How can men and women work together to dismantle toxic masculinity and promote equality?

Question

#InternationalMensDay

GOLDFISH_smile · Accepted Answer

By holding your peers accountable. If you hear your friends make sexist jokes or assumptions about women OR MEN then call it out. Doesn't have to be aggresive—u can just say that's not true & redirect to a non-sexist convo or humor instead!

I done this b4 with my husband, he was venting about his sister & suddenly said a very out of character& sexist insult. I stopped him & asked what he meant (did not say he was wrong/sexist, bc I know he's not sexist so he will realize that what he said was wrong if he thinks about it). He tried to explain, realized the reasoning behind the insult didn't hold up, & stopped for a minute to figure out what he really meant & how he could explain it better.

With my friends they don't care nearly as much as he does to be very aggressively called out, & in fact prefer that in most cases bc it sorta "breaks the tension" & they can start over without worrying about ruining the mood bc I either slammed it so far it bounces back, or the mood prolly needed to be ruined anyway. Like once my friend complained about "men" & I gasped & called her sexist for over generalizing. She looked so surprised & then the nearest male friend demanded an apology on behalf of all men, she apologized, & then they high fived & we moved on with the convo. 🤷‍♀️

It doesn't have to be a big serious deal every time even a little bit of sexism pops up. Most of it is accidental so just bringing it to their attention is enough. If it's not, then they're actually sexist & ull need to have that serious talk, but usually it's not needed ime.

Gwendoline · Accepted Answer

I'd rather dismantle toxic feminism or feminity. That is how many toxic women feel the need to attack men for no reason

BCRanger10 · Accepted Answer

For one thing, by dropping "toxic masculinity" from their vocabulary. Like "feminism", no one knows what it is. They have to accept, understand, and embrace that men are just naturally more competitive and aggressive. Those are NOT bad things. Sure, men can be pretty cruel to each other, but a lot of the time, there's a good reason for it or it's in good fun.

For another, they can stop obsessing over "equality". Men and women ARE NOT equal. Not only are they different physically, but they are also different in heart, mind, and soul. They have different and unique gifts, talents, and abilities. They also have unique flaws and shortcomings. They want different things. Things resonate differently with them. These differences and these unique attributes about them make each generally better suited for certain roles in society over the other. None of this should be cause for jealousy, resentment, or envy between them. It should be celebrated. The only "equality" that they ought to worry themselves with is how they treat each other, which is wirh dignity and respect.

Think about it like this. The Battle Hymn of the Republic. The lyrics traditionally read "He hath sounded forth the trumpet that shall never call retreat, He is sifting out the hearts of men before His Judgment Seat." Today, they read "He is sifting out the human hearts/hearts of all." How is anyone supposed to be inspired by THAT? This obsession with equality has just flattened and dulled us.

Maybe_Maybe_not · Accepted Answer

Toxic is a problematic term because it's a code, this term preaches the already converted and throws the others off the ship. I'd use a more formal term: Essentialism

Essentialism consists in attributing an essence, a fixed state, to a person, a group, human race, anything at all. Attributing a fixed state to a specific group such as a gender. It says: Men should behave like this, Women should behave like that, BECAUSE they are born to become this or born to become that. Now, some people will fight fiercely to incarnate and/or attribute a fixed state to any gender because that's their core belief, that's essential in their personal construction and/or in their culture. With such people, I think any negotiation is really improbable.

With all the others though, it is negotiated, talked about, reflected through upbringing, between peers, at school, etc. There's a lot of work to do, which is done more or less automatically, when one has a positive experience in relation to genders.

However when one has an experience that is consistently negative... Things get complicated. As it means that one has to get out of this temptation to generalize views based on personal experience, that's a tough call. Sometimes too tough when a saturation point has been hit, unfortunately.

MisterWack · Answer

“How can men and women work together to dismantle toxic masculinity and promote equality?”

The fact is, we should strive towards love, support, appreciation, and positive affection towards men. We should lay down the culture wars, gender wars, and focus on the person behind the screen / behind the masculinity mask. I will admit I was quick to judge, quick to hate, quick to throw labels along with being naive about subjects and refusing to do my own research especially when it went against my pre-thought notions….

