Dear Feminists, There Is Nothing Wrong With Being A Stay-At-Home Mother

[Anonymous]

As a woman who was raised in the 90s in a very "progressive" environment, I have always been told that I must be a career-woman. Women who chose to stay at home with their children were seen as "lesser". For many years I did what I was told - I worked hard, I did well in school, I went to college. My only focus in life was my career. The problem was that I didn't feel this was actually what I wanted. I felt as though I had been forced down a path without even being give a choice.

When I turned 22 I met an amazing guy and we fell for one another almost instantly. After we had been together for a few months or so, he asked me if I ever wanted to have children. I gave the same line that any of my friends would had given: "no, I don't want kids, I want to focus on my career." But later that night, for the first time in my life, I thought about it much more deeply. The thought of having children is scary but for the first time I realized that I did want kids. I've always loved kids, and loved caring for kids - that's why I wanted to be a doctor. However, everyone had been pushing me so virulently towards my career that I hadn't properly thought about it.

After I finished college, we decided to have a child. Our daughter was born two years ago last week. I had planned on going to medical school while she was still young but after she was born, I fell in love with her. She instantly became my whole world; a little person that I loved more than anything. How could I get up every morning and leave her? My husband, to our benefit, is much more capable at compartmentalizing than myself, so he able to go off to work each morning to ensure that we have enough money to survive. I couldn't do that, I loved her too much, and in the end I decided to become a stay at home mother. I was condemned by my "progressive" friends with whom I quickly fell out of favor. They turned their noses up at me for daring go against the trend of being a career-woman. I also received a lot of pejorative and sarcastic comments from old friends that I hadn't talked to in years.

Of course, it needs to be mentioned that not all progressive feminists have a problem with stay-at-home mothers. However, it must also be mentioned that in my experience the only people who have ever made negative or pejorative comments with regard to being a stay-at-home mother are feminists. This can't be ignored.

We all want equal rights for women, there is no question there. However, we need to be careful not to alienate the women who genuinely want traditionally feminine jobs (such as being a stay-at-home mother). Our daughter is 2 years old now, so I have met a lot of stay-at-home mothers and the majority of them have had very similar experiences. The simple act of wanting to spend time with and love your children is somehow, in the eye of a lot of progressive feminists, worthy of ostracization. These criticisms are largely irrelevant to us because we love our children and we love that we are able to care for them whenever they need it. However, it does matter to the young women who are being coerced into a career when they may well be much happier as mothers.

Personally, I think we should be trying to maximize personal freedom for women. We should be giving women the freedom to do whatever they want, not forcing or coercing them to do certain things because it makes the numbers look more "equal". Forcing women to do what people believed was the "right thing" is the reason we were confined to the home in the first place. Lets not make the same mistake by confining women to the workplace, because there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a stay at home mother.

[JohnDoe3000]

"The simple act of wanting to spend time with and love your children is somehow, in the eye of a lot of progressive feminists, worthy of ostracization."

I think you haven't fully thought this through... I mean I'm sure the father of your children also wants to spend time with them and misses them when he's at work. For some reason you think it's completely logical for you to stay at home, fulltime, while the father works fulltime, only because you feel like spending time with your children, sounds a bit princessy to me... (especially considering all those working mothers and fathers who have no choice.) Also, what happens when your marriage/relationship ends and you have no career prospects (and wouldn't even have had an education had you not listened to "feminists who told you to plan for a career": you can always switch from a career to being a homemaker, the other way around is not so easy, so guess which path is smartest to choose when you're young)? This is what (mainstream) feminists mean when they say you should maybe think twice about just giving in to your impulses to stay with your children all day.

P. S. I may be biased because I want more women to become career women for my own selfish reasons: I'm attracted to independent, ambitious women and fully believe I would be bored to death if I ever got stuck with a stay-at-home mother...

[Heera]

I totally agree. Both parents should raise the child not only the one staying at home and both parents deserve the same amount of time with their child. It's just interesting that so many men complain about women needing money from them then the same men complain about women being independent.
At the end of the day people should choose what suits them anyway without trying to please others. You can't blame feminism because you didn't take the right choice for you earlier, this is why I find this myTake pretty stupid, and I'm not even a feminist

[lumos]

I'm a feminist. I only believe being a stay at home mom is wrong if you're forced into doing it by your family/husband/society. All of the feminists I personally know are for free choice, i. e. you're free to choose to stay at home or go to work as long as it's *your* choice, not anyone else's.
Feminists who are against stay at home moms just because, are very backwards thinking people.

