My boyfriend found out I cheated. He tells me he can never forgive me.

Should I leave him alone or should I try and show him that I'm sorry? He lives out of state and we have been apart for almost a year. When he found out, he told me he has been saving to buy me a ring. I don't know what to do next. I've been cheating for almost three months and feel like I don't deserve a second chance.

Updates:
I do still want to be with him. I just don't feel I deserve him. I also live so far away, I don't know if he will trust me with so much distance between us. I want to be with him, I just don't want to hurt him anymore.
Thank you for all the advice. I've decided to leave it alone. I've talked to him since this post and have told him so. I'm also going to work on myself. This is devastating and I don't wish to repeat it. Again thank you everybody.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Usually I would just tear into you for cheating on someone. It's quite possibly the worst thing you can do to your partner and nobody deserves to be left with that kind of baggage.

    The reason I'm not is because you have admited that you don't deserve another chance and you don't deserve him. Most people who cheat won't admit that and will just say "ooooh I want him back so badly, what can I do?" without even owning up to how badly they have behaved.

    Just ask yourself why you cheated on him in the first place? did you think the grass was greener on the other side? were you getting bored of your relationship?

    At the end of the day its up to him if he wants to give you another chance but you need to figure out why you cheated on him to make sure it doesn't happen again. and if you think there is even the slightest chance of it happening again then don't try and get back with him as you'll just hurt him even more.

    For the time being just work on yourself. Try and be a better person in general so that when you do see him, he will notice it. Also if your really serious about wanting to get back with your ex then you can't really be sleeping around in the mean time.

    The decision is yours but I can't tell you what the outcome will be as that is up to your ex.

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What Guys Said 7

  • "Should I try and show him that I'm sorry?" - You want only to "show" that you are sorry ? By this sentence, seems to me that there is no "deep regret". If you really sorry - you don't have to try to show, you need to act. For example - if you really love him and want to be with him, move to his city. But even though I am not expect him to take you back, but at least it will show him that you are serious and not just "cheap talk"...

    But if you really love the guy - make him a favour and leave him alone, disappear from his life. He deserves to be with someone who will not cheat on him for 3 months, or doesn't he ?

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  • You deserve a second chance at a relationship, just not with this guy...

    I've been cheated on once by the girl I truly loved. It's the worst feeling in the world, and I highly doubt you've been cheated on by someone you loved. I know this because if you did, you would never commit that much pain to someone you're with. And if you have been and know what its like, but still did, well that just makes you even a more horrible person.

    I have no respect or sympathy for cheaters.

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  • The best way to regret and to say sorry to him is to stay away from his life. You have no idea how much damage you cause to him. Cheating is the worst thing you could do to somone. If you love him,...then leave him alone.

    No...he will never trust you and he will be right to do so.

    You can only forgive yourself...be firm that no matter what happens you will never do such thing to anyone else and then find someone else to be with.

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  • "Should I leave him alone"...What? HE should be leaving YOU alone. Seriously, that's a really low thing to do to a person who thought you loved him. And what's more, he wanted to propose to you. You've been cheating for 3 months, you aren't ready for anything serious so it would smart to quit playing people like this. Stick with one nighters if you want, just don't drag someone through the mud like that.

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  • You don't deserve another chance, I would be done at that point.

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  • WTF! do you not trust yourself to be faithful to him if you are lucky enough to get him back? Cheating for 3 months OMG. Its up to you if you want to change. He bought you a ring! :(.

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  • I think everyone makes mistakes and deserves a second chance..that is if you still want to be with your boyfriend. Do you?

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What Girls Said 3

  • You defiantly DO NOT deserve a second chance. I mean how would you feel if you were being faithful and he was the one cheating? you would feel the same way. To be honest, he probably was saving up to buy you a ring but once he found out he probably spent it all on something else that would be more useful.

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  • i know you still want him. but if I was the guy I wouldn't trust you anymore.

    even if you two really got back together, he'd become more suspicious.. and his love for you would just lessen!

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  • you made a big mistake. you don't deserve the other chance. just end this relationship

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