I do want to say toxic masculinity is derived from perceived male role models that try to prey on insecure men who can’t find their way in life / feel there is no place for them. These “role models” are only out for money in terms of exposure, selling masculinity courses, and getting viewer retention…. They don’t care if you don’t get lady action or a meaningful intimate warm loving relationship, they only care about money, popularity, and viewer retention.
It is similar to dating apps in a sense, the app company doesn’t care if you get a match though they do care when they can make it profitable for them while you go on numerous failed dates making you feel stressed, overwhelmed, not loved, and there is no one out there for you…. Think about that in terms of alpha male influencers peddling their snake oil on what a real man is then you have all you need to know.

ohsheeT · Answer

I've never had a problem with that it's because I treat the woman as if she's a woman as if she's my equal she's there to do the job so am I if I can help her I'm going to help her because that's going to help me succeed too and vice versa there's no competition there's no somebody better than somebody else it's called respect friendship your team you make it work today the best you can both be there sometimes you have to exaggerate a little bit and save this person did this or this person did that if they didn't because your team it all works out in the long run but if you're not happy at your job you're not happy anywhere

FoxnEagle · Answer

Need to agree on what constitutes "toxic masculinity." The term gets thrown around as much as "feminism" does, yet peoples definitions of it vary wildly; waves of feminism have even become recognized.

I think most people can agree on certain "toxic" traits like a man beating his wife, his kids, his dog, etc. to establish superiority and assigning that as masculinity. As for dismantling it, making men's only spaces again will temper a lot of that, education will help prevent, and therapy will help recover.

Also, huh, men's day is a thing? We really just have a day for everything, don't we...
Unfortunately, unlike International Taco Day, I doubt I get a discount on my responsibilities as a man; guess I'll celebrate it by doing what I always do, go to work, and do my job q_(0_0)_p

dragoblack · Answer

1 stop with blanket terming when talking about gender, 2 have women learn to treat men like people, 3 teach children that being a man isn't showing off, hiding emotions, & being agressive, but emotional maturity, understanding legal limitations, understanding consent, working on one's self to overcome insecurities, thinking before acting, treating women as people, & treating others with respect until they give you disrespect. And for girls to not chase after drama for entertainment, work on their insecurities, treat males as people, ignore social traditions of dating (otherwise they think it's mandatory) understanding consent, and emotionally mature. If a woman gets the ick from a guy enjoying basic hobbies, the problem is how she views things.
Overall be accepting (within moral means), treat eachother as people, understand consent, don't be afraid to join eachother hobbies & interests, and don't be an asshole.

genericname85 · Answer

so what you're doing in your question is asking how men at women can work together already pre determining that men are the problem and men are really the ones who need to change. that's really the morbid gaslighting technique that i'd call "toxic feminnity". so how can we work together to fix that?

Garud · Answer

Sometimes positive masculinity needs encouragement from positive femininity to emerge. this will bring out true equality within the hearts of the people.
using words toxic for men to demonize them first then is a dishonest way to seek any positive equality which serves both men and women.
you can be a good politcian of today's world

Astarlessnightsky · Answer

It would be a good start if those men who are screaming loudly "NOT ALL MEN" whenever someone mentions abuse, oppression and other issues women are facing are actually putting actions behind their words.

Whenever someone makes a sexist joke, just look at them, silently and calmly, and when the insecurities of the joker kick in, ask "Really?"

Christian_Cartier · Answer

I don't think masculinity is the problem and I don't think equality is the answer. Perhaps the problem is selfishness, and the answer is something more like trust or collaboration. So i guess we could start by challenging ideologies that promote selfishness and replacing them with ones that promote collaborative problem solving.

