Greetings fellow GAG'ers. I don't share my personal life much, but as an editor on this website for over six years now, I felt it was time to confess something I did in my personal life.
I wanted to let you know about a personal decision I recently made. I don't really feel like discussing it, but I want to put my position out there. Please be respectful. I realize this is a lengthy post, but I just have to get this off of my chest.
I'm taking the brakes off my car. This isn't a rash decision, so please listen up.
A few weeks ago I saw a car accident. Two vehicles went through an intersection at the same time. Both cars slammed on their brakes at the same time, and collided. Fortunately, no one was seriously injured.
Then it occurred to me-if they had just gone through the intersection full speed without stopping, they wouldn't have collided. Sure, there would still be a slim chance of the cars crashing, but by the drivers slamming their brakes, and causing a sudden stop with a slight ric-o-chet afterwards, this led to the crash. Don't let any mainstream media news source tell you any different.
So, I decided to do my own research and what I found was staggering: Hundreds of people every year are seriously injured by unnecessary braking. Back in December, 2009, I'll never forget this incident. I was driving in the snow and I just lightly tapped my brakes and it caused my car to COMPLETELY LOSE CONTROL. My brakes could have very easily gotten me killed. Even more astoundingly, is how often brake pads will warp and distort rotors, causing bumpy rides and squeaky wheels.
I also found out that late in the 19th Century, brakes weren't even used on vehicles! People would control their vehicle's speed with downshifting, and engine braking. Maybe it's just coincidence, but back when engine braking was used there were almost no automotive fatalities. There were NEVER brake caused car accidents in the late 1800s.
After doing some more digging, I found a nefarious plot-Mechanics: The very people who we trust to work on and care for our cars - get PAID to install and change brakes! You might THINK they care about our safety, or our cars - but they're just in it for the $149.99 brake pad installations.
So I talked to my "mechanic" about taking the brakes off my car, and I was disgusted by how poorly he treated me. Apparently, he's one of those shady CNN Mechanics. He accused me of being ignorant, when I was the one that looked up how much rotational torque brakes can put on your rotors. He didn't even know how much torque a rotor can take before being warped!!! He said(and I quote) "rotors are designed to be compressed, that it isn't actually a problem" just completely dismissing me, and my car. I told him it's my choice anyway, and there is nothing that sonofabitch could do about it.
Then he had the NERVE to say that my personal choice had consequences, and that I would affect everyone around me. Well I've had it with him, so I'm looking for a new mechanic who isn't glued to CNN. The problem is, so many mechanics are bought, and paid by the automotive industry, that ALL of them are insistent about my car having brakes. Most of them won't even look at my car for other reasons, saying that a brakeless car could cause damage to their shop and other cars. I think this is a bunch of bullshit, they just don't like those who believe in alternative braking techniques, and it's discrimination.
Now of course big government is getting involved, saying that I must have brakes. That this isn't just about me, and that I could hurt people. What happened to personal freedom? What happened to liberty? It's time to rebel against Big Auto, and the government.
Look, if your brakes worked, why do I have to have them? Either brakes work, or they don't. It's that simple.
So, all I'm saying is, do your research. Don't just listen to the media, and Big Auto. I made a personal decision for my family, we just said no to brakes. We'll be using natural remedies like Gravity, and putting our feet on the ground to stop. After all, if that was good enough for me when I was on my bike as a kid, it's good enough for me, and my family in my beautiful, freedom-loving 2015 Chevy Malibu LS.
Please keep the comments respectful!
Note: This myTake is complete sarcasm, and an attempt to mock how ridiculous the anti-vaxxers come off. Please, the sooner you're vaccinated from COVID-19, the faster we end the COVID-19 Pandemic.