Guys, do you get slightly annoyed/put off if your girlfriend eats very little just to be "on diet"?

[Anonymous]

There are guys who gets slightly annoyed by the constant "I wanna eat less to stay slim" mentality within their girlfriends. Some of my guy friends said that they feel a bit "unhappy" because they can't quite share what they enjoy (which is eating) with their girlfriends, and some mentioned that they get slightly "annoyed" because they can't cook their favorite dishes to their girlfriends as the girls either find those food oily/higher in calories, or only eats vegetables (N.B: most of my guy friends are good in cooking meat stuff.)

Not saying that it's a rational thing to do, and by no means do I conclude that all guys are like that, I just wanna know do you guys feel that way or something similar? Care to share your thoughts?

Updates

+1 y

One of the answerer asked this: Is it the amount of food(only has a few bites), or her being picky(only healthy food) that bothers you?

Updates

+1 y

Guys and girls, thanks a lot for your input. some were quite interesting. And I really appreciate all the girls' point of view on this.

[Darkfairie17]

I know guys do :P My boyfriend hates that, when a girl doesn't eat or only takes two bites in the name of 'dieting'. It annoys me too when friends I know will only have a small snack for most of the day or not eat at all and instead drink diet pop like it's something better for you then a healthy meal. I hate it because it makes me feel like a pig when I eat a normal meal like a person should. I shouldn't feel guilty about eating a normal portion, but I do because of all this 'dieting' going on.

My ex boyfriend used to be the opposite, he would have preferred that I not eat at all because I 'look as if I could go without a few meals'. I also hate that mentality because I do eat healthy (I eat lots of fruits and veggies and don't eat junk food, and I don't drink pop). I do exercise but because of a thyroid issue I have to suffer being fat no matter what I do. It's not fair to be judged like that because it's not something I can help, and I do actively take care of myself, it's just not visible to people who don't know me.

Not all guys are like that I agree. I know guys who could care less. But I wish girls would just be happy with themselves and not worry so much. It's okay to eat a normal portion, just exercise regularly and make healthy choices most often.

[Freetobe007]

Yes. It's annoying.

First of all, eating less is not going to make you thin. It's just going to make you unhealthy. Next, it's annoying to deal with any female who is consumed with insecurity and clearly focuses a good portion of her energy on feeding her insecurity. Guys don't want to have to deal with trying to make you feel better. To be honest, I'm a happy girl who just loves to have a good time and maintain a positive energy and girls who do things like this annoy me. If I was around you, I'd be so tempted to tell you "OMG Just shut up and eat!" They often become energy vampires for no necessary reason. I feel like they tend to be over dramatic and it's annoying to deal with and be around. Like if you go to a party or you're at the beach and everyone wants to have fun, you're gonna get on their nerves if you're not eating much and creating all of this negative, dramatic energy for no serious reason.

It's annoying. It looks like your fishing for attention and compliments. Guys don't like dealing with unnecessary drama

[Asker]

Woah there. I'm not the one doing it. I eat alright, portion and nutrient wise. It's just something that I've heard from my guy friends and was wondering how do the people here feel about this or have similar experiences, that's all.

[Freetobe007]

Oh OK, sorry for directing the post at you then, but I'm still firm in my belief. It is not the place of a guy to make you love yourself and take care of your body and mind. I think some guys can often feel pressure to have to "fix you" when that's not their place. It can very frustrating to deal with

[Asker]

that's cool. I understand where you are coming from. I agree with "not the place of a guy to make you love yourself and take care of your body and mind", but sometimes they can't help it if they genuinely care and have their concerns for the girl, can they? Sometimes the disagreement comes in because both parties have different opinions on what's fine and what's not. I mean like it is common to see girls having only a few bites and still doing fine, but for the guys they see this as an extreme

[Freetobe007]

I'm so glad you're shedding light on this topic! I have friends who need to find this page A.S.A.P! lol I think it's natural to want to fix something that's wrong with someone you care about, but something so deep rooted and extreme can cause stress and frustration. Especially when it's something that really doesn't need to be an issue. There are people out here with much bigger things to worry about other than something so superficial such as weight. People who don't know where...

