Husband tried to kill himself after he found out I cheated. help please?

[Anonymous]

i cheated on my husband only once. and i hated my self for so long. i betrayed him and i betrayed our two children. after i cheated i grew very possesive and jealous of my husband. i kept saying that he was cheating on me and i blamed him for random things. i just felt that because i cheated on him. that he was going to cheat on me. i love my husband with all my heart and soul and will never cheat on him again. he gave me all his love and trust and i threw it all away. a week ago he found out that i cheated because the other guy came to our house and was looking for me. my husband went crazy and beat the other guy to the point blood was all over the place. the the other man left. me and my husband had a fight and i just kept putting the blame on him. he called me a whore. then our kids came out to calm us down. our son is fifteen and our girl is seventeen. my husband just broke down and started crying. i never seen him cry before and it tore me apart knowing i was the one who hurt him. i tried to say that i was sorry but he just went into our room and got his gun. he put it to his head and tried to kill himself. luckily me and our kids were able to get the gun away from him and called the police. now he is on suicide watch. now my kids hate me and my husband just sits there and stares at the wall. he doesn't cry or talk or anything. he shows no emotion. like he is in a coma or something. how do i get him and our kids to love and trust me again? please help.

[Anonymous]

first of all everybody STOP about this age thing. she might've chosen WRONG age here! it can happen! she didn't mention about her real age in this question after all. and stop mentionin she's trollin, since u've got NO evidence about it. her situation might be real... show some empathy please ;)

anyway... about yer question.
first of all i'm glad u realise u were wrong. after all everybody deserves a 2nd chance to make-up for his mistakes.

"after i cheated i grew very possesive and jealous of my husband. i kept saying that he was cheating on me and i blamed him for random things. i just felt that because i cheated on him. that he was going to cheat on me"

^cannot blame u... many people would be afraid dat their husband/wife will "return da favor" after they cheated on him/her.

"a week ago he found out that i cheated because the other guy came to our house and was looking for me. my husband went crazy and beat the other guy to the point blood was all over the place. the the other man left."

^i'm so sorry about wot happened... i can understand he felt outraged after he found out he's been cheated... but this was too much :/

"i tried to say that i was sorry but he just went into our room and got his gun. he put it to his head and tried to kill himself. luckily me and our kids were able to get the gun away from him and called the police. now he is on suicide watch"

^as i said above he was feelin really out of control... people can react like this when they r out-of-control... it's so sad indeed if it happens.

"now my kids hate me and my husband just sits there and stares at the wall. he doesn't cry or talk or anything. he shows no emotion. like he is in a coma or something. how do i get him and our kids to love and trust me again? please help."

^hope after some time has passed... maybe u'll get back together again wid him and yer kids. but it needs lots of time to make this possible. at least i'm glad he's saved from possible suicide. wot can u do now's be there for yer kids... and try to convince 'em u'll never do da same mistake again and be always there for 'em!

wish i could help u further... :(

[Asker]

thanks for the advice, really. and thanks for not thinking I'm a troll or whatever. I'm 37. I made a fake profile because I didn't want people I know to read this if they're on this site. But I've decided to let my husband to get a divorce. I'm going to take our kids to a family therapist so I can at least try to save my relationship with my children. My husband deserves a lot better than me and would be happier if he found someone else. even if it hurts to seem him with another woman. I know he will never love me again but I hope he'll forgive me one day at least.

[Opinion Owner]

np u r welcome :)
it's really asshole-ish when people judge before thinkin first. when someone picks some age here... doesn't mean it's his/her real age... that's y i got really offended. :(

"My husband deserves a lot better than me and would be happier if he found someone else. even if it hurts to seem him with another woman. I know he will never love me again but I hope he'll forgive me one day at least."

^but if he changes his mind and wants to get back to u... will u accept or still nope?

[Asker]

of coarse I'll say yes! and I would dedicate my life into showing him just how much I love and want him. I'll stay by his side at all times so he'll know that I will never hurt him again and will take care of him for the rest of our lives. I'm still deeply in love with my husband.