[Heera]

You made good points, such a shame all the downvoters stopped reading at "I'm a feminist", but well, they're all supressed men I guess. Poor them

[lumos]

@Heera I don't care. Thankfully men like that are a bit harder to come by in real life, where I live.

[Peskyn3gr0]

Exactly, these idiots on this website don't get that. To the them, feminism is the root of all evil.

[Accipiter]

The Rockefeller family created Feminism to annihalate the stay at home mom, by raising the cost of living for the middle class family in order to FORCE the wife to go out and find a job in order to pay taxes for a heavy socialistic society that relies on heavy taxes. They did this because it gets children in school much sooner. And the more time young children stay in school away from their parents, the more influence the state has over those young impressionable minds. The children are no longer raised by the parents, but they are instead raised by the state. This destroys the family structure and promotes statism. What better way to do it by propagating the minds of young women by telling them that being a stay at home mom does not contribute to society, and that she is nothing more than a slave to her husband (even though that can't be further from the truth).

Raising your children the way you want to raise them is a very rewarding life experience. Don't let the state rob them of their innocence.

[Mrwoo99]

Finally someone has woken up to see the truth

[FatherJack]

Correct Sir , they are also by marriage & female lineage an integral part of the House of Rothschild.

[Mrwoo99]

@FatherJack this world is so corrupt. I knew feminism had dark intentions, the problem is feminism is becoming ingrained in to our society and culture like orthodox Islam is in Saudi abrabia.

[Kylesar]

This is for those women who are saying that feminist have no problem with stay at home mothers

thoughtcatalog.com/.../
www.huffingtonpost.com/.../...women_b_1615234.html
www.theatlantic.com/.../
nymag.com/.../index6.html
jezebel.com/.../the-feminist-housewife-is-such-bullshit

For anyone saying these aren't really feminists or this isn't really feminism, I offer you 3 words: No True Scotsman

[Laura_Marx]

oh goddd, that last one even cites fucking "Lean In", lmaooo. They are feminists, of course. But they're awful feminists!! oh god! fuckign lifbems

[Mayamoon02]

Feminists gave us the right to work at a time being a housewife was the only choice (or get severely underpaid at a job).
Just cause a few bad apples use feminism as an excuse to spread ignorance and hate - doesn't mean the whole movement is rotten.

I'm sorry you were surrounded by critical friends but unfortunately people hate those that make choices based purely on happiness.
I feel a lot of jealousy is going on from women who don't have the option to stay at home to raise the babies.
They call it feminism - but it's not.

I'm pregnant at 21 - and seeing loads of posts of facebook saying things like,
"Girls getting pregnant. Im travelling the world" as if having a baby de-values our worth. Poor souls. They don't understand we are choosing our paths!

It is a very sad world if we prioritise making money over our own children.
Feminism as helped making it more acceptable for men to be stay at home dads if they wish.

[devilish-cutie]

this is what happenes when people preach about feminism but don+t know basics of it

feminism is not against traditional roles but about giving genders freedom to choose lifestyle they prefer. before there was only traditional way so traditionals feel attacked cause feminism talks against that, but the only problem w it is that traditional way was the only way in society, robbing us of our freedom. In the same way men feel attacked; feminism is not war against men and traditional way, it's about freedom

But economic empowerment is very important cause if a woman financially depends only on the men in her life that she can lose - be it war, illness etc. She might not have any other source of finances for herself and her kids.

[vishna]

If one partner is capable of staying home to raise the children and there is enough money being made to do so, that's a good set up. However, I think that other parent should at least try to bring in some bacon. I wouldn't want to have a child and never buy anything for it with money that I earned. I get it's your husband, so, you see you two as a team. But my mind doesn't work in the way that someone else provides everything for my child-clothes, food, a roof over their head, transportation, etc.

[AriadneSky]

technically any parent staying at home IS earning money. they are doing end the clock work that professionals would get paid over 1090,000 $ for a year. the numbers have been worked out by professionals.

[vishna]

@AriadneSky I just don't see it that way. That's not bringing anything in, that's just making sure the other person's money is saved.

[AriadneSky]

e see things differently because you believe in slave labour..

[vishna]

@AriadneSky "you believe in slave labour.." No. That's just really childish to say. I have my way of thinking about stay at home parents and you have yours.

