Is it wrong to divorce because of jealousy and verbal and emotional abuse?

[Anonymous]

He'd check on me every half an hour. Video call at work to see if I'm sitting next to a guy. If I went to bathroom for 4 minutes and didn't reply a text and accuse me of doing something fishy. Check phone contact text mail and even google drive.

His house is next to my work and I have to come home if I get a half an hour break because he's jobless and is at home all day. I pay for everything and he mocks me that I have bought him. He lied about getting money to help in multiple times.

He's went to the doctor because this time I came back home and said I'm leaving. He screamed and shouted and tries to run aggressive towards me and his family holds me back. Because I can't make any movement without telling him and I went to the atm 5 mintjes away from my work and called him on the way home to tell him i went there he rushed out of the house to harass me on the street. Snatched my phone and check my calllist. Said he saw me with a guy in a bike. If I'm with friends colleagues or family he'd call me or text me continuously to keep me busy with him.

He insults my family says they're helping me cheat. And if I meet my family members in a sudden plan and didn't inform him right away he said if I don't come back now he'll come and beat all of us up.

This time because he knows I'm leaving he is all calm and cool now and apologizing. first he's begging that he can't leave without me. Then he was calm and telling that he took his bipolar meds for a week and is all better now. Then I stopped responding and he called to tell me "okay I choked you, said I'll smash your head and beat you up but I never did and didn't I don't any good thing? Can't you even text me to say happy new year?"

Is it wrong to leave now that he's been diagnosed? He had swx with me 3 times while I'm asleep even I told him not to after the 1sy time. its just too much hurt and it outweighs any love I had for him.

Updates

1 y

I just feel worried ifbjts too soon to divorce we've been married for 3 months only. Should I wait? He's saying he's trying to change his behavior

[VikingWarLord]

This is another reason why lifelong monogamy is a SCAM

It turns people into psychotic control freaks.

Before you leave him, give him the book "SEX AT DAWN" by Cacilda Jetha and Christopher Ryan. You should read it with him actually

[slatyb]

No, that's a perfectly good reason to divorce. He's highly abusive. Get the hell out ASAP. See a lawyer and file for divorce.

[Anonymous]

No, it is not wrong to want to leave a relationship that involves jealousy, verbal and emotional abuse, and sexual coercion. These behaviors are not acceptable and can have serious negative effects on your mental and physical health.

It's important to prioritize your own well-being and safety, and to seek professional help and support if needed. You may want to consider reaching out to a therapist, a domestic violence hotline, or a trusted friend or family member for help and guidance.

It's also important to remember that you do not owe your partner anything, especially if they have been abusive or coercive towards you. You have the right to leave the relationship and to protect yourself from harm.

If your partner has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, it's important to remember that this does not excuse or justify their abusive behavior. While bipolar disorder can contribute to mood swings and other symptoms, it's important for individuals with this condition to seek proper treatment and take responsibility for their actions.

Ultimately, the decision to leave the relationship is up to you, and it's important to trust your instincts and do what feels right for you. Remember, you deserve to be treated with respect, kindness, and love, and it's never too late to seek help and make a change.

[Asker]

I've always been an independent woman valuing freedom. Now I just can't get the obsessive thoughts out of my head that's saying maybe it's easier to try and live with him than be a 29 year old divorcee which is gonna make my life difficult. But that thought goes away after some time.
Yes he's taking medication. His family and he tells me that he's all better now.
He blames everything on his illness now that he has been diagnosed with one. Sometimes he says he didn't realize what he was doing sometimes he said he made a mistake. His words aren't sincere and his tears aren't either. He came to my family's house unexpected begging for forgiveness for shit talking about them. He's calling and texting all my extended family members asking help from them to get me back. He's taunting me for being immature for blocking him and deciding to leave so soon. I don't see any real change. He's still obsessive.

[Opinion Owner]

It is understandable to have concerns about what others may think or how your life may be impacted by getting a divorce. However, your safety and well-being should always be a top priority. It is important to remember that divorce does not define you as a person and it is not a reflection of your worth. Many people go through divorce and are able to move on and create happy and fulfilling lives for themselves.

It is also important to recognize that your partner's behavior may not be entirely due to their illness. While bipolar disorder can certainly contribute to these behaviors, it is not an excuse for abusive or manipulative behavior. It is important for your partner to take responsibility for their actions and work towards making real changes in their behavior, rather than simply blaming everything on their illness.

It sounds like you are not seeing any real change in your partner's behavior and that he is still being obsessive and manipulative. Trust your instincts and prioritize your own well-being. It may be helpful to seek support from a therapist or counselor who can help you navigate this difficult situation and make the best decision for yourself.

[berisky23]

Get out of that situation as quickly as possible. I can post links in reply to this comment if you like of places that can help you if you feel stuck?

[Asker]

I'd appreciate that thank you. I do feel stuck because he's begging and saying nice things about how he's changing himself taking medication through a doctor. And addressing every issue I ever had and saying he'll Fix them.

[berisky23]

What country are you from so I can give you the right links? Or if you'd rather say in private for obvious reasons drop me a message

[Asker]

It's okay. I'm from Bangladesh

[Anonymous]

No those are good reasons for divorce. I’m kind of wondering why anyone would marry a man like that in the first place.

[Asker]

Just blind faith that maybe if we're together and I'm in front of his eyes he would see that I'm honest and loyal and know that he was wrong. But it went worse from asking me to change mu dress before work to saying I'm going to get myself satisfied but male colleagues