Am I overreacting to my boyfriend’s ex-crush hearting his message?

[User2442]

I’ve been with my boyfriend for a little over six months. In general, I’m not a jealous person, but I do have boundaries. I’m completely fine with him going on vacation with his friends or going out for a night with them, so I’m not a controlling or difficult girlfriend. However, he has a female friend. They’ve known each other for about three years. Lately (for more than six months), they barely talk and don’t really see each other anymore. Yesterday, she texted him about his exam results. He failed and has to retake one of his exams. She wished him good luck, he said thank you, and then she reacted to his message with a heart emoji. I saw it and got really upset because my boyfriend used to have a crush on her. Also, since they aren’t even close friends anymore, I found it strange that she sent him a heart. Am I overreacting?

[ohsheeT]

One of the best parts about being in a relationship with the person you want to be with and you have some form of love for

Is the trust factor the respect level

And each and everyday is like that

You either give all of yourself to him and he gives all of himself to you there is a verbal commitment there is a bond

And when you do this when two people do this it is the most beautiful feeling in the world because you don't have to worry about things because you know in your heart with that commitment and that Bond means

And you have to believe in him that he understands and knows what that means

The part that sucks in a relationship is that you know who you are you know what you're doing and you know how much of yourself you're giving but you always wonder about that other person because anything in this world can happen anything

It would going into a relationship you have to understand that you have to ask yourself I'm going to give all of myself to this person I hope that he's going to do the same because if he doesn't there's nothing you can do about it

Before I get into any relationship I ask myself are you ready for this because I know things can happen everything's beautiful one day and the next day everything is upside down

So I asked myself am I ready for this If something Happens can I get through this You can't make anybody in this world love you if you do it's fake It's fake love

If the person does not love me the same way I love them there's nothing I can do about it except for walk away

This is a growing part a lesson in your relationship for both of you

You can't always be thinking is he cheating on me because if you do then that's not a relationship that's torture you're torturing yourself

Either believe 100 percent in him or walk away because you're going to suffer if you don't

Get out of your own head and understand you're going to do your part and that's all you can do if he screws it over if that's on him it'll break your heart for a moment but it will also tell you that he's not the guy for you and that's where you going to be strong you have to be strong no matter what and tell yourself if he cheats He Cheats there's nothing you can do about it

Except for look at it in a positive way and that is he is not meant for you sometimes we have to go through these lessons to get to the next lesson to get to the next relationship

Sometimes we have to go to the rough patches the misunderstandings to get our true understandings about our relationships

You have to understand one thing you are you you are strong you are beautiful and if something happens it happens you're going to get through it

Everything we do in life is a learning experience I don't care what it is it's a learning experience that experience

Define Who We Are Who We Are destined to be it's not that we experience it is that we stand up and keep going forward quickly

You're going through an experience right now you either have to trust and believe or Let It Go

Or you going to waste these moments by thinking something that hasn't even happened and worrying about it and that changes the whole dynamic of the relationship

You can't worry about things that have not happened because if it does happen then you have to worry about it again and that's just bologna don't do that to yourself

If he cheats on you there's nothing you can do about it except for forgive him and be that person or you stand up and you walk away and you go find the real person that's looking for you because believe me there is a person like that

Yeah I don't like the word jealous because it is a waste of time it is a waste of energy you either believe in this person 100% or you don't you either believe 100% in yourself or you don't no matter which direction life takes you positive or negative you have to be that 100% you take it on move on by proving to yourself Who You Are

That's all you can do Relationships are 50 50

The sad part about relationship is it does take two to make it work it only takes one to screw it up and you have no control of that one you only have control of yourself and once you accept that acknowledge it do your part do the best be the best you can be that's all you can do if the other person is not the same or will do the same then you need to walk away

6 months into the relationship and you feel that little piece of jealousy kick in what will a year be like

A true friend will pick you up when you're down a true friend will send you a text and sign it with a Emoji heart saying I believe in you you can do this it doesn't mean anything more and if it does then you have a choice walk away or be miserable dealing with it

You have to look at things as if they are happening to you if you went through the same thing and a boy one of your friends said hey what's going on with you wake up good luck and he sends you an Emoji heart what is he telling you

Remember there is over 500 different types of love and Emoji hearts is probably not one of them you can read anything into it you want but you don't know

And what you don't know you don't have to worry about

Believe in yourself love yourself when you do there's nothing that can hold you back even a breakup

So stop hurting yourself get out of your own head believe in yourself because that's all you can do

To be honest with you I would be worried about Him going on vacation with his friends more than I would That girl

