Have you ever regretted breaking someone's heart?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I've never intentionally planned on breaking anyone's heart. If I did ever hurt anyone's feelings, it was from being honest with mine or from being hurt by them in the first place which made me react irrationally and explode my feelings from suppressing the load they put on me. I always try my best to explain myself rationally, but if the other person isn't hearing me out and can't read between the line/is being irrational with me, I have just dropped everything and distanced myself as well as have once lashed my feelings by doing dumb actions.

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    • This was probably one of the most mature answers 😐

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    • Thank you for sharing your experiences, I really appreciate it

    • Out of the 100 females that gave an opinion, thanks for selecting mine as MHO πŸ™‚ Happy to have reflected and share my experiences. Was pretty interesting to read through others too.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Yeah. A girl I had a brief fling with in college. I don't know if I 'really' broke her heart, or if I just made her despair over her assumed lack of prospects.

    She was really hot, but I can see a lot of men actually disagreeing with me on that, and instead thinking the opposite was true. Again, I thought she was hot, it's just the rest of the world might not have. Anyway, she could have been a little insecure since she spent about half her life around these 'other men.'

    Anyway, I fucked her. OMG she was amazing. She had one minor quirk in which she claimed not to really enjoy sex - she just wanted a lot of it. I saw it as a challenge, but on some level I was intimidated. If I had the slightest bit of foresight at the time, I would have acknowledged what gift that would be - and it could be a gift to me. But no, I let it fester and found myself getting easily frustrated by any minor annoyance of hers that I could pick up on. In the end, we were chatting over AIM (basically the 00's version of "texting") and she asked me if I still wanted to have sex with her. I fear I may have set her on the path to deducing that, yes, the entire world is full of these 'other men' who don't think she's hot, and which I failed to be a counterexample.

    This isn't quite heart-break, though. And I honestly can't say any of it's true. It could be I'm not as special as I think, and I'm far from the only one who finds her ridiculously sexy. If that's the case, chances are she actually fell for me. I would actually prefer this over the former, because she needs to made to believe in how hot she is. A body like that shouldn't have an insecure bone in it (unless it's arthritic - not that that's a deal breaker, just.. you know..). Heartbreak is easy to get over. Mental trauma, less so.

    But, I guess if my 'regret' is conditional, then it's not really regret. Like, they say 'unconditional love,' but that's a redundancy. If it's conditional love, it's not really love. Likewise, conditional regret is not really regret. True, my condition isn't a 'yes/no' regret, more a 'yes/absolutely,' regret, so maybe it's the threshold that counts. But that only means I'm capable of feeling more regret than I currently am, but aren't. If I'm not feeling it fully, am I really feeling it? Do we just name emotion by their principle components, and disregard magnitude? That would be a spectrum instead of a combination. But, I guess we only have so many words. Makes it easier to name them all..

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    • i remember AIM, but you did the best you could to set her in that path on how you see her through your eyes. Some women have a hard time getting over those insecurities, you did the best you could

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 100

  • I do regret breaking a few hearts. Unfortunately, that's life. It's not something I've ever set out to do and I've hated doing it each time its happened. I know what it's like to have my heart broken, and I don't wish it on anyone.
    Well, maybe just the really bad people. Sorry. πŸ˜•
    In the long run it's for the best. Im not going to say it doesn't sucks that it happens that way but in the end it seems to work out.
    I believe you learn something after each failed relationship and each broken heart.
    Eventually those lessons will lead you to the person that would rather break their own heart before yours.

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    • That's what I would rather do, break my own heart before I hurt them. You're right though, you do always learn something

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    • I couldn't have said it better myself, so I'm not going to try. haha

    • @Big_Biker_Daddy Haha! Good call, I've got this. πŸ˜‰

  • Yes, because I hate to be the cause of another person's pain.

