7 Reasons Why I Dislike Women Who Believe Guys MUST Pay On The First Date

This is a response to this MyTake here actually.

Anyway, I mean those who believe, the guy MUST do it, and if he doesn’t then it’s the #1 deal-breaker. If I learned that a woman is like that, then it would be the #1 deal-breaker for me.

And before we start, yes I’m a thrifty guy (you call it cheap), and I’m very proud of it.

(In alphabetical order)

1) Chances are she likes gentleman guys

You know she will demand from you, to pull her chair when she’s about to sit, to give her your jacket if she feels cold, to open the door for her, and all those things. Paying for the dates is one of those gentlemanish traits.

2) It's Not Only The First Date

Do you really believe it will stop only on the first date? I don’t think so. If in case you say, I will pay what I eat and you will pay what you will eat…well chances are you will receive a slap on your face.

3) It smells traditionalism

Traditionalism smells worse than a drunk’s person fart, to put it bluntly. Those are the women who prefer gentleman guys and also the guys who have lots of money. A traditional woman will be a stay-at-home mom for sure in the future. And of course she will demand from you to have sex after you get married. Not to mention, she wouldn’t like to know you, if in case you don’t want to be married and have kids. To those kind of women, the biggest success in life, is to have a family. Stay away from those women, if you respect yourself.

4) She's After Your Money

To her, guys must have a bigger wallet, than a bigger…well you know what. The other’s size doesn’t matter for her. As long, as he can reproduce of course.

5) She might comment on your dressing code

I don’t think such a woman, would ever accept you being dressed casually. You must wear suits and ties, every time of the year.

6) She wants the man to buy her everything she wants

She likes generous guys. Those guys who are nothing more than her puppet actually. Those blind fools who fell for such a woman, and buy her everything she wants, when she laughs behind his back.

7) She will comment about your friends

Do you really believe she will ever let you to have friends from lower society classes? No you must have friends from the good, high society only, and only those who are gentlemen too.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Wow, that women was so sexist (@takenchic). It actually makes me somewhat angry.

    It's 2016, just split the bill unless one person clearly has less money. And sure, you could say things like "whoever invites, pays". But that's not equal, because women still won't ask men out, so they won't end up paying anyway.

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Most Helpful Guy

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What Girls Said 28

  • Good christ, who in the world have you been dating to come up with "she will demand from you" and "you must wear.." and this one: "chances are you will receive a slap on your face"?

    Demanding, forcing, slapping... wow! You have been dating assholes. I would try talking to a girl first before the actual going-out part so you get a vibe whether or not you're going to be spending time with someone abusive.

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  • Okay, so after doing some thinking, I've came to a conclusion of how I think about this topic.

    One gender should not be obligated to pay for the other gender. One gender is not entitled TO having their meal paid for on the first date. BUT when you do decide to go the extra mile and pay for their meal, you should be doing that because you LOVE and CARE for the person, not because of bullshit excuses like "it's traditional" or "it's the gentlemanly thing to do.

    That being said, whoever invites who out should pay for the meal. That or splitting the bill is the way to go in my honest opinion.

    P. S. Take Owner, don't hate an entire gender just because some of them are bad apples.

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    • I never said I hate an entire gender.

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    • @RainbowFanGirl I know, I make the first move all the time. But most women still don't. I still get weird looks when I tell a friend "why don't *you* ask him out?".

    • I agree. Well except for the love and care part. You can't love or care for a stranger. The rest , I agree with you. It is 2016, not 1800's.

  • I don't think it's fair for guys to always have to pay. If it's a first time meeting up like this, then you should both pay for yourselves. What if someone has a horrible time, and then has to pay on top of that? It would suck.

    If you already knew each other, and are taking the lunge to ask them out, them whomever did the asking should pay. HEY LADIES: You wanted gender equality, so this applies to you! It's now acceptable to ask a guy out and take HIM on a date!!

    Once you've established that you want to go out again, or even put a label on it, take turns paying for the date, or splitting it. Cooking counts as buying dinner, and maybe the other party could do dishes, or help.

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  • I suppose I will address each one of your points separately.

    1. It's gentlemanly. Yeah, I think so, but what is wrong with having an appreciation for guys that are gentleman? A gentleman is loving & respectful of the woman he is with. There's no way being a gentleman is a bad thing. To me a person who isn't a gentleman is someone who sleeps around, someone who is mean, abusive, negative. Someone who yells and puts down their partner, never shows affection and disrespects them. Why would anyone want to be with someone like that?

    2. My boyfriend and I split dating costs all the time. Sometimes I treat him, sometimes he treats me, other times we just take care of our own costs. Paying for the first date doesn't mean pay for everything including my mortgage. Like what kind of logic is that?

    3. Traditionalism. What's wrong with that? A traditional woman to me possesses traits like kindness, warmness of heart, nurturing, loving, intelligent. A traditional woman to me is sweet and a pleasure to be around. Not vulgar and abrasive.

