Do Women Just Care About a Guy's Bank Account?

Let us cut to the chase here and answer the opening question: does a guy's bank account matter to a woman? (Pause for dramatic effect).....YES! But before you all say in unison, see I told you so, I would say well doesn't a woman's bank account matter to you too? For all the guys reading this, would you, regardless of your own financial standing, want to date a girl who had no job, no prospects, no money, and she lived at home and you weren't still both in High School? Why is there this crazy delusion that a lot of guys put up, that money shouldn't matter to a woman or a man for that matter? Let's talk about it.

Gold diggers, trophy wives, thirsty chicks...they exist. They are very real. These are a set of women (emphasis on, a "set" of women) who with little tact, purposefully go after a guy with a huge bank account requiring no other filter but that he has money. But there isn't just one party involved in those gigs. If you are a fully grown intelligent adult man, let's put two and two together: girl comes out of nowhere, expects that you pay for everything, nay demands you pay for everything, and if you willingly do it no matter what...that's on you. It's like if you see your girlfriend cheating on you and you still continue to go out with her, what happens next, is on you. The sad bit about it is this blame game that often comes after those situations. Instead of blame the one girl, the bad relationship, it becomes, "all girls are that way. All girls just care about the wallet and nothing else." It clouds the vision of some of these men to the point of blindness.

How do you not know someone is after only your money? How can you have dated someone for let's say, three months, and they've never once offered to pay for anything, and you still don't know this is a person who probably expects you to foot the bill for the rest of their lives? You don't want to see. You're attracted to something else there with that person who keeps your mind tied up with them to the point where you can't see point blank obvious or alternatively you don't see it as a problem until they want to break up and you then suddenly feel like you've been screwed over.

Wealth is great. Let's stop pretending like we all don't want it. Every single person on this planet would like in their lifetimes not to have to struggle to pay for groceries, or to be able to live somewhere without a disturbing roach, rat, or dead body problem, or to know that they can save up money for each of their kids to go to college. No one sets out with a life goal to have to struggle all the time.

Without knowing a man, does a man's higher paying job compared to others in that same box look on paper more attractive to women, yes, but why wouldn't it be? It's like saying, you shouldn't be attracted to someone who is attractive.

That yes knowledge that a man's potential wealth is attractive, however, is not a sign away your life to them just because they have money---yes, unless you are of the gold digger variety. It's a yes with a huge caveat that the guy actually be someone that is going to treat them well. Money isn't going to stop the punches and blows from some Christian Grey type. Money isn't going to make a good husband or father. Money isn't going to cuddle you at night. Money, quite literally, isn't everything.

What this question ultimately boils down to is the following which is that for a guy, you don't have to be rich, but you have to be going somewhere. A man with minimal means who has no life goals, no plan of action, no school plans, nothing going on, will probably not be attractive to women. A man who sets his two feet on the ground and is willing and wanting to do better for himself even with a small bank account can be just as attractive as some surgeon somewhere. Every woman on the planet is not married to "some rich guy," which is why this whole all women only care about money thing is far from statistical truth. Let's also reality check here; I doubt there are whole lines of men who are actively seeking a woman who has no life plans, no goals, no dreams, and no money.

You want a partner whom you can walk toward a brighter future arm in arm with. Whether you are the man or woman in the relationship, few people want to have to pull someone along or support someone as if they were your child incapable of doing for themselves or paying their own way.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • There's a whole lot of truth here. MOST men who get used for their money do so knowingly, and have plenty of chances to put an end to it and choose not to. If they regret things afterwards - well, TOO BAD. When you play stupid games, you win stupid prizes.

    Having said that, there ARE a group of women (certainly not all) who aren't outright golddiggers, but who at least occasionally, and sometimes frequently, abuse mens' financial trust and take advantage of them - and they seriously don't believe they're doing anything wrong, or that they need to respect the fact that he worked hard for that money.

    My uncle has worked hard, long, dangerous jobs for decades (he currently blows up unexploded ordnance [UXO] on military firing ranges), and my aunt spends his money like water, and always has. He obviously knows she does it, but he wants to "keep her happy". That's his choice, I guess, even though I strongly disagree with it.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • i have never dated someone for his money and never will; it goes against everything i stand for.

    i came from a single-parent family with little money; my parents split up when i was 8, and my mom struggled just to put food on the table; we couldn't afford $60 pairs of jeans, or even name-brand pasta... as a little girl, i was very aware of this and therefore never developed a taste for material wealth.

    when i was in my early 20s, a relative asked me why no one in our family had ever dated a rich person or married into money. my reply was simply, "because money doesn't make someone a good person" (which, in my experience, was true: my bio father married into money and tried/failed spectacularly to win my sister and i over with expensive things).

    even though my adult life is relatively comfortable (on the tight end, but still afloat), extravagance is wasted on me. i wouldn't know what to do with that kind of money and would feel guilty for ever touching it. so, while i believe that gold-diggers do exist, real women can stand on their own two feet and seek partners who bring other things to the table...

