The Truth of A Person That Has Never Been Loved

[lost_girl2000]

Valentine's Day is just around the corner. Everyone is getting ready for that day. Shops decorate their windows, people start wondering what to get to their partners. Valentine's Day is an opportunity to celebrate love. But what if you've never experienced love before?

I've been living on this earth for two decades. And I've never been loved. When I was little and there were romantic films on TV, I would dream of the day that someone would love me this way. If only I knew how disappointed I'd be later on. When I entered my teenage years, I felt that I could finally be able to experience what love felt like, even at this raw, immature and naive form of it that you experience when you are a teenager. I would watch all these teenage films and couldn't wait of that perfect moment when a boy would ask me out and I'd have my first kiss.

But day after day, year after year my hope of finding that love faded away. Little by little. I watched my friends being asked on dates, having their first kiss, having their first boyfriend, talking about this new experience, while I stood in a corner and wondered; what was wrong with me? Why couldn't I experience love? Why no one wanted me? I spent days and nights crying. Thinking I was not enough. Thinking I was the ugliest creature on earth. I blamed everything. My acne, my bushy hair, my good grades, my weight, which at the time was normal. I was never skinny, but I was normal. But whenever I looked myself in the mirror, I hated that reflection with all my heart, because there could be no other explanation as to why guys kept rejecting me.

Of course I had crushes. But no matter how much I tried to approach them, to talk to them, they just never loved me back. I was invisible. I spent my years in junior high, thinking that everything would change in high school. That going to high school would be that life changing experience and that everything would be different. But I was wrong. Again. High school changed nothing for me. On the contrary, it only made things worse. The only attention I ever received from guys was to make fun of me. And the only thing I wanted at that moment was for high school to end.

When I got into university, I thought everything would be different. Far from home, I felt like a new life was beginning for me. But I was wrong. Again. No love for me. No matter how much I tried to approach guys, make small talk, jokes, the minute they asked me what I was studying and I told them, they just ignored me for the rest of the night and turned their attention to the other girls in the group. I've lost count of times I've been rejected like that. I've lost count of the guys that preferred my friends over me. Like I was nothing.

Every Valentine's Day I am reminded that I've never been loved. Not the fact that I'm single on that day, but the fact that I have no memories of how it feels like to be in love. No first kiss, no holding hands, no embraces, no gifts, no dates, no love notes, nothing. I have never tasted love. And it hurts so much. The fear that this will just be the case for me, for my whole life. That'll never be noticed.

Is it so much to ask for someone to hold you hand when you feel scared? For someone to kiss your forehead and tell you that everything is going to be ok? For someone to love you for your real you, flaws and all? For someone to want you for your soul and not just your body? For someone to look at you like you are the only person in the world? For someone to bring you soup when you are sick and stay with you, just to make sure you are ok, even if that means that they might get sick too? For someone that will make you smile even if you had the worst day of your life? For someone to hug you when you have a nightmare? For someone to believe in you, even when you don't?

Is it that much to ask for someone to love you?

[HomoFuge]

That question at the end hits so close to home for me.

I've been in love with my best friend for five years now. I know everything about him. I know what makes him laugh, his deepest fears, his insecurities, the small dopey things about him. We've told each other things we've never told other people. I feel he is the one person in the world who truly understands me.

Despite all of this, he only sees me as a friend. His best friend. He has a crush on his house mate and every time he talks to me about how much he likes this girl, I feel hollow. I am tempted to give him shitty advice just so that he won't get together with this girl but I love him too much to do something so horrible. So, now I am helping him get together with this girl who will one day take my place as the person he depends upon.

Sometimes, I wish love didn't exist because when your love isn't returned, it is the most painful feeling in the world. Tennyson was completely wrong when he said 'Tis better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.'

[Robertcw]

Holy smokes. 'Nice Girls' do exist.

[AJC997]

You're a very kind and humble person

[MusicMayhem]

You know his deepest fears and insecurities because he wasn't afraid of you losing respect for him and him losing a chance of dating you. He wouldn't be telling girls he likes the same things.

