Why can't people respect women's preference or other people's preference/culture for not taking the husband's last name?

[Anonymous]

There was a question about taking husband's lastname and everyone who does not agree with it, get insulted as feminazi, weirdo etc. First of all it is just a preference. Second of all in some religions and middleeastern cultures it is prefered that women do Not take husband's lastname and it can be even a sin. Third of all, if you can't respect people's preferences or cultures, do not expect from others to respect your (American christian) culture. Would you like it when people called you a weirdo, an American retard, cuntservative, weirdo etc just because you prefere to take your husband's lastname? I am middleeastern but i also live in western country where you both can keep your last names when you marry. The point of marriage is getting support by the state so the young couple do not financially struggle when they get kids. So far i also know it is also disadvantage for men if the partners take their last name due to alimony when divorce happen but i am not sure about this. So why would any man want this if this is true?


I am also sorry for sounding rude and i apologize if i offend anyone with this post.

Updates

1 y

It is perfectly ok if you prefere to take your husband's lastname and i just wonder why many people are so intolerant towards people who dont prefere to take the husband's lastname in my experience with gag community. It is anecdotal and i can't generalize, of course. This why I may be wrong and why i only saw intolerant people due to bad timing etc.

[TonyMetal___86]

There was like 2 same questions about this matter and your the 3rd one asking the same question, if you have read the same previous question than you know my opinion and why a woman must hold her husband's family name after marriage...

It's not something by choice, it's something that must be done after marriage or your considered to never got married and here i'm talking about a real church marriage...

If your talking about civil marriage than your free and if they gave you the choice to keep your family name than your free too and respect your freedom of choice but when you ask me for my opinion, i'll tell you that i'm totally against it and would never consider to love or marry a girl who have these rotten feminist ideology because no one mentioned or even bothered to talk about such topic other then the feminists, google it and you will see that they were the 1st ones to bring this subject to the table...

I cannot control people or order them what they can or can't do and i'm not from this type of men, i respect your freedom, in the end if you chose to keep your family name or not, that's your business with your husband and it doesn't matter or effect me...

If you ask for my opinion than expect to get a rough answer cause i'm not from these males who say yes and why not for everything that a female says...

Women should be aware that their still some real men who exists and not all men are the same...

[Asker]

I did not see the other questions

[TonyMetal___86]

Well i answered your question and i'll send you the link to my answer to the other same question...

[Asker]

You mean feminazis. It is just a preference. This is like calling men meninazis for not taking her last name. And as you said it is christian thing. In other religions like islam you can't or should not take your husband's lastname. I also respect your preference

[Asker]

Muslims are also very conservative and traditional and they are not feminazis for not taking the men's last name

[Asker]

As i said i really respect your preference and i am sorry if i was offensive

[Asker]

By the way thank you for replying in a nice way.

[TonyMetal___86]

I'm from a middle eastern country and all muslim friends whether they are sunni's or shiite it's the same as us, the women took their husband's family name...

I really don't know from where did you come up with this rule, that muslim women do not have to hold their husband's family name...

I'm laughing because if you said this in front of sheikh, he will curse you!

Please fix your information and if your a muslim than there must be something wrong because muslims aren't like that at all...

No christian or muslim or jewish or i don't know what allow the wife not hold her husband's family name except the civil marriage which is man made...

You can't call me a meninazi because these rules are sacred and i didn't come up with these rules by my own why feminazis wants to twist god's words and just fight everything related to men such as why men can walk topless and women can't and from here they came up with the "free the nipples movement" that is just one of their corrupted examples...

Your not offensive and thanks for respecting my opinion, like i said that in the end your free to do what ever you want but i'm not someone who supports this subject...

[Asker]

islamqa.info/.../why-a-woman-should-not-take-her-husband146s-surname

[Asker]

I know muslims who do that and are you even muslim? Just because your muslim friends do that does not mean it is correct in islam. I am laughing at you for your anecdotal statements. It is s christian thing and you should not imitate christans or other religions, since then you became kufr

[TonyMetal___86]

Here's the other same questions...

Is taking the man's last name in marriage outdated? ↗

Would you be offended if your partner doesn't want to take your last name in marriage? ↗

[Asker]

Are you indirectly calling feminazi for twisting god's words although i am not

[Asker]

These fake sheikhs and muslims are twisting the god's words and not the so called feminazis

[Asker]

https://youtu.be/TAOjfWUul3g

[TonyMetal___86]

What my friends are doing is wrong? 😂😂
You mean what happens in the mosques is wrong? They all got married strictly following what quran says...

