Ex unblocked text he misses me do I reply now later?

[Anonymous]

I was seeing a guy for a while on off before & during lockdown , he was too flaky or cancelling plans so I cut him off told him I wasn't interested. He came back this summer he apologised for how he acted said he should’ve treated me better. we got back together in a weird situationship it was long distance he’d moved away we were going to try make it work. He kept inviting me to visit him there. Everything was fine he blocked me on instagram a few weeks later. He met another girl when he got back I asked why he blocked me. I blocked on everything told him I wasn’t interested anymore don't come back again annoyed. After 4 months he sent me a message on instagram "Hi how are you? you're probably mad at me but I miss u" . I blocked him I didn’t didn’t want to talk to him. Now I want to talk clear the air as we ended very badly. It’s months later now I feel ready to reply , I had him blocked on everything. I don’t want him back more of a let’s talk

[Anonymous]

If you feel ready to talk to your ex and clear the air, it's okay to reply to his message. However, it's important to approach the situation with caution and keep your expectations realistic. Here are some tips for how to handle the situation:

1. Take time to reflect on your feelings: Before responding to your ex, take some time to reflect on how you feel about the situation. Are you open to talking to him and potentially re-establishing a connection, or are you simply looking to clear the air and move on? Be honest with yourself about your intentions and priorities.

2. Be clear about your boundaries: If you do decide to reply to your ex, be clear about your boundaries and expectations. Let him know that you're open to talking, but that you're not interested in rekindling a romantic relationship at this time.

3. Avoid getting swept up in the moment: It's easy to get caught up in the emotions of the moment and say things that you may later regret. Take time to think through your responses and avoid making impulsive decisions.

4. Communicate openly and honestly: If you do decide to talk to your ex, communicate openly and honestly about your feelings and concerns. Be willing to listen to his perspective as well.

5. Take care of yourself: Remember to prioritize your own emotional well-being throughout the process. If talking to your ex is causing you stress or anxiety, it's okay to step back and take a break.

Ultimately, the decision to reply to your ex is a personal one that depends on your individual circumstances and priorities. Take time to reflect on your feelings and approach the situation with caution and honesty.

[Asker]

Yeah I ended up reaching out told him I was mad that we can talk when he's back. As there's distance between. He seemed pretty happy said he missed me he wants to talk too. When he said he missed me I mentioned he brought that on himself and he said he made an excuse he was exhausted from my constant message. I'm not sure I liked his response making out it was my fault. Ended the conversation told him I didn't want to talk wait until we meet. I know it wasn't excuse saw picture. Going to wait and see how he is in person. I haven't added him back on social media only unblocked him to send him a message.

[Opinion Owner]

Guess what, it sounds like you handled the situation well by setting boundaries and communicating your feelings. It's important to prioritize your emotional well-being and not feel pressured to communicate with someone if you're not ready or comfortable doing so.

It's understandable that you may feel unsure about his response and want to wait until you meet in person to see how things go. It's important to have honest and open communication when you do meet and to address any concerns or issues that may have led to the previous problems in your relationship.

In the meantime, it's a good idea to focus on your own well-being and do what makes you happy. Take care of yourself and don't feel obligated to communicate with him if you don't feel ready or comfortable doing so.

[Asker]

I'm not sure what we were we got together again very quickly after he came back. It did feel quite intense we were texting a lot he didn't let on he was bothered by that. We probably needed better boundaries and I was maybe more jealous over the distance. We never really spoke about that now he's living on the other side of the world. Maybe he's thought about it since he's the one who's reached out to me both times regardless of the distance maybe he would move bac. It's quite complicated I will be more upfront to see where it's leading although I know for sure I'll be telling him if we aren't living in the same country or going in the same direction it has to end. I still don't know him that well. Or I might even text him again before we meet tell him I don't want to move to the other side of the world just so you know or ask about the distance.

[Asker]

Or I may possibly say I don't want to start anything unless we are living in the same country it's too complicated otherwise.

[Opinion Owner]

It's important to have open and honest communication with your ex and to express your feelings and concerns. It sounds like you have a good idea of what you want and what your boundaries are, which is great.

If you decide to reach out to him again, you could express your thoughts about the distance and how it may affect a potential relationship. You could also ask him about his thoughts on the situation and what he sees for the future. It's important to have a clear understanding of where each of you stand and what your expectations are.

[Asker]

I'll see if I reach out probably wait bring it up when or if we talk otherwise he be thinking I'm already back to him and forgiven him. Maybe he's already thought about that , I still haven't decided if I want to rekindle either maybe I'll be dating someone else by the time he comes back.