[lifelearner011]

Girl, I feel you! I've been single "all my life".
I don't smell bad and I take care of my mind and physique.
I've build social skills and guys don't look at me.
If they do, the don't "approach me".
I'll tell you what i've learned. Enjoy your own sparkle and try to embrace this phase of being single, even if it its forever because it doesn't defines your value as a person. You can even work in loving yourself unconditionally and remembering what makes you be a person in the positive and kindest way.
Maybe there will be a unexpected day where this "loving" person will surprise you in the dearest way. :)

[Unit1]

That's what she thought will happen in high school and in university

[MusicMayhem]

I'm curious what social skills you've built if you're waiting for guys to approach you...

[lifelearner011]

@MusicMayhem Let your curiosity... just stay that way. :)

[derek2017]

Where are you from?

[MarkRet]

I'm sorry that you're feeling so sad. If it's any consolation, I didn't have anybody until I was about 25. I had a withdrawn, jacked-up life growing up, and had to break out of a lot of shells. In high school, I didn't even TALK to girls, because I didn't know what to say to them, they usually made fun of me, and I figured they just thought of me as a worthless piece of shit anyway. It didn't upset me too much though, because I had to straighten out my entire self, and figured love was just something that simply wouldn't happen to me.

Along the way, things just started to fall into place, and even though I wasn't really trying, I just ended up falling in love, and eventually getting married. Valentine's Day isn't such a big deal to us anyway. We're probably not even going out anywhere. Maybe life will get better for you in the future. Take care.

[Unit1]

Wow. That is something. Well what can i say? Welcome to a average guys life?
That's almost like the story of my life!
In any case i sympathize with you. I would like to change that not just for me but also for a woman like you.

To answer your question: Is it too much to ask for someone to love you?

That depends on the expectations you would have for a relationship.

To ask for love itself is not too much to ask for.
But the trick is once in a relationship certain things become too much to ask for: Passwords for computers, emails, accounts, bank card information, expensive dinners...
Just something to consider.

[AlphaGhost]

That's the reason behind your anti-relationship crusade suffering from lack of love and attention. You opt to blame the world rather than find the reason behind your failures and
##GARPES ARE SOUR
in reality even you are lying to yourself and you know it, no matter How hard you try to repent against it BUT deep down you would know. I would recommend you to not go down this road and try to find a woman cuz She may be waiting next corner for a man like you, Fighting the same battle just different demons.

[Unit1]

@AlphaGhost I'm not going to counter your irrelevant branding me as Elliot Rodger argument. I will say only this much: Me and them don't speak the same languages. Me and them are culturally different. I'm the alien here.

[Unit1]

@AlphaGhost i don't blame anybody for my own shortcomings. I accept my shortcomings.

[Guy13]

I don't know what to say except I hope things change for the better.

[CoffeeWC]

I've never loved anyone. I never really wanted love. The fact that I've never felt love doesn't bother me at all.

[Anonymous]

I feel your pain beaue even at my current age I felt the exact same way as you do. I was never loved either not in my high school years, teenag years college years even in some mature years either and your description from you have from seeing someoen who was rally in love or boyfriend or being asked etc, the same same happened to me. And I also feel the ame way when I see partners couples, bf/gf out there. I never experienced that either in my life. So if you asked me if I ever loved I mean rally loved someone in my life I have to say NO, and if you ask me if someone had really loved me back I have to say no either..

So the time had passed im 47 and at this moment I believe I no longer want to marry or even have kids, that is not part of my plans at this moment. First having kids at my age is very risky healthy speaking and also bring kids into this troubled world is not fair to them or to me. Life is expensive, too much danger out there and violence and so far mentally, emotionally or financially im not ready for kids or marriage.
Maybe if my life was different in the romantic field when I was much younger, maybe my plans could had been to form a family and get marrried. I dont think the same nowadays.

I lived my life like that for like lets say 30 years of my life and I got used to it to live completely single.

Another thing is that for my bad luck until i was this mature in age I finally met someone around my age. I met a guy just 4 years ago during a family local trip. He is the best friend of my cousin for 25 years. He is just 2 years younger than me we hit it off almost t right away that time. But the issue here with this guy is he is a modern guy. His plans are not marriage in his future, he enjoys being single and living his life as a single guy, not beign tied down to a serious relationship with a woman in order to get serious in his future and decide to get married. He may date girls and get laid as he is 45!!! he ain't no kid anymore but I doubt he will like to really settle down in his future.

