What are your views on fat people? Fat women, specifically?

Well, I'm fat, as in very obese. Most people don't think I weigh as much as I do, but I wouldn't lie about it so you can trust me lol I'm 5'3/5'4 and 230 lbs.

So two things happened recently that spark my curiosity about the attitudes toward fat women on gag. My friend (who is also fat lol) showed me this forum and they were bashing fat women specifically. I thought it was pretty interesting. I already know society judges women more when it comes to looks, so I shouldn't be surprised. However, I was still kind of like "but you're fat too?" at this guy who admitted to being fat but continued bashing fat women with everyone else. The gist of it was this - fat men are "disgusting" as well but they usually have redeeming qualities in personality that fat women don't often have, like intelligence, they're funny, nice to be around, and they aren't as insecure and miserable about their weight. I already have my opinions about this but I'm curious to see what you guys have to say about that here. Be honest, do you agree or disagree with this?

And then my mom just called concerned after she saw some special on TV about how society is cruel to fat women and she kept asking me if people were mean to me, blah blah. She's just concerned and I guess doesn't want me to be treated poorly. Plus, this is a perfect way for her to transition into " and here's why you should lose weight" rans lol

What are your views on fat people? Do you see them as anyone else? Do you find them especially disgusting or inspiring some other negative emotion within yourself? DO you see a difference between fat women and fat men? Be honest.

Updates:
wtf is "rans"...ignore that typo. :)

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Hey, you're the exact same size as my girlfriend.

    To be honest, I believed some dumb stereotypes about fat people before I met her. I didn't think they were gross or anything, but I did assume things about their health that isn't necessarily true. I'm skinny but my girlfriend is healthier than I am, she takes really good care of herself but doesn't lose weight. I also used to think fat people were inherently insecure, but she proved to me that once you move past all of society's fat-shaming bullsh*t, you get your autonomous confidence back. She loves herself more than any other girl I know, haha.

    I do agree that there's a double standard when it comes to fat women vs fat men. Fat men get to be called a "teddy bear" at least, but fat women seem to be viewed in more disgust because they already have really narrow standards of attractiveness to fit into. When/if you get treated like crap because you're fat, that doesn't mean you need to lose weight, it means other people need to grow up and mind their own business.

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What Guys Said 12

  • I think people are meaner to fat women than men. the fat guys are kinda expected to be the stereotypical funny guy out of the bunch which is a good quality to have in anyone, but it doesn't work that way for women it seems like. I don't look down on fat people but am I attracted to a heavy girl? not really. I've seen a lot with pretty faces but the rest of the body just doesn't do it for me.

    i don't think they're slobs or whatever because I don't know their situation. maybe they have a health condition that causes it? usually not, but I don't know that. maybe they're just plain lazy, maybe they just don't know how to fix their eating habits after all these years (it's not an easy thing to do). either way, their choices don't affect my life personally and all I can really do is hope they're healthy enough to have a good life for themselves too.

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  • I'll be honest: I usually dislike fat people. I have a lot of fat family members and I find it disgusting. What really annoys me are the constant excuses that I hear "It's the medication I'm taking; it's a glandular problem; it's just genetics", yet I'll see them eat like sh*t and never work out. I would be friends with a fat person, but I would never ever date a fat girl.

    Yes, for the most part, fat women are treated worse than fat men. That fat guy bitching about fat women that you were talking about should shut the f*** up, he's no better.

    My sister is very fat, it angers me. I try to convince her to work out, but she makes up pathetic excuses.

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  • i got nothing against fat people so ill be friends with them

    but I will never date one because I won't be attracted

    secondly id like a girl who goes outside for hiking, jogging or just enjoys being outside for long hours without getting tired too quickly so stamina would be a concern

    lastly I wouldn't date one cause I don't want to see someone I care about in a hospital cause her obesity is causing health problems

    nope I don't see any difference between fat people but it is a double standard guys are allowed to be fat (not sure why) and women are supposed to be anorexic (again not sure why) according to our culture

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  • Sport means a lot to me, so do looks. So I can't fully understand people who don't do any sport and don't even try to. Therefore I'm not into obese women at all. But I don't bash them.

    For me it's basically the same. Guy or girl, I don't care. If I see a fat person, I immediately think about the health risks, think of them as lazy etc. If they do sport however, I respect them more than a fit guy doing it. Because it takes much more. I know some are happy, confident etc, but that's the minority, and all my friends (3 guys 2 girls) who went through an amazing transformation, were SO happy they did it.

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  • If you're very obese, such as weighing 230lbs at 5"3, you have a very high risk of dying by age 40.

    That is fact. If an individual is fine with that like chain smokers, then I frankly don't care.

    But too many people don't realize the hazard they put themselves in.

    I am fair in my criticism. I was fat once and I did something about it.

    I weighed 225lbs at 6"1 and it was all fat.

    I then dropped to 165lbs in 4 months due to rigorous tennis training.

    I then began to add muscle and have been between 190 and 200lbs with good build. I enjoy this and keep it up.

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  • I think they should eat less sugary products. It causes obesity and other issues.

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  • I really don't care if theyre obese but I don't know if I could be close friends with someone obese because I'm active and like doing sports and whatnot. That would be the only thing

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  • I'm fat and so are most of the people I know, but fat people are beutiful too!