    ... like, oh, i don't know... maybe love.

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What Guys Said 26

  • One of the most powerful college experiences I had was when our economics professor, right before finals in December (so the holidays were around the corner, everyone was in good spirits and just wanted to get tests done with and relax), asked the class:

    Guys, if you met a girl who was otherwise perfect in every single way you ever wanted... except, she had no assets, no income, no desire to work, no ambition to ever financially grow or contribute to the household... would you... not "date" her... not "be in a relationship with" her... but would you consider "marrying" her?

    About 80-90% of guys in the class raised their hand.

    Then he went on, "Ladies, same question..." if you met a man who was otherwise perfect in every single way you ever wanted... except, he had no assets, no income, no desire to work, no ambition to ever financially grow or contribute to the household... would you... not "date" him... not "be in a relationship with" him... but would you consider "marrying" him?

    Not a single girl raised her hand. Not a single one, and I went to college in NYC, and this was like a 270+ student lecture hall / auditorium class. I was waiting for like one (1) feminist or something to raise her hand. Instead, we all just looked around and laughed as the professor ended, "And with that thought, good luck on your finals and have a very warm and happy holiday season!"

    There is no excuse or rationalization or justification. Women want a man with money. There's nothing to feel ashamed of or guilty about. That's just what they want. Nobody feels guilty or ashamed for wanting vanilla ice cream instead of chocolate or strawberry. If money is vanilla, and strawberry is sex, and chocolate is personality, then why are men pointing fingers at women who prefer to enjoy more vanilla ice cream... and why are women pointing fingers at men who prefer to enjoy more strawberry ice cream? Your preferences are not "holier than thou" or "more evil / selfish than thou." They are what they are... "preferences."

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    • On a totally unrelated note, I would really be interested in an article that reads: "Women's Preferences for Men are More Responsible for the 'Wage Gap' than Your Company's Gender-Motivated Discrimination."

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    • @Botchie Yep, I think zero guys, should have not raised their hands. You were on a different topic/point like I said.

    • @SovereignessofVamps i wouldn't of raised my hand

  • "Would you, regardless of your own financial standing, want to date a girl who had no job, no prospects, no money, and she lived at home and you weren't still both in High School?"

    If everything else about her checked out, then yeah. Regardless, most women aren't satisfied with just a guy who has a job and his own place. They expect the guy to earn about 20-50% more than they do.

    I just saw a question earlier about a girl saying she didn't have a car and wanted to know if it would be a turn off. Most guys said no. The same can't be said if it was a man asking. Regardless of age, women expect the guys they date to be financially better off than they are and more self-sufficient than they are.

    Only exception would be casual sex where women only care about looks. However here you are still more selective than men are because women generally only hookup with men who are more attractive than they are. Even chubby women with meh faces can get muscular guys to hookup with them. So either way women end up getting someone who is better than them in some regard. The guy is either better looking than you are or wealthier, but you are always getting the better deal. Thats just the way it is. Women always have had more sexual value than men and they always will.

    And I am not even saying there is anything wrong with this. I honestly don't blame them for being this way. It's just annoying when women deny it or try to act like dating is just as hard for them when in reality the deck is obviously stacked in your favor.

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    • Just as I told someone else... you say a woman's bank account doesn't matter, but let's say you lose you get sick, lose your job, and your wife has no job or money of her own... all this not caring about money is pure fiction. Sure it may matter to different degrees to different people, in fact, it does, but like I said... there are very few men lining up to date women with no job, no dreams, no ambition, no goals, and no money because very very few people are actually hugely wealthy, so most couples depend on a two person paycheck regardless of who makes more money.

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    • Generalizations aren't meant to apply to everyone. There are always exceptions, but a generalization describes what GENERALLY happens.

      And I never said that women want a "super rich" guy. I said that they want a guy who makes 20-50% more than they earn. So a woman who earns 45k will generally expect a man who earns between 50k and 70k.

    • This is absolutely true. Gold star for Bandit.

