I feel like such a loser compared to my ex! Life is so unfair...

So we were together for more than 3 years, out of which he made me suffer a lot because of his jealousy, control issues, mistrust, etc. And I really mean he made me suffer. Sometimes he did stuff behind my back just to p*ss me off, or he'd put me down which totally and completely broke my self esteem. He was really cruel. I'm not saying I was a saint, but yeah, he was meaner than I was.

I dumped him, but he kept trying to get me back. However, he still would criticize me for my friends, for the places I hung out at, etc. He'd call me empty and like every other girl, even a slut.

The thing is, even though he was a douche, he's not suffering, as a matter of fact, all good things happen to him, and bad things happen to me. Case in point, for New Year's I hung out with my friends, drank a bit, and had some sushi, I think the sushi was bad or something, 'cause I ended throwing up the whole night! So no, I didn't have fun. Yet a friend we have in common in facebook posted a video of where my ex was partying, and it seems like he had the time of his life.

He has a great social life, he always goes out, etc. And he has a lot of slutty friends, who're really empty headed, etc., I know them! Yet you know what he told me? That he values them more than me, because I disappointed him with how much I've changed since we broke up. Of course I changed, I'm no longer under his control. He says he feels he deserves all the good things that happen to him, and that maybe I do deserve all the sh*t I've been going through.

I suck at making friends, and most of my friends have other friends, so I'm often left out. I feel like such a loser, and it's so unfair that good things happen to bad people, like him. He was really arrogant last time we talked, he actually said I didn't deserve him, that he's too good for me.
I feel like such a loser compared to my ex! Life is so unfair...
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