[Opinion Owner]

nice to know :)

hope i was helpful :)

[schnipdip]

That's what you should have been doing before hand... Idiot...

[Zthander]

IF YOU KNOW YOUR HUSBAND DESERVE BATTER THEN YOU SO KILL YOURSELF BECAUSE IF YOU ALIVE SO YOUR HUSBAND ALWAYS FEEL PAIN SO KILL YOURSELF

[detlef]

Let me answer in a way which doesn't assume this post is real.

This is why cheating is dangerous and why you never, ever confess to it, or cheat with someone who would actually show up at your house, Fatal Attraction-style.

Cheating is a dealbreaker. Are there couples who get through it? No, I don't think so, not really. Bill and Hillary are still together but theirs is not a true marriage in any sense of which I'm aware. Kids are different and can come to understand, over time, why someone would cheat in a failed/failing marriage.

If you're real, best advice is to get professional counseling, and to think seriously about exactly why you cheated, and what good it would do to stay married to this man.

[Asker]

The problem wasn't my husband. It was me and yes I want to stay with the man I love. We were going through a hard time and this man told me I should tell him what's wrong. Looking back my husband warned me that this is what men do. The other man listened to my problems and then he took advantage of me. I know its all my fault. I felt stressed and wanted to escape.

[schnipdip]

@asker...
No offense... But you should probably die... You'd be worth more to your family. With insurance and everything...
YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SAY "I STILL WANT TO BE WITH HIM". NOOOONE!!!

[detlef]

Well that was intense.

Damn this question got popular again all of a sudden after 51 days.

[tenchu11]

@schnipdip you need to chill. She will get her family back eventually. Well her children at least, it will be an uneasy time but if they love her they will forgive her (not including her husband... that's pretty much over).

[schnipdip]

@tenchu11 you think so? I'd hate her if I was her kids. She's the reason for their broken family now. And yes, she does deserve to die. Not only did she emotionally hurt her husband forever she also physically hurt him... Same with her kids.
She doesn't deserve a family. She doesn't deserve life.

[VDAFISH123]

How exactly did you cheat on him?

[stellaann]

After 1.5 year relationship with my boyfriend, he changed suddenly and stopped contacting me regularly, he would come up with excuses of not seeing me all the time. He stopped answering my calls and my sms and he stopped seeing me regularly. I then started catching him with different girls several times but every time he would say that he love me and that he needed some time to think about our relationship. But cannot stop thinking about him so i decided to go online and i saw so many good talk about this spell caster and i contact him and explain my problems to him. He cast a love spell for me which i use and after 2 day, my boyfriend came back to me and started contacting me regularly and we moved in together after a few months and he was more open to me than before and he started spending more time with me than his friends. We eventually got married and we now have been married happily for 3 years with a son. Ever since Dr. enato of ugbefelovespell@gmail. com

[GirlsLie]

Why don't you two and your children, go get some professional help, instead of coming on this site. The emotional trauma that you've both caused your children after this is very selfish also and the least you can do, is get them some help. A lot of places offer low cost or even free counselling, that's something you should really look into.

[Asker]

I've decided to just let them go. my husband finally spoke to me and wanted a divorce so thats what I'm giving him. I just hope that someday my children will forgive me and want me in their lives still. and I really hope that my husband forgives me even if he still hates me.

[GirlsLie]

Well cheating really changes everything and I still you two should still get your children into counselling, my mom tried to kill herself in front of me, multiple times as a teenager and it's a difficult thing for teenagers to comprehend. It could also help repair your relationship with them, they still need their mother, regardless of you cheating or not.

[Asker]

I'll try and see if they will come with me. I think I should wait for awhile though. all of our wounds are still to new.

[GirlsLie]

Well I hope things work out and get better for all of you.

[Asker]

I just hope they're happy. I don't deserve any type of good in my life anymore. thanks though.