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  • everyone I know including me would be considered obese and look better that way

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  • Put me in a room with two identical women; one is fat/obese, the other is skinny. They both have the same great personality and look the same other than one is obese, the other is skinny. Want to know which one I would pick? The obese woman. Why? Because - I've always been more attracted to heavier women my entire life, and I think a woman who complains about her weight and how she doesn't want to eat is annoying to me, given she has to enjoy herself while she's like that. In today's world - unfortunately we live in a society where 'different' is the worst crime you can commit. OP: Be confident in yourself, and don't let other people tear you down.

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  • Fat women should be around 350lbs max. Fat is great on a woman, especially a big jiggly belly.

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  • I have a few fat friends. They don't get grief for being fat, but they aren't negative personality types either.

    I don't think I could be friends with someone who was constantly complaining about being fat, while stuffing their faces full of fried chicken.

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What Girls Said 10

  • My best friend is over weight and she gets more d*** then I do lol :P

    It's really about the fat person's perspective honestly - if you walk around life letting people's criticisms and teasing bring you down, life is going to suck. My friend knows she's heftier but she still dresses well for her body, is an absolute sweet heart, and a lot of people lover her for that.

    Women can have personality too you know - as in, fat women can be funny, intelligent, and definitely nice to be around. Not just fat men. But personality is dependent on the person. Not all fat men are a pleasure, and not all fat women are lardy bubble heads.

    When I see a bigger person, I think one of two things; they are either insecure and miserable, or a little insecure but accepting of what they are. I often end up with the insecure but accepting bigger folk, who are actively trying to lose weight, but not exactly upset at their size. Being thicker as a black woman doesn't seem to be nearly as bad as being thick as a white woman. You actually get teased being too skinny as a black woman lol :P ( story of my life lol) so I haven't seen much of this fat people hostility first hand.

    Often just on television when they always show the fat person stuffing their faces and being represented as sloppy and gross - undesirable.

    They don't inspire any type of emotion, except she needs to get over herself as some bigger girls get over confident with this " fat and fabulous" idea. I don't care what size you are, arrogance isn't attractive on anyone.

    Outside of that, people are people. Just be healthy is all I"m saying - not everyone can be a size 0 ( who would want to be anyway?) but if you know you can take care of your body and prevent diseases by loosing weight, why wouldn't you?

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  • For years, I was tormented for being ugly and fat. Then, I developed an eating disorder, was too skinny and then people thought I had AIDS. I mean where and when do people draw the line with the cruelty?

    As a result, I don't pass judge on either gender. I have friends and colleagues who are overweight and I really don't care. I know why some of them are overweight, one is on medication that causes weight gain. He has been on every diet you can imagination. He works out and the weight doesn't come off. Another female just got lazy, diets and then eats badly. These people are well aware of the health risks. They know what they need to do to have a healthier lifestyle. I just don't feel like it's my place to go around and preach to people about his/her appearance. It's an individual responsibility and the person has to live with it, not me. As long as I am respected, then I shall always extend the same gesture.

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  • This really sparked my attention... I'm quite unsure how I feel about fat. I don't want to be fat. I have curves and a little extra tummy and thighs. I'm ok with that. But I like to stay in line and not go further with my weight. But on the other hand I adore to spoil things. I over feed my almost 1 year old Goldfish and he's chubby. I cook food specificly for my dog, whom is overweight. I have a boyfriend who I would buy junk food for all the time, but now he's training to serve in the army and I want nothing more then to have him finish that stuff and come back to get chubby. It's not that I want to be smaller then the people around me. It's more like I show my love by indulging people? I don't understand completely, but I guess I like chubby/fat people. Best cuddlers.

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  • I have nothing against fat people but when it comes to health I'm just saying you could do better. I just hate when they down themselves one minute and then eat a bucket of kfc the next. I don't find them nasty or icky. I treat them as I would treat everyone else.

    Regarding fat men, I find that they have it so much easier. No one really minds them being that way. Fat women don't have it as easy.

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  • i think 230 sounds big but it's really not, one of my friends is 250 and 5'5" I think and she doesn't look it at all, I think everyone carries their weight differently.

    I only notice really fat people, like the ones that can't move because they are so big, I feel sorry for them actually I know it's easy for people who don't have a problem to say why don't you just stop eating but that person could have emotional problems and food is like an addiction to them, so I try not to judge people for that

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  • I have a friend who is really overweight but that doesn't change my views on her. I mean as long as I'm in reasonable shape, I honestly don't give a damn about others.

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  • i think fat women make more sense, yes, you're overweight, but women are meant to have curves, men with bigger boobs than me is ugh.

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  • nothing, yes, no, hmm more accepting of fat men (media).. I wonder if what I said contradicts :P maybe just a bit, but really, I don't really think anything about fat people.

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  • When I see over weight or obese people I really don't think anything when I see them I see them as any other person. And yes I would have to say when I see a obese women my feeling are different from seeing an obese man. I don't judge them but if I ever come to think about it I think I am more open or less criticizing or women then men, maybe because I am a women. Yes, I do see guys at school who was named like ben890 said teddy bear. Then when they see the women they laugh and joke about them. I think some of the biggest people are the best people.

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  • My best friend is obese by the way and I worry to death about her health and the only thing that bothers me is how she complains that she eats healthy and exercises but can't lose weight. She eats terrible, I mean really terrible and does not exercise and that is why it bugs me. If she acknowledged that she has control and just isn't using it then it wouldn't bug me. I would still worry about her health.

    I was also hanging out with two fat ladies the other night and they are so much fun, great personalities, great sense of humor, I would hang out with them again any day.

    My views on fat guys are quite low for the reason you mentioned, where do these fat guys get off insulting fat women. That alone is why I hold them in such low regard, that alone shows they do NOT have any redeeming qualities. This is just for the fat guys with double standards.

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