For me, This guy is the very very ever first guy in my life who I really was into it, same age,, both single he was attracted to me and viceversa. With him he was the first guy who I manage to score 2 dates afer I met him 4yrs ago with him, something that when I was much younger it never happened. We both made out at the end of those 2 dates obviously we are not kids. But evenwith those 2 dates, the guy still do nto want to get into a serious relationship or to develop being a couple with me in his future.

After we met 4 years back we only had gone out on 2 dates like really dates (not even sexual intimacy we had in the dates as for me fi he wanted them it was too soon so we never got intiimate) as we are not kids, we are alrayd mature people so it was possible if that ever happen. We ran into each other besides thsoe 2 dates but more like in family events or events mingle as long as the events last but they were never actual dates between him and me..

That is the downsize with this guy who I finally met and we had mutual attraction. I dont want to marry either in my future like the guy, but that does nto mean I can see him just from time to time, not as a girlfriend as Im not that to him. But the guy only wants to see me for "you know what" even if we alrady known each other. And Im not getting any younger to go back in time and find a guy who I could rally want to form a family and marry at this moment marriage i s no longer part of my life as im nto even ready for that in many aspects

I have to take life as it is now. I mean if I continue to want to see this guy and the guy wants to contineu see me is to have fun a we are both mature adults who can't act like teenagers.

Sorry for my long post

[cryscrys1]

♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ you deserve to be happy to the moon and back beautiful soul

[Opinion Owner]

@cryscrys1 thanks very much

[luvstoned4him]

No its not wrong to ask for it. Most of us do deserve it. One of my biggest aspirations is to experience a love so fleeting , so big that its makes my heart burst (not literally) , to be able to wake up in the morning , content and wondering if this is my life. I can't say I've ever been loved nor have I. I definitely wasn't affectionate but would show my love in practical ways. Probably stems from child hood issues though as I had parents who fought (physically) and abused and neglected me. Another thing too is I have health issues and couple do affect attraction from men so there is that. there is also the worry and doubt about my age going up and finding through love seems to be less and less or more something of a fantasy. However I don't think you need a crappy , schemed day like valentine to tell u what love is. Its something we need to experience and give everyday and more importantly it starts with us. I think attaching love to things isn't a true expression of it for e. g if a guy gives you money or gifts , he doesn't necessarily love u. All in all , I think doing what u love and actually enjoying yourself is way more beneficial thank seeking out love... well what can be better than self love? I know I tend to feel melancholic if I don't achieve or create things and that makes me have a pessimistic look which affects not only my health but my confidence. I have up and down days of those. If I can constantly do things I enjoy then I feel good about myself... would it help me find love quicker? Maybe , maybe not... I will let God decide.

[lightbulb27]

You are so clear thinking, refreshing. Get those inner emotional circuits healed up and you'll have your feeling of love!
Hey Jesus Christ... make a showing over here... someone could benefit from you... seriously, that's stop 1 to me... love that cannot be taken away and is immovable... His purpose!
jewelneverbroken. com has exercises she used to heal from this stuff.

Only thing I'd add is living fully in the moment, emotionally. tapping into that sense of love.

you sound artistic... careful with the achievement piece... find joy in the creative I think very healthy.

do you know your love language... hwo you give, how you receive. sounds like it wasn't modeled for you by parents... but maybe they did and you picked it up subconsciously?

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 yes thanks, time for an awakening on my part. I really wanna find love but am not crazy about it, its just one of those BIG hopes. I am gonna start my healing, not just emotional but physical as well and before I even do that I need to find a good job. I love arts and crafts. I love colors and fun. Thats always been my escape in tough times. I guess the achievement thing comes from being ambitious and on a lower note being pushed too hard by over achieving parents.

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 I did the quiz and even before I knew my love language was acts of kindness. I feel it is only that way because my mom basically taught me that if you cared you would help: the dishes, the cleaning, cooking - those are really what she likes.

I think thats what I've been brainwashed to accept. I can live without gifts. my parents and anyone for that matter stopped giving me gifts when I was 10 so its no problem. I think I just love laying in someone's lap or walking and talking or eating by a restaurant or people just being there for me... i like simple things... encourage me and cheer me when am sick.

