Falling for a psychopath (No advice on how you can avoid it I am afraid. Just sharing my experience.)

My story is such a cliche one. I fell in love with a guy (Marc)who already had another girlfriend(Dina). Apparently Marc suspected that Dina was cheating on him so he felt free to date me. He told me he loved me and asked me to marry him. We got engaged and I introduced him to my friends and family. A month after this happened his girlfriend contacted me. I didn't wanna believe her so I asked Marc what she is talking about on Skype. He said he doesn't know any such person then hang up saying he has to call work.

After he hang up Marc called Dina. She refused to talk to him. So he sent her texts. She then sent me screenshots of these texts. First he denied that I ever existed. When she didn't buy that he told her that I was lying and had been stalking him. He would go on to tell her one ridiculous story after another until finally he ended up telling her that we are just talking. He reduced me to the level of an acquaintance. The part that hurt me most is that he denied I existed. That is the worst kind of betrayal in my culture, to deny that a person exists, that they breath and live.

She dumped him anyway. Then he asked me take him back. He bashed Dina, calling her a bitch, a slut and whore. Every word he said about her felt like a knife. I was thinking that he said these things to her about me too. I told him I would think about it. Please realize that this was my first time to love someone like this. I was so vulnerable.

Falling for a psychopath (No advice on how you can avoid it I am afraid. Just sharing my experience.)

The next day he called and said that he doesn't like himself and feels bad about the way he hurt me. He needed to do some thinking. I asked him if he loved me, if he wanted me. I told him I would forget everything if he said he wants me. He just kept talking about himself. I asked again but he just kept saying things like I don't wanna hurt you, I am not a bad guy.... That is when I realized that he didn't love me. All this time he had been using me as an ego boost because his girlfriend the one that he really liked was "cheating" on him.

It just broke my heart how duped I had been, how much of myself I had given to him. I started crying in the middle of the cafe. I put down a 50 on the table and left because I was so hurt. I put on sunglasses and walked home crying my heart out. Even now months later I cry when I least expect it.

I texted him that it is over. He then turned around and asked that I give him another chance. How I wanted to say yes! You have no idea how impossible it is to make your heart stop hoping. But I said no. I deleted every photo, conversation or address I had of him, closing every venue that he could reach me through. I don't use social media anymore because I fear one word from him, one gesture would pull me back.

I couldn't eat or sleep properly for a month. The only thing I could choke down was water and dry bread. For the first time in my life I cried over a man. Deep were the dregs of degradation I drunk over him. This happened in February. I still feel so raw. I have started dating other men but I have become so suspicious. I am scared to do the same thing he did to me to others so I only have sexual relationships with them. It is so painful. Don't give yourself to someone so completely like I did. Hold yourself in reserve. This ache isn't worth anything.

Falling for a psychopath (No advice on how you can avoid it I am afraid. Just sharing my experience.)
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Most Helpful Guy

  • ArchDruidMordred

    I kinda know what it's like, being pulled in by someone only to find out they don't give a damn about you in the slightest. But it was no where near the extent as you. I've since cut most of those girls off. I only talk to one of them now, even though I know I probably shouldn't. I'm not really obsessed with her anymore but every now and then I still wonder what things would be like if things were different.

    But for my information, and sorry if this is an annoying question, what made you so attracted to him in the first place?

    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      He was so good to me. We had similar interests and very long conversations. He made me feel calm and at peace with the world. We laughed so much and I never felt lonely while we were together. He understood me completely. I saw him as myself.

Most Helpful Girl

  • VampireEmpress

    wow. I'm curious though: so he was more manipulative with the emotional stuff than the sexual side? lots of people say you can protect yourself by waiting to have sex, but you're also saying to wait emotionally too?

    but don't worry karma is a bitch. so he'll pay for what he did eventually.

    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      Yes he was. You should wait to see people's true colors. Always trust your instincts. Some people are just evil.

What Girls & Guys Said

  • Keyspirits

    Guys will do anything to get in yo panties regardless 👌🏼

    • Anonymous

      Really? Would you ever put a ring on a girl's finger to have sex with her? We had only been together for a year. I was 24. Getting married wasn't part of my life plans for the next three years at least. I was having sex with him. He just put so many hopes and dreams in my mind, making empty promises. I never prompted him to do any of those things. He is a psychopath. I really hope you aren't like him.

    • Keyspirits

      Men will do anything and everything if they really wanna score on u. They will kum up with every tricks and every way possible up their sleeve to get a taste of u at the very end. That is sum or most guys motive nowadays anywayz so its not surprising to figure that out. Promises are meant to be broken so wake up to ur call. Its 2015 and a new age! Do u know why lion have so many lionesses in a pride? Thats perrty much the behavior of a all male living creatures 👌🏼

    • Anonymous

      Hmmm. So you are saying lying unnecessarily, breaking people's heart and not acting with honor is the new thing? smh. What a dark ugly world. I am still choosing honesty though. Better to live with integrity and be sad than lie every time.

    • Show All
  • MysteriousFlower

    I can only wish you the best and there will be a much nicer guy for you.

  • BackInGame

    women in their raw form - primal attraction and pure instict of submission to psychos and bad boys

    • SIGguy

      My dad's still under his wife's spell, and she's nuttier than squirrel shit (Borderline Personality Disorder). It's not a gender thing, it's a low self esteem thing.

  • ShayanMortazavi

    Wow, that's horrible

  • Anonymous

    Sorry to hear your story :( There are some real evil people out there. My ex who duped me into thinking she was my soulmate, dumped me after stealing several hundred dollars from me, cut off all communication (so I couldn't get the money back), and later I found out she was on Tinder banging different guys for more than a year before she dumped me, for one of the guys she cheated on me with! That was roughly a year ago and I still have not recovered :(

    • Anonymous

      smh. I wonder how they can do such things to others. Humans are very precious. Do you think we will ever be the same? I mean be as trusting as we were before them.

    • Anonymous

      Not only do they not think about it, I think they actually get some kind of "rush" out of it. They take pleasure in knowing that we are suffering. That they somehow deceived us. Ironically at time they make me want to die, when deep down I know they are the ones who deserve to.

    • Anonymous

      I think that might be true. My ex is certainly living up to it. He is always trying to contact me. He talks to my friends. I have had to move to avoid him completely. ugh.