[Freetobe007]

they're gonna stay tonight. People who are struggling with pain from sexual abuse. People who don't have the money to afford food. People who are genuinely scarred and struggling with deep issues. I think a lot of guys feel like it's a waste of time and energy to be trying to fix something so minute in the grand scheme of pain and struggle.

[Freetobe007]

I know there are some guys who have an attitude like they don't mind trying to fix a problem with their girlfriend, but if there's an issue that they're gonna have to heal...it better be legit. Not some "I'm insecure. I want to be skinny" type thing. I agree that it is extreme. If a girl really wants to be serious about losing weight, I think she should do it the healthy way. Not a way that is potentially harmful and frustrating for those around her

[Asker]

To each their own. Just a mental note, be careful when voicing your opinion about this topic to people and be careful with the choice of words. Many people can take offense with what you said and what you've assumed of them. Weight is not really a superficial issue. Personally, I think we should not over criticize thin nor fat, but really understand what's the underlying problem. Some people have their reasons to want to be thin (e.g. a past experience which greatly affected how they think etc.)

[Freetobe007]

That's true. I guess it is a little harsh :/ I just feel like sometimes people need to hear it the harsh way in order to listen. Being all nice and sugarcoating an issue can often result in little or no progress

[Asker]

fair enough. Just that sometimes we have to be aware that we might have assumed some things about others and thus give the wrong suggestions, which makes things worse. It's best that we know what's really going on before kinda giving them the medicine.

I guess that's also why sometimes people have really heated arguments here O.O

[Freetobe007]

lol yeah. I don't mean to assume, I'm just speaking to the girl who is like this. She needs this message.

[Asker]

fair enough :) I wouldn't doubt there are users here who are as you mentioned.

[chadwickc2]

I got to hand it to you, you do know quite a bit about guys! I'm impressed.

[Freetobe007]

@ chadwickc2, thanks! Just some things I've observed and notice about my many male friends

[ZenQueen]

This can be really hard, especially if your boyfriend likes to cook for you. I am active and rarley skip meals, but my boyfriend was from the south and liked cook with put cheese and butter on everything. On top of that he had fast metabolosm and would want to eat all the time. You just have to pick and choose your battles, eat enough to make him happy, but don't go overboard and blow your diet. Men and women have different bodies, guys have to understand that.

[Asker]

well said :)

[ZenQueen]

I have a question for guys... is it the amount of food(only has a few bites), or her being picky(only healthy food) that bothers you?

[ZenQueen]

thank u:]

[Asker]

both can bother the guy to a certain extent, depending how much she's into eating only a few bites or being picky. Eating healthy food is by all means fine. It's just that sometimes both parties have different opinions what's "healthy" and what's not. And eating healthy food doesn't quite mean that she's picky. if she's picky in the sense that she only eat a certain type of food just because of her likes, then that attitude may get her into trouble.

[Asker]

I mentioned "well said" because you really described one of my good friend's problem. He's a brilliant cook in meat and likes to cook meet, but at the same time it's hard for him because the girl he's with is really on diet and very adamant about being a vegetarian (she wasn't brought up as a vegetarian). not saying being vegetarian is bad, but in a way I understand how he feels about this.

[Armada]

I think it would be more annoying to have a girl just eat a few bites. I'll make her a salad if she eats the the whole thing instead of grilling a steak if it means she's only going to eat a few bites from it.

[ZenQueen]

QA- There are so many ways around eating meat. Maybe the guy was brought up with that type of food and doesn't know any other way. The girlfriend should introduce him to some veg meals(not just salads) but she should cook him some meals and show him how to make them too.

Armada- Sounds good to me! I hate wasting food.

[Belgie]

Yeah, this annoys me.

I'll try to tell you why. It's not irrational.

1) It makes no difference. Weight loss actually requires more than just starving yourself at the occasional meal.

2) It definitely doesn't count when she picks food off of my plate.

3) I don't want to hear how f***ing hungry she is, when there's perfectly good food available.

4) I've gone on record on this site on more than one occasion, that curves are sexy, and I like a girl who knows how to enjoy the finer things in life. That doesn't mean being fat or unhealthy. But it certainly means I don't want a picky salad eater. There's nothing wrong with salad, so long as you add the tasty stuff - toasted Goats cheese, for example.

