Do you like dark humour? Whats your darkest joke?

Dark humour to me is like a child with cancer, it never gets old.

Do you like dark humour? Whats your darkest joke?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • "My Girlfriend wanted me to treat her like a princess for her birthday. So I took her out, got her drunk, and crashed the car."

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Most Helpful Guy

  • A cruise ship is sinking and all havoc is breaking loose. Everybody scrambles to the lifeboats. Before loading the lifeboats, a teacher yells, "Children first!". Cop says to the teacher, "Fuck the children!" A priest walks up to the teacher and cop and says, "Do we have enough time?"

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What Girls Said 8

  • This made me laugh and yet go "awww" at the same time..

    http://i.imgur.com/7aFulED.png

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  • Sahih Muslim Book 041, Number 6985: Also in the Hamas Charter.
    Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying:

    "The last hour would not come unless the Muslims will fight against the Jews and the Muslims would kill them until the Jews would hide themselves behind a stone or a tree and a stone or a tree would say: Muslim, or the servant of Allah, there is a Jew behind me; come and kill him; but the tree of Gharqad would not say, for it is the tree of the Jews."

    Haha haha ahahahahahahahahahaha

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  • I do like dark humour :P Uh... My favourite dark humour joke isn't mine so I can't take any credit for it but it's something like:

    What was the last thing to go through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?
    Their feet.

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  • The hating of breast feeding in public needs to stop. I can raise my cat anyway I want to.

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  • I love dark humor and one of my favorite comedians that does it is Jimmy Carr. ^^
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DuBlbMmjBrg

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  • Why are Iranian women always so high?
    Because they are always getting stoned! Bahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhhahhhahhahhhhahaahahahahahahhhahahhhhhha!
    I made that one up

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  • Yes XD

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  • Lmfao I don't think it gets much darker than joking about your child's death

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    • 2mo

      Lol it does get darker. Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Yeah, neither have the Ethiopians.

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    • 2mo

      @Intraluminal haha those are good ones

      What's the fastest land animal? An Ethiopian chicken.

    • 2mo

      lol I didn't get it until now... okay fine that's worse.

What Guys Said 11

  • While on a hike one of the guys asks what happens if we see a mountain lion. I joke that we throw his chawawa at it and run. That is why he brought that tiny dog with him in the first place right?

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    • 2mo

      Did that really happen?

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    • 2mo

      oh god xD probably the only thing that "dog" is good for in the wild is attracting predators

    • 2mo

      Now your talking that tiny thing is a pain. That dog makes a better football than a companion. Some of those dogs are nice dogs but not that one.

  • A seal walks into a Bar.
    He sits down and the bartender asks, "what can I get you?"
    The Seal replies, "Anything but a Canadian Club on the Rocks."

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  • How do all ethnic jokes start? - With a look over your shoulder

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  • Haha I love it. Mine are usually racist to my black friend at night. Like dude where did you go? All I see is floating white teeth haha I'm terrible.

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  • I'm a fan, it's like that time Stephen Hawking walked into a bar... just kidding.

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  • Wow, my darkest joke would offend at least 1/3 of population here.

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    • 2mo

      Try us lol

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    • 2mo

      I was kidding, I'm Mexican and didn't get invited to the piƱata party! Haha.

    • 2mo

      @TonyRyanAgain I was talking about intraluminal xD by the way sorry you werent invited :(

  • I don't know if it's dark humor or just insensitive, but:

    If we had more nets in Africa, we could save millions of mosquito lives by preventing them from getting AIDS.

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    • 2mo

      Yup, thats dark humour alright lol

      cause its about black people

  • It can be quite offensive at times though, it's just like English humor, it may not be funny to others that are not familiar with the subject or culture

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  • How do you get a hundred dead babies into a bathtub? With a blender.
    How do you get them out again? With a straw.

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