I'm not a muslim but that doesn't mean that i don't know what the muslims does and how they are married...

Your surprising me about your thoughts and from where your getting these infos...

Muslims are stricter than us christians when it comes to husband and wife and you know that a muslim wife should obey her husband and does his wishes and if a muslim is an extremist, well you know better than what a wife means to him and how's she treated!

My muslim friends are decent people and they are all graduates and they got married and had a normal marriage and here they are, all their wives holds their family names and your the 1st muslim person who comes and tell me that a muslim woman shouldn't hold her husband's family name...

Anyways i won't argue with you anymore because your jusy twisting the facts and pretending not to be a feminist while it's clear that you're one...

I gave you my opinion and you game yours, let's just stick to our beliefs and you do what suits you and i'll do what suits me...

[Asker]

Look too many muslims dont know their religions correctly which is ok since everyone do mistakes. I was rude for calling your friends fake but it made angry for accusing me for not knowing my family's religions and when i was in ton of mosques. In the mosques you get islamically married but this has nothing to do with changing your surname

[Asker]

"Abu Tharr narrated that he heard the Prophet saying: “There is no man who claims to be the son of any other than his real father knowingly except that he disbelieves in Allaah and whoever claims to belong to some folk to whom he does not belong, then let him take his place in Hellfire.”
Ibn Daqeeq Al-‘Eed said in his book 'Ihkaam Al-Ahkaam': “This Hadeeth is evidence that it is forbidden to deny one’s known family lineage and to be traced back to someone else’s lineage, and there is no doubt that this is a grave major sin as this leads to great disadvantages.” "- you should only have the surname of your dad, and not your husband!

[Asker]

It is un-Islamic to change ones family name. It is clear in our Islamic traditions that female companions, including, Beloved Fatima, Ayesha, Khadija and all the mothers of the believers remained known by their OWN family names and none of them switched to Zauja Muhammad SAW or Banu Hashim or Quraysh

[Asker]

This is strongly cultural not Islamic your muslim friends confuse culture with religion where even muslim thinks that's religious. In quran it says every one will be called from his father name. We all use sur name as our fathers or family name.
There is no such thing in Islam where woman have to take her husbands name

[Asker]

So the wives of the prophets are feminazis for not taking the husband's lastname by your logic? What the actual fuck. You are just insulting prophet's wives. If this makes me a feminist for telling the truth then i am feminist

[Asker]

majority of scholars agree on staying with hers surname. Society and culture makes it a big deal. Islamically, a wife stays with her parent's name.
Example of proof :

Khadija bnt khuwailid.. Not bn Muhammad.

Fatima bnt Muhammad... Not bn Ali.

Aisha bnt Abubakr... Not Muhammad. And so on.

These are names of married women of our ummah.. Mothers of the believers and women of paradise, non of them has the name of their husbands at the end. Not even Muhammad himself

[Asker]

You dont know anything about marriage in islam.

[TonyMetal___86]

As you wish, i'm not an expert in islam but all the islams in my country who are married, their wives holds their family name...

I can't argue with you about your religion cause for sure you know better but there must be something wrong because i never heard a single sheikh saying what these guys have said in your videos, maybe they have their own reference...

Personally for me a wife who doesn't holds her husband's family name ain't really married and they aren't even a family...

If the girl wants to keep her father's name than she better not get married and stay in her parents house...

People have different beliefs, i can't force you to follow mine and you can't force me to follow yours, we are free in what we want to believe, if such teachings suits than so be it, i respect your decision and your beliefs and for sure i have my own beliefs too, you will search for someone who have the same beliefs as yours and i'll search for someone who have the same beliefs as mine and that's perfectly fine and the world can fit us all...

[TonyMetal___86]

In your last comment, your not telling ME that i don't know about islam cause you might be right but your calling thousands and maybe millions of islams that they don't know their religion, without mentioning all the sheikhs and muftis...

Your problem is with them and not with me so good luck to you!

I'm not the one whom you should be giving all these explanations to, these interpretations should be given to all muslim men and women who got married and are holding their husband's family name, all the arab countries are like that so you must consider fighting them all to prove your point of view...

Your fight ain't with me because like i said, i respect your belief no matter what it is and you come from another religion so i can't argue with you, which means that your fight is with other muslims who might not share with you the same beliefs, that's all...