[Anonymous]

This depends. I would get pissed off if I took a girl out for a nice dinner (which I pay the "penis tax"...ie...pay the entire billl) and she took a few bites out of an expensive dish. But eating in general, I don't care.

Also I get real annoyed by big girls who eat healthy in front of everybody because they are insecure. Those heavy girls are not fooling anybody (they are stuffing their faces when nobody is looking). I wouldn't be dating those girls anyway, but just saying.

However if a girl is trying to eat lean and stay in shape...FINE BY ME. I eat weird myself, I rarely eat full meals. I just snack on protein all day. So maybe I'm not the best guy to answer this.

[LittleMissGriff]

I'll have you know that often times those 'Big girls who eat healthy in front of everybody' often times eat healthy ALL THE TIME. They simply can't lose weight easily. Been there, done that.

The only reason I'm not a 'big girl' anymore is because I moved to a place with constant sunlight. Seriously, something as little as that can prevent a body from functioning properly and cause weight gain and inhibit weight loss.

[Opinion Owner]

I do believe that genetics/environment make it difficult for some women and men to lose weight...to a certain extent. Also eating habits while growing up don't help. Some people turn to food to deal with stress/depression. However somewhere, deep down a lot of these big peeps are in denial. I know it's not "politically correct" to make fun of big people. But I have a hard time buying their excuses sometimes.

[Asker]

That's understandable. If someone really tries and reaches the best they can (even if it's neither slim nor thin), that's good enough, isn't it?

[Opinion Owner]

I think some people are naturally bigger. I have been a attracted to some curvy women because they hold themselves a certain way. There is something sexual about the way they move. But I have met some BBW women who get LOUD and somehow "proud" of being big. I don't understand it, but I don't respect those type.

[Asker]

IN other words, there's no need to overhype and be highly vocal about a certain body type, whether it's thin, slim, petite, big or curvy, is that what you mean?

[Opinion Owner]

what I mean is why do women worry about how they look? Because what men think? I thought that would be logical. If you boyfriend or husband really thinks you look alright, does it really matter? Just do your best to be in shape and confident about who you are.

[Asker]

i wish I can give an additional thumbs up for your last comment, lol

[Opinion Owner]

got a picture?

[iwish46]

Yes. I also get annoyed when girls (or guys) count their calories all of the time. Just eat healthy and be active and you will be fine. Are you hungry or have you not ate anything in a while? Eat. Are you full or have you just ate? Don't eat. Also, since calories were brought up, I feel that I should mention that it annoys me when girls (or guys) main goal in exercising is to burn calories. I think exercise it to try to improve your overall heatlh and fitness level. Nothing gets me more ticked than seeing someone on a stationary bike, going 3mph, watching TV and calling that a workout. There. My rant is complete.

[iwish46]

@update: It is the amount of food that annoys me. I try to eat healthy and wouldn't mind if she did the same.

[Asker]

Yup. As I mentioned to one of the answerers, sometimes it's the disagreement or different perception that they have with regards to what's healthy that causes the conflict.

[BillyTheMountain]

If you don't want your girlfriend to gain weight, then she has to control her calorie intake, just like you ought to. Otherwise you're both going to gain a couple pounds or more per year until all of the sudden you find yourself 50 pounds overweight. (Happens to most people... Look around...)

She can't eat any where near as much as you eat because she weighs less. Check out www.Livestrong.com to see what her and your calorie intake should be for your weight.

To the extent that you are very active with exercise or sports, you can eat even more.

So back off! ;-)

Take whatever she doesn't eat home and have it for lunch the next day...

[Asker]

lol. but it makes sense :) one of my guy friends eat all the stuff that girls can't finish, lol.

[BillyTheMountain]

He'll continue doing that by habit, long after he becomes less active and he'll start gaining that 50 pounds, if he hasn't already.

[raptor]

What I prefer is a girl who is healthy. I do prefer specific body types over others, but I think we can all agree that there comes a point when a person's physical size and/ or shape is undeniably unhealthy, at least from a medical standpoint.

