guarantee an understanding and agreement on has been made for couples who stay together
@Wonderwhat it’s contrary to nature uncooperative women have to marry men who support because they can get one who leads
Can’t
Sorry I was eating cantaloupe and my phone is sticky
@creampiekarl420 she can get a man who leads but she'd rather be the leader in the relationship. compatibility is the most important thing in a successful relationship. she's practical so she has her way of doing her own thing which means she just needs a man to complement her. If the man's a leader her ego and the man's ego will clash and the relationship will fail. It's like on sports team where you have the super star and the people around him who support him. It's like how the doctor needs the nurses. Both roles are important.
So you settle for what you can get
@Wonderwhat why is it more important for a woman to lead than a man?
@Wonderwhat women hate when roles are reversed
@creampiekarl420 see she likes it when she's in charge. This alpha male beta male thing is bs. Women like men who are naturing and caring. It just depends on the woman. "Women like the bad boy" is mostly bs that they push on internet. Don't read bs on the internet. There are women that will still like you even if you don't lead.
@Wonderwhat who said anything about alpha or beta women want men to be men
They are weaker because they let women lead them sounds like a mom not a wife women who refuse to submit to masculine energy have to be with lower testosterone men because you can’t handle the high quality ones the most women want uncooperative women have to settle for guys they could cheat on and they would still stay with you because they’re weak and tolerate disrespect like you not taking their name
Thats what overbearing selfish women who raise boys to be weak men say uncooperative women like you have to settle for yes men ass kissers that you’re eventually gonna divorce
It’s controlling because women become independent and marry weak men because they like getting their way it’s all about them men do it for their families women do it for themselves that’s why it’s controlling the minute those women are inconvenienced in any way they bail
Wym data women are selfish people by nature
Who contributes more to society men or women?
Cry me a River are you gonna answer the question or just keep letting your narcissistic ego go into defense mode
A more accurate question is "Why would a feminist get married in the first place"? Marriage is a traditional institution that is not compatible with feminism.
I almost took my ex wife's last name..
But that's because I'd be Thomas Magnum...
It would have been even better if I'd bought that beachfront condo in Hawaii..
I would see it as a lack of commitment. If she truly believed in us she’d wanna be mine
When was the last time a feminist actually made a valuable contribution to society? They're not terribly bright people, otherwise they'd stay well clear of that poisonous ideology.
I guess they prefer to keep their father's name that their mom adopted.
My ex-wife kept her father’s name because she was the last of her line and the only one to carry on the family name.
Do you know the difference between a Wolf and a Human?
Im not taking questions at the moment get to the point
Wolves Aren’t blinded by emotions. They Hunt And wanna survive. They aren’t Self destructive.
Humans On the other hand are the complete opposite.
Okay
I'm a feminist. I wanna change my name to my mother's. Not because you mentioned it rn. It's just something I've been wanting to do for years.
Name taking is choice. You can't force your name on someone.
You do realize that everyone born has to take their Parents name right so you’d be taking your grandpas name and also that’s not what this is about it’s about a wife submitting to her husband
It's not about submission
I just fucking hate everyone
It literally is what’s so wrong about submission?
Like i said, it's not submission. It's just me.
You should be happy that if you have a daughter, she'd keep your name
If be happy to know she has a man who will take care of her what’s so bad about submitting
There's nothing bad with submission. I may not be submissive, but i understand the value of submission.
I just hate everyone, that's all.
If a man doesn't take it personally, yes I'll marry him
You shouldn’t be married if you think so little of it
Let the man decide :)
Exactly
Not you. I'm talking about my future husband. You won't be it, and we're both more than thrilled about that.
Good
Why does this bother you?
Because it shows a lack of resolve and respect
The husband and the marriage
I thought you meant for whom
Yes she is it’s like we aren’t together if you had a woman wouldn’t you want everyone to know she is yours and yours alone most men don’t want to share a woman they love we are territorial creatures by nature you say you’re my woman and want to married then take my name
How would that be controlling by claiming her as my own
I had plans to take my husband's name but when it came time to changing it I chose not to. I'd rather keep my identity then have to change it just cause I'm married.
You lost your identity the moment you got in a relationship
A confession ( your honor this court is adjourned) score one for the boys back home✌️💯
Oh wow. after seeing some responses here from the blues towards the pinks I am surprised how women as a collective aren't starting to hate men yet.
This is not a feminist thing. This is for every girl, why should they change their name if they don't want to?
If they do, go ahead. If they don't want why should they?
Because they’re getting married and it honors the husband
Why does that honors the husband?
And why can't it be the other way around then to honor the wife?
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 you can honor you’re wife in other ways like being faithful and respecting her men are the head of the family we are supposed to lead women find traditional men way more attractive marriage is sacred and serious and in a marriage husbands and wives have responsibilities for one another they have roles to play
Those traditions have value for some, and I respect that, but no value at all for others.
To the ones that do not want that kind of power dynamic there is no reason to change names.
Only a controlling uncooperative woman would settle for a man like that because she can’t get the one type she truly desires
Women file for divorce 7 times out of 10 for a reason because a uncooperative woman will have to settle and she won’t like it she’ll only be married for as long as she can tolerate
You seem to think all women want the same. That is completely wrong. People are different.
A woman that is not submissive will never want a old fashion man.
It can be for professional reasons, easier for kids prior to this relationship, or just to maintain their identity.
They don’t lose their identity by taking their spouses name
I’m sure it depends on the person but maybe they just like their last name more or maybe they done wanna go through the hassle of changing it.
Then they shouldn’t get married
Well, that’s the decision of the couple.
No it’s an individual decision
Don’t you make decisions together when married? I don't know if I was a guy and it was that big of a deal to me I wouldn’t marry her.
No these are decisions that should be made beforehand
I thought they were. I had to tell what I plan for my name to be when we were going to sign up for the marriage license before we got married.
Hey not to change the subject but do you have an eating disorder also
No I don’t
Why bother changing all your ID if you don’t have to? 🤷♀️
Because you don’t want to die alone
I’m gonna die alone because I don’t want to change my ID?
😂🤣😂🤣
I was being over dramatic because that’s stupid you don’t have to change your Id gynestein🙄
When you legally change your name, you have to get new ID with your new name on it. Otherwise, your ID would not have your proper name on it.
What would make you think that your ID wouldn’t change if your name did?
And what a gynestein?
The fact that I’ve been issued several from government buildings with different names Cus SSA just link names to the number it doesn’t matter if you have the Id or not they already have your information when you get married and I was calling you Einstein ironically but because you’re a woman I called you GYNEstein ( yes I know I’m hilarious)
Do feminists get married? Does anyone want one?
It's nonsense that any of them have to take the husband's surname.
Why so?
Because they are kind of crazy lmao
"Well girls we did it, patriarchy is no more"
Why don´t guys take their wives name?
Because they’re the man of the relationship
NOT!👎😂
because it is the man who leads
in the relationship
Inadequate
I "like" it... lol
Why doesn't husband take their name?
Because he is the husband
What is a husband to you?
Then why wouldn’t you want his name? Do you want to share your husband?
Thats like asking why food with your name on it is yours
Do I really need to explain that to you?
You didn’t even let me explain but instead of saying I don’t understand your inflated ego blamed me grow up ma’am
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