    It's inevitable at times though. It's kinder to end a relationship that's not right for you , coz living a lie by pretending you still want to be with someone will hurt them more in the long- term. Lying not only hurts , but it destroys a persons trust in other people

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  • Absolutely. The boyfriend before my husband, I just didn't feel it with him after a few years and wanted out of the relationship but I was gutless and a coward and took way too long to end the relationship because I didn't want to hurt him (or look like a bad person).

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    • Dragging it out... you must've felt really bad

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    • You gave comments and answered what I needed. That's what you did

    • Oh well I'm glad for that then 😊

  • Absolutely, I'm actually dealing with this right now. I know I'm breaking his heart, but I'm also breaking my own. I truly do regret it all but at the same time you can't just sit around waiting forever, I'm taking life as it comes and right now this is something I need to do.

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    • May I ask why this is happening?

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    • We will be around 5 hours away from each other in TN.

    • Not going to lie... but that's not a huge distance,. You can definitely make it work

  • No, because i've only left in two situstions:

    1. The guy not treating me well or not looking for the same thing as me.
    2. In an early stage in dating when I've found out I didn't have the same feelings. Ended it respectfull and with dignity and kept in touch until the guy is over it and moves on (but not giving any hope on dating, just answering unanswered questions and stuff like that).

    It's not fun but I think it creates a "different kind of broken heart".

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  • I have not and would not choose to. Or it may lead to that question you just asked.

    Why are you going through it?

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    • I did a long time ago but I made peace with the woman I hurt. Just felt like something that needed to be ask. That's good you never did though.

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    • That is the right step to take, not a lot would, but that is courage, very good thing

    • I appreciate that

  • No. If I "broke" his heart... he deserved it.

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  • Not really, no. It's not something that I do lightly and it has always been for the best. I don't have an ex that I would want to get back together with. They were all good learning experiences but they were ultimately not right.

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  • As far as relationships are concerned I've never regretted rejecting people I was not interested in. Even those I rejected quiet harshly because they could understand all the previous times I calmly said "no".

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  • I, for one, have never been "in love"... I'm not the type to fall easily lol. But I'm not sure if I've ever broken someone's heart. I did have a friend who kinda obsessed over me & I turned him down. I don't regret it, but I do feel guilty about it..

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    • Why? Since he was obsessing over you, why feel guilty?

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    • Whatever floats that girl's boat I guess πŸ˜‚ I wish him well!

  • I feel it now and I hate myself for it and once I forgive and move on I'll still remember this mistake for ever in my dumb life.

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  • Yes I didn't want to break his heart but things got really complicated and I feel so bad but we sorted it out but never wanted to hurt him 😬

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  • Twice. They confessed love but I felt nothing more than friends. They were crushed but it's not fair to lie to them.

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  • it hurts to hurt someone, but i had to break up w him if i wanted to keep the trust. heartbreak is always better than getting played

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  • No regrets, I never intentionally broke someone's heart so I'm good with the past

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  • Yes but it wasn't intentional. I didn't get involved with them or anything but they grew obsessed with me with unrealistic expectations and when it didn't happen, grew bitter.

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  • I have felt really bad about it but regretted it, no. Breaking someone heart is better than leading them on

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  • No, I cannot control their feelings and I prefer to be honest about my feelings than giving them fake hope.

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  • Never broken someones heart as far as Im aware *shrugs*

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  • I had to tell a lot of guys that I wasn't interested in them and I just wanted to be friends. I don't regret it but it was hard to do.

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  • Of course I've never wanted to hurt anyone I once loved, however I've learned I need to put my own needs first and foremost and it's hard for me to feel guilty for doing what's best for me.

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  • Yes, I broke up with him at the peak of our relationship (he didn't suspect anything and was always kind) and he apparently cried for 2 hours after. I felt like shit.

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  • Yes, hurting someone is the worst feeling in the world.
    I don't regret what happened, but I never wanted to hurt him, and I hate thinking about it.

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    • Yes. It's easier to get your own heart broken than to break someone else's. Your own heartbreak, you get over. I don't the guilt of hurting someone you care/d about ever goes away.

