My boyfriend is always so damn grumpy...

We've been together for over a year now. A good 70% of the time I talk to him, he's upset about something or something hurts or just something negative. It sort of brings me down. But when he's good and not Mr Grumpy Pants, he's great...I mean has me on clouds. I know that relationships are supposed to be real and I cannot expect everything to be rosey all the time but dag...I'm an upbeat person and it affects me. He hasn't been in a relationship a real relationship in quite some time. I am starting to fall for him but I fear that this could be a real deal breaker and I am having a hard time figuring out how best to bring it up w/o seeming insensitive. Its like, you had that rant we really have to talk about it again today. And its even starting to take away from how much he bothers to ask how I am doing. I do not want to push him away or have him to shut down on me from sharing. But is it too much to ask, "hey lets not bring up every little ruffle"?

Honestly I am an upbeat gal moreso than not. I bring a lot of positive energy to our relationship. He has some solid character traits, ones of a great partner that I have not had in other boyfriends. He makes me want to be a better person. And he is still young enough (27) and has a drive that I believe that he knows the difference between a dream and a goal. When I say negative, he focuses more on the negative aspects of his day vs not. But when we talk he does eventually come out of it.
Reading you guys responses is making me think...would I prefer the flip side of he not talking about the negative at all and feeling like he has to bottle it up?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Someone who is always grumpy is unhappy in his life...

    Now if it bothers you that he is always grumpy, tell him how bad he makes you feel in these cases and tell him how much you love when he's just normal: remind him the few times it happened. And explain to him how it will make everything easier for you if he could durn down being so grumpy.

    He should understand.

    • Report

      angel you make a great point, he is aware that he is unhappy and what he is unhappy about. and he wants to do better at addressing those things...we just both realize that its not going to happen overnight. I really like the idea of sharing how much better I feel when he is 'normal' ; it would be so much easier.