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Well ladies, you've all no doubt read tons of books and articles on how to attract men and how to make them come after you. You've all heard gobs of advice from other women on how to do this as well. Well, I'm here to tell you today that most the advice you've heard and read in the past is only half right. And what it's lacking is just as important as what it tells. Allow me to explain further...
There are two kinds of men in the world as far as attraction is concerned. There's the kind who wants something casual and fun, which could be something as quick & easy as a one-night stand, or a casual fling that lasts a few months. And then there's the kind that want something steady, something long-term, something serious. And these two different kinds of men go about searching for women in two completely different ways, with two completely different mindsets.
In order to understand the mindsets of these two different kinds of men so that you can better learn how to attract the kind you want, we must first look at relationships in two phases. Phase 1 is the initial phase where you are both getting to know each other and playing games with each other. This phase begins when you initially meet. Numbers are exchanged, you have some fun, and you go on a few dates while you get to know each other better to ensure compatibility and allow your feelings for each other to grow. Phase 1 ends when you decide to officially become a couple and start taking things more seriously. This is when Phase 2 begins. Phase 2 is the "business end" of the relationship. It's the meat and potatoes.
Now here's the kicker: All the advice women get tell them that in order to attract men, they need to place special emphasis on Phase 1. Play hard to get so as to make him chase. Supposedly he likes it. The thrill of the hunt is what they call it. And you need to drag it on for as long as possible by constantly presenting him with challenges because once he's got you, he'll leave. Sound like the advice you women have been getting? Well, it's half right. This advice only applies to the kind of man who wants something casual. What he wants out of a relationship is the commitment-free, carefree fun and the challenge found in Phase 1, and once that's over, he'll move on to another one. But a man who's looking for something serious and long-term wants to bypass Phase 1 as quickly as possible once he's identified a woman as being compatible and move to Phase 2. Contrary to what you may think, such a man does not enjoy the game of cat-and-mouse women typically make him play during Phase 1. In fact he typically finds it stressful and full of unwanted drama. So, when a woman chooses to try to drag it on or make him work harder than he has to during Phase 1, all she's doing is pushing him away and sending him to look elsewhere for what he wants.
Basically, by putting extra emphasis on Phase 1, you're scaring off men who are looking for a serious relationship and attracting men who are looking for a more casual one. By making yourself seem drama-free and not playing games, however, and showing a man that you are willing to just let things go as they will without making him work harder than he has to, you are, in effect, pushing for Phase 2 to begin as quickly and as smoothly as possible, which is exactly what a man who is looking for something serious wants.
Playing hard to get and seeming a challenge is a great way to keep men who are looking for lighthearted fun after you, but that's about it. It scares off all the others. Is this what you want?
A big reason for all of the oversimplified and misleading information is that women are encouraged to try to change men. They are encouraged to try to attract the player or the kind who wants something casual and to then try to convert him into the other kind, the serious kind. While this is a nice little idea to entertain, it simply isn't the way the real world works.
So I hope you learned from this article what you need to know how to present yourself and act according to the type of man you are trying to attract. And that if you want something serious, you need to just go with the flow and not play games at all. Do not play hard-to-get, and do not in any way make more work for him than there absolutely has to be.
There are two kinds of men in the world as far as attraction is concerned. There's the kind who wants something casual and fun, which could be something as quick & easy as a one-night stand, or a casual fling that lasts a few months. And then there's the kind that want something steady, something long-term, something serious. And these two different kinds of men go about searching for women in two completely different ways, with two completely different mindsets.
In order to understand the mindsets of these two different kinds of men so that you can better learn how to attract the kind you want, we must first look at relationships in two phases. Phase 1 is the initial phase where you are both getting to know each other and playing games with each other. This phase begins when you initially meet. Numbers are exchanged, you have some fun, and you go on a few dates while you get to know each other better to ensure compatibility and allow your feelings for each other to grow. Phase 1 ends when you decide to officially become a couple and start taking things more seriously. This is when Phase 2 begins. Phase 2 is the "business end" of the relationship. It's the meat and potatoes.
Now here's the kicker: All the advice women get tell them that in order to attract men, they need to place special emphasis on Phase 1. Play hard to get so as to make him chase. Supposedly he likes it. The thrill of the hunt is what they call it. And you need to drag it on for as long as possible by constantly presenting him with challenges because once he's got you, he'll leave. Sound like the advice you women have been getting? Well, it's half right. This advice only applies to the kind of man who wants something casual. What he wants out of a relationship is the commitment-free, carefree fun and the challenge found in Phase 1, and once that's over, he'll move on to another one. But a man who's looking for something serious and long-term wants to bypass Phase 1 as quickly as possible once he's identified a woman as being compatible and move to Phase 2. Contrary to what you may think, such a man does not enjoy the game of cat-and-mouse women typically make him play during Phase 1. In fact he typically finds it stressful and full of unwanted drama. So, when a woman chooses to try to drag it on or make him work harder than he has to during Phase 1, all she's doing is pushing him away and sending him to look elsewhere for what he wants.
Basically, by putting extra emphasis on Phase 1, you're scaring off men who are looking for a serious relationship and attracting men who are looking for a more casual one. By making yourself seem drama-free and not playing games, however, and showing a man that you are willing to just let things go as they will without making him work harder than he has to, you are, in effect, pushing for Phase 2 to begin as quickly and as smoothly as possible, which is exactly what a man who is looking for something serious wants.
Playing hard to get and seeming a challenge is a great way to keep men who are looking for lighthearted fun after you, but that's about it. It scares off all the others. Is this what you want?
A big reason for all of the oversimplified and misleading information is that women are encouraged to try to change men. They are encouraged to try to attract the player or the kind who wants something casual and to then try to convert him into the other kind, the serious kind. While this is a nice little idea to entertain, it simply isn't the way the real world works.
So I hope you learned from this article what you need to know how to present yourself and act according to the type of man you are trying to attract. And that if you want something serious, you need to just go with the flow and not play games at all. Do not play hard-to-get, and do not in any way make more work for him than there absolutely has to be.
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