      Have you regretted breaking someone's heart?

    • No because majority of the time, its the person who breaks my heart. The one i did leave is because she never kept her promises.

  • yes... and it felt so terrible when i give him a hopes for nothing because before i dont have a courage to be in a relationship and it hurt him so much when i told him to stop coz i already have someone before... to bad i can't find him anymore to ask for his forgiveness...

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    • You were seeing someone when you gave him hope?

    • nope.. i can't do that to him and before i got a boyfriend... i already told him that i can't return his feeling... and we agree to be friend...

  • Nope. I've only broken up with two and it was for a reason. It just wasn't going to work out so I don't see why I should drag it out.

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    • As long as they were justified

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    • Im not sure. I guess its because she didn't know how to act around me and well she hasn't had much experience dating girls

    • I know what you mean, I've been in a relationship with a lesbian before. It can be a difficult and different transition

  • Never have I broke someone's heart

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  • Yes.

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  • That's never happen

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  • I don't believe I've ever broken someone's heart

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  • I think i did it a lot when i told guys no when they were interested in me i just didn't wanna have any relationship so mostly i friendzoned them or brotherzoned them.

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What Guys Said 102

  • Definitely. I don't think I've ever done anyone dirty, but just like unrequited feelings from really nice girls that I just wasn't into like that. I remember my mom telling me when I was a young teenager that over the course of my life I'd get my heart broken, and I'd break others' hearts, often without even knowing it. Sure enough, I remember a friend telling me an ex-coworker of ours sweated me hard back in the day, and I just never had any idea, and I wasn't into her on that level as it turns out. But she was a really sweet girl and it bummed me out to think that she might have been sad about me not going after her or even think of her like that. But there's a hundred chicks I thought it was the end of the world at the time if I couldn't get with them, lmao, and now I struggle to even remember their names, and I hope the girl who liked me, and any others, have well since gotten over it and have found their happinessπŸ‘ Because let's get serious, who the fuck am I?πŸ™„πŸ˜‚

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  • Every time it happens.. I happen to be pretty emotionally detached, and if someone were to have an attraction for me that I didn't have, there would be nothing I could do about it, because I couldn't understand her feelings if I tried. It sucks to have to reject people this way.

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  • I think there is a part of me that still loves all those I have been in long term relationships with. Some I ended, some they ended. It still hurts even if you know it's the right thing to do. But if you want out of a relationship for a legitimate reason and don't leave you hurting both of you more really

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  • Yeah. I'm actually 51. When I was 31 I met a 19 year old virgin. Sweet but very immature. Told myself "Hands off". It didn't have long term potential With her being a virgin, I didn't want to go there if it wasn't going to be long term leading to possible marriage. She was from Haiti and lived in a black neighborhood. She was used to black guys continually hitting on her. "Hey Gurl". As the evening progressed the more I decided it wasn't going to happen the more she decided I was going to be number 1. My hands off approach had a reverse effect. The more I said no the more she said yes. She had never gone out with a white guy, a bodybuilder, or a guy who wasn't trying to get in her pants. I'm sure it added to the intrigue factor. Anyway, it happened and she fell in love with me. I tried to make it work. There was 12 years between us but it felt like 30. She was really sheltered and had zero concept of how to budget money. It didn't work out and I broke her heart. Still feel like shit to this day.

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  • Gotta break hearts to stay intact, never regretted it ever; it takes courage and maturity to recognize when something needs to be done.

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    • Very true, so not even once?

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    • Yeah, I seem to have some pheromones that attract crazy, haha

    • I actually like crazy lol πŸ˜‚

  • Yes. It was a shitty thing to do -- I kept seeing someone I knew I would eventually leave. She was a lovely person and didn't deserve that heartbreak. I should have ended it as soon as I knew I wasn't going to stay.

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    • You care for her?

    • I don't wish we were still together, but she's a lovely person and deserved better from me. We haven't been in contact for many years. I hope she found happiness with someone else.

