young people want everything to be easy. Relationships are not easy and being married is a lot harder then just dating someone or even just living with someone. As soon as they hit trouble, and you will hit trouble, they get divorced instead of fighting. For many it was because that is what they learned in their family. I was taught that if you can fall in love, you can work it out. My family had exactly 2 people my mom and dad's age that were divorced. My uncle after 30 years of marriage. My ex wife, everyone in her small family except 1 uncle was divorced. her mom was divorced 2x. We never had a chance. She barely gave anything to trying to fix it. I would have never asked for a divorce.
Unless one of the two people have said " I refuse to do anything else", then there is always a way to fix it. unfortunately, she just refused to try. And she was bringing up shit from out wedding 20 years before. If you hold on to ridiculous shit that long, there is no hope. Esp when I had nothing to do with the wedding, that was her, her mom and my mom. I just did what they told me to do... all I wanted was her.
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Because of social norms. Women in the past didn't have rights and people would be socially ostracized for divorce. In many cases women would be beaten and raped but would have to stay with their oppressor. There are apparently still laws on the book in my town where a man can beat his wife on the courthouse steps on Sunday. Nobody does, but this is significant. It hasn't been that long that women have had rights, and even less since it's been socially acceptable to not be married. That being said I do think the pendulum is swinging a tad far in the other direction, but that's the way things go.
Hmmm some people put up with bs, abuse and disrespect... those are the kind that "stay together"... such as your couple up at top who "fixed" it, eh what they really mean is take disrespect and bs to appear as a good marriage (old fashioned)
And then there are those who have more respect for themselves and don't allow to be treated like scum and still expect you to forgive and be silent... that's smarter people who can afford to support themselves if the other person is not there anymore...
Unfortunately many who don't like to be disrespected, have no other option but to take all that crap because they just cannot survive on their own cause they have nothing going for themselves... that's why, study hard, get a good job, eventually a good career and be independent so that if someone disrespects you, you won't HAVE TO put up with their bullshit and say you "fixed" things as a cover up... when in reality you wish you could just leave the asshole person and move on and surpass that withouthem.
I'm 21 gonna be 22 in a couple of days and already I've had 2 breakups. My first breakup was actually my first boyfriend and he broke up with me because I guess he was done with me although he didn't give our relationship a chance. Second boyfriend we talked about relationships and how we both don't play with hearts and relationships are meaningful yada yada, 12 days into being boyfriend and girlfriend we broke up because my ex started thinking about the future and realized with work, school and his personal was getting to be too much to handle so he decided to let me go but still wanted to stay friends with me.
I've only had 2 boyfriends, which only lasted for a week and I was willing to make it work, I did everything I could to try and convince them not break up. But in the end, I was fighting a losing battle.
Now, I'm heartbroken and crying again.
I don't know why, it could also be the fact that nowadays both parents are working - which leads to having more money but less time to be with the child (ren) - because many people today are already detached from other people since they were young, believing they're independent because they own a cellphone and the house key.
They don't appreciate other people and take things as a given in school, work and everywhere else.
It's also expected that you should date around as much as possible and gain experience, so that you learn to give up on relationships at any given time without wasting too much time or feeling unnecessary pain. Many people will incentive and give you such advices.
Relationships are supposed to work in your favour, you marry someone as if you're doing them a favour.
I think the pic you posted says enough. In the current western age if you want something you buy it. If it's broken, you throw it away and buy a newer better version of that product. I also think it has something to do with people being connected differently than 50 years ago. Currently you can go on any random website and find the love of your life, or cheat on your partner. It's as easy as that. Where as back then you'd have to go to a certain district or w. e to cheat. Of course there were friends you could cheat with etc. but at this moment these friends are everywhere --> a. k. a. the internet.
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people stop trying. too many options/temptations. too many things going on. complications. people just grow apart.
If it is true that couples give up easily on relationships, then perhaps it is in part based on the removal or reduction of certain social stigmas - don't have to be married by age XYZ, you aren't spurned because you are divorced they way you once might have been (though still happens), etc.
After two failed long term (years) relationships, I wonder the following: have people forgotten how to identify the proper match? Were people once more social, allowing for meeting a variety of people and finding the right person for them?Ease of communication, social media, and online dating has made people socially retarded (sorry) about dating and relationships. Falling in love and committing to one person is HARD, and more and more people don't try because there are easy ways out in social media/online dating. Even a decade ago when I was in college, things were better.
I also blame this for the rise in popularity of open relationships. More and more people are *demanding* acceptance for their lifestyle choices. When really no one is obligated to accept or validate you for choosing that lifestyle.The truth? Nobody will like it.
