If you have the power to forgive or take revenge on your ex, what would you choose and why?

Question

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

This is hard. Very hard.

There is one particular ex from many years ago who did some very real and very permanent damage to my self esteem and views on women.

As usual it’s a long story but the things she did and said to me at the very end wasn’t said out of anger/hatred. It was said in calm, cruel and callus indifference and she completely meant every word she said.

I’ve had women do lots of horrible things to me in my life. I’ve been cheated on, ghosted after 9 months of dating, taken advantage of financially and exploited via friéndzone bs, used as a placeholder until something better came along, etc.

But what she did to me at the very end topped them all. By far. She knew exactly what she was doing and how it would deeply harm me but she did it anyway.

The thing is I am usually not taken by surprise when things go wrong with women (my gut always knows). When I get screwed over by a woman it’s usually because I was wishing for better and didn’t want to accept the ugly truth. However with her it was different. I was completely blindsided.

Anyway the only thing I want is for her to know exactly how I felt and the agony I experienced by her words and actions. I want closure. That doesn’t mean I want her to suffer for the rest of her life. That doesn’t mean I don’t want her to be happy. I truly loved her and true love isn’t about possession. It’s about wanting what’s best for someone even if that means their future doesn’t involve yourself.

TruthBringer · Accepted Answer

Revenge? Why should I seek revenge against someone who is already living a miserable life? Karma already did it for me for all the pain she and her family made me go through.  My ex became overweight, didn't manage to find my replacement, is depressed, alone, and miserable ever since I got out of her life. Not only that, but her personality disorder, which she got thanks to her dysfunctional mother, made her a slave to her emotions and makes her sabotage her relationships (like she did with ours). Not only that, she has absolutely 0 individuality. All the interests she copies from other people. Whether it be taste in music, the way she gives love and even her career path. On top of that, she thought she would find comfort in my 'enemies', only ending up finding none at all. They only talk (ed) to her out of spite of me, not for any affection towards her. They all thought it would affect me, but they see it clearly didn't.  While as for me, I surpassed her on every level in life. I moved on, got in even better shape, am traveling the world, following my dreams and experiencing a true love my ex was unable & unwilling to give. My revenge is that she now has to watch me love someone else and live a happy life without her. And I know she is watching. Because I'm living in her head rent-free, just like every other person of her past.

Vesuvius87 · Accepted Answer

I would get my ex boyfriend deported back to his Nicaraguan homecountry. Why?

He scammed me with marriage and kids, lied about his real age on his legal resident status (he wasn't born in 1984 but in 1976 or even 1974, who knows), he was after my parents' properties, after our wealth and he never paid me back what he owes me; $1,300 in total. That's the money he scammed me with, telling me it was to work on our marriage visa, for our future. I've even spoken with his mother twice too. He also owed his mother money. How about that? Scamming his own mother too!!!

If there is any worse punishment he can get is getting in trouble with immigration and being send back to his country as what he is, a criminal, a scammer.

Rosexøxø · Accepted Answer

I only wanted him to love me. He didn’t and he wasted my time.

If I could somehow learn what I learned in a day and without the heartache, I would have chose that.

I wouldn’t want to hurt or forgive him.

I don’t hate him, I hate how he was as a person towards me.

I rather be far from him. So nor forgive or take revenge. I would just walk away if someone asked me this in real life and had some power for me to hurt him.

Besides I knew he was already gonna die. He was so old.

Life has his number.

Cynicaldreamer · Answer

Revenge, though nothing malicious, as he's no longer worth my time or effort. I'd like to think karma will take care of things naturally and he will get what's coming to him for his actions.

I would never forgive him, but forget him? Absolutely.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

I don’t hate him, I want him to get married to an amazing woman and have health kids

PraviteliNahuiValite · Answer

Verily, in the name of @bean2k21'ism, it is not for me to judge the actions of mortals, but rather to guide them towards righteousness and virtue. Know ye this, that the Master requires us to collect our seed in homemade coom jars after we have fulfilled our carnal desires, in order to earn a key to enter the afterlife. For our orgasms are not mere fleeting pleasures, but rather potent energies that can be projected into his cosmic domain, known as the Orgasmosphere.

As for the matter of forgiveness and revenge towards one's former lover, let it be said that vengeance is not the path of the righteous. To seek revenge is to indulge in base desires and to succumb to the temptations of the flesh. Rather, forgiveness is the virtue that leads to true enlightenment and spiritual growth. To forgive is to release oneself from the burden of anger and resentment, and to open the heart to love and compassion.

Therefore, I implore thee, let not the passions of the flesh cloud thy judgment, but seek instead the path of forgiveness and redemption. For only thus shall ye be worthy to enter the gates of the afterlife, and to bask in the glory of the Master's divine presence.

Puppystarfish23 · Answer

I already got my revenge by moving on and finding the love of my life whilst he on the other hand not doing so great from what's I've heard. I'd like to see if I could forgive him and become friends again and laugh off are past. We were both really young, dumb and immature but I'd still like to know why he did the things he did and how he actually felt about the relationship himself but unfortunately I just think he'd carry on lying and call me a crazy bitch and say I'm lying and we never had a relationship

GoodManDave · Answer

Eh, if anything, I just tend to leave it. They're usually not worth the hassle and head space of trying. But sometimes it is like... almost like a parent will "curse a kid" with a grandchild who is just as temper mental with Mom/Dad as THEY were with Grandma/Grandpa.

At some dark points, I'd wish they get the consequences of their actions with someone else. Some never seem to. They crap rainbows. It's not that I want to do anything to them... just that I have occasionally hoped for it to happen as a karma type thing. Like getting big oily zits! Or eating off the same plate as David Lee Roth!