[Opinion Owner]

In my opinion, that sounds like a good plan. But first, take your time to think about what you want and what's best for you. Make sure that you're not getting back into a situation that isn't healthy or fulfilling for you. If you do decide to talk to him, make sure to communicate your boundaries and feelings clearly so that there's no confusion about where you stand. And if you end up dating someone else before he comes back, that's perfectly okay too. It's important to do what feels right for you.

[Asker]

Yeah the last time we got back together so fast we had lack of boundaries probably made it way more intense. I suppose it’s a good thing if he’s on the other side of the world he still misses me. I think he tried a relationship too that’s when he first texted saying he missed me although I didn’t reply then blocked him until last week. Guess he realised he messed up and can’t replace me

[Opinion Owner]

It’s probably because your ex has realized that he made a mistake and misses you now that he's tried to move on. However, it's important to remember that the decision to rekindle the relationship should be based on more than just his feelings or regrets.

Before considering getting back together, it's important to carefully evaluate your own feelings and needs, as well as the reasons why the relationship didn't work out in the past. It's also important to establish clear boundaries and communication with your ex to ensure that both of your needs are being met and that any potential issues are addressed before they become problems.

The decision to rekindle a relationship is a personal one, and it's important to take the time to carefully consider all factors and make a decision that feels right for you.

[Asker]

Yeah I’ll see I’m not sure what he wants either he only said he misses me don’t know if he’s trying to say he wants be back or waiting til whenever he sees me. Should I follow him on social media or accept him on mine? Or best to keep distance still a bit?
Noticed he changed his bio to a fake name on ig recently

[Opinion Owner]

It's understandable that you're feeling uncertain about how to proceed in this situation. It's possible that your ex may be reaching out to you because he genuinely misses you and wants to reconnect, but it's also possible that he has other motives or is simply looking for attention.

Before making any decisions about whether or not to follow him on social media or accept him on yours, it's important to consider your own feelings and boundaries. Are you comfortable with the idea of reconnecting with him, or do you need more time and space to heal from the breakup? Be honest with yourself about what you want and need, and don't feel pressured to do anything that doesn't feel right for you.

If you do decide to reconnect with him, it's important to communicate openly and honestly about your expectations and boundaries. It's possible that he may have some explaining to do about why he blocked you and changed his name on Instagram, so be prepared to ask him questions and listen to his responses.

Only you can decide what's best for you and whether or not reconnecting with your ex is the right decision. It may be helpful to seek the guidance of a therapist or counselor to help you work through your feelings and make the best decision for your well-being.

[Asker]

Thanks for all the help I’m all good I did add him back on ig after he requested left it late wasn’t rushing. I’ve been fine so far briefly talking

[Opinion Owner]

You're welcome! I'm glad to hear that you've been able to reconnect with him and that things are going well so far. Just remember to take things at your own pace and make sure that you're prioritizing your own emotional well-being. Good luck!

[Zarapeachy]

You can say what you wish to tell him. Rather do it now than having it on your mind moths or years from now. So get whatever it is off your chest and let it be. He kept you around tbh. The good person he’d settle for when the rest failed.

[Asker]

Oh you think he’s always kept me around? He text me almost 6 months ago i didn’t reply. Had a feeling he would be back first time we was apart nearly a year. Only things are complicated with distance

[Zarapeachy]

He gave you attention and then met another girl and blocked you and then came back with “I miss you”. In reality, it is your choice but you are starting a cycle. A cycle that will be difficult to break off

[Asker]

Yeah he did although first time there wasn’t any girl it was me who broke it off with him for his flakiness. Although I’m not trying to get him back more a talk clear the air let him apologize if he wants it’s way too complicated for anything more than friendship. I’m more gonna say “yes I’ve been mad at you I suppose we can talk when you’re back “

[Zarapeachy]

Do you need an apology?

[Asker]

Not really maybe it be good to talk through everything

[Zarapeachy]

Then have your convo and let it rest.

[Asker]

Yeah lll see what happens

[Asker]

I spoke to him he said it would be good to talk and asked how I was , he said I miss you by the way.
I said well you did bring on yourself
But it seems like he’s blaming me not even mentioning meeting a girl ,
I’m sorry I made an excuse because I was exhausted by your constant messages “
Anyway I ended the conversation told him I don’t want to talk now until we see each other. Might even leave it as that tbh

[Zarapeachy]

My opinion is leaving it as is because he might not see your side and understand your side and that might upset you. So let things be.

[Asker]

Yeah I think I am leaving it and I know he didn’t make an excuse saw a pic of him with a girl and he didn’t really say anything all he did was block on instagram we didn’t even talk there. And cause he turned it around on me which is a odd way to say sorry. Yeah I ended the conversation straight away