My ex is coming to collect his stuff tonight and I really want him to stay, or at least arrange a next visit?

I am so scared that this will be the last time we see each other, he's in the Navy so away a lot and he has a house miles away (450 miles). He has no reason to be "in the area" to pop in and I am really scared that this is it. I hope so much that it won't. Long story we have had a very busy year, bit of a whirlwind with lots of obstacles on the way, but we got through it, until the latest hurdle. I recently had a miscarriage after we'd split up, we didn't know I was pregnant when we split and when we were pregnant he was all for trying again but taking things slowly, until a couple of days ago and he'd changed his mind saying it wouldn't work out. I don't understand how he can change his mind like that? He said he wants to remain friends, which of course I will, somethings better than nothing, but I think it's more of a line than having any meaning. He was more than attentive the other night when he stopped in on his way back to work from a family funeral. He was lovely, we had a real giggle, yes we did talk about the baby, but that's it, I talk he listens. He has to be bullied into talking about feelings unless he's drunk. When we were together the other night it was as if he wanted to say things but couldn't and when I was having trouble getting my words out, it was if he was hoping I would say things for him, you know? He's been shat on in the past, and I know I have hurt him through my insecurities, but I am seeing someone about that and have been for 7 weeks now. I can feel a real difference. I just really want him to give it another chance. After I'd txt him when he'd left last time he said he still wanted to spend time with me and that he would keep an open mind to us getting back together after just being friends for a while. Again, I really hope he means it, but how can I be sure, without being sat by the phone all the time. I have done so much since we split, started driving, changed jobs, lost weight and things and he says it's a good thing, and yes, it was the kick up the bum I needed. BUt I feel like I need him there with me too. COuld he feel that as I have done all these things he doesn't feel worthy? he keeps saying I will meet someone better and that I deserve better, but I don't want that. I think he is TOPS! Even his mum thought we would grow old together, really didn't need to hear that in an email the other day, :0( Can someone please just give me some advice as to how I should approach things tonight? I have done very little/no contact for the last 6 weeks, with 2 visits during that time and a couple of conversations on the phone all of which he initiated. What does that mean? We are both in our late 20's and still care deeply about each other, I just need to know how to convince him it'll be different, and hopefully before my birthday next weekend. Last year was horrible as he was in Iraq and I wanted this one to be just us together...plus it's mother's day...I am dreading it :0(