A couple of weeks ago, he became distant. I found out that he was seeing another girl and just decided to let him know about my attachment to him to let go emotions. And after that, he said that even though he really likes me, he is uncomfortable about seeing me anymore because of my attachment to him. Now his flatmates are telling me how he enjoys spending time with a new girl, how he tells them how hot she is and that she is just amazing. When asked about me, he refers to me as just a one night stand that got too attached.
It hurts more not because he found someone else, but that after half a year of knowing each other he seems to just not care. How do I get over this?
Most Helpful Guys
Sounds like you were the unfortunate recipient of a perfect storm, a lady who is in touch with her feeling and emotion against a guy who seemingly at will can distance himself from his feelings and emotions.
Unfortunately, it's very rare you will get closure from him in the fashion of productive sentences that allow you to understand the man behind the man (so to speak) so you need to focus on you.
Surround yourself with your friends, they will form an essential support network, immerse yourself in things you like to do, reconnect with what makes you special, and wait.
Time will heal all wounds, you will come out stronger, and you will know what not to look for in future, this will all mean you will find that special one, who finds beauty in everything you do, who tells you just how special you are every day.
Wishing you all the best :)
This is a tough one. Many have had to handle this situation before but, truth is, you are feeling its effects now and that is what matters.
It sounds like you love this person very much. Also, it sounds like he is dealing with intimacy issues of his own.
It is difficult for us men to investigate our experiences and the ways that our behavior is shaped by them. It takes years, and sometimes a lifetime, to overcome these issues and realise a new way of thinking.
I hate to say it but, time is your ally here. That said, don't waste it! This experience allows you the opportunity to recognize these patterns in men that you date in the future.
Think about what you need, what makes you happy, and what you'd like to avoid.
There is no better time to get to know yourself then when you're by yourself.
Most Helpful Girl
Learn from it, thats the best thing to do when dealing with hurt. Firstly.. Boys (not men) are ego driven so you look better as a one night stand than you do as an ex girlfriend. That being said, if he says that you got too attached, then step back and analyse your behavior. Did you become to clingy? Did you want commitment before listening to what he wanted? Consider the both of your ages.. Im guessing early to mid 20s? .. you're still discovering who you are in this world, what you want, where you're going and how you're going to get there and while finding all those answers, you will understand what you have to offer a man in a relationship and what it is that you want as well. 😙 boys will tell you whatever you want to hear, its a 'gift' they have but fortunately we fall for it less and less as we learn to listen to what they say and can decipher whats the truth and what isn't. A Man won't tell you, he will show you -trust me.
As for the flatmates - they are enjoying watching you flinch every time they tell you something that is TOTALLY Unnecessary to say.
Instead of taking pain from this, take the lesson about you and move forward. (And if you think you're the first girl he's done this to, i promise you you're not! I also promise you that you won't be the last)
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