My mom usually tells me to die if I complain when am sick. I think am kinda retarded when it comes to love... i dont know

[lightbulb27]

we should keep talking and more as you go along, I have some context and insights maybe help keep you out of troubles. It's good to see you see these things better now and can take charge of yuor life. Its kinda like being handed a bent airplane, parents didn't know how to repair it and even mis-used it. Now you have to fly it and it doesn't fly straight. working on it and improving is dooable, it may never be perfect, frankly, non of us are, but can get it flying straight! I'm still working on my bent pieces!!! It all goes together.. spirit (call that emotion or higher), mind (thought), body.
Ilookup reparenting... watch videos, possibly hypnosis. you were programmed by your parents, there are some broken jagged pieces that can use refined.
achievement... bingo! they put a drive in you related to your value if you finish. I think that can use some putting in perspective. It's good to have drive, quality, etc.. There is unhealthy and corporate world will push you to limits. It's not worth your health... BFF went down permanent from burnout... not worth it... her endless drive, her body gave out. Art/creative is awsome outlet. I'd bet $$$$$ rock climbing will be awsome for you!

I think you need to re-parent with God/Jesus, reflect on who you want to be, go out and actually practice it and see what feels good. a lot of it won't for a while. have boundaries.

love languages are learned from parents and modeled! you have this... your intelligence sees above all this, it's just a matter of going in and re-bending that wounded little girl back into shape... the one that was supposed to be loved, told hope you feel better, to do your best but we love you anyways! That stuff. maybe that can be done over the internet here? Your parents were just... not good.

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 yes repairing... ugghhh, thats always the hard part and more so... repairing something that was ruined by someone else. Its definitely gonna be a work in progress. Of course, I can't do this without friends, God and hope. I've been told so many things and had things done to me that young girls really shouldn't have to know and I think Im pretty strong. I've been through the motions, suffered heartbreak by a parent (i didn't know that existed but they broke my heart first) and I've cried, I've been close to a psychological breakdown (or so says my doctor), I've taken the emotional and physical abuse and I've lived (surprisingly) I have even contemplated whether or not to have a kid cause I didn't wanna pass down the kind of cruelty that I endured

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 its really true what they say about those things that are buried in the subconscious and psyche you live and take with you forever.

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 redid the test for love language and I got Quality Time

Quality Time
In Quality Time, nothing says “I love you” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes you feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed activities, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful. Whether itʼs spending uninterrupted time talking with someone else or doing activities together, you deepen your connection with others through sharing time.

[lightbulb27]

Excellent! We often have several or even all, just diff degrees. I'd think that a hookup would be a death spiral for you as that close bonding thereafter may not exist.

[lightbulb27]

I didn't have kids because of wounds, exterior and self inflicted. My father was very abused as a child, married a saint of a woman, had 4 kids.. we turned out ok. she loved us, he loved us in the way he could... by gifts, not physical!.. and wounded me with words, my wound! the generation got better though than last... That's the secret sauce, a solid good hearted patient guy. you'll want to back down the volume knobs. you'll find him at church probably. work on yourself though first. he'll show up when your energy state goes up.

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 ok what do you mean by

1. knock down the volume knobs?

2. energy state goes high?

[lightbulb27]

1. volume knobs - from last conv, you talk high speed, if you convey intensity, may need to back that off.
2. higher energy state - the sadness, depression, fear, shame, self doubt, are all negative emotional energies. our souls cry out that something is wrong, but they are broken records burried inside of us that play and oppress our true inner strength. Fixup those broken records, discard and replace with positive messages and your emotional energy goes to a higher state, you have something from which to draw and give from vs need someone to fill a bottomless hole. It's all love... a love wound, or an abundance of love pouring out.

make sense?
I can send some videos if it helps, there's no panacea. absorb positive, love, build. the world is oppressive... media, a lot of music, the thinking of negative people that restricts, people telling you what you can't do, etc.. Thats not God, God built you to have tremendous capacity.

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 yes I understand you and agree. Dont know where I would meet this guy, church doesn't have much men my age. Hopefully whereever I meet him, he is the right one sent from God.

