How does a hot and heavy relationship go cold so fast and how do I fix it?
I met this amazing man online 7 weeks ago. We clicked immediately, it was like we knew each other forever, he said the same. He introduced me to his children after only 3 weeks (I wanted to wait he didn't)
Last Sunday went to a party at his friends, afterward asked me to meet his parents and sister on Thanksgiving after I got home from my mom's and I said yes. The next night after we made love I told him I was crazy about him, and asked where he thought the relationship was going (I know to soon) he said nothing.
He never gave me a time to meet his family. Thanksgiving was here and gone and he hasn't brought up him not calling me to arrange a time to meet his family.
I am so confused, he told me I was the "complete package" and now he is backing off. I am 45 - he is 42 I told him from the beginning I am to old to play games, just want to be in a serious relationship again. He said he wanted the same.
His texts have gone from "Hey Babe thinking of you" - quick cold answers. Hasn't asked me out in over a week. I asked him to my house on Friday for dinner but he said "no sex" because he was sore from Monday? What? Every time we have been together he was very happy. He did come but he was pretty cold and distant, not at all the touchy feely guy that he has been.
Clearly he is pulling away how do I get him to forget what I asked and get this relationship back on track? Unless I am freaking out for nothing, but the Thanksgiving thing doesn't make me think that I am (plus him not asking me out also has me worried)
Women keep telling me not to do anything not to text, call nothing. I know women that have used this way of thinking and it has NEVER ONCE worked for them, all it does is makes the relationship end without any answers, seems to be an easy way out for the guy.
Really need some advice and fast!
What's Your Opinion?
Most Helpful Opinion
Yes - I agree with you. When a woman stops texting or emailing for a few days, I shut down, forget and move on. Never to talk with them again. I like attention. so just send a nice little text saying how are you, is everything ok.. Don't over do it. and don't send any more.
But to your question. YES after you stated you were crazy for him, everything stopped. Well its not your fault . he started it with inviting you to meet his family and telling you were the complete package. But it sounds like he got cold feet.
So what to do. Follow above, then stop. No contact in 3 days, NEVER I MEAN Never talk with him again. Apparently you don't mean that much to him that he totally ignores you.
Walk with your pride. And forget the age thing. It never meant anything to me, and some guy would be lucky to have someone like you that does not like games. The Man is a fool.
What Guys Said 1
What Girls Said 1
Sounds like whatever happened before or after the sex really freaked him out. Although, I find it strange he wanted to cut the sex altogether. If you're not about playing games, why not just ask him straight up? Say that you noticed a 180 after you slept together, and if that's all he was interested in to just let you know, or at least tell you what freaked him out.
If he doesn't give you answers or change his behavior, your friends are right, stop contacting him. Not because you're trying to play games and force him to change, but because it is no longer worth it at this point. You deserve a guy that gets closer to you after sex, not pulls back with no answers. How can he respect you if you're clearly showing no respect for yourself chasing after this emotionally unavailable man? He will make judgments about you based on how you put up with this treatment.