[OPBinYYC]

@AriadneSky What? Ok, work is not sitting in front of the television watching reality television or playing on Snapchat/Instagram or Facebook while your kids are at daycare or in school. Nor is it work to put dishes in a dishwasher, push a button and the dishes are clean. Laundry takes 15 minutes if you don't count the time to wash and dry (you're not doing the washing and drying the machine is). Ok so with that being said actual work which is when labour is performed. Cooking supper (doesn't she have to eat as well, everyone does so this doesn't even count). Picking up the kids or dropping off (well if you have kids count taxi time, even then the person chose to have children and it's part of being a parent you don't get paid to do that). I believe it is a team effort as you've said, one parent bringing in income is his function/role whilst the other rears and raises the children that being her function. One trades time for money, while the other trades time for parenting/nurturing.

[OPBinYYC]

@AriadneSky @AriadneSky Technically I don't know where your figures are coming from for the amount you specified (not even sure what the amount is since you put the dollar sign after the amount & the comma is in the wrong place, regardless if that is the number $1,090,000 then you must be smoking some crack & need help. Professionals? If you mean nanny's or housekeepers then that is a blatant lie. Around the clock, I guess you get paid for sleeping, peeing etc. With the numbers you gave it would be $124.43 per hour if they are working 24hrs a day, 365 days a year. If you averaged all the so called professionals (nanny's or housekeepers) average wages per year then it's around $13.60 per hour.

[OPBinYYC]

@AriadneSky I fix cars for fun but it doesn't mean I'm a professional so I would never expect to get paid that to do that type of work, and putting a bandaid on a cut doesn't make you a doctor!

www.payscale.com/research/US/Job=Nanny/Hourly_Rate

Ok enough of trying to make it more than it is. Stay at home moms are valued, just not monetarily.

By the way I've been a parent over 16 years, almost as old as you are, how long have you been a parent? You're 20, I'm unsure if you're a parent but unless you have or are one then you're statements are unfounded & those who do speak from experience do have validity whilst your 'opinion' is simply that, not founded on fact. Well enjoy, by the way stay at home moms are very valuable to society but not in a monetary generation capacity, but in a consumer capacity.

[TakeMaker]

The only criticism I've heard of stay at home parents has been from ignorant people who I can almost guarantee are not feminists. People who have never cared for a child in their lives and have no idea how hard it is being a stay at home parent. It's also really hard being a working parent, not everyone is lucky enough to be able to stay home and survive on one wage.

Gaining equality means gaining more choice, choice means you get to choose and that's the key part, not the choice itself but the option.

[Mesonfielde]

Being a stay at home mother is only a problem because it's an issue for the shared resource pool / wallet, as in she has no income of her own

Other than that sure whatever go ahead if you can afford it

Being a stay-at-home mom is a luxury.

[beebetree25]

I agree, but she has a degree and can work when needed

[jacquesvol]

@beebetree25 If she has a degree, not using it is a pity.

[beebetree25]

@jacquesvol who says she's not going to use it? I'm sure she will eventually.

[jacquesvol]

@beebetree25 Once she's used to the life of a stay at home mother it would take much to get her in the employee role IMHO.

[3336PS]

you can't never take back the time you bond with your child/children. there has to be some balance.
women need to have their career, ideally a job that can be flexible and return to when the children are really for school.

i have my career and i stayed home for a few years with my children. back to work. now that my husband left me. i am glad i have some money set aside and a career to fall back on.

we can't relay on one partner to be the only money maker or one partner to be the child care provider.
the best is when both partners can make enough money to hire a sitter.

i enjoyed being SHMom and a career woman.
what people think is not all that important, everyone has diff. situations and opionions. you have to do whats best for you and your family.

[DaniaMQ]

I honestly prefer being a stay-at-home wife/mother rather than a career woman. I would definitely work if I felt the need to do so. But if everything with my husbands' career was going great then I would much rather stay at home, clean the house and do those things and when I become a mother I would take care of my children and the house. Besides, I think the mother would take better care of her children if she's not always outside working. To spend more time with them.

[AriadneSky]

stay at hoe moms are not respected bc child care is not respected bc its not considered a male domain.

men who are stay at home dads are looked at as even lesser 'less ' than women. bc staying at home and working to keep a family healthy an strong is not respected bc its not considered a manly job.

This has NOTHING to do with feminism. Stay at home Moms were not respected before feminism. Thats why Men never did.

Men do sty home now.. Not as much as Women , but much more than before feminism.

