Search Results: controlling boyfriend

Hey guys so me and my boyfriend have been getting into a lot of arguments over it recently and neither of us are willing to compromise so I want to know opinions.

I follow other guys on Instagram, I know them from school and extra curricular and we don’t interact with each others post and only message to ask questions about performance and midterm dates, study guides and homework or missed classes or extracurricular (I’m in a group where we do singing and dancing and we catch eachother up on choreography for anyone who’s missed. Almost all of these chats are group chats with multiple women and men. None of them have my phone number or my Snapchat as that feels like a different level, and no one has yet (I have my boyfriend posted and always make it pretty clear from the get go I have a boyfriend like if I meet people in class and it’s a group and someone’s like “what’s everyone doing after? Anyone down to grab lunch?” I’ll respond with “sorry, I really miss my boyfriend so I think I’m just going to head home for today”) but if anyone did make a flirtatious or suggestive comment my immediate response would be to block them and probably say something along the lines of “not cool… you know I have a boyfriend so fuck right off”, even being in group chats together if someone crossed that line I genuinely wouldn’t care about the missed opportunities for school work and info because it’s a broken boundary and I would find someone else in class or another group who would be more respectful.

to him, he still feels like it’s disrespectful and that no guy would be okay with this. To me, I feel like it’s controlling and while if he specifically said to unadd anyone specifically I would, not being able to add any feels like too much and if we don’t come to a conclusion now what’s it going to look like in the future? If our kids go out with a friend and their dad can I not get his number to check on my kids? What about getting coworkers contacts to switch shifts?

I keep seeing it all over the place, this idea that you can’t do something even though it’s within your control. For example, someone who says “I can’t afford to have a hobby!” There are plenty of hobbies that don’t cost money. “I can’t work! Nobody’s hiring!” Yes they are, if you really, truly need money then you can find a job, you’re just not looking everywhere. “I can’t get a boyfriend/girlfriend!” Yes, you can. You just need to get out of the house more and make an effort.

I don’t know, it just ticks me off to see so many people act helpless and refuse to believe otherwise. You can do anything, be anything, you just have to put in the effort. And yeah, it’s hard sometimes, but if you really want something then it’s worth it.