[lightbulb27]

if want to see the higher energy state in the dog kingdom... see the dog early (shame, abandomment, disconnection), later... energy/joy!
Most of all for me, it is to have something to give. I always have things in mind I can share and start a conversation and entertain.
Take the thing that is above your shoulders and remove it, it's a mess. Shift your energy down to your heart and 3ft below that. That is much smarter stuff to connect to a female. Think out of that stuff. Female MUST know that you desire her, that's what she is trying to figure out. I know you think... creepy... no... when energy is right, she responds correctly. Fix stuff above first.
Then you can learn how to conclude this positive engagement to move the relationship forward.

They will still be females and test you and challenge. You must understand female psychology so study it and how to deal with them. They are that way for a reaosn, not going to change them, but once you realize how they are, do some training on how to handle and respond, will be 10x better off. Bottom line... they are looking for emotional strength! It's where most of us fail these days. They are better off not mating than having a weak mate,... think about their view, it makes sense.

www.facebook.com/.../

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 i see. will try. thanks :)

[lightbulb27]

cool! I could guide through it if you want. the easy path is to get using his imagination (kinda hypnosis) and emotion, go to another place, and envision different. triggering belief, getting outside of his wounds is the key to unlocking it or seeing it and being free of the constraints that were imposed. hope makes sense!

[luvstoned4him]

@lightbulb27 k thanks

[FreshOutaIdeas]

Valentine's Day itself is just a corporate heap of shit anyway - I think it's tragic that we are compelled to feel like there's this one day in the year that we *must have someone*...

Life don't work like that, and it's an unnecessary social pressure put on both genders, and even those in relationships. Even people in relationships feel the need to go and buy their SO a box of chocolates or flowers or some shit... Not to be a party pooper, but that whilst that gesture is nice, I can do that anytime of the year.

People accuse people like me of not being "romantic", it's not that, it's just that I don't see the point in forcing false romance on a designated day of the year, when I can sex and romance my girl anytime, anywhere, all year long... And every year.

Society is fractured these days, people are increasingly becoming alienated from each other; things like feminism and general mental health, as well as modern society favouring *extreme* individualism is making it harder to both date and socialise generally.

So just because your alone on Valentine's Day, don't beat yourself up. Just because you haven't been loved by a partner yet, don't give up finding it. Take it from someone that doesn't struggle in meeting and having sex with women:

I'm yet to meet a chick that I can fully connect with, so I can still empathise with that sense of loneliness and alienation.

[Burgerboy21]

I apologize in advance as this is long:

I know how that feels. Now you said you're 20, right? I haven't had my first kiss until I was 21 and my first true relationship until I was 22. And that was the only time in my life I ever spent Valentine's Day with a special someone. And I can easily say it was the best Valentine's Day I ever had. I'm 25 now and have been single for over two years. I desperately want to feel what I felt that one Valentine's Day, but I know it won't happen with just anyone. Hell, just the end of last month, I rejected someone because I felt we weren't a good fit.

Anyway, I want to get to what was different between that time I finally got kissed and now/the distant past. Simply put, I was happy in that brief time period. In college, I learned that the key to my happiness was freedom from my family. That's something I had when I was away in college. I made my own very close friends, I pursued hobbies I enjoy and I even lost a lot of weight and felt great about my body. And when I had my first kiss, it was actually HER that pursued me. And my long-term relationship with the next person, we both equally pursued each other. Unfortunately I graduated, moved back in with my family, became distant from my close friends, struggled to find work and experienced a recent death in the family so I became depressed again. That ultimately led to my long-term girlfriend breaking up with me, which only added to my depression. Since then I've really been struggling in the dating scene and I know why: because I'm not happy with myself, I'm not confident and I look disgusting again.

So I guess my advice to you is to find your own happiness. Only then will others find interest in you.

[Strafe_19]

I told myself at least I have been loved two or three times. So it makes me feel like I have a reason to be confident. However you don't really know if someone has secretly loves you. So many people that you probably never guessed throughout your whole years in highschool and middle school someone walked the other way because they were that shy and you just don't have a clue! I would say though is that you know of you're a reasonable size and body shape and you're not obese there is no reason why someone wouldn't love you. I don't sit around asking myself why I have never been in a serious relationship. Why those 2 or 3 people who claimed to love me never wanted a relationship. I am content with being alone. You can't pretend to be content. You have to really understand the perks and that a relationship although you get the benefit of having helping hand in life and someone that loves you romantically, relationships are stressful and they hold you back. You really have to be available. You are required now to give them a certain amount of time out your week now. When you failed your class because you didn't study then ask yourself what you've been doing, and you realize you've spent the whole time with your mate.