The only political issue with Women staying at home is when its not their choice but a role they get stuck in by default bc the guy doesn't feel like it bc he's too 'important ' or can't be bothered or thinks its a girl thing, and / or bc there are not social programs to support working parents. In the united states anyhow.

Feminism has no problem with Moms taking care of kids. The problem is when her doing it is taken for granted.

[AriadneSky]

there s also a problem regardless of your sex that stay at home parents often become detached from society. they can become very isolated... which will keep them even more de politicized than the average citizen.

[AriadneSky]

I doubt the people shaming you wold _not_ shame a guy or making the same decision.. people who think through shame dont respect other people.

[myTake Owner]

"Feminism has no problem with Moms taking care of kids. The problem is when her doing it is taken for granted."

Oxymoron. Feminists degrade "traditionally female" jobs more than anyone.

[AriadneSky]

HOME*

hoe was not on purpose

[Laura_Marx]

"stay at hoe moms are not respected bc child care is not respected bc its not considered a male domain."

"Stay at home Moms were not respected before feminism."

YOOOOOOOOOOO

EXACTLY

[AriadneSky]

OP Im not saying i think Women should not stay home with kids or dads should not. im saying its not respected and not bc of feminism. no one got paid for raising kids despite the hards labour going into it. feminism didn't create that problem. its a problem in my opinion. I think As long as we live in a capitalist society where value is measured by money, and needs are only met with money traded for labour, Women / Men should be paid to take care of their kids bc it IS a contribution. I think Women should be paid for having kids in the first place. Women who have kids for other people get a full years salary.

[AriadneSky]

If Women did not have children society would not function. and its absurd someone else gets money for taking care of you're kids but you dont. if pregnancy was unavoidable and women dont get paid then women are enslaved. we have birth control but it doesn't always work. anyhow taking care of kids is work. should be paid regardless of whose kids bc without kids there's no society. its not like getting paid to take care of your car. we dont need cars we could have public transportation. we need kids.

And until there is the kind of EQUAL social support for child care, where its not like some kids go to fancy creative critical thinking pre schools where their kids expand like balloons, and others get dropped off pedophiles, then child birthing and raising should be compensated for. parents work is parents time kids suffer when this is not accounted for monetarily. The idea that there should not be money involved in something so sure as love for a child is crap bc thats not the world we

[AriadneSky]

live in. In this society it costs money to love your children in a way they can thrive. Women so get exploited that way bc they are expected to just want to care and nurture like martyred saints. Except if the parent has no compensation they can't function properly and the child suffers. Also raising kids seeing a parent who takes care of them not resected as a parent who is never there, seeing care and nurturing as somehow not PROVIDING. sends an incredibly warned message to children. Spending all of you're energy and emotional and mental efforts on the nurturing of a child is PROVIDING for them. it needs to be taken seriously. if people are paid its a job, and there are standards that must be met. psychological studies show people dont do well in work where there is little or no monetary compensation. this has been proven.

[AriadneSky]

I meant

#ASKER

is it op or asker.. people seem to say different things.

[Djaaaaaay]

@Laura_Marx your confused !!

[SovereignessofVamps]

sure... but I couldn't do it unless I worked still. part time at least or my own business. My kids need things for the future. And people usually do this because it's cheaper than daycare, not that I blame them. Daycare is unreal with how expensive it can be.

[Prilee1992]

Look at your grandpa grandma's marriage. Why the divorce rate was so low back then? because the man was in full charge of the family; and the woman fully submitted to him. This is how it works

Men, we're simple. We just want someone who cook nicely, washes our pants, when we come back home gives us hugs, kisses, and occasionally blowjob if you don't feel want to have sex. That's all! Be a good wife.

[idkwtftoputhere]

Or maybe it was because divorce was looked down upon back then? Divorce rate was definitely lower but there are quite possibly some lurking variables there that you aren't accounting for.

[lumos]

@idkwtftoputhere is correct, the divorce rates were low because it was frowned upon back then. Also because societies were less secular too, people took marriage a lot more seriously back then because more people were very religious.
The divorce rates spiked in the 80's and 90's, and has been going down since.
I also think it's pretty silly to assume that marriages were good just because the divorce rate was lower. Lots of people were suffering in their marriages but simply couldn't divorce because of the consequences they'd have to face.
"Why the divorce rate was so low back then? because the man was in full charge of the family"
Suuuure... because nothing bad has ever happened when a man was in charge? Give me a break lol.
You say you're simple and then have all these demands for what a woman should do. What do you do for her, exactly?

