1. This is humorously written and posted. No serious stuff here.
2. Written in the mind set of 'GirlsAskGuys', but anything that applies to women may also apply to men.
The Archetypes of Girls on GAG (part 1):
While she may not be *every* girl, she could be every other question in GirlsAskGuys. Her question is always the same. "Is he interested in me?"
She fits in VERY well.
Hello, Every Girl! Welcome to GirlsAskGuys!!
She's so shy. She has a crush. "How can I get him to ask me?" she says. The thought of making a move is fearful and daunting. Where to even begin? What will happen to me if he says no?
Hello, Shy Girl! Heh, wait, come back!!!
Always asks some question like, "He hasn't texted me in over 3 minutes! Help! Is he still interested?! How long must I wait? Is 10 minutes too long?"
Hello Needy Girl, please take a deep breath and relax.
No, its not Hatsune Miku - but Digital Girl is queen of the facebook stalkers and a text messaging
fiend. She occassionally does Skype calls. Whether it is behind her computer or behind her phone, her space is cyberspace. She always writes awkward questions about men that do not seem to line up well, until you figure out she didn't actually meet with them yet. She sometimes thinks she is in a relationship with an e-male, especially if she has never experienced a real relationship before.
A case of Digital Girl NEVER results in Old Maid Girl (this is a phenomena worth a nobel prize to whoever figures it out). Also, Digital Girl eventually goes outside. She is also not Needy Girl. She seems to be Shy Girl as often as any other girl; Digital Girl does not preclude Shy Girl. There is typically hope for her.
Hello Digital Girl, thanks for posting! Now it is time go outside.
Old Maid Girl
If the question is "Why am I still single?" you can stop reading the details now and move to another question. Alas, you have had the misfortune of encountering an Old Maid Girl. I have answered this with dozens of different approaches: agreement, disagreement, luke warm, challenging, passive,
analytical, caring, heartless, friendly, unfriendly, and even random - it all matters not. It does not matter the girl, or her situation details, or her personal details, or anything at all it seems. All these girls are different, but one thing remains the same:
She'll award MH to the first person who says "Its not you, keep looking!" or, "You're so beautiful all
men are intimidated, despite thousands of years of male breeding potential!"
A few times I gave her friend requests (now 'follow' with new site) to message her, talk with her a little, and then based on the experience maybe provide her some positive feedback what she is doing wrong.
Nope! She won't accept, even though every other girl has. I think we're onto something with that one.
Hello Old Maid Girl, I'd say something but my voice is drowned out by the sound of how awesome you are!
This girl will ask how she can find the "one." Who?? I don't know of anybody named One. Exactly why is the universe somehow obligated to churn out all souls in loving diametrically fitting pairs? Even if there was proof for that, who is to say your soul mate wasn't already born 1,000 years ago?
In my guestimation, you got about 1 in every 100,000* people who are an 'optimal match' or as optimal as its going to be related to your ability to sustain a relationship. Heck, Fate Girl, if it truly pleases you then you may call this 1 in 100k match 'the one.' The problem is Fate isn't batting for you; you are batting for you. Keep your eye on the ball!
Otherwise, Fate Girl, you will be a lonely one. It really is in your hands.
The good news is Fate Girl can never double as Old Maid Girl or Needy Girl. Sometimes she can be Digital Girl.
Hello Fate Girl, I found Mr. Right but he told me he was with someone else. Better luck next time!
* = For some temperaments, this number is even lower.
No Faith in Marriage Girl
She thinks marriage is awful. She thinks marriage will never last. She wonders why people even get married. She won't get married. She won't get split up like mommy and daddy because she's not doing it to begin with. She knows she is cynical but she doesn't care.
But there is one thing we all have in common with her! We would all prefer not to see her get married.
Hello No Faith in Marriage Girl, you must find your own path!
Also very common is her twin, Ranting Boy. Except gender stereotypes make him look lame(r) when he does it.
Ranting Girl asks a question, like, "Why the f*** would someone do that?" - except she's not really that curious, about as curious as there is a situation-changing answer as to why they would.
As it turns out, she is just ranting. Sometimes her rants are interesting to read, like piecing together a story with telltale clues, which take the form of generalizations (i.e., "Why do all men cheat?" --> Did someone just cheat on you?). They are obviously applying to a highly specific set of circumstances that she is no doubt currently going through.
Hello Ranting Girl, you tell'em!
Idealist Feminist Girl
She is very educated on the topic. She had lots of teachers. She read lots of books and websites. She
did a lot of learnin'. She is also probably 18-24 and she definitely knows better than you. She thinks she will impress the world with her 'infallible' logic. She is always right. She also knows what your argument is, even if you never stated one or were just asking. All of course in the context of her own fiction.
Hello Idealist Feminist Girl, GAG does not stand for Girls Against Guys.
Twice Pretty Girl
Someone told her she was beautiful, or sexy, or what have you. She will then ask a question saying,
"Someone said I was beautiful and/or sexy. What does it mean?" The obvious answer is, of course, that someone thought she was beautiful and/or sexy. Or just leading her on, heh heh. Except in the answer box it will read, "It means you are pretty/sexy", so she gets to see the compliment TWICE. Also to let everyone on G@G know she is in the hotness club.
Too bad media showers us guys with so many attractive girls that it is utterly drab to know some girl on GirlsAskGuys is pretty. Yeah, go take a number behind all the other millions of supermodels.
Poor thing, how will she get her ego fed? Well, I suppose I can help out:
Hello Twice Pretty Girl, you're so pretty!
She will ask if it is ok if she does something. Is it right or wrong if I say this or that? Is it ok if
someone does this thing, or that other thing? Her values are adrift. She hasn't defined her moral compass yet.
And she needs YOU to tell her what is right. Or wrong. Let's hope she doesn't fall for anything.
Hello Drifting girl, stand for something!
Whelp, hope you all had a good laugh, and like I said, whatever applies to girls here also applies to men! No specific time planned for the next installment, but it might happen someday.
I guess I'll go back to answering all your questions now, hahaha.