[Dave20152]

Everyone deserves good in their life, you just have to make good decisions for that to happen, you made a bad one and are now paying for it

[GirlsLie]

I hope they're all doing ok now, what a horrible position for all of them to be in honestly.

[schnipdip]

@Dave20152 no she doesn't... She deserves hell.

[GirlsLie]

I'm sorry but cheating doesn't warrant suicide or putting your children through watching their dad attempt suicide. Cheating is horrible but you shouldn't be held responsible for someone elses emotional stability or lack there of.

[VDAFISH123]

Since she is married to this man, she should be faithful, caring and loyal to him, she shouldn't be acting like it's not her problem because it's also her problem and her responsibility to be there for him no matter what. The husband could be going through other things that the wife would not understand.

[VDAFISH123]

If he did commit suicide she should be held responsible because it is her fault for betraying him and she should acknowledge and pay for what she did. Look your not a bad person but you should be ashamed and guilty of what you did to that poor guy.
Even if you divorce, it does not exactly mean that you can't love him. If you really do love him, you would be there for him as a faithful and grateful person and never let him go

[VDAFISH123]

Although he wanted a Divorce, did you want the divorce and do you still see your lover?

[kaskas19]

Shouldn't have cheatedbin the first place. I know if my dad cheated, as loyal as I am to him, I would forever lose any amount of respect I had for him.

[lanternhill]

Um. Your profile says 18-24 yet supposedly you have 2 teenage kids. I call troll.
If not - you need major marriage counseling, not GAG.

[Michael_Rc46]

Anyone could put a false age

[Asker]

I'm 37. I made a fake profile because I don't want to be shamed even more in case people I know read this site. and I've decided to let my husband have the divorce. he'll be happier without me and there is no way I can make up for the pain that I've put him through.

[lanternhill]

I apologize - I've seen too many fake trolling attempts so I don't take these seriously if I find glaring errors like that.

I don't have enough experience to answer your question. I was trying to play troll police.

[Asker]

that's alright, I get it. your right though. we do need counseling. just not marriage. but for our kids.

[lanternhill]

Yes - get them counseling. Parents' relationship can have a profound effect on kids' later on (God forbid).

[Pummel]

Do you have a relationship with the God of Abraham through His Son Christ? If so you know what you have to do..
If not than may I suggest starting to read his holy word the kjv bible. I thought I was a follower of Christ (I was raised in the Roman Catholic church, which is the synagogue of Satan) when in actuality I had no idea what it meant to be a Christian who followed the Christ of Scripture, because the Roman Catholic church teaches the doctrines of devils and teach traditions of men. (I am talking about the institution of the Roman Catholic church and not the people in the pew).
I was a front man for an early 2000's hardcore band and I have disgraced myself, my family and most of all I have sinned against heaven.. The last woman I was in love with, well we had got pregnant and I wanted to have the child and marry her but I was extremely selfish, I told her I would never quit the music business... Oh father in heaven give me strength I drove her away..
She had an abortion (which even though I did not agree I went with her and had flowers on her nightstand when I took her home. I spooned behind her and stroked her hair and scratched her back. She cried and when I went downstairs to get her something to drink I fell to my knees crying. I was told NOT TO CRY IN FRONT OF HER..

I don't think that was correct information... Anyway after I made her dinner and brought it up on at tray I said... I can't believe or forgive myself to this day... "I HAVE TO GO TO BAND REHEARSAL"..
Two months later she went to visit some friends and never came back... I was also abused from the 4th grade to the 8th grade and along with the physical abuse they told me that no one will ever want me... EVER..

My point being that the God of Abraham is changing my character to resemble HIS son's...

[RexCatholicissimus]

I'm gonna be really methodical answering your question and just say that if you're being genuine? This really isn't something you should be asking a bunch of strangers on GaG who have a 2500 character limit to work with. This is a serious interpersonal problem that you need to work out with some kind of professional, NOT a bunch of teenagers and 20 somethings who admittedly, don't have the best perspective on the subject (I certainly know I don't).