[Relentless_Hippie]

Don't listen to them, there's nothing wrong with what you've stated.

[Prilee1992]

@lumos I'm providing security; resources, money is the source. If a man doesn't provide resources, working to build civilization in primitive ages, the society has collapsed for a long time. Men are built to be stronger physically, more logical to solve problems that's we have been the ''source'' of the society. Now, the government is supporting women behind, with the rise of feminism, more men will go in their own way.

[Prilee1992]

@idkwtftoputhere you're right of one reason cheating was stigmatized back then, which means more sex compared to today's. Several studies also shown women working outside are double or triple times higher possibility to cheat than stay-at-home married mom.

Feminism has't happened back then, most women, not at all, were attracted to alpha males who keep attraction strong while improving sexual experience, compared to today's women being dominated by men and liking it has become…muddled, to say the least.

[Prilee1992]

high testosterone = more alphas = women were way more attracted to masculinity, less brainwashed by feminist society = less divorce rates = more happiness
The biology has proven that why women are built physically weaker, less logical, intelligent than males? Because it's used for them to fully submit to a man.

[idkwtftoputhere]

"Several studies also shown women working outside are double or triple times higher possibility to cheat than stay-at-home married mom."
Sources?
You're still making the assumption that lower divorce rates meant that people were happier in their marriages and using biology to back it up. Lol that's not how that works especially when I pointed out there are most likely other variables in play. Did you even read what I wrote? It's very likely if divorce wasn't so stigmatized back then, the divorce rate would be higher since societal pressure wouldn't be the result of keeping so many broken marriages together. Try and look underneath the surface of those statistics.
I also don't see the connection between women liking dominant men and less divorce rates. You're trying to make connections between variables that probably have very weak correlation - if at all any.

[ShaeNielson]

She is talking about caring for her children full time, not about being valued less than a dog.

[SovereignessofVamps]

No... it was because there was nowhere else for anyone to go. They had to stay married to survive. If they had split, who would've taken care of the kids? everyone would've known he cheated.

[Relentless_Hippie]

@SovereignessofVamps Or she cheated...

[SovereignessofVamps]

@Relentless_Hippie totally, but I meant how would he handle childcare or finding a new wife easily? For the woman she could just keep it secret, but a guy back then couldn't be alone with babies!

[Afrochick]

WASHES OUR PANTS LMAO

[Luci92]

Eh, women can be stay at home mums if they like, but personally, I have too much energy not to work, and I find it really rewarding. After watching my mum leave the work force to become a stay at home mum, I don't think I'd ever want to become like her either.

[beebetree25]

Its your life, dont listen to them. Its not like you have 12 kids, on welfare and watching reruns of golden girls day in and out...

You have a degree and can work when needed, plus you're only staying at home with her till she gets older which won't take long.

I hate how society comes at you with pitch forks and their judgments if you fall out side the norm..

If you still have you virginity at 25+
Still in school and at home 25+
Not engaged or have kids or still single at 30+

Its ridiculous. Not everybody can fit the mold society has. Sometimes its hard to find someone special, sometimes people dont want kids, sometimes people have mental issues and can't be left alone and are at home... but people never think of this.. thwy just judge, judge, judge.

Anywho keep on doing what you do OP.. you're fine.

[dipta]

I don't think there's anything wrong with being a stay at home parent, just as long as the family works, but as long as they don't look down on parents who don't. We all have our own reasons.

On a different note, it may sound strange when you say "I couldn't leave her because I love her too much". I mean, some people don't have a choice; it doesn't mean they love their children any less.
Do what's best for your child, but don't forget to live your life as well.

[lifeisbeautifulxoxo]

First of all no one can force a woman to do anything. That's illegal. If a woman decides to be a stay at home mother that's her decision. If she decides to be a career woman that's her decision.
Also, no one can choose someone else's happiness. Saying to a woman that she would be much happier being a stay at home mother is condescending.
I honestly don't mind if a woman wants to be a stay at home mother if she truly desires.
For myself, nothing is more important than career. I'm in a happy loving relationship with a man who also doesn't want children ever. That's our decision and we are happy with it.

[J1020]

I would like to make/have enough money to do some of my own projects with my future wife instead of us having different jobs or her having to stay home.
Traveling toguether and including her in some things instead of having two completely separate lifes.

