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S8tr1234

Does silence mean that we're broken up?

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S8tr1234 (Age:25 to 29)     When: More than a year ago
Views: 247     Category: Break-Up

Had a fight with my boyfriend who I haven't seen in a month or talked to in about 2 wks. It was my fault and spent a huge chunk of last week apologizing profusely only to have him hang up, block me on chat and ignore my calls and msgs.

Last week seemed like a month. Didn't sleep for days, had indigestion and actually lost a considerable amount of stress due to this stress. But now I've come to terms with reality and have put myself back on track.

I'm just wondering if I should take his silence as us being over? I last tried to communicate with him by sending an e-mail last Friday. I haven't heard back. It's obvious he's avoiding me. I'm thinking that he's going to act distant and want me to eventually get over him because of this. I have tried everything that I can and now I'm just left at a limbo.

What do you guys and gals think? Anyone experienced this before or in the same boat? Suggestions, insights.please.


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Best Answer

rebell1975
974  
rebell1975      When: More than a year ago
I'm kinda in the same boat your in, but I've moved on to the already let go stage, like I've went thru the pain, all you can do is keep on keeping on, keep busy, don't analyze. it sucks it really took a toll on my ego, and I started to feel like something was wrong with me, my self esteem was slowly being flushed down the toilet by this guy, or so I thought, until I took the control and power back that I let him have over me, once I took that back, I felt a lot better about the situation, limbo sucks, but I no longer feel like I'm in limbo, even though nothing officially ended, he just went silent on me, I tried to figure it out, analyze it, wonder where I went wrong, then one day, I had a revelation and realized this is not my problem its his and I just left it at that, he hasn't called and I don't expect him to and really at this point there is nothing to say, so I hope he doesn't. Personally I don't want to be with a person who can't communicate how he feels or what he's thinking, I'm done playing games ya know? Good Luck and try not to let it bother you, and remember your only in limbo if you think you are!
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Question Asker I totally agree with you. that's exactly what has happened to me the past week and now I'm just getting myself back together. I'm not one who usually gives up easily but I realized that there are some battles that aren't meant to be won. you win some and you lose some. it's a part of life and young as I am, this is something that I've slowly come to accept.

thanks for your comment. :) - More than a year ago

What Guys Said

JJ-Romeo
33  
JJ-Romeo      When: 8 months ago
I myself, is going through this too. I got into a fight with my girl a week ago and we haven't spoke since. No phone calls, text,nothing...and when I saw her in class the next day we said nothing to each other. I have no idea if were still together but I would be lying if I said I did not want her back.
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jtrechter1984
875  
jtrechter1984      When: More than a year ago
I myself am going through this too. Strangely enough my break up happened about a month ago but I have barely tried to get a hold of her and I haven't even tried to call her. She is the one that doesn't want to talk to me so I am being mature and letting her be. For right now I would suggest that you just take care of yourself. Put all of the pent up frustration into working out or something you always wanted to do. Let him be for right now. It sounds like he needs to grow a little and so do you. In a relationship you can argue and bicker and even have it last for a week or two however you can always take something away from the squabbles that will result in a stronger relationship. I know what you are feeling, I truly do but if he wants to be left alone then it's something that you might need to just let him be. In fact it is suggested that you leave him alone for a month w/out any contact. This will cause him to stop being annoyed by you (if he is). Now only if I could get my ex to at least talk to me (haven't even talked over the phone since the breakup).
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Question Asker I don't think I'll be spending any more wasted time pondering on the situation. I'm just concentrating on keeping myself busy. it's weird though because sometimes I feel a bit distant from people that I'm around at the time. like I'm physically there but mentally my mind wants to be somewhere else. such a strange feeling. :S - More than a year ago

Rafael151
1959  
Rafael151      When: More than a year ago
I'm a little confused. If you wonder if it's over and tried to contact him last Friday after being blocked, then what is the reality that you've come to terms with? Do you need to know that he has these feelings still and he's just acting like he doesn't? Is it that if you give him time, he'll come around again? Sorry if that's cold, but it sounds like your still holding on. You can be resting again and still be stuck in a loop (or limbo), especially if you spend your time trying to analyze things. I've done a lot of that. It's OK to want to understand what went wrong, but we can't always. If you feel like you have to wait it out a while, then that's what you have to do. Meanwhile you're marking time and that's just not moving on.
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Evilsheepempire
1847  
Evilsheepempire      When: More than a year ago
I have to say, that sadly, I've experienced this. I know how frustrated and confused you must feel most of the time. I was in the same boat that you are in.

eventually, I subconsciously ended up going through stages of sadness, depression, stress, frustration, and then just plain anger. all of the time while I was going through this, I was getting used to the fact that I would never want to be with the girl ever again. Eventually, she did return my call and we broke up the same night officially, but by that time I was so used to the fact that I didn't want her, that it was a very painless night. all of the pain had already been experienced by the communication breakdown previous to the phone call.

I hope that your situation turns out better than mine did. I wouldn't want to wish my experience on anyone, it changed me, alot, I believe that I became a much more callous person.

No one deserves this, I know what you are going through. I know how much it hurts. I hope that you get better.
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Question Asker I'm actually at the stage of giving up and starting to get over him. I've moped and cried long enough so I'm just doing things to pick myself back up again. - More than a year ago
 

What Girls Said

ladyfox
29  
ladyfox      When: 6 months ago
I am going through the same thing and I am getting ignored. It hurts when they ignore you and makes you feel so low, but as long as you have apologised there is not much else you can do. We had a fight and he blocked me on chat also. It's hard but what can you do, be strong.
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lostandconfused
1622  
lostandconfused      When: More than a year ago
Just give him some time and space without communicating to him and see how it goes. If you pursue too much you will push him away. Just give him some time to think and move on with your life. If in this time he realizes that the fight isn't worth breaking up over, then that's great! If not, then you have already started the moving on process. Guys don't like girls that cling too much and don't give them space, so if you push the issue, you won't get the result you want. You have already apologized and that's all you can do, he will have to come back to you on his own. I wish you the best of luck though.
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Question Asker Thanks so much for affirming this. hearing it from someone else and not just myself helps. hope things are going well for you too. :) - More than a year ago
Answerer Well things aren't too well for me, I did give my ex space and he came back but then he left again..so I am back to square one. I guess I neglected the space when he came back but I wish you better luck - More than a year ago
 
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