I am 21 years old and have been seeing my girlfriend since we were both 15. For over 2 years now I have worked on the rigs and supported her and everything we need as a couple to be happy. I work a week on, week off schedule on the rigs to support our nice house, vehicles and daily lives. I recently took her to look at wedding rings, and had a time and place set up to ask her. Our anniversary was right around the time too.
I got a bad feeling and went through her Verizon text and call logs. When I confronted her on it she lied over and over and over for a week. I finally got the truth out and began to forgive her. I decided a month later to call the guy and get more info. Long story short, she did sleep with him at his house. I finally got it out of her but it took over a month and she didn't tell me, I found out :( Now main problem why I'm not gone already. We own a 250k house, and 3 expensive vehicles.
If I leave I will struggle to pay all bills and have to get rid of all my animals and things at home that I can't take care of with my schedule. I did get it out of her that he lasted a whopping 4 minutes and then she cried and felt bad. Don't matter, still cheating! Anyway, what should I do? I love this woman to death, everything I know, have and grown up to will be gone. She feels horrible but I don't know if every day of my life I can be unhappy and worry. With my job I have to have a little trust there, ya know?
On our ann. she text him more than me, that hurts to think about.I also feel that if I stay with her, it will show her that its OK to do, because I will forgive her again. But I love her to death and really did want to marry her and have a kid with her. We recently had a miscarriage that upset us both and then that's when this all started happening.
I do feel like we can work things out, but I don't know if sex, love, trust, etc will ever be there again. Please... Please any info will be awesome! Thanks
Most Helpful Girl
As an outsider looking in, I think she takes you for granted as well as the relationship. It doesn't seem like she loves you as much as you love her. Look at all of the sacrifices you are making for this woman and it's so evident you love her to death. She is lying and cheating on you and covering it up. When you love someone and want to make a life time commitment to him/her, other people don't even come into the equation. It's just the two of you building upon a life together.
I understand that this is very difficult for you given the situation, emotions etc. Perhaps, you need to explore couple's therapy to see if you can work through these issues. I think this needs to be considered before you even consider a marriage. You know you love her and you want to forgive her, but you also cannot keep making excuses for her. If she is as serious about making this work as you are then do the counseling.
If this isn't an option then you will have to do your best to start fresh minus her. If there is no sex, love and most of all trust then you have no relationship. Try to get roommates to move into your home so you can keep it. Sell one or two of your vehicles so you can either pay them off or get your money back. Most of all, don't sell your soul for love. You sound like a very loving, diligent man with a lot to offer. Don't settle for anyone, you deserve to be loved and not taken for granted. There is someone who will appreciate you, be loyal and thank God everyday to be in your life.
Best of luck.1