[teatea111]

It's not that there's anything wrong with a woman fulfilling traditional gender roles and being a stay-at-home mom but more like if a woman feels pressured by her family or society to become one that there's a problem that needs to be addressed. I'm a feminist and I have no problem with women who choose to be stay-at-home moms on their own accord but if they became one because they felt an obligation to because of their gender then that's when I think it's unfair.

[Sophiaaaaaa]

What if your husband leaves you. Who will pay for you then? That's all I have to say. Girls should be encouraged to contribute to society, for the sake of their independence.

[AriadneSky]

taking care of kids IS contributing. if you're not caring for them someone else is. also basically someone else gets paid to care for your kids but you dot. then same problem with their kids. if we lived at a time whew pregnancy was inevitable AND women dont get paid for care taking then yes they are all slaves. having kids IS contribution one that should be paid. independence and motherhood should not be a conflict.

[3336PS]

@AriadneSky
agree with Sophia...
women should have some asset to fall back on when the guy leaves...

[jamiejean1021]

@AriadneSky She already says she has a degree, so she obviously has the ability to acquire a job if she ever needs to. Raising your children properly is a contribution to society that is massively overlooked. Sending them to daycare and public schools is allowing strangers to teach your children life fundamentals that you can't control. As a parent, you should be the most influential person in your childs life, not a tv show, day care provider, or public school teacher.

[redeyemindtricks]

@jamiejean1021 It isn't easy to just jump back into the workforce after YEARS of staying home.

You mentioned the degree -- but, ironically, the more technical the degree, the *harder* it would be to jump back into working after a long hiatus (since those are the fastest-evolving fields, where knowledge/skills become obsolete most quickly).
I mean... as an example, if I had a computer-science degree from 10+ years ago but hadn't actually WORKED in computer science since then, that degree would be pretty much irrelevant to today's computers. At that point the degree may as well be written on papyrus.

Lastly, the huge vast majority of stay-at-home parents (probably at least 999 out of every 1000) still send their kids to school with everyone else's kids.

[jamiejean1021]

@redeyemindtricks Not to be rude, but you are pulling those numbers out of your ass based off of what you view in your own life and community. I can do the same thing - I can look at the people I view in my own community and see that most women stay home and home school their children rather than opting to send them to public school.
Funnily enough the divorce rates in families that chose to have one partner stay home, tends to be lower as the stay-at-home partner has more time to dedicate to the family as a whole, and to their relationship.

[redeyemindtricks]

@jamiejean1021 You live somewhere where MOST people homeschool? Where is this?

Relatively few families can afford to have a SAH parent in the first place, so, that financial security accounts for the difference in divorce rates. (The rest of it is explained by the fact that SAH parents are more common in certain religious communities where divorce is much less frequent.)

[Love_Is_Eternal]

It's all part of the feminist agenda to discourage women from being married with chcildren.

[jamiejean1021]

@redeyemindtricks I live in a religious area.

[Anonymous]

Feminists don't fucking care. If you wanna be a stay at home mom, then do it. No one cares. Your personal life decisions don't impact anyone else besides you and your family. If you wanna work, then work. If you wanna stay at home and be a parent, then do that. Feminism isn't about working it's about choice. Those people who shamed you or pressured you just need to mind their own business.

[OPBinYYC]

There's a very 'me' centered comment. Do you speak for all feminists unanimously? Obviously you do, guess you should take Hillary Clinton's place and run for president as you think you know it all and speak for all. Feminism is not about choice or of equality, it's about equality plus (privilege & benefits for one gender over another). The writer is just trying to get some comfort in being or wanting to be a stay at home mother. Her actions do influence and impact others as if enough people act in the same manner then it will be socially acceptable and not shamed (for every action there is a result). I know perhaps you are trying to be nice or helpful but the tone of your comment is very aggressive & has a negative connotation. Perhaps you are just opinionated, expressive is ok but this seems to strike a cord with you.

[Opinion Owner]

@OPBinYYC I'm not being aggressive. That's just how I speak. I type how I speak and I curse, a lot. I don't see how my comment was me centered at all because I never mentioned myself or any first person pronouns at all. I'm not trying to be nice, helpful, or aggressive at all. All I intended to say was that majority of the people on this planet neither care nor are impacted by her personal life decisions, therefore she should just make whatever decisions in personal life that she feels as though are beneficial to her and her family. Perhaps you didn't understand me due to my choice of words before, since I was a bit less proper. I am a product of my culture and environment, and that impacts the way I speak.