This is gonna be long, so I appreciate people having the patience to read it.
Ok, so he split up with me almost two months ago because apparently he fell out of love with me. I was really hurt and I admit that for a week or so after he left me, I wouldn't stop contacting him. I didn't beg him for another chance, just asked him repeatedly to tell me what happened. All he said was "I don't know." After a while he got annoyed (understandable) and he told me that he was cutting off all contact because it was hurting both of us. I cried for several hours, but I realised there was nothing I could do. So I sent him an email telling him that I was sorry for the way I acted but that I understood why he was doing it. Then I left him alone. There was no contact for a week so I assumed that was it and actually made some progress towards moving on, even though I still loved him. But then out of the blue, he unblocked me on msn one night and immediately asked how I was doing. I was shocked and so my answers were sort of cold. He seemed to get upset and asked why I was off with him. When I said I was confused about why he was talking to me again, he said "I realised I care too much to cut you off completely." For the next few days he continued to start conversations with me and we did flirt a bit. Then he got a girlfriend. We spoke a few times after the got together and he assured me he'd stay friends with me even if she didn't like it, but although he didn't block me, he then ignored me for a week. Then she cheated on him and left him for someone else. A few days later he started talking to me again. I asked why he'd been ignoring me and he said he'd just been busy. So again we started talking and flirting a little. Then he stopped starting conversations for a few days so we didn't talk. And then today he started again, asking how I was and why I hadn't been talking to him.
It seems like every time he stops talking, I start to forget him and then he comes back. He says he's over me but he gets quite upset if we don't talk for a while. Before and even during the rebound relationship, he was telling me he wanted to see me and that he missed 'us' and wanted a girl exactly like me. He also said I'm everything he's looking for in a girl. Please don't tell me to stop all contact with him, because even if it does help, I just can't do it and I don't want it either. I'm just wondering, if he's moved on completely, why does it bother him so much that I don't talk to him? Some people have said he's messing with my head, but it doesn't seem like it. He seems genuinely interested in how I am and what I've been up to. Could there still be some feelings there or does he feel as though he has to keep in touch? He's never stayed in touch with any of his other ex girlfriends and he ignored them if they contacted him. I've only talked to family and friends about this, so I'm looking for an outsider's opinion. Thanks a lot, sorry it's so long!
Most Helpful Girl
I'm just wondering, if he's moved on completely, why does it bother him so much that I don't talk to him? The answer lies in your posting ------------> He also said I'm everything he's looking for in a girl. I realised I care too much to cut you off completely." This means, he does not want to lose your friendship. So he gets upset when you guys don't talk.
He ignore his exes because he does not see any value meaning for friendship in staying in contact or maybe it;s just hard for him to forget them by staying in contact... many reasons for that but it does not really matter. He wants you as his friend because he feels comfortable etc. But I don't see any benefit for you by staying in contact with him right now because you need to get over him now. Well, if you choose to stay in this cycle then do it but I would not recommend it. It's going to hurt you deeper if he finds another girl (the right one) and stop talking to you completely (you will feel used etc.) Well, if you are ready to get hurt, to wait for him, etc. then do it, do whatever you want, but in the end you have to bear the consequences whatever it may be (it can be good or bad, we don't know). Think about this again and again until you're 100% sure.
Btw, I want to spare my story with you. HAHA your line is the same as my situation when you said when you start to forget him he comes back. This should not affect you because if your main goal is to get over him then whatever happens you should not respond or change your decision. You have to be firm about it. But as I said, if you don't want to forget about him and stay in this cycle then do it but it is going to feel like you are going thru hell... it's going to be really2 tough. Well, I said that because you seem to be in love with him like a lot. So, choose your decision wisely.0