    4. I could care less about your money, but I'm certainly not going to be dating someone who has done absolutely nothing with your life. I don't mind helping a man build. I helped my boyfriend get his very first job at my job, and for a good while I paid for things. But I'm definitely not dating someone with no ambition in life.

    5. It's perfectly fine to dress casually. I don't expect anyone to wear a suit and tie everyday of their lives but I also don't want him not combing his hair, showering, ironing his clothes etc. I had to comment on my boyfriend's attire at one point. I try to look good for him so he could feel good about being with me, I'd expect the same thing. It shows you care and are putting in effort, at least the same efforts that I am.

    6. I want quality time with you more than anything else.

    7. If you have bad friends you have bad friends. I want what's best for you, a woman who doesn't love you would care less. by the way. Social class and quality of person are to different things. Class is irrelevant to whether or not you're a good human being.

    Also having a family is one of my greatest goals and I'm going to school for nursing. You can be traditional and still work. There's such a thing as a working housewife. I grew up in a very distant, broken and dysfunctional family. I want nothing more than to provide children with a home filled with love and care like they're deserving of.

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    • For me you are traditional and nothing more.

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    • A woman who stays at home all day, say yes to everything her husband says, and ask her husband's permission, even if she wants to go to the toilet.

      Plainly... pathetic.

    • Hmm, we have different idea of what traditional and housewife mean.

  • I already read the original take and thought it was shit.

    I read this one expecting a good comeback but this one is shit too.

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  • Perfect. I wouldn't ever be interested in dating a guy like you anyways. You seriously just sound lazy.

    I'm cheap too- but I know that some things you spurge on.
    I do like tradition and I do appreciate a gentleman.
    I never make a guy pay for me. They offer it. It has nothing to do with the amount of money in his pocket, we could go get coffee for all I care. It's the gesture. I end up offering to pay for him down the road too. when you're in a relationship, both should end up spending the same amount.
    IDC about what a guy wears
    I don't need a guy to get me whatever I want- I'll buy my own things.
    I would never comment on his friends unless I felt threatened or maybe targeted.

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    • And she send noods to 35 yr old married dudes too lmao

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    • @123cheesecake I wrote a whole MyTake about it. I wonder how many among those traits Puppylove94 follows.

      www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a31162-a-lesson-for-neo-traditional-women-this-is-what-traditional-woman

      Just curious Puppylove... how many days can you live without internet?

    • You missed my point completely.

      My argument was no one should determine how one person lives. You cannot pigeonhole people in a box that YOU determined; who the heck are you to tell people what they need to do?

      Its not a black and white thing, its more of a spectrum. Obviously some people like the colour red more than blue. But just because someone prefers the hue of bright red over the dark red or the hue that the red commonly associated as 'the textbook red' does not mean they like the colour any less, or that they do not "truly" like the colour at all.

      Look, puppy and I are 'traditional' to some degree. Everyone possess a 'traditional trait' to some degree, others just lean to it more than others.

  • You're stereotyping a woman based on your ability to put forth a kind gesture and pay? I find you making huge assumptions off of something that should be very small.

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    • It should be very small, but people (men AND women) are making a huge deal out of this for some reason.

      It's 2016, split the bill, move on.

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    • Lol women getting triggered for saying his opinion is hilarious.

    • He's not stereotyping based of his actions. He's stereotyping based on girls' expectations of what he should do.

  • Agreed with this.

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  • This is very simple. When you go out on a date... just simply tell the waiter to split the check. If she gets pissed... well you will know she is one of those girls you dont want and get up and leave. Why can't you do that?

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  • This is the most bizarre thing I've ever read. I believe a guy should pay for the first date especially if he asked her to go out, but all the other things that you claim are true about me are absolutely not.

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    • Why should the guy in particular pay?

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    • @Thisisstephypotter FYI I'm heterosexual, I don't date women.

      I split the bill with my boyfriend on the first dates. I understand why you like chivalry, but the one-sided chivalry that you're into is unfair to the guy.

    • It is not on the same boat , as the phyiscial aspects you mentioned. That is just human nature. Man wants to protect woman. Money, well everyone makes money. One way I think first dates both should pay each their own. You are getting to know each other. You are not even sure it will work out. So why pay for a maybe? But, What I do , if I ask woman out ill offer to pay.

  • Then don't date her 😂 Damn. Plus, you're shaming the way her parents brought her up. Date a "modern" girl... Like shiiieet. You make traditionally raised girls sound ignorant as fuck.

    Also all your points go either way, doesn't matter if you're a woman or man.

    It really shouldn't matter who pays on the first date. If you're going out with someone you care for and love in one way or another... In that case, money isn't a problem.

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  • lol, u call urself cheap and u even proud of it... u also so shallow! u can call urself pussy-what girl would want to date a pussy?
    girls need a MAN and real man have no problem to pay for girl on date.
    1st it act of politeness -u invited her-u pay...
    2nd -u show her u interested in her

    usually on the 1st date no one eat a lot... i have no problem to pay for my coctail and salad, but never any man i was on date with let me do it...
    my boyfriend on the 1st date even told me "dont worry about money-u can order whatever u want

    if i ever met a girl like and he asked me to pay- i ll pay no problem, but it would be the last time he sow me

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    • i agree with the you invite you pay thing but you are 27, why do you type like this?

