What to do when someone has betrayed your trust and made you feel dumb and shamefull?

[Anonymous]

How do you get over this feeling of being betrayed, being a loser and being dumb?
Should we go to get revenge or just let it go, learn from it, try to forgive and forget and move on?
How to shake off this feeling?

[TheAnon1]

Pride & ego is the biggest issue here. Pride is my worst enemy personally. Being betrayed does not make you a loser or dumb. You should take this time to figure out why being betrayed makes you feel the way you do about yourself. And from that, find or cultivate that value within yourself. From there, you will find more people that can appreciate the value that you offer. Revenge is only a short-term win and you will end up in the same cycle without resolving your underlying feelings. I recommend writing a list of: How you felt before the betrayal/How you feel now, as well as a list of the most positive traits you have. The biggest difference between before and after will likely just be your confidence, which you can build back up with time and effort.

[virtue2332]

You have to understand that it had nothing to do with your character and out of your control. Some people just aren't capable of being considerate and selfless enough to do the right thing. You should continue being genuine and mindfully of how it made you feel Incase you are ever put in the predicament of doing the same to someone else. Always be the bigger more highly evolved individual and take comfort and realize your value in this world.

[Smoke-n-Growls]

To me, betraying my trust means we're done.

My past two relationships have broken up because of it. First one cheated on me (with a woman twice our age, married, and who at one point had been our boss); second one lied about having his immigration lined up for months (and never told me until we'd been turned away at the border).

To me, I'm not about to tolerate betrayal of trust. I had a rough childhood, trust is paramount to me. Unless I can trust a person, I don't feel safe with them in a relationship. Especially not with what I like to do and who I like to be.

Betrayal means move on, to me.

But everyone's different.

[DermalPunch]

Had that happen recently. Be done with this person for good! You will feel like you are about to implode but you will feel amazing once you come out of the other side. Also, be strong when they come back trying to slither back into your good graces.

They want to see if they can still continue from your unhealthy place where you didn't value yourself enough to believe you deserved better.

Learn from this and don't connect with people who bring the same toxicity. You sensed it from the start, you just ignored your better judgment.

Don't ignore it anymore.

[DermalPunch]

That's the issue too. You need to feel the feeling. Not ignore or "shake" the feeling. And you remember who made you feel that way sonyou don't let them in to abuse you again.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Holding on to anger causes more harm to you than them, so yes forgive...
But never forget or give them the opportunity to hurt you further..
Revenge, while most of us might have them thoughts, is never the answer, the best revenge is indifference, them knowing they no longer have the power to hurt you... Don't give people more space in your head or heart than they deserve...

[goosebump4444]

I can relate that sucks when something happens like that...
I won't say moving on is a easy task but still worth it.. through my opinion If someone did it with me.. I won't take the revenge path.. I'll just try moved on & let karma do it's work because taking revenge can make the situation even worst.

How to moved on?
👉 try to stay busy.. Like doing your hobbies, spend quality time with friends and family, watch funny movies for ex:scary movie

*hugs you* everything gonna be alright dear not now but soon ✨

[Asker]

Yeah thats good advice but some people dont believe in karma, its not fair, they should know and not repeat it they should go through and feel the same thing, that is the only fair thing, i really hope karma works, i believe in karma but I don't know some people are just immune to it

[RationalMale]

Be multiple things. When Ronda Rousey the female MMA fighter got her face kicked in and humiliated she said she wanted to die but thinking of her family encouraged her.

Don't be a Ronda who is just a pro fighter. Don't just be a lover to your significant other or just a top worker or just your hobby. Be multiple things. Then if one thing flops your life is not over.

[dustybiker]

I shut them out. Take action if possible.

You move on by choice. Choosing not to let it hold you back anymore. Showing that you can and will be happy again. It’s the best revenge.

[Felinegirl]

Learn from it and try to move on to better things.

It's not your fault for being a trusting person, it's their fault for betraying your trust.

[Rei02]

Please don't seek for revenge, this will only make you suffer more. In that case, you need to find yourself again, and everything will come.

[chgybj]

I feel you should avoid and ignore the person until you are ready to let whatever they've done to you go.
Time heals all.

[Wise4myage]

I suggest you focus on moving on and let karma take care of that person.

[Asker]

You believe karma works for real?

[Wise4myage]

Yes, I do.

[Djaay]

Move on , end of story.