Also relationships distract you so hard when you're falling in love they literally become all you think about. When your relationship isn't working out your work suffers. So ask yourself if you're in a position in life to allow certain things to suffer now and can you afford to trade that just to be with someone that might not work out.

[MadBoy]

In this world, in this day and age, yes. Yes it is that much to ask someone to love you. To ask someone to love you is asking someone to move a mountain with their bare hands.

My experience with love is very similar to yours. Middle school, no love, just made fun of or ignored. High school, same, possibly even worse. 4 years into adulthood, I've made friends with girls, but all of them don't think of me in that way. It's funny too. They say I'm cute, funny, loyal, all these positive things, and wonder out loud why I never had a girlfriend before in my life.

We who are lonely are lonely because we cannot see the others who are lonely as well. We suffer alone, even when there are others close to us who suffer the same. We cannot ask for help, otherwise we look silly. We cannot look for help, since we don't know where to go. So we sit here, crying, some even wishing for death, while still hoping with all our broken, torn hearts that we will be loved by someone.

Now if you will excuse me, typing this has made my eyes start watering and I need a tissue.

[Raven_76]

Most people are like you, including me. I’m a virgin and have never been in a relationship. Guys way less attractive than me have all done that stuff. I just think I am an unlucky person, or maybe I am cursed or something. That’s what I believe is wrong with me because everyone else gets to do things and stuff, that they take for granted, things which the universe doesn’t want me to experience. I have no idea why. Well, at least you’re feeling better than me, I have a plan to end my life tomorrow, as I’ll be alone and I’ll be able to end it the way I want to. I’m not 100% going ahead with it, but I’ve been considering it all day, and tomorrow will be the day when I get to decide. I probably won’t, because some stupid side of my brain wants to be hopeful and try to be happy, even though I get kicked back down every time I try, so, I don’t know if tomorrow will be my last day.

You’re a girl, you have it so much easier than a skinny, shy white guy who doesn’t know how to talk to girls all that well. A guy who doesn’t have a job, or a car and is a virgin.

So, you’re a girl and I doubt you’re as bad as me, nor are you on the verge of suicide. To be honest, I’d trade place with you in a heartbeat.

So basically, just be happy that you aren’t me, maybe that will get you through the day tomorrow.

@tonicandgin

[MusicMayhem]

If you're skinny go to gym
If you don't know how to talk to girls, go practice talking to them and you'll get better
If you don't have a job, go get one.
If you don't have a car, save money from a job and get one.

Dude, basically all of these problems are within your control and can be fixed... IF you are prepared to work on yourself.

[Raven_76]

@MusicMayhem the universe is just against me. I’m not allowed to succeed I’m not lucky enough.

[MusicMayhem]

@Raven_76 wouldn't you rather be in control of your life? Or is it just easier to blame the universe for your circumstances so you can victimize yourself to forgo any responsibility for your life?

[Raven_76]

@MusicMayhem trust me, I could try so hard for something and it still wouldn’t work out... it happens all the time for me.

[shimmeryns]

No its not too much to ask, everybody deserves that kind of love. You will experience it one day, sooner or later. In the meantime, focus on being the right woman for the right man to get attracted to you. Amazing moment in life happens when you least expect it, trust me.

Redirect your focus to something else, like going to the gym, do yoga or hiking? I find personal fitness goal will be beneficial for me, not only physically but also mentally. It may help you to cope with the sense of loneliness into empowerment and self accomplishment.

[Gedaria]

Life is not like the movies. I never sort people out but you get friends. I don't know what you are like as a person but reading your take it seems to me you think that someone will come to find you. You need to just enjoy life in your way. , be happy in yourself, other people cannot do this for you.
Going for a meal or going for a coffee, do things you enjoy. When out smile and say hello to people you were give the personna of a Happy go lucky girl , happy in herself, it can be infectious. And may want to have a share. That's how I get to know people !!!

