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Combination of ADHD and Autism.(Part 1)

I figured I need to do a part 1,2,3,and maybe a 4th. GAG is being extremely stupid and keeps saying the detail is either too long or too short. -_-, for each of the symtoms and what it's like for me when I experience them. The 2nd one will be about the autistic part.


Combination of ADHD and Autism.(Part 1)


I will start with ALL of the adhd symtoms.They are what I'm more used to since I have the most severe case of ADHD. I will not correct any spelling or grammar mistakes.


Inattention


-Being disorganized


As you can tell this myTake is a living proof of my lack of organizeation. (HOLY MY CELL PHONE JUST SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME! Now i'm causing a huge disastor by accidently knocking things over trying to turn my cellphone off. :D Pause guys I have to take my night meds.....ok I finished taking my meds but ended up knocking more stuff over. So basically the usual.) I've forgotten anything else I wanted to add to this part.


-Lack of focus


Y'all aren't seeing it but my focus while wrighting this is at -9,000%.So basically the usual everyday focus level for me.Even if I focus on something with all the brain power I have.It's still not enough and my brain just drifts off.Then I forget what I was focusing on.It's really annoying when I'm trying really hard to learn things.Which sadly i'm not able to learn by myself.I will go into more details about that later and if I can rembmer to do that.


-struggling to complete tasks, even ones that seem simple


Every task in existence is extremely hard to finish.Even if your having fun and loving it so much.Trying to finish it feels impossible.Since you end up wanting to try something else.Then you want to try another thing,and another,and another.Then before you know it you have started 100 different projects in 1 hour and none of them are finished.With people with severe adhd you never complete anything.So basically majority of things you do in life are never finished.Unless someone grabs you by the ear and ripps all your teeth out making you finish.Other wise you literally don't know how to finish it.


-Hyperfocus


This part is what makes you contradict the lack of being able to focus.You end up being so excited about something you over focus.So you "hyperfocus" Which you end up obsessing over what your hyperfocusing on.You won't sleep well,want to eat,etc.Until you finish what your hyperfocusing on.Evne if you try not to hyperfocus you don't have a choice.Your brain is already set to hyperfocus and your stuck on that mode until it's complete.So it's either you finish what your hyperfocusing on or goodbye to your sanity completely.


-Have a hard time paying attention to details and a tendency to make careless mistakes.


Oh god is this part so fucking true. :D It's kind of sad and funny at the same time how bad I am at paying attention to details.Hence why this mytake won't be so great.Since I have no idea how to fix majority of the messed up I did.Plus If I have made a mess up already I don't remember it.Though I'm sure by now y'all have already noticed the messy part of this mytake.


-Have trouble staying on topic while talking, not listening to others


The not listening part is very offensive.OBJECTION! I do too listen to people!It's just that I struggle keeping my focus on what the person is saying majority of the time.Even if I'm murdering myself focing me to listen to what someone says.My mind drifts away and I end up not hearing majority of what they say.Though other times my brain glitches when hearing others.As in it's kind of like what I'm about to write as an example.(The ..... ran over a HUGE ..... but the people of ...... do not understand ..... it ..... happend to ..... ...... but I'm sure they are ......) As you can see with this poorly written sentence of what I'm talking about.So with having adhd you end up fustrated because your asking,"Who ran over what huge thing?What people?Where are they from?UNDERSTAND WHAT?! WHAT HAPPEND TO WHAT GOD DAMN IT ALL!YOUR SURE OF WHAT?!" After understanding what little I did hear.That whole sentence would have made my brain short cirket by now.Then from extreme fustration I might end up yelling at the person.I don't mean to blame them for fucking up what they said.Since it's my brain that had glitched those parts out.It's just I end up so focused on what i didn't understand it drives me bad shit crazy to find out what did they fully say.Which normally ends up with people screaming at me.Which now I have a horrible habbit of automantically agreeing when I don't fully understand what someone says.Out of fear that how long it might take me to actually understand.The person will scream my head off and it will freak me out and I will want to hide from them.


-Be forgetful about daily activities


Oh god this part of adhd can be really funny.Though also really sad.I had just did this kind of mistake about 4 hours ago.I had made me a cup of something to drink.Then left while this machine made it.Though I ended up forgetting straight off that I had made it.So then 3 hours later I randomly remembered,ran to the kitchen,and it was gone and poured out.So yeah this type of thing happens 24/7 and I'm forgetting things CONSTANTLY.I have no idea how I keep up with anything.All I do is just set up a lot of alarms and remember they are for me medication stuff.Sometimes i will even forget how to write certain things.Like i've forgotten how to form sentences sometimes.