This might seem odd to some people, but I would be more worried than annoyed if I was with a girl who frequently ate very little to stave off weight gain/ be thin. In order to actually stay healthy a person needs to eat a good amount of food (of course not in excessive amounts, and physical exercise needs to be included). I think a previous answerer used the term "skinny fat", the colloquial term of people who fit this description.

[Sirhc001]

YES! It aggravates me to death. I cannot stand when girls refuse to eat. First off, if you wanna stay slim, it's called being active. It's 100 times healthier than just not eating. I dedicate 30 minutes a day to working out and I have an athletic shape. 30 minutes a day is all it takes and you can eat just about anything you want

[Asker]

lol, I wish I have a good body as well as you (but in female terms:P) Maybe you have a high metabolism rate :) I don't have a very good stomach and metabolism rate, so regardless how much I work out and "eat right", I can only achieve a certain weight and body type.

PS:"eating right" is a term overly used but can mean very differently for everyone :)

For girls, eating right is low calories, no fat, no sugar.

For guys, eating right is having a balanced meal without compromising much on portion.

[Quadrophonic84]

I only get annoyed when a girl bitches about wanting to go out to a restaurant and then takes two bites and leaves the rest on her plate. Thanks for throwing my money away just to test "if I care."

[Asker]

oh my, you said the same thing as my friend did

[tmlsmurfs]

this is an agreeable statement it makes me want to eat her food but then again I don't wanna look pigish. It's almost worth breaking up with the girl if all she's gunna do is throw your money away.

[WeaponZero]

As someone who is working out and trying to lose weight I can understand where you're coming from. But I also recognize there are times when you just say "screw it." For example, if you're going out someplace nice you should indulge. THAT would annoy me if she ordered a little side salad and that's it when we went out to a nice restaurant.

[Anonymous]

If a girl is already skinny then yes it's annoying. I don't have a girlfriend but I do have a few girl friends and I usually tease them if they don't eat and comment that they aren't fat. They must not care what I think lol.

It would be annoying to date a girl that doesn't eat certain things but I could look past it if she is a great person and let me eat whatever I wanted.

[Buckminsterfuller]

i just think of it this way...who would I rather go to dinner with..one of my (girl) friends who is always on a diet and making me feel guilty for enjoying my food? or one of my friends who has a healthy appetite and won't judge me for ordering dessert?

[question_girl223]

yeah..i used to be really skinny in my college years. my boyfriend used to always coax me to eat. in fact he was so obsessed with my weight that he used to keep deadlines .." by June end you have to gain 3 kg weight"... and thanks to him now I have gained almost 10 kgs (I am 53 kg now). he is all happy

[peace-love-couture]

No, guys do not care so long as:

-You do not waste their money by ordering a big meal, then only taking a few bites out of it

-Force your beliefs or opinions on them, but who likes that either way?

[Asker]

Yeah. fair point to say. there are guys who couldn't care less definitely, and on the other hand, there are guys who gets concerned about it.And yes,it can get annoying for girls when people try to force their ideas on us.Not saying that they impose their beliefs on others, but as I've mentioned to one of the answerer, I do have some guy friends who finds it a tad bit annoying for different reasons. I guess sometimes people have differing opinions on what's good for themselves and what's not.

[Anonymous]

they need to mind their business. they don't want a girl that's fat or chubby, but they want a girl who eats big portions and greasy food. they can't have it both ways. 9 times out of 10 the skinny women they want to date are going to eat small portions and stay away from oily fried foods and not eat much meat. either get over it or start dating big girls

[Asker]

I understand where you are coming from. Just remember that this mindset only applies to guys of certain country or nation. Not all guys globally are like that :)

[Anonymous]

This is funny you bring this up. My boyfriend was just complaining about me counting all my food and measuring it all out and things like that. He misses the days when I could just pig out. Thing is, I'm fat like literally obese and I need to lose weight so he's just going to have to get used to it. He's this tall guy and kind of skinny or slim. He eats like an animal and doesn't gain weight. I don't have that luxury. :/

[Asker]

I totally feel you. I understand your situation. Thus I brought this up because everyone has a point of view, and everyone have different circumstances in this situation so it's good to give a different insight to this :)

[Anonymous]

you kind of just described me. I hate being that girl, but ever since I started caring its like I can't go back to normal. its ridiculous how much more attention I get when I do watch what I eat. its like I'm encouraged to stay slim, but at the same time guys want to see me eat a lot too. I struggle to find that balance. I want that mindset I had when I was younger and didn't care, its so much easier when you don't think about it!

