Is it normal to still feel a lot of anger and resentment towards and ex a year and a half later?

[desperatelyhungry]

Me and this guy work together, that’s how we met. We dated for about 6 months, it wasn’t a great relationship; he was mentally abusive and cheated. I was too blinded by my feelings for him to leave him until finally I had enough and knew I had to get my shit together. Anyways, I went into it knowing if we broke up I would have to try and be professional around him at work. I mostly just stay away from him, but the few times I have to be around him or pass him in the hall, i still get so angry and have to fight the urge to insult him or call him a name. I know this is immature so like I said, I don’t do it, I just stay away from him and bite my tongue when around him. We haven’t talked for most of that time, I don’t see him outside of work or even look at his social medias. I don’t want to be with him or miss him, he no longer makes me sad, but for the life of me I can’t seem to get rid of this anger. Now he was my first love and my first adult heartbreak, so I figure that is why it’s so hard, but will I ever get over it or will I always be mad? Ofc no one actually knows this, I’m asking in more of a tell me your story if you’ve been through something similar kind of way.

[Anonymous]

You're still hurting, and having to still see him keeps that hurt alive! You can't move on when you still see him and constantly reminded of it. It sucks and why most people won't date co-workers for this very reason. My advice is maybe some kind of counselling would help? (assuming finding other work isn't an option) Finding ways to deal with those feelings and "make peace" with it internally so seeing him in person will get to a point where it won't affect you at all. He'll just turn into another co-worker and "someone you used to know".

[Anonymous]

Just avoid anything that make you close to him if he disturb you or try to make you uncomfortable then say everything you hold against him and vent as he was abusive he deserve that. Holding that anger that long is bad in my opinion either you completely cut everything like changing work place etc or you vent it you will feel better. Few if any can totally walk away from such situations you need true strength.
I had manipulative ex and I did hold lot anger but i choose to walk away changed my number and ghosted her it was the best thing i did sometimes you just need to totally quit the situation

[Qwerrtty]

Yeah.. You'll get over it
You just have to work on yourself by forgiving him.. i know it's not gonna happen suddenly but you can work on it gradually

[JuanVeIasco]

No, women are biologically programmed to get over breakups quickly, if you're still hurting with your ex-boyfriend after a year, it's because he was a dominant, high-value man.

[desperatelyhungry]

That’s cap

[msc545]

It sort of depends on what they did. If I ever saw my ex, I would turn around and walk away for fear that otherwise, I might punch her.

[jshm2]

No. You were stupid and broke the rule of never dating at work.

You're feeling shame, not anger.

[Nahid1707]

Hopefully you can move on this year 😊