-constantly losing or misplacing things (keys, wallet, phone, documents, bills)


This one is horrible.Since I'm losing things a lot.Though I used to be worse as a kid.I would lose my shoes CONSTANTLY.Though a lot of the time I'm still ending up raiding my whole house and turning it upside down to find things I've lost.Which majority of the time I never find them again. :(


-underestimating the time it will take you to complete tasks


What is this time you are speaking of?No,I'm serious I have no idea what time your talking about.I do not have the ability to know how long it will take me to do most things.Mainly due to the fact that I get distracted which who knows when I will remember to complete something.If I even remember to complete it in the first place.


-Be easily distracted by things like trivial noises or events that are usually ignored by others.


Oh if only this part was that simple and the only distracting things were trivial noises and events.Yeah that is barely the half of it all.EVERYTHING DISTRACTS THE SHIT OUT OF YOU! Your own skin distracts you,your thoughts distract you,your voice distracts you,you become distracted by the silence of a room,losing your train of throught distracts you.So i'm not kidding when I say EVERYTHING IS DISTRACTING! Only way to not be distracted is to not think at all.I'm not even kidding.I have to do this when ever I play any speed related things.Like this mini game on Alpha Sapphire pokemon game.I literally can't let a single thought come in to my head or think at all.I make myself almost brain dead so I can only focus on the game and get the highest score possible.If I don't do this then I can be distracted so easily it's kind of sad.It's like 3 year olds are harder to distracted compared to me.


Hyperactivity


-Fidget and squirm when seated.


This one depends.Somedays your fidgeting like hell and can't sit.Other days your sitting and it's not a problem at all.Along with what kind of chair your sitting in.I've noticed for me specific chairs make it impossible to sit still.They drive me bat shit crazy and like I'm doing some kind of seat dance from how I can't sit still in them.Along with having to do some kind of physical movement while sitting.Other wise being 100% still will drive you up the walls.the feeling of not being able to sit still will even drive me to the point of becoming so irritated I will lash out at others.If they ask to many questions.Since my mind can't get over that annoying fidgetty feeling.


-Get up frequently to walk or run around.


This one is the same as sitting.It just depends on your mood for that day.Somedays your sitting and standing up every 5 seconds and never able to find a comfortable position.that will happen normally 5 times out of each week.So 5 out of 7 days within the week.I have no idea what that equels up to in a whole year.Just know it's A LOT!


-Run or climb a lot when it's not appropriate.


This part actually does die down some as you get older.Still you do end up doing it way more often than normal adults.Even more it's really not appropriate since you just act like a big kid while doing it.Plus you don't even notice the people around.All your thinking about is how you need to run,climb,etc.


-Have trouble playing quietly or doing quiet hobbies


Well duh! Of course it's hard to do it all so quietly.Since your wanting to blab someones ears off about what your doing.Plus you end up getting extremely into the hobby you forget about how loud you actually need to be.You end up extremely consumed by how much fun your having you don't even noticed your scream into someones ear about how much fun your having.Until someone tells you that your being to loud and gets mad at you.Then you shut up and become extremely quiet and feel sad for the rest of the day.Like having fun doing what your loving is wrong to others.that they just get mad at you and you don't even know why.Along with not even meaning to do it.


- Always be "on the go"


ugh I had this one with a great passion.Thanks to the "on the go" feeling sleeping really well is impossible.Since even when your sleeping you feel like your on the go still.So you end up being hyper while your sleeping and never falling full dead asleep.


-Talk excessively


And you all thought only women could talk a lot. :P Well jokes on you!Anyone with adhd will talk excessivly and EXTREMELY fast.You will have issues understand what the hell they are talking about.I know my boyfriend does and feels like his ears are about to fall off at times. :D


Impulsivity


-Impatience


Yeah thanks to this part I have gotten into A LOT of trouble.Since waiting for certain things makes me feel like i'm going to die of bordom.Which is rare since I'm normally never bored.Yet waiting for anything makes me want to beat my head into a desk.When I was a little kid and had to wait in waiting rooms.Yeah I didn't wait and took all the chairs in the entire room and blocked all the doors and build them in weird ways.That or I would be like a dog and just rip things up out of waiting.Then I become obessed with when the thing I'm dying to finish or something that's coming.To hurry up and come already and I can't think about anything else but what I'm waiting for.This can happen even with things that aren't that important to majority of people.To me MAJORITY of things are that improtant and I go over the edge crazy waiting for it.


