Is it really necessary to have closure?

[Mdavila]

I always like to have closure, at least it was important to me after my last “adventure” ended, I struggled a lot couldn’t say nothing about it to my closest friends because I was scared of all the trouble it would bring to me and the guy, it was a mistake, I left but I wanted closure, answers but I had none, I texted him a lot of times asking him trying to fix things, but I knew It could never be fixed, so I got really sad and depressed, angry for the choices I made, in the meantime I opened this gag account and started to asked and people gave me their point of view of the situations and even if the guy never gave me the closure I wanted, I am extremely grateful for the people that answered my post giving me their points of view because now I feel I have the closure I needed, maybe Im wrong but yea closure is necessary for me.

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh girl, I totally get wanting closure after something ends badly. It's so hard not having all your questions answered and being left hanging like that.

I think reaching out for different perspectives from friends was a really smart idea when you couldn't get it directly from him. Sometimes an outsider's view is exactly what you need to start processing things differently.

It sucks that guy couldn't give you what you needed to feel at peace with it. But I'm glad talking it out here seemed to provide some of that closure indirectly. You deserved to stop beating yourself up over it!

Try not to dwell on the bad choices - we've all made mistakes. Seems like you're in a much better headspace now looking ahead. You got this girl!

Keep surrounding yourself with people who build you up. Before you know it this will be a distant memory. You deserve way better than what that guy gave you anyhow. Chin up sis! 💜

[Mdavila]

Thanks😊

[Oliverlogan263]

My pleasure 😊🌹🌹

[melnc]

You don’t need an explanation or apology to move on, you need acceptance. This means that you have to accept that situation for what it is without a sufficient explanation. Once you accept the situation, it’s easier to make peace with it to move forward. And realize that it’s the other person’s issue if they can’t or won’t explain. It’s not easy to do, but it’s a sanity saving must.

[melnc]

Thanks for the MOH 🌹

[Anonymous]

Closure is important for everyone. We all need closure, it may not end on a good note but we need to have it done with and to understand what happened. It wasn't a relationship but I had a crush on the girl and what's just say we had a unique relationship. To this day I do not understand what I was to her, I may not think about it all the time but the random times I do it still confuses me and bugs me. It'd be nice to have the closure of understanding what it was, I don't even care what it was. I just want to know.

[Mdavila]

I understand, I felt the same way too, wanted to know what it was, why and what I was to him but everybody is different, we just have to learn from our mistakes and keep moving forward

[molonski2]

Personally, I don't think in Black / White terms like that. Closure? It's open ended , it's a state of mind , a feeling within that particular individual.
If you habour bad thoughts that karma will come back on you , and things are never absolute , I think of everything as open ended phases , and yeah , stuff goes wrong you can count on that , but bombarding the other person for reasons or the like helps no one.

Least of all yourself , it's a state of mind , think of life as a circle , not a square or a box.

[ArrowheadSW]

Not having closure can be rough. But on the other hand, I'm not sure that we get closure to everything that negatively impacts us. There have been relationships I've had in the past that I'm not sure I'll ever get full understanding of. But we just have to move on. People have their problems and issues. Often they take them out on us and there is no logical explanation. I remember back in my mid-twenties, I confided in a friend who was several years older. I said, "But this makes no logical sense!"... He said that when it comes to that kind of thing, you have to throw all logic out the window... LOL

[slatyb]

No, it's not. You can have closure by yourself, you don't have to go back and bother people you no longer see.

[rosemilk]

the best closure you can have is the closure you give yourself. can't always have someone else give you closure

but yeah, regardless, it is important to have to move on