Hopefully you can sort this out either way, though. What you did was unforgivable, but at least you realise it and I hope you and him can get past it.

[detlef]

Good answer.

[lanternhill]

She's "18-24" yet "has 2 teenagers." I call troll.

[SaintRichie23]

Yes... you are a terrible, terrible person. "How do I get him and our kids to love and trust me again?" You don't. They may forgive, but they'll never forget. You can't retake a test you were caught cheating on. It's a 0, end of story.

s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...794460c87b.gif

[CottonMuffin]

I really don't get the whole : ''I cheated on my significant other, but I still love him eventhough I hurt him in a horrible way'' ; w ;

[Anonymous]

I recently went through this myself. Firstly, know that your children still love you, they're just going through some serious stuff right now. Give them the time they need to process and deal with it in whatever way they may need.

When it comes to your husband, well, I'd say keeping your distance from him is the best course of action for the immediate future, seeing you may not be helpful. Understand that you are not responsible for his actions, and that he needs psychiatric help. However, he has to choose to get that help himself.

I know that for a while, you and your family's lives are going to be tumultuous, hang in there. You have my sympathies.

[dogbert444]

Sympathies for being unfaithful? WTF?

[Asker]

I don't deserve any type of sympathy. My husband finally talked to me and asked for a divorce. if it'll make him happy then that's what I'll do.

[Opinion Owner]

@dogbert444, I don't feel the need to place judgement on a person I don't know, nor form opinions on circumstances I don't know about. All I see is someone who needs some kind words and helpful advice, which I'm more than happy to provide.

@Asker I understand you're feeling guilty, but you and your family have my sympathies regardless. I know all too well how destructive a divorce and suicide attempts can be. So you all will be in my thoughts. It's probably for the best you and your husband divorce, I just hope you both end up in a better place once this ugliness has passed.

[Asker]

thank you.

[dogbert444]

You knew full well what you were doing. You took the biggest gamble of your life and lost. Lost big time!! I think you have blown it completely. If it were me in his shoes, I'd leave you without a word of explanation, and NO going back, ever. You have also lost the love and respect of your children!!

I think you deserve everything you get!! What you have done is UNFORGIVEABLE!!

[Asker]

I know. that's why I've decided to let my husband divorce me. I don't deserve a man as good as him. I just hope he can forgive me at some point. even if it means he'll never love me again.

[dogbert444]

I am sorry it's come to this. When will girls and guys learn not to gamble their entire future on one number. The truth will always catch up with you!! I'm sorry to say that some guys, like me, put so much faith in their SO's, and can never forgive unfaithfulness.

[jacquesvol]

@dogbert444

Please remember that both sexes cheat in equal proportions.
Thanks :)

[dogbert444]

I mentioned that above! I asked when girls and guys will learn not to gamble theur future lives!

[Rian45R45665]

HOW I GOT MY EX HUSBAND BACK WITH THE HELP OF REAL AND EFFECTIVE SPELL FROM DR Osasu My This wonderful cast called Dr Osasu help me return my husband back after he abandoned me and the kids for 2 years without visiting. A friend of mine told me how the powerful spell caster helped her and i contacted him via the email address my friend gave me, i told him my problem and he assured me victory, in less than 48 hours after i did all he instructed me to do, he called me for the first time after he left me, he pleaded for my forgiveness now we are living happily. if you need his help you can reach him on his personal email (drosasu25@gmail. com) or call him [phone]

[cavmanier]

It sounds like he really valued the bond you two had and when you cheated you disrespected that bond in probably the worst possible. I'm really curious why you cheated.

"how do i get him and our kids to love and trust me again? please help" I would stop blaming him for why you did that and be earnest with him. I hope this doesn't happen to me by someone I extremely care about... I would leave you. I really think you deserve prison time. It's disgusting.

[mukheef]

... Aha... You're 24, and your daughter is 17... Okay. Ya sure why not. And I'm 28 and my son is 32. Because fuck it.

Some one please report this post.

