I cheated on my husband, and I want to tell him. It was guy that he works with at his job. He is a teacher, and I went to go and pick up our daughter from school, she usually is with her father, but his friend came and told me that my husband already took her home. I've had somewhat of a crush on him even before I was married. And we went into his room and started talking and catching up, and the next thing I knew, we were making out on his desk, and then started having sex. I didn't feel any spark, like with my husband, and I feel super guilty. I want to come clean, but I don't know how, please help. And please don't answer rudely, I know what I did was horrible, selfish, and stupid. Just please help.
Most Helpful Guy
55-60% of Americans have been involved in some sort of infidelity in their marriage at some point (TRUE fact look it up). It just so happens that men typically view sexual infidelity as the worst type of betrayal (as opposed emotional with women).
The truth is that nobody here can really answer your question. Nobody here really knows you or your husband.
So YOU need to weigh your options.
Personally I think you should tell...
Here are some reasons I think you should tell:
-The guilt will drive you INSANE.
Every time your husband tells you how much she trusts you, every time he does anything sweet or considerate, your guilty conscience will kick in full gear. You'd be living a lie.
How well do you know this dude you did "the dirty deed" with? Can you really trust your husbands co worker? Probably not knowing he made moves on his co-worker's wife.
-You'd be making another HUGE mistake
You cheated. Okay. There's nothing you can do about it now. But if he finds out you cheated and lied about it. Game Over. He will never trust you again.
-Because you love him and want to move forward
If you expect to move forward in your relationship you need to tell the truth.
Who knows? It might make your relationship stronger.
But if you do decide to tell him make sure your actions speak louder than your words.
- First off NEVER see this other guy again. You have to truthfully tell him that you are completely committed to working things out with your spouse.
- Show your emotions and how much you regret it
Nobody is perfect, and no marriage is perfect... people make mistakes...
Hope that helps
PS - Don't make excuses for why you did it.
I know I'm probably gonna get MAD thumbs down for this... but most women I know who have cheated typically try to justify their actions (i.e. - he didn't pay enough attention to me, ect.). Keep the dude's self esteem in tact.2