      And if a guy gets sick, loses his job, gets hurt, or for whatever reason can't support her or contribute to her, she'll bail. It happens over and over again. Oh, she might not right away, but given enough time you bet your ass she will. Hell, the gals can't even stand to wait for a guy in the armed forces - he goes away on duty and she fucks around or bails on him. Also happens all the time.

      Men love idealistically. Women love opportunistically.

  • I truly do not care what a woman's financial situation is. If she truly loves me, then that is all I need. Of course, will she love me or just my home? or money? So many men get wiped out in a divorce. I am often in my overdraft because I give what little I make to my kids for Christmas, or whatever it might be. I work 60 hrs plus a week trying to make ends meet. If that isn't enough for her, fuck her.

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  • A lot of men marry women that become stay at home moms with zero income being generated. In fact I've known enough women to have straight out said, I want to be a stay at home mom

    --> by default the man has the bring home the bread and butter
    --> not all women, obviously
    --> I've also heard enough women say that even though they work, they expect their guy to spend part of their personal income on her while she keeps her pay checks

    Happens more than you think miss rainbow. More than it should > and that's the problem... that it happens more than it should

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    • Just because you say it, doesn't mean it's going to happen. Stay at home moms don't just materialize out of no where. A couple has to actually agree on this arrangement and it actually be possible financially in order to happen... and there are stay at home dads too, so it's not just a woman thing. That isn't some kind of wool being pulled over a guys eyes. How can you be upset about something you've agreed to happen?

      Secondly, who is this "miss rainbow?"

    • Who said he agrees... rather it's a certain type of conditioning for some that's hard to get away from. Such as men paying on first dates. Do you realize how many would rather not pay... who wants to sit there and continue to dish out cash for dates while she keeps her... not many... but they still do it... why? A certain expectation and a certain level of culture and conditioning

      Some women simply use the oldest trick in the book... 'Im old fashioned'

      --> sure men stay home too.. but we all know in the grand scheme of things, women will most likely depend on her husband to handle things. For when that will change, who knows. It's quite rare to see a professional women with a fat pay yearly pay check date some mechanic from across the street... but you'll catch a plethora of fancy rich men just picking up any hottie they see regardless of money

      Ignore the rainbow... mistake. Sorry

    • Oh come now. Let's not do that whole idiotic, well it's only women who make men do things bit and men have no possible way of ever using their own brains or ability to say no to things. I hear that same excuse given by men in regards to their marriages as well. That's an insult to men everywhere to suggest they are incapable of free thought or free will. One cannot be a stay at home mom or dad if there is no income to support that happening and the couple did not agree to it. I mean you're going off into a tangent like no woman ever makes more than her husband (not true) or all women depend on their husbands for everything like they are helpless. To be clear, I am well aware there are women who are that, but this continuous well "I know women and they all do it," thing is the fastest way to invalid your points.

  • Well to be honest... I made a POF when I was 20 and out of 100 messages I sent, I got 5-6 replies.

    I recently started my PhD and just put PhD into the education level... Lo and behold... 50% reply rate. I can't send more than 5-6 messages a week otherwise I'd have to schedule too many dates. Not surprisingly I found a girlfriend in a matter of weeks...

    For the longest of time I thought "oh yea, true love, I just have to wait". Yea... no.

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    • There is a documentary about this on discover called "the science of sex appeal". During one segment of the documentary they took a picture of a very handsome man, showed him to girls and told them after a bit he only made like 27,000 a year and they were all like "eh, he is okay". Then they found this wildabest of a man and told the girls he makes like 70,000 a year and they all were like "OMG, give me his number!". So year it is true

    • That doesn't seem like a very convincing argument to me but okay. It's been 5 years, the people on the site are different and your profile was probably different in other ways and you probably look different now than you did then.

  • I see why women care about money, they wanna be supported and have stability. As I told my friend who is 29, unemployed, no car, lives with mom and constantly complains about being single. "what is stopping you from knocking up a girl, changing your name and moving away? nothing!" and even then he support her their potential kid. And that is why girls want someone with money, even if the relationship fails she can get a child support check from it.
    But on the other had I wish they could see past it in some cases because I went into the military at age 20, got out at age 25 then went right into college, and I live with my parents right now... I mean it is a step back for my age but there is a reason behind it, a rather noble one unlike the guy I mentioned above. Also i'm the type of guy who will be pissed when I do finish in two years and have a decent job then all the sudden all these girls I know start pouring out the wood works for me lol. I wish more chicks were like Connor Mcgregors wife and can see a rising star in men

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  • You're preaching to the wrong crowd here.