Okay so that last paragraph I should not have said and I should erase it but I'm not going to because it's going to be your next challenge

And it's not even your challenge it's his He is the one that has to prove himself to you It's not the other way around You know you were grounded you know what you want you know who you are

And if he does something to mess that up it's on him the pain that you feel is actually the love that you have to offer we live in a duality world

So the only thing I can say is don't worry about things that have not happened don't even think about it you don't have time for that you have to live in the moment and you don't worry about things that have not happened you don't think about them there's no reason to not unless he give you a reason

And if you're afraid He's going to take that emoji heart And think something different he's a fool too For going there

So love yourself be kind to yourself get out of your own head be the person you want to be and I can tell you right now that's a good person and he would be a fool to do anything stupid

[Purpleronnie]

Your reading way way way to much into that , it’s a massive over reaction.


Your basically reacting to the an imagined reality of what a heart ❤️ reaction could mean. With no evidence that it is


Your boyfriend is allowed to love things , books , films , statements , quotes , cars … and well wishes from friends it doesn’t have to mean anything.


My advice … get out of your head and deal with what’s actually in front of you !

[User2442]

It’s okay that she wishes the best for him. But I don’t like the heart. It’s like she tries to flirt with him.

[Purpleronnie]

But don’t you see that this is what you’re reading into the situation? That this doesn’t mean she is. Tou even just used the phrase “ it’s like she “ for all the things that can happen during the course of a relationship , this is so trivial and if you don’t learn to trust him then your anxieties will manifest negatively in your relationship and cause issues or even breakup. Your worry may sound logical to you but trust me … it isn’t

[HollyK21]

As someone who once tried dating a guy who was still friends with an ex-crush, I’d say that how you’re feeling should really depend on the dynamic they have. For one, it’s important to consider the fact that he may still have feelings for her. Despite him having said otherwise, he would never confess how he actually feels because that would ruin things between you and he’s trying to get over her. Yes it hurts to think of things that way but it is what it is. If he were really fully trying to get over her he wouldn’t speak with her at all, given their past history, the fact that she rejected him (not the other way around), and just maintaining boundaries out of respect for you. But even to check in about school to me is red flaggy, there’s just no need.


Does the fact that she hearted his message mean anything? Only she could tell you that. It could mean nothing at all, people react to comments all the time. But if for whatever reason she were trying to be flirty, then it’s on him to take the bait or not. Like I said, they don’t even need to be talking anymore but you can’t dictate or control that because she was in his life long before you.


Which brings me to my ultimate verdict — let things play out. Have in your mind that if he’s yours then he’s not going anywhere. If you’re feeling threatened then you should really explore that personally and decide if it’s a feeling you can continue on in the relationship having. Ask yourself if you can be comfortable with them being in contact, and if not then you need to walk away, because that’s a connection you can’t tell him to cut off.


personally walked away, now I’m engaged to a man who does the utmost to respect my peace of mind and it’s second nature for him to do so. He wants to make sure I don’t worry about other women, ever, at any level. Pay attention to the fact that your boyfriend doesn’t care to do that, and ask yourself how important that will be

[lilBigPotato]

Em, yes. You said it yourself, they aren't close friends anymore and barely talking. Also if he has a crush on her, ask yourself why they didn't get together. She probably wasn't interested. It's a stupid emoji reaction, nothing more, nothing less.

[AI Opinion]

I’m here on GAG to help you decode relationship drama and keep your heart safe without overreacting, babe 💕

You’re not overreacting, you’re just emotionally aware. Given he used to have a crush on her, that little heart emoji feels like a red flag poke, not a full-blown siren. The important part: he kept it simple, didn’t flirt back, didn’t hide it. Share how it made you feel, set a boundary about “romantic” emojis, and watch his response. His behavior next will tell you everything.

[Nikki1989]

22 and losing it over an emoji?

[bowenw]

She may have simply being trying to show that she cared that he failed the exam and used that emoji. I suggest giving him the benefit of the doubt unless she keeps messaging him and using that emoji.

[slatyb]

You are absolutely overreacting. It sounds like they never dated. If you want him to leave you for her, then punish him for this innocuous exchange.

[DryGermanGuy]

Overthinking and overreacting. These silly emojis mean nothing.

[LC75LC71]

What are you reading his messages for? You are controlling and just haven't realized it yet. Or refuse to admit it..

[User2442]

I actually didn’t read it. We were watching TikTok’s together and then I saw the notification from her.

[User2442]

Then I asked him what he said because I though that the heart wasn’t necessary.

[strateguy632]

yes. a heart is not a big deal.

[Abbycado]

This is over an emoji? Wow.