Anonymous · Answer

by getting rid of feminism and promoting traditionalism

both men and women are still highly valued under traditionalism whereas feminism doesn't practice what it preaches

but in all honesty, getting rid of "toxic masculinity" means you might as well get rid of the police force, the military, firefighters, construction workers, pro-athletes etc. where "toxic masculinity" exists

lightbulb27 · Answer

Just do it.  Not really sure what toxic masculinity is? Is that where a bunch of people play very physical sports... and the stadium is filled with men and women drinking $100 a gallon drinks?

jshm2 · Answer

They don't, as there is no such thing as "toxic masculinity". Rather, there are "toxic personalities" and they manifest in both genders.

molonski2 · Answer

They can't and should not.. It needs to be equality across the board , including so much of the fmale bs that has to be dealt with in ludicrous and unsustainable WOKE times.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

Loaded questions... I almost took the bait just so I can troll about "The Handmaid's Tale."  It's totally going to happen 😂 🤣

Danny_dan92 · Answer

The CEO of my company is a female and she makes more money in one year than I ever will in my lifetime.

So you really lose me with this toxic masculinity bs. Women have the same opportunities as men… it’s called having drive

Little_Bumblebee · Answer

Can't really work on anything if they're not willing to recognize the problem.

SolitarySolace · Answer

Seriously? Using international men's day to target men with something feminists came up with to benefit women and demonize men?

Djaay · Answer

Lmao... Toxic femininity is what gave birth to the ideological erroneous toxic masculinity which incidently doesn't actually exist. Get rid of toxic femininity and you'll never be able to find toxic masculinity.

DrPepper12 · Answer

Get rid of monogamy as it's a recent artificial construct that is completely at odds with our biological nature.

Stevepro68 · Answer

Toxic is pretty broad description. The only answer is... somehow

RavVid · Answer

We can all accept masculinity isn't toxic and question equality.

HighValue · Answer

From how that question is worded, it is obvious that the asker is part of the problem.

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

There's no such thing as toxic masculinity.

Dargil · Answer

Toxic Masculinity is  Masculinity.

Dongie · Answer

By ridding the world of filthy feminists who seek to make men's lives miserable. Without them there would be no toxicity left on the planet.

noohair · Answer

What is the difference between Masculinity and Toxic Masculinity? Some believe all masculinity is toxic... To dismantle that would require dismantling men...

seeyounexttuesday · Answer

There’s no such thing as toxic masculinity. Stop being stupid.

Ariesman81 · Answer

How about we start listening to the concerns of others and not demonizing each other for things we don't understand

Anonymous · Answer

What exactly is "toxic masculinity" is it anything like Toxic femininity?

Massageman · Answer

How can men and women work together to dismantle toxic femininity?

yvanvangoth · Answer

The only way I see this going well is both sexes respecting one another and putting aside any ego.

RedInnocent69 · Answer

Guys need to respect girls as valued colleagues, even the attractive ones they also want to boink

msc545 · Answer

Get serious. Women only value men for the money, property, and protection they can provide.

Chthou95 · Answer

No such thing as equality. I can give you many examples as to why women really don't want equality. And masculinity is a good thing.

Anonymous · Answer

There will be no positive change until toxic feminism is dismantled.

Anonymous · Answer

Go make us some sandwiches and we'll discuss it.😆

Anonymous · Answer

Stop worrying about it. If you think guys are like that, stop falling in love with them!

shortster · Answer

Realize that truly masculine traits are the antithesis of toxic traits.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

LOL.. internet life isn't what's actually going on outside the internet.

cableguy618 · Answer

Men and women should be able to work together. It’s more about respecting each others opinions and work ethic than masculinity.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know but mainly because I have no fucking idea what you're talking about.

WhiteBoyChill · Answer

Can’t you define “toxic masculinity” first tho?

Slim57 · Answer

The only problems are the toxic ones of both genders, so get rid of them

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

What is toxic masculinity?

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Posting rage bait, I see.

DerekC321 · Answer

Toxic in what way?

Stu234432 · Answer

Trust/sharing/love.

Anonymous · Answer

Kill all men and the other one will work out

Anonymous · Answer

That’s the stupidest shit I have read today

How can men and women work together to dismantle toxic masculinity and promote equality?

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How can men and women be equal if men have the power to take away women's equality?

How can men and women work together to dismantle toxic masculinity and promote equality?

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What Girls & Guys Said

How can men and women be equal if men have the power to take away women's equality?

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