    Most of GaG has never experienced the lifestyle of a young couple with dual graduate income. The only guys who settle for a housewife lack any ambition themselves.

    An ambitious woman who is generally good at life can raise kids as well as any stay at home mother and impart that drive for success onto them. There is a reason middle and upper class families almost always have educated mothers.

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  • Female priorities are:
    1. Money
    2. Social status
    3. Penis size
    If the guy has #1 and #2, but falls short on #3, she can always use his money to hire a personal trainer, or tennis coach, who measures up.
    I live in a city where there are a significant number of beautiful young women who are married to rich men who are old enough to be their fathers. I do not think that it is love.

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  • I think its childish to say money isn't a big deal to women but its not the only thing they want. its not like the richest woman in the world doesn't still want a man around all the time. I don't care what feminism says evolution made men predispositioned into the breadwinners I think its our responsibility to work more. but I think women need to have grounded expectations when it comes to whats reasonable for a guy to make, a guy that makes 80-100 k a year thats a great living and the guy that is a millionaire sure its great but that's a fantasy for most people. Would you rather be an attractive and healthy couple that makes ok money or a fat old couple that are tired and burned out with a fortune?

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  • Seems like the vast majority of women do.

    When it comes to dating, it is our duty (as being a man) to choose the right woman (or no woman at all), not some gold digger.
    One major benefit of having JUST ENOUGH money to support oneself is, that you can filter out the entitled gold diggers.

    But you are also right, I have zero desire to date a woman, who is a lazy, nagging "house wife", who can only complain about not having enough money or rushes into creating a family and then depend on me. So this take goes absolutely both ways.

    Still I would NEVER define a relationship by how much money anyone has.

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  • Well why elese wouldn't a women want to date a good caring loyal nice guy or consider him for relationship. Its either two options; First she's a prostitute only interested in money and status. Second option is; she is mentally ill.

    beautiful woman should reward good caring loyal nice guy with sex and relationships right off the bat, its rational logic, the right thing to do and common sense. Women don't find these aspect attractive because female sexuality is toxic or retarded... I'd rather go with retarded in my personal opinion. If Adolf Hitler was able to get a girlfriend or wife then wouldn't you think female sexuality is dangerous?

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  • If you go after the super ambitious type you will always come second to his ambition. Sure he is charismatic and attractive, but you will pay the price for it.

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  • Cunts. Cunts do, real women don't.

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  • Women fuck power (money/providers) and men fuck women. Biology 101

    That's all I need to say.

    But I agree with one thing. If my daughter had to be with some dude, i hope he had some direction, drive and yeah money for support.

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  • My friend girl doesn't care about a guy's bank account. She always says she will never ask her fiance for money because she wants to support herself.

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    • When one is in a relationship, you aren't just supporting yourself though. If you live with the person especially, it would be quite strange to say, this is mine, this is yours, I will buy my own food, you buy your own food. I totally agree, regardless of your gender, that you should on your own, be able to support at least yourself because anything could go wrong---death, loss of job, major injury, alien abduction (lol), but where your friend is going, which is a marriage, it's not that you're asking for money like an allowance, but you do share things equally or otherwise with your partner. It's a couch for both of you, lunch for both of you, the apartment/house, for both of you.

    • That's what I tried to tell her. and she was like your right. But she feels very uncomfortable asking for money from him.

  • I dunno, I never let a woman access my bank account.

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  • Yes. Last 2 women I dated were more concern with "Whats in my wallet" than whats in my heart.

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  • Well, most people don't want someone with no future prospects and a lot of debt - no surprise there.

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  • Interesting

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  • Who'd date a homeless person anyway.

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What Girls Said 15

  • I care about my own bank account. Making sure I make enough to help pay bills, food, etc. As long my boyfriend and I make enough to afford everything I am happy. Where we live we can easily afford a nice townhouse or an apartment and I'm just a home care nurse and a waitress and my boyfriend works at a pizza place and is a loader at UPS and in the summer he does small odd jobs like farming and mowing the grass.
    I was raised that as long we are not struggling with paying bills and not having a hard time having food on the table. We are considered wealthy. To me when girls say they want a man that can pay for everything, I think it's wrong because anything can happen. Both partners should be working and make enough so if anything happens either I will have to pay for everything or my boyfriend does.

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  • I think it's fucked up when people just love about money or their partner wallet. Although of course it's important but where's love? Issues like this often bring to divorce and cheating. It's different with "oh he's rich" and you are attracted but and then you know more about him and you fall in love with his soul and his wealth is not a big deal anymore, that's love.