[Asker]

Oh ok. I just give you the sources because i thought you asked for it. I really dont care how other muslims practice their religion. I am just pointing out what the hadiths and quran says. I dont want to fight anyone and too many muslims mistake culture with islam. However, many muslims know that they should do what the prophet muhammed did (=this is called sunnah so far i know) and he does not make her wife take his surname. Furthermore, the prophet's wives did not even take their husbands name as I said.

[Asker]

His wife**

[TonyMetal___86]

Maybe your right, like i said that your argument ain't with me because i come from a different background and from another religion and my beliefs are different than yours...

You already knew my opinion and i know yours, i wish you luck in your life and to find someone like you...

You have your own life and your living it the way you chose to live it and i have my own life and i'm living it the way i chose to live it...

I respect your freedom and your path and you will respect my freedom and my path, that's all!

A lot of muslims might not be following the quran the way they should and there are many christians too who do not follow the bible the way they should so in the end this is the human nature and we are all different...

[TonyMetal___86]

Tnx for the mho

[Northernlights25]

Strange how this question is suddenly everywhere. But I don't have to respect anything. In my opinion it's silly and only stems from a place of egoism. It's unnecessary. It's been a tradition since ages past and from a Christian perspective it's no more than theGod's ordained way since the man leads the household. You also shouldn't boil Christianity down to being American, Christianity exists globally and has been the largest Faith for centuries. I'm Swedish myself. Lastly, your definition of marriage is very odd; "The point of marriage is getting support by the state so the young couple do not financially struggle when they get kids" No? The state supporting childcare is just a function to help married couples starting a family. Since when has marriage itself ever been about getting childsupport. Marriage has historically and secularly been about love, and politics, and power. In Christendom it's a Holy Union between man and woman to mirror the relationship between Christ and the Church on earth.

[Asker]

Why is it strange lol. I did not boil christianity down American. I said it is christian American thing to change your lastname since in many european countries you can keep both your lastnames and in middleeastern countries it is disliked to change your last name lol.

[Northernlights25]

It's strange because one question seems to spark it like some obsession so that every other gager asks it for weeks. And alright, but it sounded like you did in phrasing it: "do not expect from others to respect your (American christian) culture" like the American phalanx specifically did this. And yes, in some countries a woman's maiden name may appear as a double-last name but it doesn't negate that her family name is the man's following marriage. I didn't know Middle Easterners disliked it though.

[PadyFrogette]

Most professional females take their degrees whilst they are single, whether it be a Medical degree, Legal Degree, Engineering etc so their degree will always show their Maiden name.
In France and a lot of Napoleon countries a females legal name is her Maiden name, which will be on her ID Card and Passport, when they get married their ID will be Miss Maiden name Wife of Husband's Name on ID and Passport.

[CindyRuns]

I hear you...

I sort of did a mix when I got married, I still use my maiden name professionally and in some contexts and in others, I use my husband's last name.

My passport and drivers license both have my maiden name on it !!!

I've had people tell me "make up your mind" ... my answer... it's none of your business !!!

[OlderAndWiser]

1. Everyone is entitled to have and to express their opinions. None of them were trying to control your behavior, were they?

2. "The point of marriage is getting support by the state so the young couple do not financially struggle when they get kids." I dn't know where you live but that is WAY off the mark for the US.

3. "So far i also know it is also disadvantage for men if the partners take their last name due to alimony when divorce happen but i am not sure about this." In the US, your thought on this matter is absolutely wrong.

[Asker]

Ok thanks for the reply but i read comments where women (/men) get called feminazis or weirdos. Yes everyone is entitled to express their opinions and my behaviour ain't controlled. Where the hell did i say the opposite? I just dont understand the point of insulting people due to their preferences. Whatever. As i said you can prefere what you want and i respect it

[OlderAndWiser]

I have unfavorable opinions about some people and I keep them to myself, unless I am asked, and then I'll tell you what I think. If somebody doesn't want to hear honest opinions, they shouldn't ask.

[Asker]

If honest "opinions" are insults like feminazi, weirdos then keep it for yourself lol

[Aethereal]

I personally accept that it's a preference. A girl is free to decide not to want her husband's last name. However, I can only respect her choice if she is willing to respect the guy's choice to not get married to her as a result. I want my wife to either take my last name, or we make a new one together. That is my preference. The relationship doesn't need to end due to this difference in opinion. It is wrong for outsiders to insist that one or the other back down. Both preferences are equally deserving of respect.

As with choices, preferences have consequences. We must consider and accept the consequences of our preferences rather than get defensive/rude/entitled, as many people tend to do.