[Asker]

I totally feel you when you said "its so much easier when you don't think about it". not only that, it's often easier said than that. I hope you find the balance!

[Anonymous]

Guys hate watching girls go through the process of becoming attractive, as a general rule. They'll complain about shopping, salons, dieting, working out, make up, etc., and say that it makes a girl high maintenance and annoying, but at the end of the day they still enjoy the product. They just like the illusion that it happens magically.

[moloz]

You do make a point, still I hate this ignorance where "I'm too lazy to be active so I'll just eat less" mentality prevails. You want to remain thin? Exercise.

Everytime after a workout, I feel so awesome (I don't want to get thin, I am thin lol. I'm putting on weight actually, I'm in the opposite spectrum of the problem) I don't really understand why don't people make the time to do it... it takes max 30 mins/day.

[Opinion Owner]

I work out daily, dude. I've been working out for so long I get antsy if I don't get to the gym, regardless of how I feel about my weight. However, when I want to lose weight, I go on a diet. Dieting is actually a much bigger part of the weight loss process, but you're right, it does need to be combined with exercise for the best results.

[TigerRoseBear]

I'd prefer if she didn't "diet" as in eat less, but "dieting" as in eating certain foods is totally okay and is actually better than dieting at all (as long as the certain foods are actually filling and not just say cheese and salad haha).

[1stblackx]

lol, so she is trying to look better?

I'm going to get hated on for this but lol, NO IT DOESN'T ANNOY ME.

but then again, the caliber of girls I get is better than the average dude on here.

[Asker]

Why should you be hated for not being annoyed? O.o There's nothing wrong with it :)

But I don't quite follow what you meant by "the caliber of girls I get is better than the average dude on here". I'm sensing being a bit of a show off based on that sentence.

[jedisatan]

There's nothing that irks me more than when someone thinks they're fat when they CLEARLY are not. So yes, it would cause be to bash my head against the wall

[Anonymous]

I would not likely. And also, just eating little to stay thin is not healthy. Those girls more likely are not healthy, they are just skinny fat.

My ex girlfriend was just like that. yes, she was skinny, and no, she was not fit.

[Asker]

just curious to know, have you talked about it to her? If yes, how did you approach her?

[Opinion Owner]

Yes, I did try. I am a fitness freak, plus I study science, so I could explain her scientifically why her eating patterns were not healthy and actually could be harmful. I tried that way, explaining it to her rationally, and she just did not believe me. She did not take my advice and continued her ways.

[Asker]

at least you tried :) it's hard to change them because once they have their mind set on something, they go real hardcore and whatever they do make sense to them.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, that's how it seems.

[Asker]

Mind if I ask you something off topic? (since you mentioned you are a fitness freak)

I absolutely LOVE to eat since young, and I enjoy eating a lot, eventhough I don't have a good metabolism rate or digestion system. Thus, I control the amount I eat, I know the portion of each types of food (vege, meat, carbs etc.) that I'm suppose to eat, and I don't eat fatty and sugary stuff (such as mayo, butter and cheese). On top of that, I swim approx 3 times a day, occasionally change it up. I'm neither

[Asker]

thin nor fat. I'd say border slim/normal size, but not celeb slim/thin hot. Am I doing alright? and do you have any comments?

[chadwickc2]

got a picture?

[tmlsmurfs]

To answer your update question:

Me I don't care what type of food she eats as long as she eats it all. She can get a big or small plate as long as she eats it all.

this is my opinion

[Asker]

give her a hamster plate, lol

[tmlsmurfs]

you mean like the lid of a peanut butter bottle and put sunflower seeds in it for her?

[Asker]

yup :P

[nermalinda]

I like a guy who can cook, so he better like a girl who can eat ;D