Why does he hate me?

I've been wondering why my ex avoids me at all costs. It's the weirdest thing ever and makes me feel SO bad. Seriously, he avoids me like I'm the plague!

I would understand if I was a crazy stalker, who bad-mouthed him or created scenes. But I'm not. I feel like I handled our break-up well as much as it hurt, and I was even friendly towards the girl he broke up with me for when I was forced to meet her at a mutual friend's house. For the past six months, I haven't messaged him at all (only once for his birthday). I even stayed close friends with all the friends I met through him and hang out with them regularly. He doesn't really hang out with them anymore, and I have a feeling it's because of me.

He and I were really close while we were going out - didn't fight at all, had plenty of common, and there was major chemistry. He moved back home (out of state) to be with his dying dad, and we broke up because he said distance would have made things hard. Then on my birthday, he dropped the bomb on me that he was in a long distance relationship with this girl he had a fling with before he even met me (but ironically, he ended up initiating a make-out session with me that night and again two weeks after, only to tell me that he had no intention of breaking up with her in spite of the fact that he says she treats him like crap). His best friend, who I'm close with, even tells me that he never sounds happy when he talks about his girlfriend because she's "super controlling."

It just makes me sad that it comes down to this you know? I know I shouldn't care, but I've felt so empty ever since we broke up. I haven't done anything to him, and I've respected his new relationship, so why does he "hate" me this much to avoid me and places that he knows I will be? I also noticed that he signs off immediately whenever I sign onto FB chat. He doesn't even comment on my FB status messages anymore like he used to (even though he does with all his other friends and all his other exes).


Most Helpful Girl

  • i have no idea why he hates you. maybe he still likes you and doesn't want to communicate with you since he's in a new relationship (completely possible that this is false), but I can't really think of any other reasons. I'm sorry this happened :( I'm kind of in the same situation.


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What Guys Said 3

  • He is probably not happy either and just wants his space and time to get over things. let it be and let it alone. he is an x because you 2 could not work it out.

  • He's with someone else now & your old news. Don't take it personal. When you meet a guy you won't be thinking about him & will act the same as he is. He's the one who moved on 1st, that's all.

  • Because your an EX. you broke up for a reason.

    most guys unlike woman drop exes because we don't keep backups, Don't need to use someone to vent our feelings on or get attention from when there is no new person in the picture. If you wanted to do those things or he wanted to be there for you then well maybe you 2 should have stayed together?


What Girls Said 2

  • He doesn't hate you. He's avoiding you to get over you. It probably hurts him to see you and be reminded of your times today so he's doing everything he can to forget about it and run away. He's probably very confused about his feelings and probably don't even understand his own action. The best thing to do is to just move on and ignore him. To be around him isn't going to make him change his mind. He's going to continue to do things that will hurt you.

  • Hes with a girl that treats him like crap because that's how he feels. He might feel that he deserves that because he's hurting over losing someone he loves. At the end of the day you can't worry about trying to understand why he's doing what he's doing.