    Let's share my story.
    So i once love a guy, i love him so damn much, (to you will say something like "oh you are just 17 you don't know love" please shut up). I know him for years and i never love someone as i love him. I was 12 back then and now i am 17. He was so cute but a little dork, I don't care about anything more than his cute smile but time flies and i grow up, he's grow up too now to be a man, he's a jock now. I don't know yet where uni he will go, or what job will he take, I don't know what will happened to him 15 years from now or else.

    But i know, i believe, he will try as best as he can to be the best person he can be. He doesn't need to be the wealthest man or have a kingdom. He doesn't have to be like David Beckham. I will always still love him like i will always do.

    That's why i try my hardest too at school and never give up on my dream so i have a bright future. So someday when we meet again, we will be a good pair. And i can take care for my own goods because i am a shopaholic, i will feel guilty if i always spent his money for my own. I can't do that.

    I will always accept him for he is, in his poor, in his wealth, before the puberty and after that.

    I think when you've in love with soul, everything doesn't really matters anymore, I didn't say money is doesn't matter, of course it is, but it's not be your number one filter when you pick someone to a date.

    The second condition:
    If i will be on dating site or something like that, of course first i will seach for a guy who have good looking, no need the hot one like Chris Hemsworth, just a good one. Then how he dressed, then his education, his job. and then his hobbies and decided he is a good person or not.

    I think guy will be like that too.
    We are human, we choose the one we think equal to us. We filter it and we know them more. And i think it's not such a bad thing. You choose one from a sea of stranger, of course you will choose the most qualified for you. You can't blame on girls on that, guy did that too.

    But it's always different if you already in love with them before you know how worth the money is.

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  • Not all women care about the size of a guy's bank account; I know I certainly don't care. I earn and have my own money so if I want something, I purchase it. Similarly, I pay my own bills with the money I earn.

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    • Are you in a relationship with someone? I firmly believe every person, man or woman should be able to at least support themselves but within a relationship it isn't all about you and what you want and you only paying for things just for you. I don't buy groceries just for me. Both my boyfriend and I buy groceries for each other. That has nothing to do with him being wealthy, because he's not, but he has a job, he is ambitious, he can pay his half of the rent.. and that is what this take is about. Women don't tend to go after men with no jobs... just because they can support themselves, and neither do men. We need to all stop pretending that money simply doesn't matter, because it does... the whole he has to be super wealthy or else, is what shouldn't matter.

  • I have worked too hard and sacrificed too much to even consider dating a bum. If you are a grown man still living with mom, with no goals and plans and isn't working hard then you aren't good enough for me.

    Why do broke guys try to convince women who are doing better than them to date down?

    Why can't they just date equally bummish women on their level?

    I'll tell u why - because they want a sugar mama.

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  • Of course SOME definitely do... No denying that.
    But the actually clever and normal women are looking for GOOD men - which in an of itself is a hard find...

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  • I date for personality and anyone who I've ever liked has always been serious with their future. I didn't say ambition driven but serious with their future, even if it's something weird like acting and you're a making ends meet while looking for gigs then why not? You don't have to have a lot of money just enough to stay alive.

    And wanting a guy to make more than me is unrealistic because the number of guys who make more money than I do... excluding those who just collect it from their parents is just too little since I'm not exactly the most attractive person... even girls play the number game sometimes.

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  • I certainly don't care about a guy's bank account. Like at all, seriously. It doesn't hold value in my relationships. As long as he gives my his love then we'll be fine. ❤

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    • So you lose your job or get sick and your boyfriend has no job and no income... who's paying for the rent if you don't care about money... like at all? This is precisely what I mean about this fairy tale that money has no meaning to anyone. I specifically said that it isn't about your guy being wealthy, but he does need to have money.

  • I can make my own money. That bank account won't love me.

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  • ah I don't care about money
    My biggest crush was a pizza deliver with a motorbike. He was super handsome and muscular and very nice and gentle at the same time. So he wasn't a rich boi but it didn't really matter

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  • I don't care because I never had a man in my life long enough to figure out if I do or don't.

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  • The women who do are not my gender

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  • I do.
    and it's all about money.

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  • i personally don't care it

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  • Women do care about money. They do! But some women-like me-who has my own job and makes enough to support myself does not want to support a guy who has no ambitions of his own or goals for the rest of my life. So yes, this guy needs to make some sort of income to my personal preference to help sustain ourselves if we ever become married- just as I am contributing financially as well. More money is attractive-but not necessary. Not every married guy is rich- a lot of women do marry for love too ya know.

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  • sounds like a dolg gidder

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