I've dated a lot of men in my 21 years of life. Truth be told, most of them didn't mean anything. I don't even remember the names of all the men I've slept with, and they've probably forgotten mine, as well.
Yet every once in a while someone comes along and leaves an impression. He'll drive me crazy and I won't be able to get him out of my head. I inevitably end up asking myself..is it love?
Then I met this guy...
As cliche as it is to say, he was different from all the rest. I fell for him like a ton of bricks. It was unlike anything I'd ever felt before, and loving him taught me a couple things..
Love is Certain
If you love someone, chances are you don't have to ask yourself if you do. When I realized how I felt, I literally had to choke back the words. Looking into his eyes, I was so overwhelmed with the emotion it felt like if I opened my mouth it'd all come pouring out.
Love isn't an ambiguous emotion. It makes itself clear.
Infatuation is Intense...but Fades Easily
It comes on strong. That person fills your every thought. Every thing they do is like magic. But then you wake up next to them and catch their morning breathe..and suddenly you just want to be home..far, far away from them.
When you're in love, you hardly notice the flaws. Because they don't matter. Infatuation works under the illusion of perfection, and when that's shattered, there's nothing left between you.
Love is About Trust and Faith
If you're like me, sometimes it's really hard to trust people. To believe someone when they say they love you..but that's what it's all about. It's about being able to bear a little bit of absence, and know that even if you miss the person, you're solid.
Infatuation is bipolar this way. If they don't text, it means they're over you or seeing someone else or a million and one other scenarios. When it turns into love it becomes.."maybe he's just fucking busy".
Infatuation is Fast Moving
Love at first sight? Probably not, more likely infatuation at first sight. Those intense feelings of lust and idealization that hit you like a bullet train the second you lay eyes on the person..really mean nothing at all.
Love is built over time. You fall in love with a million little things about the person that you simply can't see at 2 minutes, 2 weeks, and a lot of the time even 2 months. Put the time in. Let it grow.
Love Sex Is Better
Sure, if you're infatuated with someone you can have some hot, sweaty sex and some intense orgasms. You can even have that with a stranger. Yet nothing compares to the intimacy that comes with making love to a person who has your heart and mind in the palm of their hand. It's physically and emotionally engaging in ways that are beyond comparison.
All this is not to say that infatuation can't turn into love (It often does). Or that this applies to everyone. This is based on my personal experience. Whatever you're feeling for someone, let yourself enjoy the ride and live as it comes! If you're having fun and enjoy the persons company, don't think too much..it's worth it either way.