[Leonharted]

I abstained from that question because I don't really care what some stranger chooses to do. That said, if we were getting married, I'd insist on you taking my last name to the point that I'd be willing to end the relationship if you weren't willing to do so (no point in wasting each other's time). Just as every woman is free to not take my last name in marriage, I am free to not marry that person.

[Asker]

I respect your preference. What i mean is why people get so hateful and just people for not having the same preference.

[Leonharted]

Dunno. Many people in the world aren't nearly as tolerant as they claim to be.

[ShaTTeredMasterpeace]

Because it's GaG and no one here knows how to agree to disagree without being disrespectful. I'm not a woman that wants to take on a man's last name. Our kids will have his last name but I just don't feel like it's necessary or that it makes rhe marriage less sacred or valued because of that.

[Pyrofox]

I think it would far more interesting if we all when we get married just swapped last names. >w< It would make the whole idea of having like in law parents and or siblings seem more on a even playing field.

[Asker]

This would be soo cool haha

[jasco]

Well me personally, I am conservative so I would really like to have my girl used my last name. Makes things less complicated when it comes to business matters. Marriage/kids wise I feel like when your married and have kids its better to have one last name for them as well. Cause if you both keep your names than, what about the kids and their last names? School and anything else that requires last names can become confusing however thankfully technology is slowly becoming better and data management is also becoming better. So who knows. I am conservative so yea if a woman wants to keep her last name than I hope she finds a husband who does the same.

[InventorofWarp]

I don't really see a whole lot what culture has to do with this. I have a close friend who is married and she still has her maiden name. We're both Canadians. I'm a Protestant but she's not religious.

[Asker]

Oh cool. I just mentioned it because so many people think thst everyone do it.

[IMuser]

The simplest answer is: if something is drilled in your head, then even if something is logically correct, it's difficult to get over it.

Solution: if not changing your surname is important for you, look for someone else because as humans age, it's difficult to change opinion (because it makes them question their reality)

[Asker]

I really respect almost every preferences but i dont understand the point of insulting just because of having different preferences

[IMuser]

People have an inherent need to be perceived as right. Sometimes, it takes the form of "pushing it down their throat"

This approach is not right, nor it is wrong. It is human. You can accept it or fight back, the result will be same.

Makes sense?

[yulbsari]

There are SO many other more important considerations in marriage than taking someone's last name... like finances, philosophies regarding child rearing (if you plan to have kids), interactions/issues with extended family, cultural differences, etc. This is why I think that THOROUGH premarital counseling is ESSENTIAL because once you do it, it will be too late to go back! Then, you will experience the HELL of divorce and custody disputes! GET EVERYTHING OUT ON THE TABLE FIRST!!!

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Same reason why why people can't respect men's preference for not getting married or just wanting a relationship without marriage. We care more about the risk marriage have than to just change your last names.

[Asker]

Loool this is fair but has to that to with the topic.

[Asker]

Tbh if it was illegal for men to waste women's bodycount and youth and for women to use men's majority of momey, then i would agree. HOWEVER marriage is the only way to know that guy ain't using you for sex etc since it is senseless to use women for sex but then divorce them

[Asker]

since divorce is very antiman

[Asker]

As long as women will be seen undesireable and not dateable after her 30s, to not expect from women to respects your preferences that may destroy her whole life. So i do make a difference between preferences and preferences

[Asker]

You could date a woman for many years till she loose her youth and became undesireable and broke up with her without consequences while nobody give a shit about your age when it comes to dating.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Yet it favors women in lots of ways. https://youtu.be/zO9nUBazWEg if it's illegal to use men for money, a legal way to do it is to get married then file for a divorce. Now before you say men are selfish for not wanting to get married, i can ask what selfish reason do you have why marriage is a must? To make sure he don't cheat? TBH it goes both ways only with people believing in women more.

[Asker]

So a relationship without marriage may be a disaster for the woman when the guy broke up with her but so is marriage risky and become a disaster when woman divorce

[Asker]

So a relationship without marriage may be a disaster for the woman when the guy broke up with her but so is marriage risky and become a disaster for men when woman divorce

[Aiko_E_Lara]

If its hard enough for men at their prime to get a date, you can't expect a 40 year old to have it easy. Its very risky to hit on a girl at that age

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Some may succeed but the rest may end up in jail or homeless. 30 year old women rarely get the stigma for hitting on younger guys. Tho its harder to find, they still have a very little risk compared to guys on their 30s

[Asker]

Why would you need to hit much younger women in your 40s+? You could date a 30s years old woman when you are at 40 and nobody would question this. But for women this is not possible. 30s years old men dont similarly aged women. So a 40 years old woman can't date a 30 years old men or 40 years old men when they could get younger women.
And tbh young men would not want anything serious with way older women. This is why milf is a thing. This is my personal opinion of course.