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    • It's easy to say "you invited her so you pay", but how often have you asked a man out? Probably ZERO times. But hey, don't come crying to me when you can't find a good man.

    • @Kirah
      "But hey, don't come crying to me when you can't find a good man." loool, and who r u for me to come to u, if i may ask?
      if u can't find a good man, doesn't matter everyone can't too! thats just ur problems! and if guys never pay 4 u, its just ur jealousy, not more!
      i dont need to find a good man, i am married one and expecting a baby from him. And what do u have?

  • I would definitely offer to pay my half. I felt like expecting the guy to do so is ridiculous. If he offers to pay for me then I want to know that he's doing so because he wants to do it for me and not because he feels obligated to.

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  • Actually I believe that the guy usually pays for the first date since he's THE ONE WHO ASKED U OUT... But in general I hate when people pay for thing for me so I always pay my own way no matter the situation

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  • from what you said you believe that women who believe guys must pay on first date have high expectations, no that's not always the case. I understand we all work for our money so it might seem unfair but the man who doesn't make an issue about this, is a man who i'm willing to be with. love is love, who cares who pays- we help each other out

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  • Oh my freakin god. You are a loser. Thank god we'll NEVER date. God bless you.

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    • No. girls who expect guys to pay are losers

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    • Not you. SheSugarcoat.

  • Expecting is the bad thing-accepting, ok, cool. But expecting, nope, wrong-male or female.

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  • While I don't agree with all your reasons, I do agree it shouldn't always be guys. What's the harm in splitting the pay or trading off?

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  • LOL wut

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  • Man this is becoming a dead horse topic already. We get it.

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What Guys Said 24

  • lets put it like this, if i am cheap for not wanting to pay for a womans food then women who want me to pay for their food are cheaper than me.

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  • You're mixing up definitions of 'traditional.' There's nothing traditional about gold diggers and opportunists who play both sides of the fence.

    It's wrong to attack family orientation, which is a totally different subject from the Take you're criticizing.

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  • in dates women think
    me me me me me me me me me
    srsl clone yourself and marry her

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  • I refuse to date a woman who doesn't allow me to pay.

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  • Lmfao I mostly just pay whenever I am hanging out with anyone, Guys or chicks ima bang or whoever. For dates I usually go same restaurant, order same meals and most waitresses know me there too lol not because I wanna be gentleman or sjit lmao its usually just to rub in their face (people I hang out with) how rich I am lol

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  • I-3 are true and desirable.
    The rest is stereotyping nonsense.

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  • So you just don't think it's possible that there's a smart, independent girl out there totally capable of paying both your shares of dinner who would just like to be bought her first dinner because it's nice?
    I'm all for gender equality, I just don't like being the inside spoon while cuddling. Take of that what you will.

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  • Lol I always pay for my dates it's what a real man should do otherwise he just shouldn't go on dates period. And even into my relationships I still pay. I like to take care of my woman granted she's a good one.

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  • This might be the stupidest thing I have ever read. Grow a pair, its not that hard to pay for one date.

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    • You say it's not hard to pay for one date. Let her pay for it then

  • If the man is paying then he dictates the rules of the game as in what she eats.

    Or how about each party pays their on way, feel each other out, and see where the relationship goes. The de facto assumption/rule that men pay always is just 1 more way that women will blatantly manipulate and exploit men for their own benefit they have no attraction or feelings for. Google "rinsing" or Youtube to see what I'm talking about.

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  • What's wrong with 1 and 3? I agree with the others, but I don't see anything wrong with 1 and 3.

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  • A lot of girls keep saying that if the guy asked out the girl then he should pay. Well then, I ask you, what if the girl asked out the guy? Should she have to pay the whole thing?

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  • I gotta pay on the first date? Excuse me while i go to thw bathroom and never return

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  • Ahaha i went on a date and she paid, i didn't have money on my wallet xD.
    It was only two drinks but i felt a little bad.

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  • 3,4,5 and possibly 7 aren't necessary true.

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  • Lol, pretty accurate.

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  • Great take, besides it is just sexist of women.

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  • Do you need 7 reasons? Do you need to post about it?

    Just don't date the crazy gold digging ho's.

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  • If the girl doesn't at least offer to pay for her own stuff she ordered (which I would accept) I would think she's only there for the free food, and so that would be the last date. Im not short of a bob or two so its not that I can't pay for her meal. Its just I hate it when its expected. I only enjoy doing it if its not forced and its as a nice gesture.

    Girls who demand for the man to pay for her are either elderly women for whom it was the norm, or too immature for any man to date.

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  • Exactly and great take. Women want equality and expect us to pay... huh? WHo the f do they think they are? GET OFF YOUR PEDESTAL GIRLS AND WELCOME TO EQUALITY.

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