Why do some people skate through life and the ones who actually work hard don't get things to go their way?

[Anonymous]

My roommate is blond, a model and beautiful. She's my best friend, don't get me wrong. Were in college together right now. I have a 3.4 GPA go to class every day, work two jobs and am always stress. She can't get out of bed before one pm, never goes to class is perfectly happy with Ds in all her classes. She cheats on her boyfriend. Everything always seems to go her way. I'm not ugly by any means I can get a guys attention at parties. I can't seem to find a good guy who cares about me. While I try so hard to be the best I can, I can never find someone who appreciates it. She has a really good guys and doesn't take advantage of it. I work so hard and feel it never gets me anywhere with people.

[BoobMan]

Because it's better to be lucky than good.

Your roommate won the genetic lottery: She was born to be a hot girl. Some people win the actual lottery: They end up with a lot a of money through good fortune (being born into it or catching a lucky break).

But, life is a game with many innings. Your friend CAN translate her hotness and any other gifts into an easy life. She could work harder at school and get a good job. OR she could use her hotness to get with a well-off guy. If she goes the second route, she could clean up her act and be a decent girlfriend/wife (i.e., stop cheating, have integrity, be nice, etc.) Of course she could also turn hotness into cold hard cash by marrying a rich guy and then taking half of everything in the divorce.

But through all of that, she'll need to save some of what she earns. Because she'll be less hot at 30 than at 20. And like an NFL running back, her value on the market will fall like a stone. Now, if she's got enough money to set her up at that stage, she's fine. But if not, she'll need to make a living off of something other than her sex appeal. And that's when having a useful degree and some job skills just might come in handy.

Anyway, you have gifts too. Just develop them and use them as best you can to make your life better.

[why-makoto-kun]

Yes, because women who take care of themselves magically expire at 30. Geez.

[martyfellow]

Wwe live in a society where blond, beautiful models don't have to work hard, and will have a lot of male attention. Too much, probably.

One thing I don't like about our feminists is that they have no problem with a woman behaving this way...





On the other hand, she will likely have self esteem issues. She knows she's skating by on her looks.

How depressed she will be when she's over 25 and starts to lose that type of attraction for most guys..while you will just be starting life at that age,and have your best time still ahead of you.

Father Time will punish this girl You don't have to. So just try to enjoy your own life, and don't feel resentful of her.

[finallyfabulous]

I totally agree with everything that you have said except the part about feminist condoning this behavior. A REAL feminist is actually totally against this because she has now made herself an object for men to enjoy while feminism is all about equal rights for all and everyone working hard to succeed

[martyfellow]

Not many feminists are real...goes without saying..Best Answer, then?

[why-makoto-kun]

THANK YOU, finally fabulous. Again, us ladies hear the trashing of the feminists and this expectation of us having double standards lmao.

[martyfellow]

7-0 the community consensus here! Clearly the best answer in spite of the Makoto troll.

[martyfellow]

Where's my best answer, already!

[why-makoto-kun]

I'm sorry you feel that way. Your choices will be much more rewarding for you later in life. She is cheating on her boyfriend, which doesn't really make her a great person (specifically a horrible girlfriend), and she's nearly failing her classes. How will she fare in the job market? Modeling careers only last for so long, but intellectual work lasts for decades.

Also, I find most American college-age guys to be kind of crappy in the dating realm. The majority seem to be immature, and will say what they want to get in your pants. Try going for an older man who has a steady job and has his priorities straight instead of the shallow frat boys (many frat boys are down for getting a girl drunk and raping her, so no thanks).

[BoobMan]

@ the comment you left me: did you read QAs story? It sounds like her roommate is a partying, cheating, not-working, lazy mess. That type of girl has a pretty good history of expiring by 30. A woman who takes care of herself is rarely one who's getting Ds in school, sleeping till 1:00 and cheating on guys like it's her job.

[why-makoto-kun]

That is speculation and possible correlation, not causation. Aging is caused by things other than bad grades, sleeping in, being promiscuous and unfaithful, etc.

[why-makoto-kun]

Plus, she is likely to be eating very little and exercising a lot, as a model. Part of the decrease in looks with age is due to getting fat.

[Anonymous]

She uses her looks and preys on the stupidity of men.

You strive hard in other areas.

Overall if she's wasting money making Ds in college I doubt she'll go far in life unless she marries well which is a good possibility because she's beautiful.

You'll go places too but you could have it easier if you used your looks and womanly charms in combination with your intelligence

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

Maybe because you're trying to hard. There's nothing wrong with trying but when you tend to over do it sometimes odds don't tend to be in people's favor. And the less you focus on others and just focus on yourself as a person more things seem to work out. This does not seem your roommate is skating through life sounds like just carelessness.

[Electric_Dreams]

Two words - Bill Gates.

There's no place for generalisation with a subject like this. Sometimes it can feel like, in your personal life, this generalisation applies, but its just an idea you get in your head and its not healthy (I admit that I have this idea in my head more than is good for me too - so yeah, I give good advice despite that I often don't take it myself lol).

[toulouse]

just because she feels happy living in lala land doesn't mean she's skating through anything

what kind of living is she going to make, staying in bed till 1, flunking school and cheating on people.

i don't see how she's skating. in 10 years she's going to be lazy. poor. and older.

[why-makoto-kun]

+1

[funkadelic5]

If by "some people" you mean "physically attractive people" it's because one of the major focuses of life as a human being is sex and aesthetic appeal, and it's been clearly shown in many scientific studies that you're more inclined to like and think more highly of attractive people in general, even if they're the same sex (or you're taken).

Being hot makes life easier. Only fools gonna deny it.

[beastman88]

the thing is when people "just get by" in life it means exactly that. shell just be getting by working some minimum wage job because she did terribly in school. so whatever don't pay attention to her, keep being awesome like you are. everything else will fall into place after all your hard work in college is done

[Prof_Don]

I think that she is very aware that she is just skating by based on her looks...ppl that do this, usually have deeply rooted emotional/psychological problems that will clock them in the back of head unexpectedly.

The cheating probably is because she is so weak when it comes to self-esteem that she can't turn down any male attention that she gets.

The odds will even out, trust me. Keep developing yourself and you'll be more "together" while she starts to unravel.

[AnomFriend]

At least when you start working for real you will know what working is, she has just been partying trough life and might not be able to make the switch which gives you an advantage over her.

Not sure if you think it makes any sense but I also have a friend just like you describe her but this is what keeps my head up. :)

[Vandal]

Because of a lot of guys are fools who truly believe that everything that glitters is gold & are willing to pay these slatterns way because their attractive.

Give it time, though. Looks fade eventually but character and hard work pays off in the long run.

[Anonymous]

she may be a god hookup/girlfriend material, but you will be a great wife material. Guys aren't serious until they get older and realize that they want something more than just a pretty face. Have some hope.

[Anonymous]

You're better than her in terms of potential for success.

Don't feel so down.

[Anonymous]

She's hiding something deeper. It's probably a coverup