Do men take longer to miss their ex after a break up than women?

My guy friends tell me that directly after a break up a guy tries to ignore his pain and pretend like he is fine and after about two weeks they start noticing the contrast of her not being there anymore, and at the month-2 month point he will realize that the girl is really not going to contact him and will start to recognize that he misses her and will reach out. I struggle with grasping this because I am a female and was miserable for the first week, and sad/accepting it this week. He and I were best friends and he didn't want to break up but he was also afraid of what I symbolized to him. He always said i was the girl he would marry but that he wasn't ready for that and even though i said i wasn't either, he was still afraid that being with me meant commitment. He also watched his parents have a terrible marriage and equally terrible divorce. We talked every single day for two years even when he lived in another country for 9 months of that and another stated for 2 months. Even when we broke up, everything was great. He had told me he loved me for the first time in the whole two years, two weeks prior to our break up. I truly believe that it isn't me but rather the seriousness that I represent to him that caused our break. He told me that and so did his mom and sister. Anyways, the point is, I miss my best friend, its been 12 days since we last spoke. Do you think he will try to contact me and if so, when? And will he/does he miss me?


Most Helpful Guys

  • That's hard to say exactly what he's thinking. I would say move on with your life and focus on positives for now. You don't have any control over this situation, however, you do have control of yourself. My guess is he will contact you again. I can tell you that I'm sure he does miss you as well. But please don't over-think this and keep your focus on yourself and stay occupied to keep yourself off this particular thought for now. Nothing is set in stone. I hope this helps your situation. This is how I respond in those situations and it's made a significant difference in my happiness.

  • He might be missing you. Who was the one to break it off by the way?
    It better not to guess and just make the move yourself. Don't ask him out, but try to talk or communicate w/ him in some way.

    • I broke up with him and he didn't want to although he wasn't willing to compromise. I told him that although I wasn't angry with him that I was blocking all contact outlets until things had settled down to give us both space. I want to move on and I intend to but it's killing me to think he doesn't miss me after two years of being each other's priority and go to. We hadn't even been fighting when we broke up and in fact things were the best they had ever been but we couldn't come to a solution on one issue and I had to stand up for my needs. I just can't stand the thought that's he's totally fine with me being gone.

    • ... oh boy. He will most likely not make the move. D: I don't really know exactly what he might be thinking, but going off of my own experience and some of my guy friends, if we attempted to save the relationship while it was ending, and you said no to it, we assume that if we keep at it, it will only irritate you. So, he tried to save it at first, he didn't try to save it later, and his feelings will only get weaker.. ):
      You definitely have to be the one to do something.
      Also, from my own experience (he might be different) but I got pretty angry when the girl came back and tried to dismiss what has happened earlier as if her new plan is better (she did it 3 times before I ended it).
      May I ask you what the issue was?
      Wish you the best.

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