  • yes. a long ass time ago I cheated on this guy, and he was very very heartbroken.
    He was suicidal before it happened but when I did it, it made him even more suicidal. i think he cut himself and tried to kill himself over me.
    at the time I didn't even regret hurting him either, i just regret getting caught cheating.
    then a little bit after that i realized how horrible it was and i hated myself for it

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  • I had to leave my last girlfriend because she had unrealistic expectations of what our relationship was supposed to be. In her words, our relationship was supposed to be like the movies.

    Of course real life happened and I had to cut her off and hard. I feel bad though because she was a virgin before me.

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  • Did have one girl who, when I talked to her months later, said she had cried for a week after I left. It didn't make me feel very good, but it had to happen.

    I tried to arrange a hookup but she claimed to be busy with school, though I think she just didn't want to go through that again.

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    • Do you see her around?

    • No, I had called her before I was in her area and she was surprised to hear from me again, but since she claimed to be busy and didn't seem interested didn't bother seeing her. And we live on different continents (why it didn't work out in the first place) and had met on a third one, so there was no chance of running into each other at random.

    • At least you tried to apologize

  • I was friends with a woman from another country back before the internet, we wrote letters to each other. And she decided to come holiday in Australia where I live. It was several months between her telling me about this trip and her getting here. During that time I started a relationship with a woman I met at a night club. It broke the friend's heart when she found out about that relationship. I had no idea she thought we were romantically involved. I did like her though and I regret not knowing she'd invested in our friendship that way.

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    • She probably thought you two were more, did you talk to her about it?

    • Yeah, we talked about it and spent some time together etc. This was twenty-five years ago and we still keep in touch, she's back in her home country though and married now so it all worked out okay.

    • Good for her! It worked perfectly

  • No, I don't generally give a shit if this happens.

    If she was valued enough for me to care about hurting her feelings then I wouldn't be doing it in the first place.

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  • I don't know if it could be classed as breaking someone's heart but I had to deflate a few crushes and it wasn't nice.

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  • Someone has shattered my heart into pieces. She tried to contact me again and she even asked me for a second chance. I cannot forgive her this time because what she has done to me was brutal. I don't know how much months it taken to recover from that shock. No i am trying to merge them and its very tough, but still i am trying. It will take some more time to recover from all of this.

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  • I don't think I've ever broken someone's heart. All my breakups have been amicable.

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  • I broke this girl's heart... And two days later she won the lottery...
    I fucking regretted more than once friend... LOL I'm just kidding though

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  • What? No. Why in the name of all that's evil and corrupt would I?

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  • If I broke a heart, she didn't say it to me.
    IF

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  • To the best of my knowledge, I have not broken anyone's heart.

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  • I've never broken anyone's heart

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  • Never regretted, but always felt bad over it. Not a fun experience

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  • Yes, this one girl i hurt her and I just wish i could go and tell her I'm sorry.

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  • Nah because it was better in the long run for both of us to find more compatible people.

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  • Yeah I did. Kinda still do. It was just an elementary school love so she got over it in like a day or something, but still, I was a dick about it.

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  • I am a Great Asshole. I never regetted a kiss, a friendship or a love which Iam breaked up, until this particullar Girl, who has the best good-bad balance
    I worked for her 2-3 Month to chat with me, an in the End it worked. Now I think she kinda likes me again.
    I dont know, do I love her, but I know she's in some way special.

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  • never have

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  • Yes once when I was 14 years old.

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  • don't go breaking my heart

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  • I have a special someone who I had to break her heart for many reason. I don<t regret doing it because this made me grow as a person (same for her) but I do miss her some times. We had to part way.

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    • Do you keep in contact?

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    • Well she need to learn to stop being lazy and stop blaming others for her failure. Once she do that, i'm completely sure her life will turn for the better. She's a great individual with great skill.

    • Blaming others, I know how that is

  • If I have, it was purely by accident. I don't date for sport.

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  • I get it broken every day by seeing the love of my life with another guy.

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