-have poor self-control


yeah i don't know the meaning of having self-control.I mean I've worked on it but still have a long way to go.I still struggle controling anything I do.So that's a constant battle 24/7.


-act recklessly or spontaneously without regard for consequences


Hence why as a kid I would give my mom a heart attack 24/7.Since I would do reckless and spontaneous things even at the age of 2.If my mom looked away for a second I would disapear.Which one time my mom looked all over the house and outside for me.Then she realized I probably went down our drie way and down the main road.Which I did do.So my mom is running down the drive way screaming my name frantically.When she hearts a car slam on it's breaks.She thought they had probably ran over me.Lucky for me and her the person didn't and it was our neighbor who picked me up and took me back to my mom.Aparently I was walking straight for my grandma's house which is like a 10 minute walk.Which again I was only 2 years old at the time. :D Even though I'm older now.I still do those crazy ass sponaneus things.I just do less of the reckless part ever since my car wreck and it flipped upside down.


-Having a hard time waiting to talk or react


Oh god am I horrible at this.My sense of time of when to talk in a conversation is extremely shitty.I keep enterupting people like crazy.Since my waiting and racting to talk is so bad off.Which thanks to how bad my reaction time is.I'm horrible at playing really fast pace games.My brain is literally not capable at keeping up with everything go on in that moment.Which I will bash myself badly about how bad my reaction time is.


-Have a hard time waiting for their turn.


Fuck waiting for my turn.The longer I wait the more irritated I'm going to feel.So then my impulsiveness is going to want to run over the person making me wait.Which also messes up my reacting time.Since if the things are going to slow.I keep messing up and clicking way to soon and messing up.In my head to who ever makes me wait a turn.I'm cussing them out and wishing the most horrible things on them for making me wait.I know that seems extreme but to me it's putting pressure on my head and driving me up the walls.


-Blurt out answers before someone finishes asking them a question.


This is why I would always get kicked out of answer question games in school.I would suck at waiting and just blurt out the answer.I become so excited I can't wait and have to say it.Other wise I will explode and that won't be a pretty sight.Since the longer a person forces me to wait until I can say what is on my mind.The more I'm going to hate them,feel irritated,and start wanting to scream at them to shut the fuck up already.I will serious reach the point of wanting to rip the persons head off if they force me to wait for so long.I won't listen to anything they say since i'm more focused on not forgetting what I was going to say.Then by the time that person finally shuts up.I still end up forgetting. -_-


-Frequently interrupt or intrude on others.


This is why I do not have many friends at all.Trying not to interrupt someone or intrude.Is kind of like making yourself trying not to breathe.After a point you have to breathe other wise you die.Well that feel does happen with this.Not the dying part.Just the extreme need to do it.Majority of the time I don't even realize that I've interrupted or intruded until after a couple of seconds after I did.that or they tell me that I did.This I will agree is what kills people with adhd socially and at work.Since it makes others just not want to be around you.Though from my point of view.It feels like those people never want to hear what I have to say.So they are always blocking me out.So I feel like I have to interrupt.Other wise they will never let me get what I have to say in.Then they become pissed off at me and never wanting anything to do with me.So hence why adhd people will be mostly forever alone.


-Start conversations at inappropriate times.


The best way to desribe this one is what I did this one time.I was living with a friend and had another roommate besides that one friend.We also had some people over that night.Which me and this dude was going crazy and mixing up alcoholic drinks with normal ones.Creating weird mix matches.So yes I was a little buzz that night.Still I was running down the hall and slammed the door open to one of my friends rooms.Aparnetly both my roommates were arguing and not happy.Though silly me just runs into the room yelling and laughing at the silly drinks I had made.Which they weren't impressed due to how they were not happy at that moment.So then it took me a while until I noticed that I should just go since they are really not happy.Even though that night I was a little buzzed this does happen almost 95% of the time.I'm horrible at knowin when to talk to others at the right time.


To be continued.......

Combination of ADHD and Autism.(Part 1)
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