The Humble Bayonet And Why You Want One For The Zombie Apocalypse

The humble bayonet and why you'll want one in you're apocalypse arsenal.

This is my WW1 bayonet. Basically it's 20 inches of high-temper steel ground to brutally stout thrusting tip and a razors edge on one side. In this essay I'm going to explain why it's the best you can ask for in terms of your melee survival weapons. Let's begin.

If you're a guy, and I'd bet some girls too, then you've seen those ridiculous looking zombie apocalypse machetes like this:

Ooh it has a spiky thing and green paracord, it's green because zombies and that's cooooool😒

Where to start with this garbage? Uh, it's stamped metal guys! Hello? You swing that $9.95 piece of shit once and it'll break off at the hilt. Not something you have to ever worry about with an authentic bayonet.

As as you can see, the spine of the blade is 1/4 inches thick all the way out to the final taper of the tip. You could use the thing as a flat-bar for Christ sake.

The bayonet is a thrusting weapon by design, but many people underestimate just how ideal that is opposed to slashing weapons like katanas, and hand axes. Sure they make it look easy in the movies, but if you think about it, how much skill would it really take to cut a zombies head off while it's flailing it's arms at you and trying to eat your giblets? And since zombies don't feel any pain, slashing at its extremities likely would slow it down much.

Also, people often assume that you can slice through solid bone like butter. Have you ever tried to cut through a deer antler with an axe? At minimum it still takes SEVERAL hard swings to finally cut/break through it, so using that as a benchmark I don't think lopping arms and legs off willy nilly is even close to realistic.

Whereas with a bayonet, thrusting a 14" blade into the midsection of a zombie is much easier given you have a much larger area you can hit with guaranteed massive damage to internal organs which would still do the trick.

But Dez you have to destroy the brai-

NO! WRONG!

In any real probability that zombies could occur in real life, the virus hijacking the human brain would still rely on the function of the other bodily systems in order for its host to actually move and attack others. Therefore, massive internal hemorrhaging caused by a stab wound would still cause shock and organ failure to devastate the body and drop the zombie just as easily. So there ya go😎

Now, back to why the bayonet is so awesome.

See that ring? That's arguably the most awesomest part of this beauty. It's what makes the possibilities as numerous as the imagination.

The obvious use is the ability to mount this weapon to a rifle, but also you could easily rig it to a pipe to make a spear, or mount a flashlight to it, or tie a strap to the handle to give you a more sure grip whilst you stab.

To top it off, the long, straight edge of the bayonet allows it to double as an all around knife which is an essential survival necessity🔪 Anything from dicing tomatoes and skinning the squirrel you snared, to hacking brush and even splitting smaller chunks of firewood, this blade is both sharp and strong enough to take care of with relative ease.

So for all my fellow survival preppers, make sure to save some space for a bayonet in your bug out bag👍🏼

One more just for laughs😂


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What Girls Said 2

  • In
    "it's green because zombies and that's cooooool😒" How impish of you. I'd want to have that green bayonet but it just lacks the circle you were talking about. Sad. I could use some versatility.
    I'd want my bayonet to be colorful and not just the plain, stereotypical silver-brown color combo.

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    • I guess you could spray paint it rainbows and sparkles if you like, but I like more of a steel and bloodstain motif myself. I guess it's just the nostalgia in me. As far as that cheap machete, they are poorly made and would break. Yeah it looks cool but it's not a real weapon. Just a toy compared to the bayonet.

    • Depends on how you use both weapons, I guess. A bayonet would appear as a toy if a person is just messing up with it. Whereas a machete would look cool if a person using it has badass, savage, zombie-apocalypse-caliber killing skills.
      For the most part, however, I think a bayonet would be indeed useful for an apocalypse! And thanks to this myTake, I plan on getting one soon 😛

    • Your right of course, it comes down to skill with almost any weapon. Happy to help😊

  • Damn remind me not to surprise u

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What Guys Said 1

  • Uhh I feel that a bayonet is a bit risky as you will have to get fairly close to a zombie and that's risky and multiple kills at a time would be clunky and hard which makes it dangerous when large hordes come at you so I'd still prefer a katana especially when you think how decomposed the zombies are no way those shitty old bones are gonna hold up against a swing to the head but the greatest weapon in a zombie apocalypse (melee anyway) is a spear
    s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...9749939d6c.jpg

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    • But a bayonet can also be a spear. As could any knife really. Like I said, decomposed zombies are night of living dead type, I'm talking world war z virus zombies that require the living and functioning body of the host to infect. That means a beating heart. So extreme and sudden blood still causes shock which in many cases immediately stops the heart. Dead zombie.

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    • Depends on the bayonet I guess, mine has a 14" blade and a 6"handle and I've seen larger. I doubt that spear head is any bigger. Yeah you would want one of those tiny pistol bayonets😄

      While a katana is longer like any proper sword would be longer, you still have to swing it in an wider arc which leaves you wide open between each swing and would not be usable in a hallway or any smaller type space.

      Fighting zoms melee style would be extremely risky anywayz regardless of how many you were fighting. I agree definitely last resort when the bullets run dry.

      I think a spear is an excellent choice too, but I like the bayonet because it is very versatile and so strongly made.

    • I meant wouldn't want a pistol bayonent😅

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