[Asker]

I can't generalize of course

[Asker]

What? Why would you end up in jail? How young you mean? A 40 years old man can date 25 years old woman for example since it is legal? What is the age of consent where you live?

[Asker]

I swear there is no solution for both women and men lol

[Asker]

Ok sorry for spamming you but when your husband cheat, you still cab get your justice with alimony but nothing happens when your boyfriend dates you for 10 years and cheat on you when you loose your youth and so became a "leftovers" due to age. I also so no point of cheating on your wife since divorce is "antiman" . Why would any man cheat on their wifes at this point? This makes no sense. I also can understand when men dont want to marry since marriage is risky since women could divorce them for no reason to get alimony and destroy his dating value and life. I swear there is no solution

[Asker]

"Now before you say men are selfish for not wanting to get married, i can ask what selfish reason do you have why marriage is a must? To make sure he don't cheat? TBH it goes both ways only with people believing in women more."-

Women are selfish for wanting marriage but so are you/men selfish for not marrying due to reasons i explain. As i said there is no solution in my opinion lool

[Asker]

We are all selfish which is ok to an extent in my opinion

[Aiko_E_Lara]

It's programmed that guys likes the most fertile woman so do women wanting the most fertile man. It's biologically hardwired and even girls on their 30s may want to date guys on their 20s. Sure there are also older guys who would choose woman on their 30s but most of the time, they're either married, in a relationship or not interested in older men at all. Youth is also a factor to men's attractiveness. Not only that but also the social stigma like how society just presumes it's the man's fault. So that doesn't really explain how guys are selfish for not wanting to get married when both get the same consequences when unmarried. This isn't a matter of opinion but a matter of facts. More men in general are single which also means it's not easy for them to just cheat even when unmarried.

Before you say people don't take MILF's seriously then what about Gay porn? What about teen porn? Like every other porn category exist. Even porn about potatoes exist but that doesn't make up the majority of the world who who treats them seriously.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

here's another truth about marriage https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2MPp_YY3_YQ

[Asker]

Of course men in their mid 20s are more attractive than much older guys due to fertility, looks, youth but it is not a big factor when it comes to dating world. Men's stability, strengh, money are more important so fair i know. Lets be honest a 30 years old wealthy man could get way and way more partners than wealthy women in her 30s. Maybe i am wrong since it is just my personal opinion. i dont know any guy in his 20s who would date a wealthy but older women haha but this is anecdotal and my experience. All of this is my opinion and i can't speak for majority of people. Some guys also told me that age does not matter as long as she looks attractive but i dont know how many guys think like that. Your last point do makes sense

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Wait that's not the video. I found it somewhere. I guess it was deleted but it did had lots of views. But yeah you can always search for another factor. There are just so many other factor why it's such a great disadvantage. Not getting married and cheated on impacts a guy just as much unless the consequence for women getting cheated on unmarried affects her job, financial status, house and more.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

So do 30 year old women specially for guys not wanting kids. Which is why MILFs still exist. "i dont know any guy in his 20s who would date a wealthy but older women haha but this is anecdotal and my experience." I can also tell you an experience of what I witness that counter acts that.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

All are anecdotes really and the last point i said doesn't take a genius. If you like to talk about MILF because they don't take them seriously then that would be have been the case for everything because every porn category exist.

[Asker]

Not all of my points are anecdotal wtf. I can post statistics, studies etc if you want. What do you mean? Maybe i misunderstood you.
It does not take a genius to know that many (childless) men dont want single mums aka milfs. there are some men who want milfs since they dont want kids but majority of men do want kids lol and lets be honest even on gag single mums are insulted, get hated etc. I am sure some/many would like to have ons with milfs due to lust but not have serious relationship and porn give these men this fantasy.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

So do single dads getting hated and it doesn't always take a 30 year old to be a single father. A random girl can accuse any man of being the father and he has 30 days to prove he isn't. www.courts.ca.gov/1202.htm Go post your statistics if you want so I can debunk it for you. Also i just said "specially for guys not wanting kids" excuse me but did I say most guys don't want kids? What i'm saying is there are still a lot of men who don't but I never said they're the majority.