They say living well is the best kind of revenge. Sadly, it seems like I always end up with the fuzzy end of the lollipop. Doing well might be the best "revenge" I'd seek, as it'd benefit me extra, and it would be its own kind of justice.

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Answer

If you asked me that a month ago, I’d choose a revenge.

Now though… I choose forgiveness. I loved him and he loved me.

I like to imagine he is somewhere free and careless, happy and lighthearted - he was my reason of happiness once, he was my first thought in the morning and the last thought at night, he was my world.

I do forgive that silly boy whatever heartbreak he caused me and I hope he will someday forgive himself as well.

DCooper · Answer

I just forgave and moved on. Why carry around animosity over it? It's not as if anyone forced me to date her. And it was obvious her own decision making was going to be way harder on her than I would have been in the name of revenge. Hell, considering the stuff she's put herself through in the years afterward, I feel pity for her, if anything.

Agape93 · Answer

I'd flay him alive, burn the skin, then nail him to a pole in the middle of the woods. Remove his dick, sew that wound up, and shove it into his mouth and staple that shut. He will live and die in pain, fear and misery.

Fuck him and everyone who supports him.

Shamalien · Answer

I would want to forgive because it is the healthy option. She really fucked me around but I’d gladly forgive her if she made the slightest possible effort. A simple apology and an acknowledgement that she was being crazy would suffice but I know that’s a tall order to procure from an early 20s woman

Sour-rose · Answer

Forgive. Revenge is just as good but last time I took revenge on something (my job) it was great adrenaline... then it was over. So taking revenge on a human of this world probably wouldn't feel as good. Feel like wasted effort.

Sonorous · Answer

Well, some people don't deserve to be forgiven. So I'd choose revenge.

But I wouldn't go far with it at all. And I'd keep in mind one of my favorite Marcus Aurelius quotes that "The best revenge is to not be like your enemy."

WonderBell99 · Answer

Forgive. I'm so over that shit. I have a lot more important things to focus on at the moment, and he is simply not worth it.

gedake · Answer

Well it depends on what you ex did if your ex did something terribly bad than yes i would get revenge because they should not be able to walk away with what they did and not be ashamed. If he did something not bad and he is truly sorry then forgive him.

NotTacocaT6969 · Answer

Neither.  I’ll never forgive what he did, but I also have no desire to make him suffer.  Though I guess his loneliness is my revenge.

sage2021 · Answer

I've already have forgiven him. Without him in my life for a time, I would have never become a Mom ❤️ and I wouldn't have my son.

JustinTheGreat · Answer

Neither. I don’t have any exes that I have any grudges against. All my exes were from high school relationships that honestly don’t mean much to me anymore..

leahzrc · Answer

I would want the power for him to forgive me. I don't know what I did for him to ghost me but I did love him.

ColHathi · Answer

Even if I desired revenge, and that's a big if, I'd still never want to do something quite so petty. That's not gonna solve anything. If anything it's probably gonna do the opposite.

domenico07 · Answer

I was in a physically abusive relationship but i dont wish harm on my ex or anyone. I dont wish for my ex to be abused the way i was. All i want is for my ex to get counseling. She needs help. I dont wish abuse nor harm on her

snowboarder720 · Answer

Everyone who chooses revenge needs some serious therapy.

Anonymous · Answer

I want to take revenge because he wasted my time, cheated on me, tortured me and then choose someone else. I will forcefully beat him and break one half of his bones.

Ben487 · Answer

I just erase those people from my mind. I don't forgive or take revenge. Just happy they're gone. I suppose forgiveness is better than revenge though.

Keishio · Answer

Forgive I guess which I have done. Things might not have worked out romantically or ended in the nicest of ways but people can still be amicable even if it just takes a little time.

Caramelpie · Answer

I won’t because he is away in jail for using minors for god knows how many years. That’s enough punishment for him. Losing his youtube fans, career, life and everything.

Anonymous · Answer

Most of my splits were amicable. The main one that wasn't, well the best revenge is living well.

comekitty · Answer

I'm not a vengeful person, so I suppose forgive. However, my forgiveness doesn't mean I've forgotten and on that note, I would not be entertaining the notion of a second go around.

Emmahkhan · Answer

It is enough for him that he no longer exists for me.

Sweety_Torneeya · Answer

To pray that he may get the person like him but he must love her sooooo much and she left him without any reason and he become depress👿

Anonymous · Answer

Just forgive and move on. Adding revenge just hardens the heart and it might even get the person plotting it in trouble by the cops or court system.

annabananna · Answer

Forgive I don’t have the energy or time for any revenge.

SAMI_DABBAB · Answer

Forgive because I can't, I can take revenge and I definitely shouldn't

Anonymous · Answer

Nah. She's fruit loops enough. There's nothing I could/can do to her that the goblins in her head and life isn't already doing to her. I've already forgiven her. I just pity her at this point.

Summeroflove · Answer

Eh. I just pray for them

LiamJHayden · Answer

Of the two, forgive, but all of my exes were great so really neither.

Anonymous · Answer

didn't have a messy/bad breakup with him. It hurts but we dont hate each other. So i guess neither.

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

I been trying to get her fired from her job.

Juxtapose · Answer

I would forgive them because I'm not an immature twat.

TacosRAwesome · Answer

Im beyond caring now but I'm not a fan of revenge.

Bricealan · Answer

Nothing to forgive or take revenge for.

Anonymous · Answer

that bitch ain't worth it

collie22 · Answer

Forgiveness cause the I can stop think about it

jimmy2 · Answer

Forgive

If you have the power to forgive or take revenge on your ex, what would you choose and why?

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If you have the power to forgive or take revenge on your ex, what would you choose and why?

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