[Klaatu51]

please everybody stop.. she might've picked wrong age!! mistakes like dat can happen. she never mentioned her age in her post... so please don't judge her beforehand :)

[Anonymous]

You do not "love" someone if you cheat on them... First off, you need to acknowledge you are now scum... Worse than garbage.

Secondly you are even worse then scum for blaming him for your actions...

Thirdly, quit making fucking excuses. It's pathetic. You're pathetic... Accept it.

Offer him the option of Anullment or Devorce AND YOU WILL NOT TAKE A SINGLE DOLLAR OF HIS.

[Anonymous]

I can't believe what I just read. You cheated on him then red to put the blame on him? This is the shittiest thing I've ever read in my life. You are a bitch. Damn. The answer is you can't. No one would ever trust someone after that. Don't even try. Leave. Damn that's just bitchy

[lanternhill]

She's "18-24" yet "has 2 teenagers." I call troll.

[Venussmith23]

i was trying to access my boyfriend phone but he caught me trying to do it, he change his password and all, but i got in touch with elitecracker12 on Gmail, they help to get access to his phone without any trace, my boyfriend is a cheater but i caught him. Thanks to the Ethical professional spy investigator.

[MelbaB]

Your son is 15 and your daughter is 17 but yet you're between the ages of 18-24? Ummm

[lanternhill]

Exactly.

[TyraMayes]

This goes to show don't believe everything you see there is such thing as putting a false age

[Klaatu51]

@TyraMayes finally someone who realised it might be wrong age... so please everybody stop :)

[Bandit74]

this story is false
the wife never cheats, it's always the husband

nice try troll 😜

[dogbert444]

Don't believe this for one second!!

[jacquesvol]

I've seen a similar situation among friends, suicide attempt by the husband included. That makes me believe it's possibly true.

[dogbert444]

I meant I don't believe it's always the husband that cheats. 50:50 I reckon!

[Slartybartfast]

What? Wow, I've known several men who's wives have cheated on them. My first girlfriend cheated on me.

My best friends wife cheated, He was left with three children (two were hers from a previous relationship, they all stayed with him)

Women cheat MORE than men do. They are simply better at it and it's much easier for them obviously.

To say that is to kick a man when he's already down, possibly suicidal, Shame on you!!

[sexyphil]

You don't need GaG you need to get professional help for this situation... and fast

[MyExperience]

You got married way too young but now that that is done, you all need serious professional therapy nothing a site like this will solve. good luck to you all

[Anonymous]

Maybe because you are a whore. Did you even apologize? Why did you cheat on him again? And why did you mentally abuse him and not even apologize? You did not even show that you are sorry
Clearly you do not care about him

[Opinion Owner]

To all the men on this website, I would like to apologize for doubting that cheating women were the reason why marriage ended in divorce. And I hope that women like this do not keep you men from finding a good woman who has a good heart

[tenchu11]

If it was a long time ago why did the guy go looking for you? At your house? Did he know you were married?

[TripleAce]

So your cheating ad also getting caught while your with a man who's suicidal

Hummm

[hotstuffSRD]

That's really bad !!!
All I can say is that just love them all it will take time but they will start trust in you again by the way what have you done?

[Asker]

For the past week I've spent all my time sitting next to my husband. I keep telling him that I'm sorry and how much I love him and want him and that the other guy meant nothing and that it was only one time. He hasn't said a word. Our kids are staying at his parents for now and come to visit him after school. Except his mom and dad make me leave the room when they come to visit him. I have no idea what I'm going to do.

[hotstuffSRD]

Don't worry just try to convince them... love them and never do this again😊
Wishes for your future 😊

[schnipdip]

Um no. "This was a only one time thing"... WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU? YOU GET WORSE AND WORSE THE MORE I READ WHAT YOU SAY!

[VDAFISH123]

Look u should try reconcile an but try to get your husband back if that is possible

[PublicEnemyNumber-1]

Sounds like you messed up your life. Guess what? It's your fault. It's all your fault. Now you have to deal with the consequences. However, I applaud you for almost making someone suicide.