[Asker]

He has 30 days to prove? Which law and country does that? No wtf. You can accuse anyone of everything but without proof nothing happens in Europe at least

[Aiko_E_Lara]

It doesn't even have to be majority of guys choosing MILFs. What im saying it's still very possible. Just like most girls prefer guys around their age not guys who are too old. Even if you say women have it harder looking for dates at that age let's pretend, I can just say it's a slight difference but it doesn't involve losing everything for the woman compared to married men.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Happening in California. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ucR-1NodAs&t=213s You can skip at 0:32 but ofcourse you can watch the whole thing to see how many women can get away with. To top it off, look at the views

[UsernameXLTX]

Most users on GAG are from western countries, where women taking her husband's last name is common. I don't believe we are disrespecting any other cultures bc we aren't in the Middle East or aware of their traditions. The comments are from a Western POV.

[tommyvegas7618]

Anyone know how much work it takes to change it if you get divorced? It's a shit ton of paper work. I like the idea, personally, of having her take my name, but wouldn't insist on it if she didn't want to.

[Slartybartfast]

First, a women doesn't "lose" her name! She just gains another..

Jane Doe married Mr Smith is now Jane Doe Smith..

I almost took my ex wifes last name so I'd be Thomas Magnum..

[Ez-Bri-Z]

Not sure why it is such a big deal if a woman doesn't take the last name. It's kind of a pain in the butt to get it done and it doesn't make them any less married even if she doesn't take it.

[ChiTown33]

What do you mean I could care less what other people do. I probably wouldn't do it. But I don't care if others do it that way.

[Asker]

Read the update lol. I just saw some people calling everyone weirdo, feminazi etc for not taking the last name of husband. This is what i meant This just confused me. Whatever thanks for the replies

[ChiTown33]

And they're allowed to have that opinion. I know it may bother you but there are social norms. When you break them you WILL pay the price overall.

[Asker]

So can i have my opinion wtf and i just said i was confused due hateful "opinions". So if i call you a cu*ntservative , it is an opinion for you? Would you like it when people were intolerant towards you? As i said i was just confused and am i not allowed to be confused. Like wtf. I dont care what kind of opinions they have as long as i have the right to react
What price? This is ridiculous.

[Asker]

Whatever. Thanks for the reply. It is senseless to discuss

[ChiTown33]

I agree it's senseless to discuss. Because at the end of the day those that will have a problem with it will still have a problem with it. As I said. I personally don't care what anyone does. I have enough time judging my own life with worrying about others. All I'm saying is I know that humans are social creatures. We'll always have gender norms. Females are expected to do this. And men are expected to do this. And when you go outside the norm you will be judged in general by the collective. Because they feel if they're held to a set of standards so must you be.

[Jintendo18]

Saying you don’t want your husband’s last name is like saying that you don’t consider yourself part of his family (even though you are, and so are your children) yet you expect entitlement to his assets should you decide to change your mind on a whim one day.

[Asker]

This is how you interpret. I really dont understand why people get offended by it. It is christian American and not everyone has to follow this culture

[Jintendo18]

Then hyphenate your maiden name like is done in Hispanic culture if you insist. To not take his last name at all is not right if you have any understanding whatsoever of the concept of marriage.

[Asker]

It is not about me. The concept of marriage is not same everywhere and in european like italy, austria etc you dont even change your last name aka both can keep their surnames

[Asker]

**.. european countries like... you dont have to

[Asker]

Do you also whether it is a disadvantage for men to let their partners take their last names or not?

[Asker]

So far i know a man has to pay alimony when divorce happen and when woman have his last name

[KatherineJ]

Girl, you have to do what you feel is right for you! Don’t let anyone insult you because you make/made the decision to keep your name. It is your identity, no one else’s!

[Tstrbrainer]

I don't agree with the last point, as I don't think that spouse not taking the guy's last name will benefit the guy in any way

[Asker]

Last point?

[Tstrbrainer]

Divorce and alimony thing

[Asker]

You can't get alimony if you dont take his last name but i am not sure about this and I am not talking about child support. I am talking about alimony only for your ex spouses

[Tstrbrainer]

Well, I'm not sure. Anyway that's not how it works in my country, I guess

[AdithyaR]

I always feel it's better to not take each others names, stuff like degrees and certificates etc are going to be in the persons original name, makes things complicated in my opinion.

[notwoke]

as soon as I come across a woman with a hypenated last name or some bullshit like that, I know I am dealing with an upetty, emasculating cunt and I keep her at a 10 ft distance and keep myself guarded well