Today I will talk about the art of texting, what to do (or not do) in certain situations and how you should behave when you're texting someone.
I'm quite an experienced texter so I can confidently say I have met many different kinds of texters. They have taught me a lot through their habits and I hope that what I share with you today will be useful to you in the future.
Here are some of the biggest DON'TS when it comes to texting:
1. Read a message without responding
If the conversation has naturally ended and you don't have anything else to say, then you obviously shouldn't feel forced to keep texting them. Otherwise you would be stuck in a never-ending loop of texting them constantly and that can't be good. What I'm talking about is ignoring a person who is asking you a question, offering you something or trying to start a conversation. It could be anything that actually expects a response from you. It could be a yes/no thing, or it could be a more elaborate thing. Bottom line is, that person expects a response from you, and if you read their message without responding, that person is going to feel ignored and left out.
Whether you meant to do it or not doesn't matter, it's a bad habit and you shouldn't do it. It's the equivalent of having someone walk up to you, ask you something, and you staring blankly into their eyes without responding. It's rude and hurtful. If you're too busy to actually respond to the text, then simply don't open it and read it. Once you open it, they will get a notification that you've read it, and that's when they'll start to feel ignored. If you're so busy, then what are you even doing on your phone in the first place? If you have enough time to read it, you have enough time to respond. If you're too busy for an elaborate response, just say "I'm busy". Simple as that.
If someone is harassing you, then all you have to do is block them and delete them from your friend list/delete their number. Nothing good can come from reading their texts if you're trying to get them to back off.
If you're not interested in someone who's trying to text you or if you're trying to end a friendship, then simply say so. By responding slowly or not responding at all, you're leaving them in the dark wondering what they did wrong, or why you're acting like that. Be honest about your feelings. If you don't want to talk to them, explain it to them in a polite way. That way they can start moving on from you instead of wasting both your and their time.
Also, if people actually notice that you're glued to your phone pretty much 24/7, they won't believe you when you tell them that you were oh-so busy that you couldn't even respond within... 2 weeks. Shocking, I know.
2. Lash out on someone for not responding immediately
Let's face it, some people are just truly busy, and I'm not talking about the ones I mentioned in my first point. These people don't always have the time to respond within 5 minutes of you texting them. If you texted them 2 hours ago, and the last time they were online was 4 hours ago, there's no point in assuming that they're ignoring you on purpose. Especially if they haven't read your message. Don't be so paranoid. Attacking someone for being too busy to respond to your text immediately will only make them pissed off at you. It will make you look crazy and stupid. Don't do that to yourself, and especially don't do that to them. If it's really urgent, call them. If it can wait, occupy yourself with other things until they text you back. There's no point in being aggressive (or passive aggressive once they respond). It will only make them even more reluctant to respond to your messages. If you feel ignored or left out because they're genuinely reading your messages without responding, or taking days to respond, try to talk to them about it in a calm manner. Preferably face to face. Then the likelihood of them ignoring or misunderstanding you is much lower. They will probably be a lot more understanding. But what you need to understand is that not everyone is always glued to their phone.
3. Bomb someone with texts
This one is a bit tricky, since it kind of depends on what kind of relationship you have with the person. If you're really close friends, then it might be ok for you to goofily bomb them with texts when you're bored. It can be funny and totally harmless. But if they're a person you've just gotten to know or you don't have that kind of goofy/funny friendship, try not to send more than 3 texts at once. I know some people think it's a sin to double, or even triple, text someone because then you might come off as clingy or desperate. I disagree with that, though, and here's why. Sometimes, you have to share a piece of information with them, and then possibly update that information once or twice more. Example.
"Hey, I'm leaving work now, so I should be in town pretty soon."
- A little while later -
"Yo, there's actually a massive traffic jam right in front of me so I'm actually not sure how long it's going to take me to get to (x)."
- Another while later -
"The traffic has cleared up now thankfully, I'll be there in 5 minutes!"
This can happen within, let's say, 40 minutes or so. During those 40 minutes, the person on the receiving end might be too busy to read and respond to all those messages. Which means that the person who sent those texts ended up triple texting. But that's fine. The sender was just being polite and making sure that the other person knew about their whereabouts, even if the other person didn't get to read the messages when they were relevant.
Here's an example of what not to do when "bombing" someone you don't really know:
"Hey"
"Hi"
"Hello"
"What's up"
"Hi"
"What are you doing?"
"Hello"
"How are you?"
"hey"
etc etc etc.
Which leads to my next point...
4. Just say "hi" and expect them to be interested
If you genuinely want to spark an interesting conversation with this person, you've got to make it interesting. Saying "hi" is not a conversation starter. It's a greeting. A greeting is not the same as a conversation starter. A conversation starter is a question, a funny story, a confession, anything that you can actually have a conversation about. You can't have a conversation about "hi". I find it annoying when someone only texts me "hi". It's like, what am I supposed to do with this? What do you want from me? Do you really have anything significant to say to me? Or are you just texting random people "hi" to kill time?
5. Harass them with unwanted... things
Such as dick pics. Or other inappropriate pictures. On annoying/inappropriate texts in general. If they don't ask for a dick pic, just assume they don't want one. Your dick is not that glorious. If it's annoying and slightly/completely inappropriate, just don't. Please.
6. Say "k."
Alright. I get it. You're mad. You want to make a passive aggressive point. Or it's efficient (because writing an "O" in front of and "ay" after that K is so exhausting). You do it for whatever reason, but it's still annoying and awkward. And again, if you're mad at the person (for, say, ignoring you) then being passive aggressive is not a good solution. A good solution is talking about it calmly and explaining what's bothering you. Writing "k." just makes you seem mad and disinterested, even if you aren't, and it's a terrible way to express how you're feeling.
7. Start a conversation and then disappear
This is one of the most annoying things you can do to someone, especially if you haven't talked to them in a while. It goes something like this.
A: "Hey! Long time no see! How have you been, we need to hang out sometime soon again :)"
B: "Oh gosh hi! I'm good, how have you been? Hanging out sounds great, when's good for you?"
B: "I'm free on Friday at least :)"
B: "... hello?"
B: "Is everything alright?"
And then, nothing. As if person A has vanished into thin air. I get that something big might have happened which made person A drop their phone to focus on something else, but the least they can do is text back right away when they get the chance, to apologize. If you don't intend on keeping the conversation going or actually meeting up, you're not doing anything but confusing people and wasting their time. Don't do that.
That's all! If you can think of anything I've missed, please leave a comment.
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