[fueledbythc]

welcome to reality. it sucks and it hurts but you can either drown in your misery or use it to become stronger.

i understand your feeling because i just get girls who lust for me. girls dont want to get to know me for who i am and i understand i won't be loved in this regard anytime soon. i use that knowledge to strengthen my existing friendships and i feel more loved that way over anything else that finding a S/O will be meaningless. i have my family, friends and my dog and thats enough love for me to keep going in life.

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

No! Of course not! Everyone should know what that feels like. I know a thing or two about feeling alone. And even worse feeling that I was the reason for my lonlyness because I sucked so much. I hated myself. All I can say is that the world is big and life gives many turns. It may sound like a cliche thing to say but it is true. I am living proof of it. Don't lose hope! Keep trying and aproaching, try dating apps, ask your friends to help you, etc. You sound like a cleaver person so chances are you are already doing this. Your guy will show up. Just you wait!

[MusicMayhem]

First of all, you aren't entitled to love. No one is. You sound like a bitter nice guy, albeit to a slightly lesser extent.

You went from school to university expecting things to change. But in order for things to change, YOU need to change. If your lack of a boyfriend bothered you, doing the same things in your life will just yield the same shitty results.

So go out, meet guys, learn to flirt and be more confident and you'll get options when they see a cool, funny chick that can banter and have fun rather than be so concerned about your shortcomings.

[Guanfei]

I came here to rant because I expected to find some bullshit spat by someone who doesn't know how it feels to have never been loved.
But I've read it all, and I'm forced to admit that I relate to this. What you describe are exactly my thoughts and feeling, everything I went through.
I understand completely how you feel because you're a younger me. And, like you, Valentine's Day approaching really takes its toll on my mind.

I'd like to tell you that it will go better soon, that you should give up and love will find its way to you. But for me, it didn't, and I'm still as alone as I was at 11, 15, 18, 20... and so on.
But you know what? I'll still tell you. Don't give up and believe it will change. Hell, I still believe it when I'm a fucking lost case.
It will change. And sooner that you can imagine. It didn't change for me, but it will, for you.
But until then, you'll have my support, as another "desperate romantic".

[AlphaGhost]

You are either bookish or to much in to yourself that you make yourself very difficult to approach, I would even go as far as to say you are giving wrong vibes to guys cuz you are doing it wrong way.
There is only way to break the stereotype guys in your campus have developed about you and its is to make a NOISE
Do something idiotic against your typical behaviour like caught heavily drunk and dancing in bar your class mates attend. The remaining work will be done by guys themselves but NEVER BECOME A WHORE.
The guys will change your attitude about you and do something about your dressing cuz I am pretty sure its not up to the mark.
Flirting is a way to go not joking !

[Unit1]

An excellent way to degrade a fine woman and putting her at risk. Club girls usually aren't girlfriend material.

[AlphaGhost]

@Unit1 We are talking about breaking stereotype that people have developed about her not finding the perfect place to date. There is no perfect place to find the partner in the world and if you think otherwise, then I would love to know about it cuz its not tinder, beach or public park

[Midnight_Kiss]

Never being is better than being loved by the wrong person, just as equally as loving someone that doesn't love you back so take comfort in knowing you're in neither of those situations and remember Valentine's day isn't about being in love it's about letting someone you admire know they have an admirer.

[Pink1996]

You're still young no need to rush it.

I was 21 and the last out of all my friends to get in a relationship. Also, I'm the only one who has managed to last longer than a year in my relationship. In June, we'll celebrate our 2 year anniversary. None of my friends have lasted more than a year with their boyfriends and they've been in and out of relationships since high school.

Don't feel the need to force it, just focus on yourself in the mean time. Love will come naturally.

[FalconX86]

I started to cry while reading this, if I was near you I would take you on Valentines day as my date, but dont lose your grip, it take heart of a lion to endure that, you are strong person, and there is always justice for persons like you, maybe justice is slow but reachable. I really hope that you find love of your life, and remmber never give up because you are strong, and when storm and night ends there comes a morning with bright light, fresh air and rainbow over horizon. Stay strong.

[Jager66]

Yes that may be asking to much.

Feminism has poisoned society nearly to its very death, as a result traditional relationship expectations are incompatible with the modern world.

This is a large reason why women become less and less happy every year and have been for decades now with no end in sight.