Men just wanna be little players, sleep around with as many women as possible and even when they have a girlfriend they still won't pass a nice piece of ass on the side. With the mindset that if any girl is available then they have hit it.
Then you have a bunch of manginas that take any girl that comes up to them, even the bottom of the barrel and worst of the worst and much like the little players will go for anything that walks but will worship women to no end. Men dont value relationships but most importantly they dont value themselves.
On the other hand ladies are not ladies anymore but sluts who just wanna sleep around and wonder why they have no experience to keep a man or satisfy one since all they know is what feminism has taught them. Most of these women also dont value themselves but dont want to admit it.Because love nowadays is superficial. It's ego based, everyone wants to date someone that fulfills their ego. A guy wants to date a hot girl to show her off, or a rich guy loves it when a girl validates him for his status and money. We forgot about genuine soul connections, so when we do come across that it scares us off, and we run to supericiality because it doesn't hurt as much, and doesn't require work or effort.
why wouldn't you? What's the point of staying with someone who makes you miserable? The ancient desperation for having a companion is diminished by civilized life. When you can survive on your own, there's no incentive to make sacrifices and/or concessions to appease someone else so that they'll keep you around.
I feel like there is some truth to this. We view people as replaceable. I had girls tell me they were crazy about me and they loved me one day and dump me the next. One was dating someone else two weeks later. She didn't understand why this upset me. It's an attachment avoidant culture where we can't effectively communicate our needs from others so we just hit reset.
Fear and lack of honesty and communication I think are the biggest reasons. Relationships take work and compromise, and people are pretty selfish now a days, they just "can't be bothered" or something. Want the "easy fix", not the one that requires work and is healthy.
I got another question for you?
Why woman always bitch about the relationship thing?
Why they are the one responsible for this in the first place?
You want to fuck and ruin people lives when you are from 18-30 but after 30 you need someone to stay with you till you are old and take care of you.
I mean there will be plenty of man alone in old years but there are usually woman that are complaining about this in old age.Simple. Social media. Couples back then had a lot more morals. They were traditional. It was 1 woman for man and vice versa. Companionship mattered.
Nowadays social media has destroyed that because itās so easy to seek a next person. Everything you need to see is right there and communicating is a lot more easier. Back then if you didnāt see a person, you didnāt see them until you saw them. Now itās simply in the touch of a few clicks.The stigma of being with countless others, and merely using them, was wrongfully erased on purpose by groups with an agenda. And the young blindly followed along. So now, there's no shame in use-and-move-on. As such, the ability to comprehend what relationships or love or sex are really for, has vanished. There aren't lovers, only scratching posts. And that makes wisdom and maturity unobtainable virtues.
I think it's because once the guy or girl gets what they want they stop trying. People don't make a whole lot of efforts to be fight for their relationship any more. Also, social media and the abuse of it causes both men and women to be unfaithful. People are so concerned with looks, body and material things and so they leave one person for someone who they think fits those criteria and don't focus on personality and love.
Laziness, they're not that in to the person? Oh and a lot of guys (especially young) seem to get easily pissed off if everything isn't going perfectly, like they seem to have the delusional expectation that everything should be perfect in a relationship. Which is complete bullshit because it's actually unhealthy not to argue or share your thoughts or
I mean, the reason no one was getting divorced before was because it was taboo and women were very reliant on their husbands. Now, women are self reliant so if they find themselves in an abusive or unhappy relationship, they can leave. I don't think more couples are giving up on relationships now, I just think now we can see how rare it really is for two people to remain compatible for years
Now a days Both (Guy and Girls) have more than one option in hand, making friends and rejecting friends is so easy as we are using tissue friend, we never knows whom we are Dating this weekend will also be our friend next week or not, on minor issues Breakups occurs , instead they wanna solve the issue, they prefer breakup and hunt for new thats the reason I think so far
They were also born in a time where divorce was almost taboo. If it had been accepted back then, the rates would have likely been pretty similar to what we have now.
People need to stop romanticizing the past. Nowadays if someone cheats or abuses their partner, they are just going to leave. Plus divorce rates are actually going down not up.
sometimes it's easier to give up then fight for something if you are the only one who is fighting for it
other times it could be because of the lack of communication , no longer trusting that person , fell out of love , cheating ,Because people know their worth and don't have time to waste. Nowadays there is social media so if one relationship doesn't work out, they know they can find someone else.
just my opinion, but relationships last when you turn to Jesus and pray when you have difficulties. thats what I was taught and it seems to work.
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