I just love how people from the Victorian area had actual respect and well behaved. I must admit I hate my own generation as how trashy people my own age no longer have self values. Apparently people called you a Karen just because you choose to followed the rulers.
Yeah- I used to feel the same way, and then I thought… no… how much better to *not be forced in any direction* or system, but to have the actual right to choose it for yourself, if that’s what you believe in. If anything, see it like this- it shows you the “true colors,” of all the male and female bastards 🤭 out and about 💆♀️🧏♀️😂
I think the only thing good about those times, was that women were naturally affectionate to men- which allowed them to be sensitive and to open up, and men knew women’s passionate fragility, and offered no ridicule, but defense and some proper courtesy.
Nowadays, we see bastards galore, but men are feeling pressured to seal-in, go gay, or blow up at women and women are feeling the urge to act on passionate emotions, go lesbian, and try to gain some leverage to keep rude men at bay.
It’s sad because they’re only really allowing society to harm them in those aspects.
There really is no sense of “Community,” as I see it, but at least I personally see everything 👁, and I’m not obligated to carry a tissue, fan, and ankle-length box of a gown, to appease someone somewhere.. and to prevent a bunch of people from staring at me from atop their noses👃 lol
Manners would be nice as well as both genders being predictable and knowing social etiquette.
It's fine to learn from the past and apply what's relevant today. The problem lies with people wanting to just copy the past... functional and dysfunctional patterns alike. I agree with the value of mutual respect, yet we won't get it if we don't give it. Strictly following the rules of a book doesn't allow for flexibility and respect for a person's uniqueness. Not only that, the authors of the old books are just as bad as the authors of self-help books today. They imply a one-size-fits-all approach, which marginalized those who might not fit into that mold. Taking relationships slowly can allow us to see the real person, rather than see only what we want to see or what the other presents to be seen. Of course, this requires clear, open honesty from people, and that is hard to find. There are positives and negatives to all eras, so let's cherry-pick from all times and follow what is functional for the situation and considerate of all who may be impacted.
There were definitely some things that were worth carrying forward from that era, but I wouldn't want to re-live it in its entirety. There was still way too much intolerance, bigotry and class delineation, though things have only changed slightly today in that regard.
I agree there seem to be a lot more unclassy, uncouth, mannerless, selfish, trashy people with little respect for others in today's world than I pictured in that era. However, that could just be conjecture on my part. Today, due to social media and instant everything, we're much more blatantly aware of it.
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u Victorian era may be a bit too much. 1950's values were decent.
Couldn't agree with you any more. Today's generation absolutely disgusts me honestly. Their imorality is rampant. It's not a generation I want to be apart of. My heart longs for bygone eras.
I take that sentiment to the fullest. Which is why I dress only vintage clothing, take up their pasttimes with classical learning, collect antiques, and I try to behave properly and abide by a strict moral code.
I've even deleted a lot of my social media because of the degeneracy that goes on in many of those spaces. Eventually I want to further limit my cell-phone use and internet use.
@Alwayreckles93 No. Merely because someone is polite/ well mannered doesn't mean they are a good person nor a good fit for me. @Jackblue basically said this in his comment too.
We can choose to be what we want.
Everyone is entitled to living out life as they choose.
It doesn't make them trashy/lesser or wrong for having a different way of life. @Alwayreckles93 @Rosexøxø
I think @caring__1 left a great comment that should be read and thought about.
I don't think everything that is old is better
I don't think everything that is new is better
There are a lot people choosing to be uncourteous or inconsiderate
But not everyone is like that.Some people have a lot of good in their heart and show it even in the worse of times.They show it even when it is severely inconvenient.
People are involved in different ideas and walks; find someone that wants to walk where you are headed. @Alwayreckles93
You want to go back to the times when women dreamt about being courted by the man with the most slaves or servants? And when 90+% of children in London were employed in industrial positions where they were beaten, molested and treated like shit? These company owners are the men that Victorian women swooned over. Also once they married you, essentially women became men's property.
I'm really shocked how after covid and this destroyed economy, now women want all these non-feminist dating situations and 'traditional' men to court and woo them. Get the fuck outta my face with this shit and go *study*, then go *get a job*, men today are no longer here to worship women and support, maintain and prop you up anymore. That's over hun.
I think there was greater respect both ways between guys and gals in that era than now. Certainly there were more constraints but those constraints were intended and did act to create strong family units. Both guys and girls could marry with more certainty than they can possibly do so now.
So yeah I think guys and gals were better off in that era in many ways.
You would be surprised there are still many good people out there IRL who can't be bothered by social media which is nothing but toxic miserable trolls hating on everyone and their far left beliefs which its been over a year and i have still yet to see a man giving birth 😂😂
Take it out of your head as if times of the past were better when it comes to marriage and dating.
People only like to highlight to what they perceived to be to their liking and favor.
Dating now vs dating of the past is the same.
Decent people have good dating experiences and dirt bags offer bad dating experiences.
Era is irrelevant.
Sure, let's bring back the tuberculosis epidemic, Carbolic acid poisoning, radium poisoning, ammonia, arsenic and lead laced cosmetic. Divorce was illegal so men literally sold their wives they didn't want any more. Don't forget about the baby farms and child exploitation. Forced hysterectomies for women that were deemed insane. Married women did not have the legal right to own property...
On the surface, Victorians were prime and proper, but underneath they got into all kinds of crazy stuff. CS Lewis who went to boarding school just after the Victorian period talked about how weird things were there. Everyone kept their coats buttoned and knew when to take off their hat, but a good appearance is not the same as good conduct.
It may have been a time when there was a lot of STDs and that was the way religion was able to greatly reduce STDs.
Most of these are quite reasonable. I used a three-month no-kissing rule and people act like I'm insane.
Also, fun fact the chivalric code forbade rape so... yeah I don't think chivalry has ever truly been alive.
There are aspects I do still value and do pursue about this era. Courtship, being a gentleman but also expecting the woman to be a lady. Modesty, long-term intentions etc. I'd not want to reinstitute the full rigidity of those days, such as considering ankles showing as porn, that'd complicate beach days, but I do believe modern day dating has been cheapened immensily to the point of being trashy and uncouth.
Women tend to date/marry respectable good guys with good jobs and manners back then. Nowadays almost no women want guys like that while they are young, those guys are seemed boring. Most women I have seen will hate and find it cringy if a guy writes them a letter or a poem.
There are still plenty of good people out there, you just have to know where to look.
A woman wants to go back to the Victorian era?
Maybe, but not the whole "you can't live together unless you are married" part. The only way to know if you can live together is to live together
I agree with @OlderAndWiser
Hmm good idea.. and i agreed people nowadays are meh
They are probably better then whatever this nonsense has become.
You only these:
- Be nice, and try to make other people day's a little bit better.
- Embrace gender differences as good.
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